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  #101  
Old 02-15-2019, 09:59 AM
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Originally Posted by Sangahyando View Post
This, in non-serious discourse -- so, not in the spirit of most of the thread; but, "I resemble that remark". In my opinion, the most feeble and pointless bit of wordplay in the entire history of the English language.
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Originally Posted by Ulf the Unwashed View Post
Yeah, gotta admit that never was funny to me either. Wasn’t it a Groucho Marx line? That might explain it. “An accepted wit has but to say ‘Pass the mustard’ and they burst their ribs with laughter”
Most famously spoken by Jerome Lester Horowitz.
  #102  
Old 02-15-2019, 10:44 AM
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Any post that starts with “all polls are rigged“ or “all studies are fake“.
  #103  
Old 02-15-2019, 11:42 AM
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"Here's a link to a youtube video/podcast that explains my position perfectly:"
  #104  
Old 02-15-2019, 11:44 AM
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Anything that invokes epigenetics or quantum theory to explain explain anything other than epigenetics or quantum theory.
  #105  
Old 02-15-2019, 12:19 PM
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Originally Posted by Riemann View Post
Anything that invokes epigenetics or quantum theory to explain explain anything other than epigenetics or quantum theory.
“According to Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle,” <quantum principle extended to social circumstance>
  #106  
Old 02-15-2019, 12:47 PM
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Originally Posted by Aspidistra View Post
"disruption"
*curate*

If I go grocery shopping and actually think about what I buy instead of grabbing random crap off the shelves and tossing it willy-nilly into my cart, I am the proud owner of“ a carefully curated selection of foodstuffs”. Like I’m somehow the equivalent of the guy who decides what to hang on the walls of the Met museum.
  #107  
Old 02-15-2019, 12:59 PM
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"I'm a Libertarian..." Nope, don't care about your opinion. You're telling me your beliefs center about a model of government that has never been tried and never will be tried by any nation and is offensive to my morality.

"Democrat Party" Juvenile attempt at a slur.

"Sadly, only 3% will share this. Should be 100%" It would be if everyone agreed with you.


"Bet I won't get one share". But you already did share it, imbecile.

"{Person You Like} DESTROYS {Person You Dislike}" No, only if you agree with it.

"Both Sides Do It!" No, they don't.
  #108  
Old 02-15-2019, 09:07 PM
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"It is what it is."

"Hurry! This offer won't last!"

"LOL!" - writer responding to his/her own comment.

"You just have to have faith that...."

"Are you....?" - fill in religious denomination of your choice.

Anything that mentions a current dance craze, TV show or celebrity (some exceptions apply, but not many).
  #109  
Old 02-15-2019, 10:18 PM
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Originally Posted by commasense View Post
Most famously spoken by Jerome Lester Horowitz.
Ah, okay, did not know that. Thought it was Marx; ignorance fought.

My overall point still stands, though--it's said by someone widely thought of as funny, therefore the line itself must be funny. 9Or maybe it really is funny, and I've just never had it cooked the right way. So to speak.)
  #110  
Old 02-15-2019, 10:57 PM
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Originally Posted by BobLibDem View Post
"I'm a Libertarian..." Nope, don't care about your opinion. You're telling me your beliefs center about a model of government that has never been tried and never will be tried by any nation and is offensive to my morality.
Especially if they worship "herb."

Speaking of which, anything suggesting that marijuana is the cure-all for every disease known to man makes me stop reading, as does anything which endorses essential oils for any reason other than making something smell or taste better.
  #111  
Old 02-16-2019, 12:07 AM
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Originally Posted by nearwildheaven View Post
Which reminds me: "preggers" or "baby bump" in the context of a pregnant public figure.
Somewhat related: "baby mama" or "baby daddy." It is bad enough that those people used to be called husband or wife, but it seems awfully dismissive to me of another person with whom you are raising a child.
  #112  
Old 02-16-2019, 09:04 AM
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Presenting a belief as a fact. I KNOW THERE IS A GOD. No, you believe it. There's no way of knowing it.

