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Old 05-13-2020, 09:54 PM
Asuka is offline
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Friend literally only owns a single hat, am I the asshole for thinking you should own more?


Long story short, before the lockdown friend invited me over to help with yardwork with the promise he'd return the favor soon after. My wife for whatever reason took my "emergency hat" I keep in my vehicle out of it (for sudden rain or emergency bad hair days) so when I got to his house I asked him if I could borrow a hat once I found out my hat was gone as he was already wearing his yard work baseball hat.

He immediately accused me of being irresponsible and claimed that he only owned a single hat, and why would you own more than a single hat? He made it seem like everyone on Earth only owns a single hat and I was somehow an idiot for thinking that people own more than a single hat.

So how many hats do you guys own?
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Old 05-13-2020, 09:59 PM
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Half dozen or so. Don’t think i’d let a friend borrow one though. And I wouldn’t want to borrow one of his either. Just one of those semi-hygenic Items you don’t really share.
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Old 05-13-2020, 10:05 PM
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I don't think it has anything to do with how many hats one owns, but on what your expectations should be when helping out a friend. If you suddenly found out you were minus a hat after you got there, it's perfectly fine to ask if there's a spare around, but it's not fine to then make a fuss when you find out that there isn't one. You should be expected to provide for yourself even when you're helping out a friend in a situation where a hat is desirable. In other words, don't try to turn your problem into his problem.

I can't, of course, be certain, but my suspicion is that your friend only made those statements because he became defensive after you first made a fuss.
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Old 05-13-2020, 10:10 PM
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I own several sun hats, one for each time I went on vacation and forgot to take one with me and had to buy another one. I only need one; I only wear it at the beach.
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Old 05-13-2020, 10:43 PM
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I've given most of mine away because they were baseball hats - freebies given to volunteers at race events. I need more coverage due to basal cell cancers but I have about 5 or 6 that I use all summer.
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Old 05-13-2020, 10:50 PM
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I'm mostly bald and work out in the sun all day, so I buy a bunch of Tractor Supply-branded hats every spring ($5 a piece!). I've also got a fisherman/bucket hat that I use on really hot sunny days to keep the sun off. Finally I've got my "good" hat that I wear out when I'm not working (currently a Detroit Tigers home hat). So I'd say at any given time I have between 6 and 15 hats.

I'm also a bit of a head-sweater, so no one would want to put their heads anywhere near one of the work ones. They typically only last for about three weeks before I've sweated them to death.
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Old 05-13-2020, 10:57 PM
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Originally Posted by Asuka View Post
So how many hats do you guys own?
One.
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Old 05-13-2020, 11:00 PM
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I have one hat. It's straw, and I wear it when I'm on my tractor bush hogging. It keeps my neck from getting burn and the sum out of my eyes.

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Old 05-13-2020, 11:02 PM
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I think I have two?

But I don't know where they are.

I hate hats.


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  #10  
Old 05-13-2020, 11:16 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Asuka View Post
Friend literally only owns a single hat, am I the asshole for thinking you should own more?
Whoa, you're getting emotionally invested in what accessories your friend buys? And how many he has? Would you get upset if he only owned one good pair of shoes? (oh, wait, that's me... but if you came over and asked to borrow a pair of shoes, I'd only have a ratty pair of disgusting work boots for you)

I'd tell you how many (actually, how few) hats I have... but not if you're going to judge me for it...
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Old 05-13-2020, 11:23 PM
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I have 3 ballcaps I could find immediately, and don't really have a preference on, maybe depending on my jacket or whatever. I stopped wearing sports team hats because people assume I want to have a conversation about it. I don't. So they are all unmarked. I have a trapper hat for cold weather, and a cabbie hat, somewhere. I have a full head of hair but I wear a hat when going outside 99% of the time.

Last edited by Ashtura; 05-13-2020 at 11:24 PM.
  #12  
Old 05-13-2020, 11:33 PM
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Hats (for men) stopped being a social norm decades ago, and a lot of my male friends seem to never wear them (or only wear one when it's extremely cold out). One of my best friends does, in fact, own exactly one hat (though it's a very nice brimmed leather hat), and he rarely wears it.

So, I don't think I'd be at all surprised to learn that a guy owns only one hat (or doesn't own a hat at all).

