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Old 05-17-2019, 09:26 PM
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There was...something...in my beer.


I was enjoying being outside. Until this...abomination crawled in my beer and I almost drank it. It WAS in my mouth briefly. WtFis it?

(Crossposting at Giraffe since I can can upload a photo there)

http://www.giraffeboards.com/showthr...19#post1525019
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.

Last edited by snfaulkner; 05-17-2019 at 09:27 PM.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:30 PM
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Omg. I would be still puking. How the heck did that happen?
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:32 PM
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Originally Posted by Beckdawrek View Post
Omg. I would be still puking. How the heck did that happen?
I dunno. I was only outside with an open beer for maybe 15-20 min. I was distracted by seeing a firefly for the first time in 20ish yrs. Is it better or worse if it was in there from the factory?
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:35 PM
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I immediately went to a bar and ordered a bourbon straight to kill off germs...and feelings...and memories.
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:42 PM
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I don't know if you have a slug there, but beer attracts slugs.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snfaulkner View Post
I was enjoying being outside. Until this...abomination crawled in my beer and I almost drank it. It WAS in my mouth briefly. WtFis it?

(Crossposting at Giraffe since I can can upload a photo there)

http://www.giraffeboards.com/showthr...19#post1525019
You have to register there and log in to see the image, apparently, so it would be better to post it on some site where you don't have to do that.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:47 PM
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I don't know if you have a slug there, but beer attracts slugs.
Evidently. I think it's a leach. Like that scarring scene from Stand By Me.
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:48 PM
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I immediately went to a bar and ordered a bourbon straight to kill off germs...and feelings...and memories.
That is exactly what I would do. Maybe chase it with some GermX.
You may have ptsd, get therapy, quick.

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 05-17-2019 at 09:50 PM.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:52 PM
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You have to register there and log in to see the image, apparently, so it would be better to post it on some site where you don't have to do that.
That's yarbles. But thanks for the heads up. I'm already three bourbons in so I ain't gonna sign up for anything else right now. So until tomorrow, let's just say that it is like an inch long grey, segmented worm like leachy thing. Beck, back me up here.
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 09:59 PM
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I linked directly to the image. You should be able to see it now.

http://www.giraffeboards.com/attachm...8&d=1558145855
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:00 PM
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That's... Horrifying.
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:03 PM
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That's... Horrifying.
It...is. it really really is. I'll be complaining about it for many weeks/months/yrs, I'm sure.
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:04 PM
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I linked directly to the image. You should be able to see it now.

http://www.giraffeboards.com/attachm...8&d=1558145855
Thankee, kind sir.
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:04 PM
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I linked directly to the image. You should be able to see it now.

http://www.giraffeboards.com/attachm...8&d=1558145855
Nope, still goes to the log-in page.
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:05 PM
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I linked directly to the image. You should be able to see it now.

http://www.giraffeboards.com/attachm...8&d=1558145855
Nope. Says you have to be logged in to see it. Not gonna happen.
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:25 PM
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Nope. Says you have to be logged in to see it. Not gonna happen.
I dont blame you. I'll try and remember to make an upload where everyone can share my horror tomorrow. Although I'm doing my best to never remember right now.
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:27 PM
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It's truly gross.
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Old 05-17-2019, 10:47 PM
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whimmy wham-wham wozzel!
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old 05-17-2019, 11:09 PM
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Nope. Says you have to be logged in to see it. Not gonna happen.
Funny. I made sure I was logged out when I tested it. Oh, well.

Last edited by cochrane; 05-17-2019 at 11:10 PM.
  #20  
Old Yesterday, 01:09 AM
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It's truly gross.
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Originally Posted by snfaulkner View Post
I dunno. The blond is kinda hot.
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Old Yesterday, 07:00 AM
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Last year on our pontoon boat I took a swig of my beer and immediately knew something was amiss. I spit out the mouthful and out came a bee! It took a moment to get its shit together, then flew off.
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Old Yesterday, 08:29 AM
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Last year on our pontoon boat I took a swig of my beer and immediately knew something was amiss. I spit out the mouthful and out came a bee! It took a moment to get its shit together, then flew off.
You mean you let him leave? He was FUI.
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Old Yesterday, 09:09 AM
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See, I was thinking more along the lines of this. snfaulkner may have just saved the planet.
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Old Yesterday, 10:54 AM
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I was actually thinking of the worms in Fry's truck stop sandwich that rewired his brain.
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Old Yesterday, 05:34 PM
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So snfaulkner, did it drink much?
If itd been a fly and you were Irish and in a joke, youd have grabbed the fly by the wings and yelled Spit it out, ya little bastard, spit it out!
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Old Yesterday, 06:10 PM
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I linked directly to the image. You should be able to see it now.

http://www.giraffeboards.com/attachm...8&d=1558145855
I'm still getting the log in page. I want to see the parasite you ingested.
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Old Yesterday, 06:46 PM
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I can't see the picture, but I'm sure you'll be fine.

