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  #101  
Old 04-03-2020, 03:44 PM
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  #102  
Old 04-03-2020, 05:48 PM
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The Governor of Florida issues a "stay at home" order, but exempts religious services. WTF?
According to an article I read about a church in Arkansas, it's to avoid issues with violating the Separation of Church and State.

What I don't get is why the parent organization of said church, the Assemblies of God, hasn't mandated it. All the AG churches around here are down, including one who initially said they were going to try to stay open. And the number of cases here is still under 5 in a population in the magnitude of 10000.

Said church in the above paragraph was also shamed by me on Facebook, for not following the Biblical mandate from God to keep the most vulnerable safe. In a kind way, of course, so they wouldn't treat me as the devil.
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  #103  
Old 04-04-2020, 10:08 PM
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I saw the WBC out picketing today, at one of their original sites, the intersection of 10th and Gage in Topeka. They were strolling up and down with their ugly signs, keeping proper social distancing. Hadn't seen them in quite a while.

I remember back in the mid-90's a friend of mine and I riled them up at that same location. We walked down the drive that comes closest to that site, where they had their cars parked. I pretended to take picktures of the cars, and my friend pretended to take down the license numbers. We were just playacting, but they saw us and started screaming something incoherent. Good times.
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  #104  
Old 04-05-2020, 01:54 AM
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On a related note, I'm noticing a lot of ads for Billy Graham's outfit at this time. I cannot stand these fuckers in the best of times, but here they are now preying on the desperate and gullible. Like sharks that smell blood in the water.
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  #105  
Old 04-05-2020, 02:46 PM
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They were strolling up and down with their ugly signs, keeping proper social distancing.
So they're afraid that their god might make a mistake and strike one of them down!
  #106  
Old 04-05-2020, 03:38 PM
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  #107  
Old 04-05-2020, 03:46 PM
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Lately, people have been hanging red scarves and such at their front doors. Some 21st century blood on the doorpost, I guess.
I just finished watching a replay of an old American Experience episode on the Spanish Influenza. One of the women interviewed who was a small child at the time, said that people in her neighborhood (Italian in Philadelphia) put crepe on the front doors: white for children; black for adults; grey for elderly.
  #108  
Old 04-06-2020, 01:56 AM
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Let's, um, pray? that within this coming week these dangerously virulent fundies lose the lickdown sermon for the lockdown one before they become a national fucking threat.

Cynical prediction: vermin pastor somewhere will try this shit again in a week, National Guard come in (I mean yeah - no shit - anyone would be evil-stupid enough to pull this shit again a week later? naaaaa) to peacably dissemble proceedings; s.v.p. (said vermin pastor) then clamours for the oh-woe-is-me spotlight which most likely should pluck Tucker Carlson's impressionable heartstrings, spinning this into yet another dumb shit-show whining about oppression of their Gaawd-given liberties.
  #109  
Old 04-06-2020, 02:28 AM
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And here are some whackaloons in my neighborhood.

I don't think these people are going to stop unless you arrest them - for them, the police showing up is "points" for putting religion over secular authorities. Freedom of religion and assembly does not extend to endangering others, or at least it shouldn't.
  #110  
Old 04-06-2020, 06:59 AM
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We must not forget that, thanks to an ... expansive ... reading by the Supreme Court, corporations can now covered as "religious people". So I bring you, for a encore, Hobby Lobby. Thanks to a vision from God that the owners' wife had, they're attempting to stay open, coercing workers to report for the apparently "essential" job of being paid like shit for putting your life and the life of everyone you come into contact with on the line for crafts.
So what's Michael's Arts and Craft Stores excuse? They're open, at least around here. According to their own issued statements, they ain't closing either. I don't blame Hobby Lobby for staying open, if their main competitor is also.
  #111  
Old 04-06-2020, 07:10 AM
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So what's Michael's Arts and Craft Stores excuse? They're open, at least around here. According to their own issued statements, they ain't closing either. I don't blame Hobby Lobby for staying open, if their main competitor is also.
WAG-people are crafting to either make a little money or, more likely, as something to do while homebound?
  #112  
Old 04-06-2020, 07:22 AM
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So what's Michael's Arts and Craft Stores excuse? They're open, at least around here. According to their own issued statements, they ain't closing either. I don't blame Hobby Lobby for staying open, if their main competitor is also.
Well, as far as I know Michael's doesn't claim a personal relationship with God like Hobby Lobby. So I would expect HL to show more of a love thy neighbor/heal the sick sort of vibe.
  #113  
Old 04-06-2020, 09:44 AM
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So what's Michael's Arts and Craft Stores excuse? They're open, at least around here. According to their own issued statements, they ain't closing either. I don't blame Hobby Lobby for staying open, if their main competitor is also.
The Michael's in my county got a visit from the sheriff who told them to shut down or face legal penalties. So they shut down.