For myself, I do own a lot of them -- I have a dozen or so baseball caps, plus an Indiana Jones fedora, and a trilby. My hair is thin on top, and after a sunburn or two when it started thinning in my late 20s, I started making sure to have a cap or hat on when I'm out in the sun for any length of time.
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Old 05-13-2020, 11:38 PM
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I have one baseball cap and one floppy hat. That's it. Unless you count knit caps/beanies. I have maybe four of those.
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Old 05-13-2020, 11:43 PM
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Owning just one hat is not weird.

Owning more than one hat is not weird.

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Old 05-13-2020, 11:46 PM
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I can't remember the last time I wore a hat.
  #16  
Old 05-13-2020, 11:54 PM
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I've got one, and that was a gift from a co-worker.
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Old 05-14-2020, 12:26 AM
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I know where a folding straw hat is, and there is probably still a sunbrella somewhere, but for all practical purposes of actually wearing one, I don't have a hat and haven't had one for probabaly close to 30 years.
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Old 05-14-2020, 12:30 AM
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I may have a hat or two stashed away somewhere, but can't remember the last time I wore one (decades ago).
  #19  
Old 05-14-2020, 01:03 AM
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I read the OP as that the friend's only worldly possession was a hat.

Thank God I was mistaken.

But back to the subject at hand, I do have a couple of hats, but would rather share my knickers than share a hat if someone came up short- changed. YMMV, of course.
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Old 05-14-2020, 01:14 AM
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Not wanting to lend a hat to you isn't weird. People sweat all over hats and their hair is greasy. Maybe your friend was thinking: "get your own hat! Ew!"
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Old 05-14-2020, 02:04 AM
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I can't understand how that conversation developed. Such a fuss over needing a hat.

Normally, I'd suggest people need to get out more, but maybe they need to get out less.

I have two hats because the semi-tropics are a bitch.
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Old 05-14-2020, 02:41 AM
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I used to hate hats, same as my Dad. My head just doesn't get cold except in extreme winter weather. Then I discovered, long ago, that hats with brims are useful to keep the glare out of my eyes -- glare from the sun or even from downcast ceiling lighting when I am sitting at the computer at night. So I wear a baseball hat on many occasions.

And if I haven't washed or cut my hair for a while, which happens more now than ever while staying at home, I just wear a hat to cover up and look halfway decent in public. Baseball hats work for that, too, so I collect the freebies that come my way. Must have a dozen by now.
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Old 05-14-2020, 03:44 AM
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Only if your friend is Indiana Jones.
  #24  
Old 05-14-2020, 03:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kambuckta View Post
But back to the subject at hand, I do have a couple of hats, but would rather share my knickers than share a hat if someone came up short- changed. YMMV, of course.
Knickers atop your guest's head will hardly repel the Aussie sun.

I have one hat that I carry in the car and use once in while. I used to have a Greg Chappell cricket hat but it has disappeared.
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Old 05-14-2020, 06:10 AM
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20-30 (not counting the ones I've stopped using)

I love hats. Always wear one, and not just baseball caps. I never step out the door without one.
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  #26  
Old 05-14-2020, 06:15 AM
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Originally Posted by Asuka View Post
when I got to his house I asked him if I could borrow a hat once I found out my hat was gone as he was already wearing his yard work baseball hat.

He immediately accused me of being irresponsible
This took me aback. You happen to be caught without a hat. It happens. And he immediately calls you “irresponsible”? That’s bizarre.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Roderick Femm View Post
You should be expected to provide for yourself even when you're helping out a friend in a situation where a hat is desirable. In other words, don't try to turn your problem into his problem.
This is also strangely hostile. These are friends helping each other out. “Provide for yourself” shouldn’t be part of the relationship. A person wanting help with work should expect to have enough tools and equipment to share or should explicitly remind someone that it might be a good idea to bring X, Y, and Z.
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Old 05-14-2020, 06:16 AM
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I have one hat, and I have never worn it.
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  #28  
Old 05-14-2020, 08:30 AM
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I have a couple of baseball caps around somewhere, but I would probably have to do a dedicated search of the house to find them. I haven't worn either in years. Just not something that I enjoy wearing.

Baseball caps also do not fit into the mental category of "hat" for me. When I think of hats I think of something more substantial, like a bowler, a fedora, or a Stetson. So my first instinct was to say that I don't own any hats at all.

I also have a couple of knit caps for winter. But I don't think of those as "hats," either.

I guess I'm a splitter, not a lumper, when it comes to headgear categorization.
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Old 05-14-2020, 08:44 AM
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I think he just didn't want to share.

