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Czarcasm · 12-06-2016, 04:17 PM

No novelty songs, please-Just the ones you hear every year on the radio.

For me, it's Madonna's sterile version of "Santa Baby". I much prefer Eartha Kitt's version.

nearwildheaven · 12-06-2016, 04:19 PM

I have never liked "Away in a Manger", by anybody.

Two Many Cats · 04:47 PM

Jingle Bell Rock has always been vomitous, in my opinion.

It's so frickin' white bread it sets my teeth grinding.

Skywatcher · 05:10 PM

I've found a nice station (Vancouver's CISL) that doesn't play any really crappy Christmas music. No Shoes, their Grandma is the superior Irish Rovers version and isn't played all that often, etc.

kunilou · 05:25 PM

The very first Christmas song I heard this season was a smooth jazz version of Oh Come All Ye Faithful.

I don't like smooth jazz to start with, and if you're going to do Oh Come All Ye Faithful, then do it like this!

Chefguy · 12-06-2016, 05:25 PM

Feliz Navidad, may it and its author burn in hell for a million years.

ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness · 12-06-2016, 05:31 PM

Little Drummer Boy by anybody.

If there's a good version of this one, I haven't heard it. And yes, that includes Bing and Bowie, and Joan Jett's versions.

pulykamell · 12-06-2016, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kunilou

The very first Christmas song I heard this season was a smooth jazz version of Oh Come All Ye Faithful.

I don't like smooth jazz to start with, and if you're going to do Oh Come All Ye Faithful, then do it like this!

Oh, I really thought that was going to link to the Twisted Sister version.

Ethilrist · 12-06-2016, 05:36 PM

The Twelve Days of Christmas. Any song where people commonly make it into a joke because of how long it takes to sing the chorus? Not a good song.

MovieMogul · 12-06-2016, 05:36 PM

Any incarnation of THE FIRST NOEL. Especially if it's part of a vesper or church service I'm attending and have to sing along to. Hate.

Marvin the Martian · 12-06-2016, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness

Little Drummer Boy by anybody.

If there's a good version of this one, I haven't heard it. And yes, that includes Bing and Bowie, and Joan Jett's versions.

This. What a stupid concept for a song. let's see, you've been on the road forever, spent hours looking for a place to stay, squeezed out a baby, and finally got him to bed. Then some kid comes up and offers to play a drum solo, and you agree ? Please...

hogarth · 12-06-2016, 05:52 PM

I've been occasionally tuning in to the local "all-Xmas music" station. Two of my least favourites so far this year have been "It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year" (my Xmas doesn't usually include ghost stories or toasting marshmallows) and "It's A Marshmallow World" (way too saccharine for my taste). I don't mind "Walking In A Winter Wonderland" in general, but it's been played way too frequently on the station in question so I'm sick of it by now.

My least favourite Xmas song of all time is probably "I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas". That fake "widdle kid" singing just puts my teeth on edge. Luckily I haven't heard it so far this year.

enalzi · 12-06-2016, 05:54 PM

Little Saint Nick, only because "Christmas comes this time each year" is the worst lyric ever.

Sunny Daze · 12-06-2016, 05:56 PM

Baby, it's cold outside. Not one more time, please. I don't care if Ella Fitzgerald is singing it, I don't want to hear it again. This year they're playing it every other song.

Happy Lendervedder · 12-06-2016, 05:59 PM

Holly Jolly Christmas.

Sir T-Cups · 12-06-2016, 06:03 PM

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.

Oh god I cringe every time I hear it. I haaaaaaaaate that song

WOOKINPANUB · 12-06-2016, 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hogarth

<snip>

My least favourite Xmas song of all time is probably "I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas". That fake "widdle kid" singing just puts my teeth on edge. Luckily I haven't heard it so far this year.

I've been meaning to ask where this fucking ear poison came from. Is it from a movie or something? It feels like it's supposed to sound retro but I'm sure I would have heard it before. Fuck off; hippopotamus girl. I hope you get one and it sits on you.

WOOKINPANUB · 12-06-2016, 06:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Happy Lendervedder

Holly Jolly Christmas.

Ok, I know I already posted but this is was what I meant to comment on before I got sidetracked by the goddamn hipppo song.

