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Old 05-15-2019, 08:15 PM
you with the face is offline
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Laurel, MD
Posts: 12,659
Originally Posted by MichaelEmouse View Post
It seems to mean that men are as constrained in showing emotions as women are constrained in showing sexual desire. There's a narrow range with exceptions in specific circumstances (no crying except at funerals, no sex except in a relationship). I guess "slut" and "wimp" have about equal impact as policing term.

A woman who is deeply affected by something could have a meltdown while a man in the same situation could go into a rage. It would come from the same place but would manifest in very different ways. The man's way (fight) is more likely to cause needless harm and the woman's way (flight) is more likely to fail to engage in defense. Maybe 200 000 years ago, the woman's way was more likely to be inappropriate than the man's. We live in a society where the man's way is more often inappropriate.
The same difference is seen in the self-harming behaviors that depressed, socially alienated women engage in vs the outwardly violent behaviors of their male counterparts. Both are damaging, but the latter is going to affect more people more severely. Add a gun worshipping culture on top of that which celebrates “bad asses” and you have things like mass shootings.

We talk all the time about how media portrayals of super skinny women contributes to eating disorders and other obsessions in women who internalize the idea that to be beautiful and worthy, they have to be thin. Toxic femininity in other words. What we really haven’t discussed is how media portrayals contributes to analogous pathologies in men.