I love hats and have quite a few. But paradoxically, I never wear them. When I see a new one and like it, "I think, 'Ok! I'll wear THIS one!'" Then I buy it, and I don't wear it. I'm seriously messed up.
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Old 05-14-2020, 08:44 AM
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I own exactly zero hats. If I need to keep my head warm I'll wear something with a hood.
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Old 05-14-2020, 09:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Asuka View Post
Long story short, before the lockdown friend invited me over to help with yardwork with the promise he'd return the favor soon after.
First, that's weird. Yardwork buddies? Seriously?

As for hats, I have a zillion, but would never "loan" one and then wear it later. Eeeeew.
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Old 05-14-2020, 09:12 AM
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To be fair, I wouldn't be thrilled about the prospect of loaning someone a hat for working either. Wouldn't surprise me if he was fibbing.
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Old 05-14-2020, 09:58 AM
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I keep 3 hats in my daily wear rotation and I guess I would toss one to a buddy if they wanted to wear one but I doubt they would fit and its pretty gross to wear someone's hat. I used to have a box of hats I'd collected in my travels but my wife talked me into tossing them that ai could reach into and tell someone to keep it. I don't know that I would want a hat back after someone else was sweating in it.
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Old 05-14-2020, 10:07 AM
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I don't like to wear hats because they give me headaches and squash my hair so much I won't take them off in public.

I have 6 for when I will be in the sun all day. I have 6 different hats because if I'm going to wear it all day it will look like it's part of my outfit. (I would like at least one more and to replace a couple.) I wear hoods, scarves, and earmuffs in the winter. For recess duty on very warm sunny days I carry an umbrella.

My semi-hoarder husband has many, and it's a daily deliberation as to which one he will wear today. It's so much more than a head covering; he must consider his mood, the news of the day, what he's going to be doing, and many other factors.

Sorry that OP and friend got so bent out of shape over something so trivial.
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Old 05-14-2020, 10:13 AM
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Baseball caps - maybe a dozen. Only 2 or 3 of them get worn regularly. The rest are either mementos or spares stashed in the car.

I also own a couple of felt cowboy hats. a pair of Tilley's for outdoor work and a couple of costume hats for whatever.
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Old 05-14-2020, 10:15 AM
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I have about 10 hats, mostly ball caps from places I have visited. I rarely wear them any more. The only hat I wear now is a wide brimmed water proof hat, it is only worn when it's raining. There are things that other people have worn that I won't wear, things like underwear, socks, and hats. I won't loan mine either. If I am working outside and need something to keep the sweat off my brow, I wear a rolled up bandana. I have about 20 to choose from.
  #37  
Old 05-14-2020, 10:26 AM
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I can't understand how that conversation developed. Such a fuss over needing a hat.

Normally, I'd suggest people need to get out more, but maybe they need to get out less.

I have two hats because the semi-tropics are a bitch.
Do you mind if I call you Tokyo "Two Hats" Bayer"?

Anyway I agree this is a silly thing to fuss over. They should beret the hatchet.
  #38  
Old 05-14-2020, 10:39 AM
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Uh... none.

Oh, you mean a hat for yardwork? No, like, a formal hat to wear to an event? I have an irreplaceable (I've tried) floppy hat with a super wide brim and black fabric underneath that I wear to keep the sun out of my eyes. There's no way I would lend that out. I have the non-replacement I bought that is too small for my head and also has a much shorter and less useful brim. I don't know where it is, so I couldn't lend it. I also have a fur cap I bought as a souvenir of Finland that I wear while shoveling snow, especially if it's still falling. I wouldn't lend that, either, but you probably wouldn't want to wear it now anyway. I've had various baseball caps over the years -- usually purchased if I'm in a sunny place but forgot to bring my floppy hat. I rarely wear them and they get gross over time just sitting there (the cardboard decays) and I think I've thrown them all out. Oh, and I might be able to find the wool togue I wore as a kid when I went skiing or played in the snow. It has a big ink stain on one side. But it's probably somewhere and probably still okay. That one is washable, and I might be willing to lend it out if I could find it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roderick Femm View Post
I don't think it has anything to do with how many hats one owns, but on what your expectations should be when helping out a friend. If you suddenly found out you were minus a hat after you got there, it's perfectly fine to ask if there's a spare around, but it's not fine to then make a fuss when you find out that there isn't one. You should be expected to provide for yourself even when you're helping out a friend in a situation where a hat is desirable. In other words, don't try to turn your problem into his problem.