Along with Hobby Lobby, JoAnn fabrics, and bunch of other businesses deemed non-essential.

It would be nice if government enforcement wasn't required, but alas it's seems to be needed.
  #114  
Old 04-06-2020, 06:36 PM
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The Jews in my neighborhood have been worshiping at home on the Sabbath and live-streamed Purim services. Passover will be a lot less elaborate affair than usual - I'm getting the delivery option since I live alone. Even our Hasidics are staying home and self-isolating.
Hasidic Funerals Still Drawing Huge Crowds, As Coronavirus Batters Ultra-Orthodox Neighborhoods
Maybe the Hasidics and other Ultra-Orthodox are smarter in your neck of the woods, but in my neighboring Brooklyn, the ignorance is still rampant. But hey, at least they won't have to worry about getting vaccinated (yes, this is the same community that fought tooth and nail against city vaccination requirements, to the point where their religious schools had to be padlocked).
  #115  
Old 04-07-2020, 03:11 PM
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Our nightmare is over, folks. Pat Robertson has got this handled.
  #116  
Old 04-08-2020, 11:06 AM
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Howcome he didn't evoke this power two months ago? Methinks it because it was mainly affecting those heathen Chinese and Iye-talians, not God-fearing Americans.
  #117  
Old 04-08-2020, 11:14 AM
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Leaders of major Orthodox Jewish organizations called on followers to heed social distancing advisories.

Others thought God would protect them.
Looks like the photos from that article was taken on Halloween. What's up with all those Jewish kids dressed up in costumes?
  #118  
Old 04-08-2020, 11:40 AM
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Looks like the photos from that article was taken on Halloween. What's up with all those Jewish kids dressed up in costumes?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Purim#Customs
  #119  
Old 04-08-2020, 12:32 PM
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Howcome he didn't evoke this power two months ago? Methinks it because it was mainly affecting those heathen Chinese and Iye-talians, not God-fearing Americans.
Based on his success with hurricanes, Virginia Beach hospitals should be scrounging up all the test kits and ventilators they can find.
  #120  
Old 04-08-2020, 12:34 PM
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Purim is the holiday where God demands that you get wasted. Not just tipsy, but to the point that you can't read.

Let's take a break from bashing religion for a moment to acknowledge that it isn't all bad.
  #121  
Old 04-08-2020, 02:04 PM
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Our nightmare is over, folks. Pat Robertson has got this handled.

God said "gonna"? There's the problem with getting His message around, I guess. The poor guy has atrocious grammar.

I wonder if Robertson knows this moron, who apparently did not understand what the Good Lord meant when He said, "You blow."

Last edited by Monty; 04-08-2020 at 02:04 PM.
  #122  
Old 04-08-2020, 02:44 PM
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We just got a big ol' Easter postcard from a regional (nationwide?) megachurch*, proclaiming:

"Easter means that you never have to fear death. Ever. (Talk about good news.)"

What a relief.

It seems that the Easter story is "designed specifically for streaming". Who knew?

*Crossroads.
  #123  
Old 04-08-2020, 02:57 PM
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Death is the easy bit, it's the living that's hard
  #124  
Old 04-08-2020, 03:27 PM
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I thought it was comedy?
  #125  
Old 04-08-2020, 08:47 PM
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Another pastor is charged. Police chief says
He is still doing it, saying "True Christians do not mind dying"...or killing others for your own publicity, apparently. Why the fuck isn't this guy behind bars?

Last edited by Czarcasm; 04-08-2020 at 08:48 PM.
  #126  
Old 04-08-2020, 09:50 PM
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He is still doing it, saying "True Christians do not mind dying"...or killing others for your own publicity, apparently. Why the fuck isn't this guy behind bars?

Wait a minute, here. The dude's confusing me. If his superpwoerful religion protects him and his congregation from this disease, then how is it supposed to be killing members of that congregation. So, what's he going to do when he gets laid low (perhaps six feet low) by this disease? Is he going to tell everyone that he's not a true Christian?
  #127  
Old 04-08-2020, 09:58 PM
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On a related note, I'm noticing a lot of ads for Billy Graham's outfit at this time. I cannot stand these fuckers in the best of times, but here they are now preying on the desperate and gullible. Like sharks that smell blood in the water.
If it's the ad I think you're talking about, it's his son Franklin Graham. I also saw one earlier today by T. D. Jakes, who's also controversial for good reason.

