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Old 11-28-2019, 02:07 PM
Les Espaces Du Sommeil's Avatar
Les Espaces Du Sommeil is offline
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Women Dopers - How Do you Read this Situation ?


Sorry, rambling post.

In the past month, I’ve spent a lot of time with a new female colleague. I had begun to think that she was showing some romantic interest in me. Now, it seems that I was wrong about it, but I really don’t know what to think.

She’s dropped by office almost daily since the beginning of this month. At first, she always had a legitimate professional reason to see me. It was always resolved in a matter of minutes but she would stay and chat with me for a long time afterwards. We would talk about our respective childhoods, studies and families. And laugh. A lot. She would always wait until the very last moment before a meeting to leave my office, blushing and bumping into things while doing so.

As the weeks passed, she stayed longer and longer and talked about a whole lot of very intimate things. As a matter of fact, she’s come to my office every single day this week, occasionally 2-3 times on the same day. None of her recent visits had anything to do with work. I reckon that in the past 4 days, we must have spent at least 6-7 (working) hours chatting and laughing. She has always been the one initiating contact, to the point where other colleagues started noticing.

She showed me pictures of trips with her parents on our very first conversation, mentioned that I wasn’t old at all when I remarked that I had almost 12 years on her, suggested a present for my birthday, marvelled at all the things we have in common and thanked me repeatedly for our "nice" conversations. When she heard that my mother tongue was French, she asked if it was ok if we spoke French together for her to practice (turns out she’s almost perfectly fluent). When I told her that I reacted differently depending on the language I used, she said that we should revert to English because she had to know « the other LEDS ». And did I mention that we laughed a lot ? After I few days like this I suggested we meet outside of work. She blushed again, seemed embarrassed (but not offended) and ended up saying « It depends on when ».

Over the weeks, I’ve tried to determine whether there was someone in her life. She mentioned that she was thinking of buying a flat… with her sisters. She’s had some serious health issues and said that her sisters were helping her with groceries and household chores. She stays at work until really late and comes even at times when she could work from home. No mention of a boyfriend, ever - although I did notice that she wore inconsistently something that could have been an engagement ring.

But then, a couple of hours ago, as she was talking about some serious issue she’s encountered at work, she mentioned that she « had someone ». I asked her what that « someone » thought of the situation she was describing and she flatly said « I don’t want to talk about him ». That was the first time she refused to talk to me about a particular subject. I respected her wish but I was shattered.

So women dopers, how do you read this ? See a colleague for hours at the time over weeks, share extremely intimate details, miss dozens of obvious opportunities to talk about your fiancé and then refuse to talk about him after mentioning his existence almost by accident? I’m at a loss.
__________________
Mais je porte accroché au plus haut des entrailles
À la place où la foudre a frappé trop souvent
Un cœur où chaque mot a laissé son entaille
Et d’où ma vie s’égoutte au moindre mouvement

Last edited by Les Espaces Du Sommeil; 11-28-2019 at 02:11 PM.
 

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