I can't, of course, be certain, but my suspicion is that your friend only made those statements because he became defensive after you first made a fuss.
This. Your behavior was weird. Not forgetting your hat, and not asking if he had one you could borrow, but throwing a hissy fit that he didn't have one for you. I don't generally expect to clothe visiting friends.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TokyoBayer View Post
I can't understand how that conversation developed. Such a fuss over needing a hat...
And this.
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Old 05-14-2020, 12:02 PM
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I can't imagine what would be going so wrong with my life that I needed to argue with a friend over a hat.
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Old 05-14-2020, 12:21 PM
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I've got a sun hat similar to this one from REI, which I bought for a trip to Australia back in 2012. Now I wear it when I do yard work, just because I have it. I acquired a second, floppy, sun hat in Hawaii a few years ago because I forgot to pack the first one. Other than that I have a couple of baseball caps in the closet that I haven't worn in years. I suppose the floppy hat is washable, so I would probably be willing to lend out that one.
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Old 05-14-2020, 12:21 PM
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Dozens. Lots of ball caps that I have bought as souvenirs or received as gifts: sports logos, farm/trucker, golf logos.

Also, my family has a genetic predisposition to collect hats as a hobby - interesting stuff - top hat, pith helmet, shtreimel, straw boater, bowler, drum major, fez, deerstalker, military helmets, etc. I gave all of my collection to my sister years ago, and when she passed away, her combined collection went to a cousin.
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Last edited by Icarus; 05-14-2020 at 12:21 PM.
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Old 05-14-2020, 12:48 PM
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I have a big enough head* that the standard "large" hat is too tight. Uncomfortable and sweaty, so I did without. It was only decades later that I finally found a mail order source of hats big enough for me and for the first time in my life wearing a hat wasn't an ordeal. I now have exactly two: a brimmed hat and a baseball cap. I wear them if I'm feeling particularly oppressed by the sun but usually just do without because I never got in the habit.

* a 3x, men's hat size 8 1/8.
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Old 05-14-2020, 01:23 PM
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I find the whole thing odd. If a friend came over to do me a favor and asked to borrow a hat, I wouldn't tear into him for not having one. If a friend said they didn't have a hat to loan, I wouldn't get upset.
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Old 05-14-2020, 01:41 PM
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The hats I wear the most are my cold weather watch caps/toques/beanies. One's black fleece, and the other is knitted wool.

I have probably 4 baseball hats, but I rarely wear them unless I expect to be out in the sun for an extended period. And I always think I need a better sun hat when I do. Right now, I'm leaning toward a cheap straw cowboy hat- they were originally working hats and are good at blocking sun, while being light and cool.
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Old 05-14-2020, 01:42 PM
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Apparently I have a lot of hats. I have about 7 baseball caps from different places I've traveled to like Arizona, Kenya, Amsterdam etc. I have 3 sunhats and 2 Tilly hats. I'm in Canada so I have all sorts of toques - fleece, knitted etc. I even have a hat with built-in mosquito netting to cover the face and neck.
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Old 05-14-2020, 01:46 PM
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I find the whole thing odd. If a friend came over to do me a favor and asked to borrow a hat, I wouldn't tear into him for not having one. If a friend said they didn't have a hat to loan, I wouldn't get upset.
Definitely
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Old 05-14-2020, 02:08 PM
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Off the top of my head, I have several ballcaps (including one with a Ferenghi logo), a straw sunhat, an Indiana Jones hat, a tweed hat, and a Blues Brothers type fedora. Plus a few knit pullover hats for winter.
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Old 05-14-2020, 02:24 PM
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I do not own a single hat. Not one.

So if you asked to borrow a hat, I couldn't help you. But I wouldn't give you a hard time about it.
  #49  
Old 05-14-2020, 02:32 PM
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Originally Posted by Saintly Loser View Post
I do not own a single hat. Not one.

So if you asked to borrow a hat, I couldn't help you. But I wouldn't give you a hard time about it.
No point making a fedoral case about it, that's for sure.
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Old 05-14-2020, 02:58 PM
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I own two dozen baseball caps--though funny enough none of them are for baseball teams(or any other sports team).

Being in New England I use to own Boston Red Sox and Patriots caps but I got rid of them because I don't actually watch baseball and football respectively. I got tired of people occasionally asking about both teams and having to either awkardly explaining I actually don't watch or BS them into agreeing.
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