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  #351  
Old 03-15-2019, 07:05 AM
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Odd opening songs for rock musicians

Anyone wanna talk banjo?

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Who is the Calypso Singer that rides Pegasus?
Harry Bellerophonte
  #352  
Old 03-15-2019, 09:55 AM
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If I ran the grocery store!
Poll: How do YOU wipe your bum?


Toilet paper is in aisle 12.
  #353  
Old 03-15-2019, 03:42 PM
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What is your state's most iconic sight?
Poll: How do YOU wipe your bum?


C'mon, even Arkansas can do better than that.
  #354  
Old 03-17-2019, 07:44 PM
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Who has made the most $ with the least talent?
Should Elizabeth Holmes get jail time?


Yes, but only for making a lot of money without talent.
  #355  
Old 03-18-2019, 10:53 AM
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What do large animals do with their large brains?
A question about how college works


The way it works is that Division I football players tend to wind up as "exercise science" and "human development" majors.
  #356  
Old 03-18-2019, 11:29 AM
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Human Nature is Inherently Stupid
Trump wants to replace food stamps with a box of processed food, everyone gets the same thing

Not all Human Nature. However, Trump is inherently stupid.
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I'm not really an insane rabbit, but I play one on the net.
  #357  
Old 03-18-2019, 01:36 PM
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So, are you having your groceries delivered yet?

Please, please write, or email your senators and representatives.


Hello, Senator? They're not delivering my groceries yet. What can you do about it?
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Who is the Calypso Singer that rides Pegasus?
Harry Bellerophonte
  #358  
Old 03-18-2019, 03:39 PM
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Why isn't implicit differentiation using infinitesimals taught earlier?
So, are you having your groceries delivered yet?


I'll take, "Desperate attempts to respond to rhetorical questions you don't understand" for $400, Alex.
  #359  
Old 03-19-2019, 06:55 AM
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What's the greatest distance someone has run over an hour, a day, a week or a month?
If I ran the grocery store!


I'd run it the farthest anyone has run it in a week.
  #360  
Old 03-19-2019, 07:39 AM
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What Constitutes a "Spoiler"?
Global Exposure
  #361  
Old 03-19-2019, 07:59 AM
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Poll: Are you privileged or oppressed?

Poll: How do YOU wipe your bum?



Since I'm privileged, I have people who do that.
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Who is the Calypso Singer that rides Pegasus?
Harry Bellerophonte
  #362  
Old 03-19-2019, 08:42 AM
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Mass shootings at mosques in New Zealand
Human Nature is Inherently Stupid
Anti-vaxxers are ignorant scumbags that kill children


Stupid times two
  #363  
Old 03-19-2019, 08:45 AM
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USA: a nation of arachnophobes?

Anybody spend St. Patrick's Day in Ireland?



Wouldn't that more likely appeal to ophidiophobes?
  #364  
Old 03-19-2019, 09:11 AM
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Why do hotels have ice machines?
Bedbugs


Ice machine are for the bedbugs?
  #365  
Old 03-19-2019, 10:45 AM
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The Vernal Equinox crosses this MMP
Why did the Cow Cross the Road? To go to Chick-Fil-A


There's a cow jumping over the moon joke in there somewhere
  #366  
Old 03-19-2019, 12:36 PM
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Human Nature is Inherently Stupid
Stupid Republican idea of the day
The Trump Administration: A Clusterfuck in the Making
  #367  
Old 03-19-2019, 01:28 PM
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What do large animals do with their large brains?
how hard is it to rip someone's head off


It's pretty hard if they have a large brain.
  #368  
Old 03-19-2019, 03:03 PM
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What is the "Average American"?
Modest inheritance- what frivolous thing to spend it on?


Sounds about average!
  #369  
Old 03-20-2019, 09:44 AM
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Human Nature is Inherently Stupid
I pit people who hate Marshmallow Peeps


As a Peep lover, I agree

Terrorist shooting in Utrecht (NL)
Any target shooters here. Rifle?


Sickest. Sequential. Thread. Ever (but I couldn't resist)

Last edited by Annie-Xmas; 03-20-2019 at 09:45 AM.
  #370  
Old 03-20-2019, 03:33 PM
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What do the newspapers do if there's too little news to report?
Tell me about Kratom Tea


I've been reading lots of articles about Kratom Tea lately, I guess it's slow season already.
  #371  
Old 03-20-2019, 04:49 PM
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Lease co-signer's obligation to landlord?
Bedbugs


Usually they come with the apartment, but I suppose if the renter got rid of them all, the landlord could demand to be made whole.
  #372  
Old 03-20-2019, 08:55 PM
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What is the deal with Kellyanne Conway and George Conway?
long time married guy, have urge to vacation alone. Am I complete jackhole for even bringing it up?


George, in your situation I think it would be good for both of you!
  #373  
Old 03-20-2019, 09:12 PM
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Woo hoo, I'm retiring! Retirees...what should I be thinking about?
MySpace loses all songs uploaded in its first 12 years of existence.


All that work you did? ::Poof:: it's gone.
  #374  
Old 03-21-2019, 09:15 AM
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Your favorite moral panics
Any advice on killing wasps?


Killing Animals? PETA has a moral panic on that subject
  #375  
Old 03-21-2019, 10:05 AM
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Bariatric Surgery Tomorrow
Snakes in the Basement.