I hit the mute button whenever they come on, and I'm Christian.
  #128  
Old 04-08-2020, 10:02 PM
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So, what's he going to do when he gets laid low (perhaps six feet low) by this disease? Is he going to tell everyone that he's not a true Christian?
He doesn't really believe that leopards will eat his face.
  #129  
Old 04-09-2020, 12:25 AM
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He doesn't really believe that leopards will eat his face.

When I told my wife about that clown's comment about dying in church, she siad, "Him first!"
  #130  
Old 04-09-2020, 08:37 AM
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Wait a minute, here. The dude's confusing me. If his superpwoerful religion protects him and his congregation from this disease, then how is it supposed to be killing members of that congregation. So, what's he going to do when he gets laid low (perhaps six feet low) by this disease? Is he going to tell everyone that he's not a true Christian?
Pretty much, yeah. It's the standard fallback of the faithful when their faith proves ineffective. "Oh, you prayed and nothing happened? God read your heart and found out you didn't really mean it." or worse, "God moves in mysterious ways," with a hand-wave. They love to set Him up with can't-fail options.
Quote:
Originally Posted by HuffPo in Monty's link
Rev. Tony Spell, pastor of Life Tabernacle Church in the city of Central, is facing six misdemeanor charges after defying Gov. John Bel Edwards’ orders aimed at curbing the spread of the coronavirus. Each count carries a maximum penalty of six months in jail and a $500 fine.
...
In previous interviews, Spell has argued that he’s being persecuted for his faith. He reiterated that point on Wednesday, comparing the stay-at-home orders that now cover most Americans to “tyranny” and “prison.”
With a little luck he'll have 36 months to figure out the difference between quarantine and prison.
  #131  
Old 04-09-2020, 09:17 AM
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Somehow, "virus handler" lacks the marketable zing of "snake handler".
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  #132  
Old 04-11-2020, 09:10 AM
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Easter Edition

“Satan and a virus will not stop us,” said the Reverend Tony Spell, 42, pastor of the evangelical Life Tabernacle Church near Baton Rouge, Louisiana. He expects a crowd of more than 2,000 to gather in worship at his megachurch on Sunday.



“God will shield us from all harm and sickness,”


Spell said in an interview. “We are not afraid. We are called by God to stand against the Antichrist creeping into America’s borders. We will spread the Gospel.”



https://www.reuters.com/article/us-h...-idUSKCN21S10Y
  #133  
Old 04-11-2020, 10:21 AM
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Think of it as evolution in action.
  #134  
Old 04-11-2020, 10:33 AM
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Think of it as evolution in action.
They're protected because they don't believe in evolution.

  #135  
Old 04-11-2020, 10:57 AM
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"....We will spread the Gospel.”
Yeah, you'll spreading something, alright.

Fucking vile subhuman.
  #136  
Old 04-11-2020, 02:44 PM
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They're protected because they don't believe in evolution.

I'm not sure we could call their design intelligent, though.
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  #137  
Old 04-11-2020, 02:54 PM
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Death is the easy bit, it's the living that's hard
Charles Manson said that once.
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  #138  
Old 04-11-2020, 04:18 PM
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“God will shield us from all harm and sickness,”
If he wants a Bible-off, I can do that.

The place where the Bible says this that is usually quoted is in Psalm 91. The first 7 verses have most of it, though I'll also quote 11-12
[1] He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High
shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

[2] I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress:
my God; in him will I trust.
[3] Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler,
and from the noisome pestilence.
[4] He shall cover thee with his feathers,
and under his wings shalt thou trust:
his truth shall be thy shield and buckler.
[5] Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night;
nor for the arrow that flieth by day;
[6] nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness;
nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday.
[7] A thousand shall fall at thy side,
and ten thousand at thy right hand;
but it shall not come nigh thee.
[11] For he shall give his angels charge over thee,
to keep thee in all thy ways.
[12] They shall bear thee up in their hands,
lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.
That's all well and good. But, here's the thing. When Jesus was tempted in the Desert by Satan, Satan himself quoted from Psalm 91, telling him to just foolishly jump off the top of a high place, saying "He shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee: And in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone."

What was Jesus's reply? "Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God." (Matthew 4:7)

So Jesus himself refuted the idea that you should just go out and be reckless because of Scriptural assurances. You are not to test God to try to make him save you from your own foolishness.

And, yeah, saying you can't "test God" might seem a cop out to those of us who are more experimentally minded, but at least it shows that this shit isn't even Christian thought. It's overinflated egos who don't actually know Christianity, or how it could possibly have survived. If people actually thought you could just go out and do stupid shit like this with no consequences, the religion would be dead now.