People who confuse beliefs with facts can be the most dangerous people in the world.
  #113  
Old 02-16-2019, 10:06 AM
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Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas View Post
Presenting a belief as a fact. I KNOW THERE IS A GOD. No, you believe it. There's no way of knowing it.

People who confuse beliefs with facts can be the most dangerous people in the world.
I agree with your point, but I think your example is bad. People who say such a thing are implying a belief. Nobody states a fact in a manner such as "I KNOW THAT THERE IS A CITY IN FRANCE CALLED PARIS!!!"

The statement you cited, fairly construed, means "I believe strongly there is a god, even though others may disbelieve."
  #114  
Old 02-16-2019, 10:13 AM
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I think Annie-Xmas has it right. I know a lot of people for whom "I know there is God" is exactly the same thing as "I know there is a city in France named Paris." They do totally mean that they KNOW it.
  #115  
Old 02-16-2019, 11:32 AM
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Right. I've talked to anti-abortion protestors who tell me they know there is a God because EVERYBODY knows it. Disbelievers are suppressing that truth that everybody KNOWS.

And we are all going to have to stand before him (always HIM) and give an account of our sins when we die. They know it.
  #116  
Old 02-16-2019, 12:47 PM
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Originally Posted by UltraVires View Post
Somewhat related: "baby mama" or "baby daddy." It is bad enough that those people used to be called husband or wife, but it seems awfully dismissive to me of another person with whom you are raising a child.
Does anyone actually say those words except as a joke of some kind?
  #117  
Old 02-16-2019, 01:36 PM
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Originally Posted by Procrustus View Post
Does anyone actually say those words except as a joke of some kind?
Oh, absolutely. Especially young millenials and lower class (can't think of a better term right now) people.
  #118  
Old 02-16-2019, 07:46 PM
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"Political correctness." The number 1 most pernicious thought-stopping cliché nowadays.
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Originally Posted by F. U. Shakespeare View Post
Agreed. Same thing with 'political correctness'.
Even though you beat me to it, I had to say it.

Any of those evo-psych just-so stories. Especially any use of "hardwired" that doesn't directly concern electronics.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Defensive Indifference View Post
Anyway, I forgot one of the most obvious signs that everyone should stop reading or listening: "I'm not a racist, but..." Yeah, I think I'll save us both some time and just start ignoring you now.
This, absolutely.
  #119  
Old 02-17-2019, 01:01 AM
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Originally Posted by Procrustus View Post
Does anyone actually say those words except as a joke of some kind?
Yes, and almost always as a term of derision.
  #120  
Old 02-17-2019, 10:43 PM
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"for me, personally."

"If I/he/she/you would have known..."
  #121  
Old 02-18-2019, 05:01 AM
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Mention of anything "being forced down our throats."
  #122  
Old 02-18-2019, 05:24 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ulf the Unwashed View Post
Ah, okay, did not know that. Thought it was Marx; ignorance fought.

My overall point still stands, though--it's said by someone widely thought of as funny, therefore the line itself must be funny. Or maybe it really is funny, and I've just never had it cooked the right way. So to speak.)
In the context of the linked-to J.L. Horowitz film clip -- even I felt that to be funny (a little): said by a clearly unsophisticated, vocabularily-challenged guy. It's just that I've heard it ad nauseam from would-be-comedian parrots, I mean folk who mistake coming out with silly, flogged-to-death catchphrases; for wit on their part.

It's a pet peeve of mine, that to be funny, puns need to be "about" something -- just meaningless playing with words, I find feeble and pointless. A one-time associate of mine -- a great devotee of the "resemble" nonsense -- was also fond of talking about "getting a potato clock" (getting up at 8 o'clock), in no context whatever. He thought that side-splitting; I didn't.
  #123  
Old 02-18-2019, 08:03 AM
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"Red pill".

