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Old 07-06-2019, 07:41 AM
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Describe your favorite greeting card


Christmas, birthday, anniversary, sweet, touching, snarky, whatever. If you can find a picture, so much the better.

Best friend gave me a Xmas card (early 1980s) with something like this on it. I plotzed.
  #2  
Old 07-06-2019, 08:49 AM
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I used to work in a Hallmark store during grad school, so I remember quite a few. I'll have more of them as I remember them, but one of the ones I remember most was an anniversary card from husband to wife:

Me big caveman.
Live alone.
Have big TV.
Sit on stone.

Life seem happy,
Then one day...
Me see new thing.
Brain go "HEY!"

Her not dirty...
Her not gritty...
Me confused.
Her smell pretty.

Brain go "ping!"
Heart go "knock!"
Me give girl-thing
Pretty rock.

Now me have-um happy life!
It feel perfect! Me love wife!
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Old 07-06-2019, 09:22 AM
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"Money is tight,
times are hard,
so here's your fucking
christmas card."

Verse on a handmade xmas card.
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Old 07-06-2019, 09:27 AM
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I always loved the Peanuts card where Lucy says "Happy 40th Birthday." And Linus says "Come on, nobody lives to be that old."
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Old 07-06-2019, 10:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kayaker View Post
"Money is tight,
times are hard,
so here's your fucking
christmas card."

Verse on a handmade xmas card.
You saved me the trouble of posting. Saw that card in a grocery store, but for a birthday. Appropriate for any occasion, IMHO.

Last edited by burpo the wonder mutt; 07-06-2019 at 10:44 AM.
  #6  
Old 07-06-2019, 01:31 PM
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My husband sent me a card once that said, "Eat, Sleep, Think of you. It's a hectic life." That's the one that immediately leapt to mind.
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Old 07-06-2019, 01:58 PM
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I sent one to my aunt. Had a cartoon pic of a woman in bed with a colorful Mohawk and piercings. Inside it said: I heard you’re feeling punk!
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Old 07-07-2019, 09:23 PM
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My dad once gave my mom a card with this image.

The inside text read:
SPOILER:
Here's to another exciting year.
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Old 07-08-2019, 04:51 AM
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My favorite postcard. It was given to me by my first girlfriend, whom I loved very much. I broke up with the girl, but I still have a postcard.
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Old 07-08-2019, 08:04 AM
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The image was of a dog being scared by a women with a vacuum cleaner, and the caption inside was "Just trying to avoid things that suck".
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Old 07-08-2019, 09:00 AM
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Can't find it online, but I remember a Christmas card that showed a cat wearing a Santa hat, looking smugly at the camera. The caption was, "Fluffy listened very carefully to what all the mice wanted for Christmas, and then he ate them."
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Old 07-08-2019, 09:37 AM
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I have one that I've saved for years. Now I take a picture of it and text it, because I don't want to part with it. It's a New Yorker cartoon. Not sure what occasion it's for.

A simple line drawing. Man standing in front of his refrigerator. A note is stuck on it. The note says:

Pick up cleaning
Pay bills
Forge in the smithy of my soul the uncreated conscience of my race
Call mom

The caption is: James Joyce's refrigerator

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Old 07-08-2019, 11:24 AM
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My favorite is a Christmas card I bought in 1980 at a store in a mall in Ames, Iowa.

A drawing of a blue and white interstate road sign on the front saying:

Bethlehem - 2 miles

Food

Gas

No Lodging

The inside just said "Merry Christmas", or something as far as I can remember.
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Old 07-08-2019, 11:42 AM
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Birthday card: Front says "The gang got together and decided to send you this card."

On the inside you've got a guy standing in front of a group making marks on a chalkboard with the two possibilities being "card" and "gift".
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Old 07-08-2019, 12:34 PM
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One of my favorite birthday cards (the text inside is in the gray box on the right): https://www.papercards.com/products/...ard-avanti.asp
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Old 07-08-2019, 05:08 PM
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My SO gave me a card that said "I love you with my whole ass" on the front. On the inside it said "It is bigger than my heart"
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Old 07-08-2019, 06:08 PM
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I had surgery a couple of months ago. I had kind of a rough time in the hospital.

