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Old 05-27-2019, 08:25 AM
monstro is offline
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Richmond, VA
Posts: 21,148
Originally Posted by BigT
I've never met someone who is actually a good person, actually helping the world, who embraces toxic masculinity. The concept just describes things that we all know are wrong, and thus disadvantageous to our prosperity as a species. That's what "wrong" means.
I have met plenty of good guys who embrace elements of toxic masculinity. Just thinking you have to be to be strong all the time is toxic. So is being a workaholic because you think it's the "man's" job to be the breadwinner and only a "weak" man would allow his wife to carry him.

Plenty of good guys have copped to feeling like a "loser" because they are virgins. If this isn't the manifestation of toxic masculinity, I don't know what is.

I think labeling toxic masculinity as something only "bad" people embrace is a very unhelpful way at looking at this. All of us have potentially toxic beliefs that we've absorbed from our social envirfonment. To whit, a woman who thinks she's unlovable unless she's beautiful has embraced a toxic belief, but that doesn't mean she's a toxic person. She may pass that belief onto her daughters as easily as she passes the belief that women are just as smart and capable as men. Making this a "good people" versus "bad people" thing is turning a complex problem into a damn cartoon. It's no different than defining "racism" as something only the KKK espouses, when all of us are vulnerable to harboring racist beliefs and prejudice.