Right, basing your life philosophy on a thing from a 20 year old SF film is going to be really persuasive, kid.
  #124  
Old 02-18-2019, 09:52 AM
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"Game changer".
  #125  
Old 02-18-2019, 01:10 PM
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"Wake up people!!!"

( Exhortation by one tilting at this or that windmill )
  #126  
Old 02-18-2019, 10:01 PM
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Originally Posted by Sangahyando View Post
In the context of the linked-to J.L. Horowitz film clip -- even I felt that to be funny (a little): said by a clearly unsophisticated, vocabularily-challenged guy. It's just that I've heard it ad nauseam from would-be-comedian parrots, I mean folk who mistake coming out with silly, flogged-to-death catchphrases; for wit on their part.

It's a pet peeve of mine, that to be funny, puns need to be "about" something -- just meaningless playing with words, I find feeble and pointless. A one-time associate of mine -- a great devotee of the "resemble" nonsense -- was also fond of talking about "getting a potato clock" (getting up at 8 o'clock), in no context whatever. He thought that side-splitting; I didn't.
Actually I kinda like "getting a potato clock"--the words are similar enough in sound to make it work for me, and the image of a potato clock is absurd enough to make it work as well. I can imagine it gets really tiresome after the eighth repetition, though.

In contrast, "resemble" doesn't closely resemble "resent," and the image of resembling a remark is too much of a stretch for my brain to find it funny. Oh well. Humor--can't live without it, can't explain it.
  #127  
Old 02-19-2019, 09:35 AM
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Anyone who says "men" means "men and women." Not in my world.

There is a perfectly good word that includes both genders. Use it, people.
  #128  
Old 02-20-2019, 03:12 AM
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Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas View Post
Anyone who says "men" means "men and women." Not in my world.

There is a perfectly good word that includes both genders. Use it, people.
"Motherfuckers?"
  #129  
Old 02-20-2019, 07:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas View Post
Right. I've talked to anti-abortion protestors who tell me they know there is a God because EVERYBODY knows it. Disbelievers are suppressing that truth that everybody KNOWS.

And we are all going to have to stand before him (always HIM) and give an account of our sins when we die. They know it.
Damn! I better start keeping a list. I'm liable to forget something.

Like writing "damn!"
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  #130  
Old 02-20-2019, 07:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ulf the Unwashed View Post
Actually I kinda like "getting a potato clock"--the words are similar enough in sound to make it work for me, and the image of a potato clock is absurd enough to make it work as well. I can imagine it gets really tiresome after the eighth repetition, though.

In contrast, "resemble" doesn't closely resemble "resent," and the image of resembling a remark is too much of a stretch for my brain to find it funny. Oh well. Humor--can't live without it, can't explain it.
Potato Clocks. You really can get these:

https://www.real-world-physics-probl...ato-clock.html

https://www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Potato-Clock

https://science.howstuffworks.com/in...tato-clock.htm



Edited to add -- I really had heard of Potato Clocks before this. What I hadn't heard was the pun "getting a potato clock" = "getting up at eight o'clock"
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Last edited by CalMeacham; 02-20-2019 at 07:44 AM.
  #131  
Old 02-20-2019, 12:20 PM
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Does anyone actually say those words except as a joke of some kind?
Yes, people who have or have had multiple partners, and wish to distinguish the biological father or mother of the child from the current attachment. I have heard it used seriously.
  #132  
Old 02-20-2019, 12:27 PM
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Originally Posted by dorvann View Post
Anytime anyone seriously mentions "we only use 10% of our brain" canard.
I opened this thread to post just that.
  #133  
Old 02-20-2019, 12:38 PM
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Any prose or writing that is meant to sound authoritative but is simply flat-out nonsense. I once read a book in which the author claimed - with utter seriousness - that Taiwan was creating a danger for itself by buying 200-some airplanes because those airplanes run a risk of colliding in Taiwan's small space. Bear in mind, the volume of airspace above Taiwan is over 130,000 cubic miles, and any nation with major airports and air travel already has hundreds of airplanes criss-crossing its airspace on any given day. I shut the book right then and there.