CheshireKat · 12-06-2016, 06:32 PM

Christmas Don't Be Late by Alvin & the Chipmunks. Thankfully I haven't heard it in a few years.

TBG · 12-06-2016, 06:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chefguy

Feliz Navidad, may it and its author burn in hell for a million years.

I'll forever love that song for its association with the old Sesame Street Christmas that used to run every year (yet sadly seemed to stop long ago)

I pick Last Christmas by whatever pop tart covered it a few years back. I'm no huge fan of the Wham! version, but it doesn't bother me. This one is gag worthy atrocious (like most pop music of recent years) and should be the target of Krampus.

Prof. Pepperwinkle · 12-06-2016, 06:35 PM

While I love Christmas music more than anyone I know, I do not ever want to hear Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer, All I Want For Christmas Is My Two-Front Teeth, I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas or many other Novelty songs that should have died out a year or two after they were released.

CheshireKat · 12-06-2016, 06:39 PM

I missed the edit window - since the Chipmunks' song is probably considered a novelty song, I second Jingle Bell Rock.

commasense · 12-06-2016, 06:40 PM

All of them!

Except for Vince Guaraldi's Linus and Lucy, because it's not a Christmas song!

SCAdian · 12-06-2016, 07:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness

Little Drummer Boy by anybody.

If there's a good version of this one, I haven't heard it. And yes, that includes Bing and Bowie, and Joan Jett's versions.

This!!!

Not that I'm all that fond of Xmas in the first place....

dracoi · 12-06-2016, 07:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Two Many Cats

Jingle Bell Rock has always been vomitous, in my opinion.

This is my first thought. It's only rock to people who would prefer Sinatra... and I actually see on Wikipedia that it originally charted as a country & western song.

Xema · 12-06-2016, 07:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TBG

I pick Last Christmas by whatever pop tart covered it a few years back.

Preach it.

RivkahChaya · 12-06-2016, 07:15 PM

If I never hear that dumb "dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made it out of clay," again, it'll be too soon. No Jewish people actually sing that song at Hanukkah. The sole purpose of this song is to be a token for elementary school music teachers to stick in the "Holiday" pageant that includes 11 Christmas songs, and one rendition of "The Dreidel Song."

dracoi · 12-06-2016, 07:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WOOKINPANUB

I've been meaning to ask where this fucking ear poison came from. Is it from a movie or something? It feels like it's supposed to sound retro but I'm sure I would have heard it before. Fuck off; hippopotamus girl. I hope you get one and it sits on you.

If it helps... it was sung by a real child, and dates back to the 50's when it was released like any other single back then. So it's authentically childish and authentically retro... but still fucking ear poison.

Trancephalic · 12-06-2016, 07:24 PM

The only xmas song i like by my usual standards is Carol of the Bells, although I'm only familiar with the instrumental version and just found out it has lyrics--copyrighted no less!

Personal · 12-06-2016, 07:42 PM

Really, anything sung by Burl Ives. I don't know what it is about that man, but I can't stand him.

And, yeah, the cover of Last Christmas is hideous.

Ulf the Unwashed · 12-06-2016, 07:53 PM

All of them? Can I say that??

Perhaps especially little drummer boy, jingle bell rock, that dogs barking thing, and that incredibly annoying upbeat sleighbells one – I think you know what I'm talking about.

Chefguy · 12-06-2016, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness

Little Drummer Boy by anybody.

If there's a good version of this one, I haven't heard it. And yes, that includes Bing and Bowie, and Joan Jett's versions.

The only version I like of that song is the one where it's performed as a mix with Bolero, which is fairly entertaining.

Biffy the Elephant Shrew · 12-06-2016, 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dracoi

If it helps... it was sung by a real child, and dates back to the 50's when it was released like any other single back then. So it's authentically childish and authentically retro... but still fucking ear poison.

I've always loved it myself, but then for years I knew it only as a weird old song that I'd hear once a year, if that, on the Dr. Demento show. I always assumed it was an obscurity and was surprised to learn that it was actually a hit in the '50s. I think its latter-day revival stems from its use in a 1998 Christmas episode of Ally McBeal.

Now "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" should never have existed and needs to be banned forever.