By my understanding of the Bible, this pastor is failing to do his duty as a pastor, which is to shepherd his flock. He's putting vulnerable people at risk, all for his own glory rather than any of the Lord. He will have a rude awakening when he winds up in Hell.

Because "whatever you do to the least of these, you also do to me."
  #139  
Old 04-11-2020, 04:35 PM
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If he wants a Bible-off, I can do that.

The place where the Bible says this that is usually quoted is in Psalm 91. The first 7 verses have most of it, though I'll also quote 11-12
[1] He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High
shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

[2] I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress:
my God; in him will I trust.
[3] Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler,
and from the noisome pestilence.
[4] He shall cover thee with his feathers,
and under his wings shalt thou trust:
his truth shall be thy shield and buckler.
[5] Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night;
nor for the arrow that flieth by day;
[6] nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness;
nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday.
[7] A thousand shall fall at thy side,
and ten thousand at thy right hand;
but it shall not come nigh thee.
[11] For he shall give his angels charge over thee,
to keep thee in all thy ways.
[12] They shall bear thee up in their hands,
lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.
That's all well and good. But, here's the thing. When Jesus was tempted in the Desert by Satan, Satan himself quoted from Psalm 91, telling him to just foolishly jump off the top of a high place, saying "He shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee: And in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone."

What was Jesus's reply? "Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God." (Matthew 4:7)

So Jesus himself refuted the idea that you should just go out and be reckless because of Scriptural assurances. You are not to test God to try to make him save you from your own foolishness.

And, yeah, saying you can't "test God" might seem a cop out to those of us who are more experimentally minded, but at least it shows that this shit isn't even Christian thought. It's overinflated egos who don't actually know Christianity, or how it could possibly have survived. If people actually thought you could just go out and do stupid shit like this with no consequences, the religion would be dead now.

By my understanding of the Bible, this pastor is failing to do his duty as a pastor, which is to shepherd his flock. He's putting vulnerable people at risk, all for his own glory rather than any of the Lord. He will have a rude awakening when he winds up in Hell.

Because "whatever you do to the least of these, you also do to me."

I've seen Christians posting this Psalms 91 on Reddit as if it means God will shield all believers from the coronavirus. I had to point out that hundreds of Christians already have been sickened by the coronavirus.
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Old 04-11-2020, 04:49 PM
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BigT, I'm going to save that post of yours, it's excellent.
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  #141  
Old 04-11-2020, 04:51 PM
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I've seen Christians posting this Psalms 91 on Reddit as if it means God will shield all believers from the coronavirus. I had to point out that hundreds of Christians already have been sickened by the coronavirus.
Ah but that just shows they weren't true believing Christians.
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Old 04-11-2020, 04:53 PM
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Ah but that just shows they weren't true believing Christians.
Or God pulled away those angels like Lucy pulling away the football.
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Old 04-11-2020, 04:56 PM
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I've seen Christians posting this Psalms 91 on Reddit as if it means God will shield all believers from the coronavirus. I had to point out that hundreds of Christians already have been sickened by the coronavirus.
Considering US demographics, there are already well over 10,000 American Christians dead from the coronavirus.
  #144  
Old 04-11-2020, 05:15 PM
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My pastors wife says we are to obey the government, we were renting a place, but now we have church at their house. Mostly pastor, his wife, their three children, their daughters two babies and daughters baby daddy. So when I go, there's s5I'll less than ten.
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Old 04-11-2020, 05:29 PM
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Um... that's not the point of "shelter in place".

Any one of those people you name could have the virus and not know it and not (yet) showing symptoms. Which means all of you could wind up with it.

You're supposed to isolate with JUST the members of your immediate household. Mixing and matching with other households increases the risk to all. "Less than 10" does not make ya'll magically immune.
  #146  
Old 04-11-2020, 05:48 PM
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They all live together.
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  #147  
Old 04-11-2020, 06:48 PM
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They all live together.
The point is that you don't live there.
  #148  
Old 04-11-2020, 07:25 PM
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My pastors wife says we are to obey the government, we were renting a place, but now we have church at their house. Mostly pastor, his wife, their three children, their daughters two babies and daughters baby daddy. So when I go, there's still less than ten.
And y'all stay six feet away from each other and everyone wears a mask including the children, right?
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Old 04-11-2020, 08:04 PM
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yes, but no masks. they all have jobs. She said God would protect us.
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Old 04-11-2020, 08:15 PM
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Darren Garrison is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SuntanLotion View Post
yes, but no masks. they all have jobs. She said God would protect us.
Then she is a fucking nitwit, and if you believe her, then you are, too.
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