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Old 09-03-2019, 04:02 PM
Shagnasty is offline
Join Date: May 2000
Posts: 27,436
To show my redneck heritage, my father always had a pickup truck with beer windows in the back (those were sliding windows where you could reach back and grab a new beer without taking your eyes off the road).

He would take me and my friends driving but we had to sit in the back in the scorching Louisiana heat where you were lucky to stand up without losing significant skin in the process. Nothing was illegal back then because accidents hadn't yet been invented. We got stopped a few times and the cops always apologized to us and told us to make it home safely. You could blow things up with our homemade cannon and our full scale arsenal as the mood struck.

The liquor age was officially 18 but nobody checked. It was really just a height chart measured by the store counter so, if you were over 12 or so, you were in the game. The driving age was 15 but nobody cared about that either. I learned to drive when I was 13, drove everywhere when I was 14 and got my full license on my 15th birthday.

I still refuse to acknowledge the turn of the century. As recently as 2000, I tried to smuggle my pet iguana through Logan airport because I didn't have anyone to take care of my junior T-Rex. I tried to explain to the very buxom security agent that she better be careful when she opened that pet carrier but she didn't listen. She opened it anyway and ended up with a giant lizard holding on to her boobs. She screamed, he bolted down the terminal and I had to run through security to catch him.

I would probably be shot for that today. Simpler times.