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Old 12-04-2019, 01:21 PM
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Bitlife; an amusing casual mobile game


I’ve been messing around with Bitlife, and while it’s no serious hardcore game, it is an amusing little casual diversion, it’s basically an extremely simplified mostly text-based Sims...

You control a “Bitizen” from birth to death, making all the choices in their life, and have to live with the results of your decisions...

The thing that makes it more addictive then the typical casual game is that you can carry your family line down multiple generations (in the unlocked version), my MacTech family is already on the fourth generation, with a rich history of everything from decorated military members, to rich media tycoons, a convict, and at least one rather.... promiscuous Bitizen....

A couple family members met sad early fates, others have done well

You can hail from any country, and it takes into account name spellings, societal makeup (Great Britain has free health care, USA does not) the middle eastern world frowns on SSM (and yes Gay/Straight/Bi are all available options), you can adopt/adopt out kids, artificial insemination, you can cheat on your significant other, or stay loyal, STDs are a factor in “hook ups”, crime ranging from pickpocketing to murder is available, drugs/crime/smuggling and prison can be possible...

It’s actually a pretty immersive sandbox

My next family?
Jason Voorhees, and he’s going to be played just like the character, heck,,when family members pass, he’ll even select the option to Taxidermy them and display them in his home! (Yes, actually an option!)
__________________
Freakazoid> dumb, Dumb, DUMB!, NEVER tell the villain how to trap you in a cage!
Gutierrez> You probably shouldn't have helped us build it either...
F!> I know, DUMB!

Last edited by MacTech; 12-04-2019 at 01:23 PM.
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Old 12-04-2019, 01:35 PM
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Also, you can add your own town (it really only factors in in school/business names), and add in custom people (you can add them from your phone’s contact list if you like)

Never hooked up with your school crush? Have a co-worker you fancy? Infatuated with a celebrity? Have a politician you loathe and want to ruin their life? They can be in the game....

Hmm, gotta add some more torture-families...

Donald Trump, Francis O’Rourke, Hillary Clinton, Dianne Feinstein, and Bill Gates, you’re on my Naughty List...

Professor Stephen Hawking, Douglas Adams, Steve Jobs, Terry Pratchett, Jim Henson, Leonard Nimoy, you’re all going to live a pampered life...
__________________
Freakazoid> dumb, Dumb, DUMB!, NEVER tell the villain how to trap you in a cage!
Gutierrez> You probably shouldn't have helped us build it either...
F!> I know, DUMB!

Last edited by MacTech; 12-04-2019 at 01:35 PM.
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Old 12-04-2019, 02:47 PM
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Jason Voorheesís Bitlife;
He made every bad decision possible, fought with everyone, yet still stayed at school, and his parents gave him a 2 year old Mercedes C-Class when he passed his driving test.

He graduated high school, and his parents paid for his entire college education, he majored in Biology (somehow appropriate here ) got a part time job as a Lab Assistant in college

His parents divorced when he was 19, and got his first crush, Raven Daniels, she got pregnant on their first date, they had a daughter, Autumn

He attacked his stepfather when his mom re-married, he bought the best lawyers and was found Not Guilty of Assault

Raven got pregnant again, they had a baby, Jim

Jasonís first job is a dental hygienist

Pregnant again! (Jasonís a randy bastard...)

(Plotline, Iíve decided to start Jasonís killing spree when he turns 30, at which point heíll also start cheating on his girlfriend, they havenít gotten married yet..., remember, this IS Jason Voorhees weíre talking about, heís not the nicest guy, or most upstanding citizen, heís already assaulted his stepfather and was a school bully....)

*ALERT! * Jasonís girlfriend just gave birth to TRIPLETS!!! , at 23 years old, the two of them are unwed parents and have FIVE kids!

The killing spree is 7 years away...

Triplets names; Natalie, Nakita, Nicole

Weíre pregnant *AGAIN!* at 23, geez, keep it in your pants already, Jason!), maybe your last name should be Duggar!?!

Welcome baby Shauna Voorhees to this psychotic brood....

Jasonís father just came out as bisexual, Jason argues with him and doesnít accept this, as heís a jerk... Jason is now 26, the killing spree is now 4 years away, might this be a factor? Who will support his kids when he finally goes crazy?*

* the game doesnít permit you to switch players mid game, so I couldnít switch to Raven anyway...

28, and pregnant girlfriend *AGAIN*... Meet Sarah Voorhees!

29 years old, ONE YEAR till the killing spree...

Itís been 30 years, time to start killing!

To be continued, if thereís any interest

Link to the Reddit thread so you can see some of the goofy humor
https://www.reddit.com/r/bitlife/
__________________
Freakazoid> dumb, Dumb, DUMB!, NEVER tell the villain how to trap you in a cage!
Gutierrez> You probably shouldn't have helped us build it either...
F!> I know, DUMB!
  #4  
Old 12-05-2019, 12:18 PM
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I downloaded it. Itís free to try so why not. Iíll chime in after I get a chance to play.
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Old 12-05-2019, 02:46 PM
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I *LOATHE* "Freemium" games, the free version is seriously neutered, they serve up ads for any more "advanced" interaction, and you can only play *one* generation (maybe two, but nothing beyond that

you have two paid options, for $1.99, you can eliminate the ads, but all the higher level options are still locked out, for $4.99, you unlock the entire game including"special features", like no limit on the number of generations, the ability to purchase exotic pets (I've owned tigers, leopards, boa constrictors, wildcats, wolves.....) and a bunch of other features

I paid the $4.99, it's worth it, the MacTech family is 11 generations old by now, working on 12th, 516 year family history and worth $16 million
__________________
Freakazoid> dumb, Dumb, DUMB!, NEVER tell the villain how to trap you in a cage!
Gutierrez> You probably shouldn't have helped us build it either...
F!> I know, DUMB!

Last edited by MacTech; 12-05-2019 at 02:48 PM.
  #6  
Old 12-05-2019, 03:47 PM
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I’ll probably go the $5 route if it hooks me. That’s not too much for a good mobile game; I’ve paid more for others in the past. We’ll see. I’m at work now so not in a position to fiddle with it, probably tonight.
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