A couple of days after I got home, a cousin sent me a get-well card with a photo of a forlorn-looking dog with one of those plastic cones around his neck.

I laughed harder than I had in weeks.
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Old 07-08-2019, 09:42 PM
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Somewhere in the distant past, I started giving my immediate family cards at Christmas that had nothing to do with Christmas but everything to do with them. At first I had to find the right card during the year (with no connection to any special occasion). Then one day it occurred to me to look at the back of the card and do some googling. Since then, I just look through the website in November and order what I pick out.

My sister's favorite card is this one (she not only has a dog that looks exactly like this one, but he is convinced he can't swim!)

http://www.funnyandtrue.com/Cards/Al...-Card_278.html

But my favorite is one I gave copies of to both my sisters at the same time. In many ways, it sums up their childhood.

http://www.funnyandtrue.com/Cards/Al...ard-701_2.html
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Old 07-08-2019, 10:46 PM
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A couple of Hallmark Shoebox Christmas cards:

Cartoon of Three Wise Men/Three Kings traveling by camel to Bethlehem, with caption underneath: "It's rarely smooth sailing when three Kings travel together." The kings' dialogue: "I wanna ride up front!" "Yeah! Who died and made YOU king?" "My dad."

Dasher putting the moves on a pretty doe in a bar: "Yeah...I'm a pilot."

And one for Halloween:

"Halloween on the Starship Enterprise." A photo of the bridge crew with superimposed thought balloons over every crew member (except, of course, Spock):

"Think I'll get a pair of pointy ears and go as Spock."
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Last edited by Hermione; 07-08-2019 at 10:46 PM.
  #20  
Old 07-08-2019, 11:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hermione View Post
A couple of Hallmark Shoebox Christmas cards:

Cartoon of Three Wise Men/Three Kings traveling by camel to Bethlehem....
I got this Far Side cartoon as a card for Christmas a few years ago, and it's still a favorite: http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-kSxcG-jRxb...Far%2Bside.jpg
  #21  
Old 07-09-2019, 11:06 AM
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My favorite of ones we sent out is the Far Side card with Santa and reindeer splattered on the nose of a 747.

Favorite one we received: Jesus is a bartender in a classic bartender pose with cocktail shaker in hand a a huge smile. Girl in party dress is sprawled across the bar reaching out her glass saying "Jesus Christ I need a drink." Inside the card is a list of Jesus' favorite drink recipes (along the lines of "For red wine: Fill glass with tap water, wave hands over the top.")
  #22  
Old 07-09-2019, 11:21 AM
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I don't remember the exact wording, but my sister found one a few years ago which had a picture of a (presumably) Eastern European old lady complete with babushka saying "Many birthday wishes to you!" and on the inside it read "Birthday wish is fun tradition. I wish for goat. Does goat come? No."
  #23  
Old 07-09-2019, 11:30 AM
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My favorite, for a long time, is this belated birthday card.

https://alvinalexander.com/photos/co...crap-was-today
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  #24  
Old 07-09-2019, 11:42 AM
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The front of the card shows a typical, overweight middle-aged couple. Inside it says: "Happy Birthday from the High Queen of Glamor and her Jungle Stud".

Madame P.'s favorite is a get well card. On the front is a bird walking on a crutch and wearing an assortment of bandages. The inside reads: "Who said a little pussy never hurt anyone?"
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Old 07-10-2019, 10:10 AM
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My mother got a card for her older sister's 40th birthday that said "You're 40!" on the front. Inside it said:
SPOILER:
"...and I'm not."
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  #26  
Old 07-11-2019, 02:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by garygnu View Post
My mother got a card for her older sister's 40th birthday that said "You're 40!" on the front. Inside it said:
SPOILER:
"...and I'm not."
I got a similar card from my younger sister:
Happy 30th Birthday!

Now you are old.

Another gem from my sweet sister:
Happy Birthday to the most wonderful sister in the world!

Mom made me say that.
(Don't laugh. She's going to make you say it me on my birthday.)

One of my all-time favorites is the Sandra Boynton "Hippo Birdie Two Ewes" card.
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