E-DUB · 12-06-2016, 08:24 PM

Feliz Navidad made it so Jose Feliciano never had to work again and that's OK with me. More a novelty song but I count it as a good holiday season if I get through without hearing "Snoopy and the Red Baron Christmas"

And as for the "Little Drummer Boy", you could have given him the effing drum, you moron.

hogarth · 12-06-2016, 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Personal

And, yeah, the cover of Last Christmas is hideous.

..."the" cover of Last Christmas?

Last year I went to a mall and I heard Last Christmas played four times by three different artists in the span of two hours. Yeesh.

blondebear · 12-06-2016, 08:42 PM

I've hated Silent Night ever since being subjected to Jay North's awful rendition on Dennis The Menace.

BrotherCadfael · 12-06-2016, 09:04 PM

Pretty much any of the secular carols. Not because they are secular, because they SUCK!

Happy Lendervedder · 12-06-2016, 09:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Personal

And, yeah, the cover of Last Christmas is hideous.

Does this mean you actually enjoy the original?

Lumpy · 12-06-2016, 09:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chefguy

Feliz Navidad, may it and its author burn in hell for a million years.

This one is WAAY overplayed because, you know, diversity. And I hate all Mexican brass music enough that I'd support a global embargo on copper to Mexico.

Personal · 12-06-2016, 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hogarth

..."the" cover of Last Christmas?

Last year I went to a mall and I heard Last Christmas played four times by three different artists in the span of two hours. Yeesh.

That's funny. Truly had no idea.

Personal · 12-06-2016, 09:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Happy Lendervedder

Does this mean you actually enjoy the original?

One of a few Wham songs I like, and I don't remember it being overplayed when it was released. I hear it more often now.

RandMcnally · 12-06-2016, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TBG

I pick Last Christmas by whatever pop tart covered it a few years back. I'm no huge fan of the Wham! version, but it doesn't bother me. This one is gag worthy atrocious (like most pop music of recent years) and should be the target of Krampus.

You're going to have to be more specific than that...

The song I hate above all others is "Christmas Time is Here." I have to change the station whenever it's on. I loathe it.

panache45 · 12-06-2016, 11:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RivkahChaya

If I never hear that dumb "dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made it out of clay," again, it'll be too soon. No Jewish people actually sing that song at Hanukkah. The sole purpose of this song is to be a token for elementary school music teachers to stick in the "Holiday" pageant that includes 11 Christmas songs, and one rendition of "The Dreidel Song."

This. I mean, THIS!!! I think it was better when I was a kid, and there was no attempt at diversity.

At least no one has come up with "Hanukkah Shoes."

drad dog · 12-07-2016, 12:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RandMcnally

You're going to have to be more specific than that...

The song I hate above all others is "Christmas Time is Here." I have to change the station whenever it's on. I loathe it.

You really mean Vince Guaraldi's tune from Charlie Brown?

TriPolar · 12-07-2016, 12:11 AM

I could stand most of those once a year. The second time turns the Christmas season into a time of evil and violent desires.

Biotop · 12-07-2016, 12:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness

Little Drummer Boy by anybody.

If there's a good version of this one, I haven't heard it. And yes, that includes Bing and Bowie, and Joan Jett's versions.

Then you have not heard this one!

Little Drummer Boy by corporal blossom.

Biotop · 12-07-2016, 12:16 AM

"Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree" is the very definition of what is wrong with Christmas music.

Starving Artist · 12-07-2016, 12:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hogarth

My least favourite Xmas song of all time is probably "I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas". That fake "widdle kid" singing just puts my teeth on edge.

That song was sung by a 10-year-old girl named Gayla Peevey. I like it mostly because of the hearty, full-throated way she belts it out. Pretty damn good singing for a 10-year-old kid.

kenobi 65 · 12:44 AM

Not what I'd call "standards", but these get played a lot on the pop stations that go to all-Christmas formats, and they are *not* Christmas songs:

Last Christmas (Wham!, and any and all covers)
Same Old Lang Syne (Dan Fogelberg)
My Favorite Things (from The Sound of Music)

Also, while it's a Christmas song, "Wonderful Christmastime," by Paul McCartney, needs to just go away, because it's an awful song.