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Old 09-14-2017, 09:45 AM
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Broomstick Broomstick is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: NW Indiana
Posts: 27,343
Originally Posted by choie View Post
So I guess I'll just state upfront that I know this is trivial and unimportant to everyone in the world but me.
But it IS important to you. And many of us also get "overly" emotional about "silly" things that have deep personal meaning to us.

As I've documented elsewhere, I have cluttering/hoarding issues that were in... well, I don't know if "remission" is the right word, since it's not a disease, but I've controlled them and maintained a decent level of cleanliness in my home. That control broke apart starting this year, which has been one of the worst in my life after losing my brother-in-law.
Hello, my name is Broomstick and I have hoarding tendencies.

::: chorus "Hello Broomstick":::

Choie, hoarding/cluttering/hanging onto stuff to the point it causes you a problem IS a type of mental illness. It's not like, say, crushing depression or schizophrenia but it IS a real problem. Like all such problems, it's on a spectrum. Good on you for working on solving the problem in your own way.

That said - as already pointed out, some of your childhood was thrown out. It was inexcusable behavior. I'm somewhat acquainted with the backrooms of professional laundries/cleaners and while such people SHOULD be professionals and SHOULD inform a customer in the event of damage not all people are ethical or competent. I'm deeply sorry on your behalf that this has happened. I know how gutted I feel when one of my keepsakes is destroyed, four of them at once is heartbreaking.

And yes, of course this is tied up to other losses you've recently had.

I'm older than you and I still have my first teddy bear. It's the only stuffed animal I've hung onto, and I hope to keep it the rest of my life. Silly? Yes. But after having lost most of the rest of my family I'm reluctant to let go of this one.

You are not silly, you are not immature, you are hurting. Unfortunately, there's not much I can do for you other than give you a virtual hug.


Whew. I'm just venting. I know there's nothing to be done. The cleaning company hasn't gotten back to me, as mentioned, so I'm assuming they got in touch with the laundry and were told "no, we don't know what happened to your crazy client's toys, who gives a fuck" and thus had nothing to tell me.
People get a LOT of sentimental and nostalgic stuff cleaned. Baby blankets. Toys. Etc. Most people understand that people/customers get attached to stuff and it's important to the customer. That doesn't make you "crazy". Given how calm and collected you were it's doubtful they consider you "crazy". I assure you, there are FAR worse customers displaying far more "crazy" behavior than you have.

So I don't know what to do. Should I call the cleaners again to see if they checked with the laundry after all?
Yes, call the cleaners again.

Should I write a bad Yelp review for the laundry? I don't know.
Give the laundry ample opportunity to resolve this before you go to social media.

I guess there's nothing to do. These animals had no value except to me, and to a slightly lesser extent my sisters. I can't imagine asking for reimbursement, especially because putting a price to these four stuffed animals seems ridiculous (even though to me they were so precious).
You could potentially take them to small claims court over this, but wining might be difficult. That would be a last resort.

And yet I'm left with this incredible sadness.
Of course you do. You have suffered yet another loss. You are grieving. It's OK.

It's not entirely possible that part of my mourning is leftover grief from losing my brother-in-law/friend a year ago; or even residual grief for my parents.
Possible? It's certain. These losses are all touching each other.

Sorry. Snark away. It's my fault and I'm to blame, and no 51-year-old loser should care about stuffed animals. I know it.
Nonsense. You are hurting. You are to IMMEDIATELY stop calling yourself "crazy" and a "loser". Stop it.

You are going through some awful emotional stuff involved with losing family members to death. Of course this spills over into other stuff, sort of straw that breaks the camel's back. I don't want to derail this thread but I could go on for pages about the silly, inconsequential stuff that can start my bawling since my husband died last April. It's part of the normal grieving process. This is just one more loss scraping a raw wound. It's OK to be angry, sad, and frustrated.

Vent away.