***WARNING***STORY ABOUT EATING A BUG FOLLOWS***
SQUEAMISH PEOPLE BEWARE


I once camped out someplace that had beetles (or beetle-like bugs, I'm no entomologist) that were known to fly into one's food. Usually the solution was to pick them out as soon as you saw them, but somehow one of them escaped my notice and got into my mouth. I thought something was amiss after I felt a *CRUNCH* between my teeth. Then I tasted something entirely unlike the fried rice on my plate. Then I felt the little fcuker flapping it's wings in my mouth. Being a stubborn Yankee bastard, I couldn't admit defeat by spitting it out. So I chewed furiously and swallowed! The taste in my mouth was indescribably awful. A fork full of (untainted) fried rice and a whole cup of water didn't get it out, so I went with the nuclear option. Nowadays that would be strong liquor, but being a child I went with several spoons-full of hot sauce. And here I am, [mumble mumble] years later with nothing but a gross story to tell from it. And you had liquor to help with your thing! You'll be fine.
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Old Yesterday, 06:48 PM
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I can confirm that the thing would have wrapped itself around your cerebral cortex, and rendered you highly susceptible to suggestion. I saw a documentary about those things once.
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Old Yesterday, 07:08 PM
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I'm still getting the log in page. I want to see the parasite you ingested.
There was no parasite. The photo page that you can't reach does not exist. This was all just a simple little mistake. We've had a little talk with snfaulkner, and he now agrees that there was never any brain-controlling parasite in his beer, and there was no photo, and everyone should just forget the whole thing. And if you hear any more stories over the next few weeks about people finding things like this in their beverages, just ignore them too. It will all be over soon.
  #30  
Old Yesterday, 07:17 PM
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Ok good, I was worried for a while. Are we still meeting at the San Francisco city hall tomorrow morning?
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Sometimes I doubt your commitment to sparkle motion

Last edited by Wesley Clark; Yesterday at 07:17 PM.
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Old Yesterday, 07:17 PM
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I still think he may have PTSD. Delusional thinking is a symptom. We should intervene. It would be a kindness, really.
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Old Yesterday, 09:19 PM
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Needs official thread song.
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Old Yesterday, 10:10 PM
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Hopefully, snfaulkner doesn't object to me relocating the image to imgur.

https://imgur.com/esLOQXl
  #34  
Old Yesterday, 10:25 PM
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Hopefully, snfaulkner doesn't object to me relocating the image to imgur.

https://imgur.com/esLOQXl
Thank you. 33 posts and it was finally posted for those of us not registered on giraffe boards.

Its not that disgusting. Theres no spikes or green spots on it.
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  #35  
Old Yesterday, 10:25 PM
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Hopefully, snfaulkner doesn't object to me relocating the image to imgur.

https://imgur.com/esLOQXl
Nope! I appreciate it. Thanks!
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It may be because I'm a drooling simpleton with the attention span of a demented gnat, but would you mind explaining everything in words of one syllable. 140 chars max.
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Old Yesterday, 11:16 PM
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Now if it was soup we were talking about..............

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  #37  
Old Yesterday, 11:33 PM
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Hopefully, snfaulkner doesn't object to me relocating the image to imgur.

https://imgur.com/esLOQXl
Thank you. It looks like a slug to me, with its eyestalks retracted from being in the alcohol.

Slugs love beer, and beer traps are sometimes used to get rid of them in gardens.
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Old Yesterday, 11:35 PM
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Maybe it was just the inside of escargot. Yep, that's the ticket, pretend you were eating fancy French food. (Ewww, snails.I'm still gaggy)

Last edited by Beckdawrek; Yesterday at 11:35 PM.
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Old Today, 09:26 AM
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Exactly. Slugs and snails are both gastropods. That thing would probably have been delicious with melted garlic butter. Yumm! You should have been charged extra for it!

OK, I'll go away now. I think I need to throw up anyway.
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