Last edited by Velocity; 02-20-2019 at 12:39 PM.
  #134  
Old 02-21-2019, 04:08 PM
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Any prose or writing that is meant to sound authoritative but is simply flat-out nonsense. I once read a book in which the author claimed - with utter seriousness - that Taiwan was creating a danger for itself by buying 200-some airplanes because those airplanes run a risk of colliding in Taiwan's small space. Bear in mind, the volume of airspace above Taiwan is over 130,000 cubic miles, and any nation with major airports and air travel already has hundreds of airplanes criss-crossing its airspace on any given day. I shut the book right then and there.
I recall from a book (read many years ago) of reminiscences by a British airman, of his World War II experiences: the remark that essentially, the air is -- when you're up in it -- mostly a hugely and impressively empty place; even with high incidences of ill-disposed persons greatly wishful of functioning in it, in one way or another, with a view to ruining your day.
  #135  
Old 02-25-2019, 09:34 PM
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Just added one today. People who use "veggie" are inevitably tiresome idiots and the term is a red flag to stop reading immediately.
  #136  
Old 02-25-2019, 09:53 PM
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People who use "veggie" are inevitably tiresome idiots and the term is a red flag to stop reading immediately.
It's even worse than you realize.

Some people on message boards spell "veggies" as "vegees".

The Crisis Continues.
  #137  
Old 02-25-2019, 10:07 PM
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"Red pill".

Right, basing your life philosophy on a thing from a 20 year old SF film is going to be really persuasive, kid.

My favorite thing about this is they're somehow warping a film made by two trans women into their misogynistic ideology signifier. A scene that has been read convincingly multiple times as a metaphor for HRT and awakening to your gender identity.
  #138  
Old 02-26-2019, 05:30 AM
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Apparently, hitting the bottom of the page and seeing that there's more than one does... I was reading the first page of this thread, scrolled down, and basically reflexively closed the window. There's apparently some kind of investment-to-interest ratio that has to be met for me to continue reading something.

Quote:
Originally Posted by elbows View Post
If there’s an initialized name or department, ( ABC ), WITHOUT following the common publishing protocol of spelling it out fully, upon first use, and ever thereafter abbreviated.

You can’t be arsed to be clear to your readers? I got better things to do than look up something that you’re trying to use in your discussion.
Be clear or be gone!
Yeah, this and other things like it. Using obscure jargon without explaining it to signal that you're in with the cool kids. Untranslated quotes in a different language than the article itself (bonus points if it's in Latin). Impress me with your smarts via the article's content, not via demonstrating your mastery of googling foreign quotes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Manda JO View Post
"I know most of you won't bother to read this . . ."

Fuck you. Passive aggressive bullshit.
Oh, and this, too, massively. "Only 10% will share/like/comment"---show me the research you did to come up with those numbers.

Last edited by Half Man Half Wit; 02-26-2019 at 05:30 AM.
  #139  
Old 02-26-2019, 05:39 AM
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Anything that invokes epigenetics or quantum theory to explain explain anything other than epigenetics or quantum theory.
How about appealing to quantum mechanics to explain epigenetics?
  #140  
Old 02-28-2019, 07:35 PM
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Another. Especially on any kind of social media, the use of "Funny, that." Or "Funny that." Especially when used by North American asshats who never, ever use similar constructions in their posts.
  #141  
Old 03-01-2019, 03:37 PM
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The (generally clickbait) articles that use a headline like "People You Thought Were Dead" or "You Won't Believe What Joe Celeb Is Doing Now!" They don't know what I think or believe. Asshats.
  #142  
Old 03-02-2019, 12:23 PM
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“No offense, but . . .”

means:

“I’m about to say something offensive.”

Can be safely skipped.
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