Maybe we can do lunch some other time.
  #376  
Old 03-21-2019, 10:55 AM
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Separated by one:

A few morbid cremation questions
"Do not look into microwave" - any valid reason?


And will using the defrost setting get the job done?
  #377  
Old 03-21-2019, 12:14 PM
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Snakes in the Basement.
Any target shooters here. Rifle?
Who are the most prominent people who disappeared mysteriously, and could still be alive?
  #378  
Old 03-21-2019, 02:30 PM
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Woo hoo, I'm retiring! Retirees...what should I be thinking about?

Snakes in the Basement.




I'm not saying you've got 'em, just that this is what you should be thinking about. Just imagine your basement as if it was that tomb Indy and Marion got thrown into in Raiders of the Lost Ark



Isn't that relaxing?
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Who is the Calypso Singer that rides Pegasus?
Harry Bellerophonte
  #379  
Old 03-21-2019, 03:22 PM
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The Vernal Equinox crosses this MMP

That explains some.




Not all, though.
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Who is the Calypso Singer that rides Pegasus?
Harry Bellerophonte
  #380  
Old 03-21-2019, 05:18 PM
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Are you starting to see the effects of MGTOW?
long time married guy, have urge to vacation alone. Am I complete jackhole for even bringing it up?


A textbook example of Men Going Their Own Way!
  #381  
Old 03-21-2019, 09:08 PM
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Snakes in the Basement
Should we get a budgie?


Maybe you should start with a mongoose.
  #382  
Old 03-21-2019, 11:50 PM
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Snakes in the Basement.
Dealing with your Trump supporter friends


Seems a little extreme.
  #383  
Old 03-22-2019, 07:04 AM
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Woo hoo, I'm retiring! Retirees...what should I be thinking about?

Phrases your (grand)parents used



Start practicing now

"Get off my lawn!"

"We didn't do that in my day!"

"I don't understand music today!"
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Who is the Calypso Singer that rides Pegasus?
Harry Bellerophonte
  #384  
Old 03-22-2019, 09:01 AM
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Phrases your (grand)parents used
Snakes in the Basement.


Yah, she could really dance the hootchie-kootchie. Snakes in the basement, know what I mean?
  #385  
Old 03-22-2019, 09:28 AM
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A few morbid cremation questions
are the mafias in eastern europe really above the law


No caption needed
  #386  
Old 03-22-2019, 09:52 AM
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What's left after making clotted cream?
GoodBeings
  #387  
Old 03-22-2019, 10:05 AM
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Woo hoo, I'm retiring! Retirees...what should I be thinking about?
Funny business names


Start a small business on the side, but give it a funny name so it doesn't take up too much of your time.
  #388  
Old 03-22-2019, 12:16 PM
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Black Sabbath: Hard Rock, or Heavy Metal?
Anyone wanna talk banjo?
  #389  
Old 03-22-2019, 01:36 PM
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"Seattle is Dying"...
I did it!!!


Congratulations, I guess.
  #390  
Old 03-22-2019, 01:43 PM
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Chemistry of flash point and autoignition temperatures
Bread boxes...what happened to them?


Self-baking bread loaves - an idea just a bit ahead of its time.
  #391  
Old 03-22-2019, 02:16 PM
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Phrases your (grand)parents used
The Giraffe Boards are down!!!!


That's what they used to call the Train Station, because the kaiser had stolen their word for "train". They used to say "can I get to Shelbyville at the Giraffe Boards for five bees?"
  #392  
Old 03-23-2019, 07:46 AM
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Know anyone job hunting? or who wants a fun side gig?
A Military Funeral


My punk rock tribute band needs a gig, and we do a terrific version of the Marines Hymn.
  #393  
Old 03-23-2019, 08:20 AM
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Is Huawei a security threat?
Is this the Asian Century that we're living through?...
  #394  
Old 03-24-2019, 05:45 PM
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Funny business names
Snakes in the Basement


Ha ha ha! Is it a pet store? A foundation repair company? Who can tell, but it's a Samuel L. Jackson reference and it's motherf***ing hilarious.
  #395  
Old 03-25-2019, 10:45 AM
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What would you do if you found out a close friend/family member was a pedophile?
Tell server of mistake?


He didn't really download those videos, it's the server's fault!
  #396  
Old 03-25-2019, 10:58 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kunilou View Post
Funny business names
Snakes in the Basement


Ha ha ha! Is it a pet store? A foundation repair company?
An edgy bistro featuring the cuisine of Madagascar?

In a related vein, I frequently drive by a vape shop called "Avail Vapor" and habitually misread the sign as "Anal Vapor".
  #397  
Old 03-25-2019, 12:02 PM
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100 colds at once
My husband and I are at impasse (relationship-wise)
  #398  
Old 03-25-2019, 12:07 PM
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What's your worst trait that you are not going to change?
What would you do if you found out a close friend/family member was a pedophile?


Since they are not going to change, I'd tell them please don't act on it.
  #399  
Old 03-25-2019, 01:04 PM
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Snakes in the Basement
Introducing Max


Max, these are the snakes in the basement.
  #400  
Old 03-25-2019, 02:20 PM
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Let's talk about time machines..............
Name a song that mentions a specific year in its lyrics (please read OP)


Let's do the Time Warp again!
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