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  #39801  
Old 12-12-2018, 03:32 PM
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Originally Posted by ThelmaLou View Post
Well, I hope to be remembered as a Bernadette Peters, the singing, dancing, Broadway musical comedy star with the fabulous hair. I guess we can all hope, amirite?
Know that, if we share nothing else, we at least share a dream.

  #39802  
Old 12-12-2018, 05:22 PM
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Republican Congressmen-elect from Tennessee says vaccines cause autism and the CDC is covering it up.

https://amp.tennessean.com/amp/22881...mpression=true
  #39803  
Old 12-12-2018, 05:43 PM
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Thoughts and prayers to the yokel families that will believe him.
  #39804  
Old 12-12-2018, 05:45 PM
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I always wonder how many of these antivaxxers get flu shots.
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  #39805  
Old 12-12-2018, 10:34 PM
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I saw an anti-vax picketteer while driving the other day. I decided I should yell, "Get an education, asshole!" out the window at her, but by that time it was way too late.
  #39806  
Old 12-12-2018, 10:56 PM
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Thoughts and prayers to the yokel families that will believe him.

Perfect response.
  #39807  
Old 12-13-2018, 01:18 AM
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Republican Congressmen-elect from Tennessee says vaccines cause autism and the CDC is covering it up.

https://amp.tennessean.com/amp/22881...mpression=true
What makes this even worse is that before he sold his soul, the guy was a medical doctor.
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  #39808  
Old 12-13-2018, 01:20 AM
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I bet he really does own a mansion and a yacht, too.
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  #39809  
Old 12-13-2018, 01:30 AM
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Know that, if we share nothing else, we at least share a dream.

Even us younger (by comparison) bucks share that dream. My first serious girlfriend looked just like a teenage Bernadette Peters.
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  #39810  
Old 12-13-2018, 01:49 AM
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In the future, we'll all be Ernest Borgnines.
  #39811  
Old 12-13-2018, 08:39 AM
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Originally Posted by Fear Itself View Post
Republican Congressmen-elect from Tennessee says vaccines cause autism and the CDC is covering it up.

https://amp.tennessean.com/amp/22881...mpression=true
Seems like he walked back his statement.

Someone must have told him how stupid it was.
  #39812  
Old 12-13-2018, 10:25 AM
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Let your mind boggle at this actual Homeland Security press release;

Quote:
WE ARE BUILDING THE FIRST NEW BORDER WALL IN A DECADE.

DHS is committed to building wall and building wall quickly. We are not replacing short, outdated and ineffective wall with similar wall. Instead, under this President we are building a wall that is 30-feet high.

FACT: Prior to President Trump taking office, we have never built wall that high.
Build wall high!
  #39813  
Old 12-13-2018, 10:38 AM
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Originally Posted by Smapti View Post
Let your mind boggle at this actual Homeland Security press release;
Quote:
WE ARE BUILDING THE FIRST NEW BORDER WALL IN A DECADE.

DHS is committed to building wall and building wall quickly. We are not replacing short, outdated and ineffective wall with similar wall. Instead, under this President we are building a wall that is 30-feet high.

FACT: Prior to President Trump taking office, we have never built wall that high.

Build wall high!
Looks like they've already built a wall around the grammar classroom!
  #39814  
Old 12-13-2018, 10:57 AM
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Do not taunt wall!
  #39815  
Old 12-13-2018, 10:59 AM
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Even us younger (by comparison) bucks share that dream. My first serious girlfriend looked just like a teenage Bernadette Peters.
Yeah, that's what I meant.

  #39816  
Old 12-13-2018, 11:03 AM
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Do not taunt wall!
[correction applied] Do not not taunt Happy Fun Wall [/correction applied]

Last edited by running coach; 12-13-2018 at 11:03 AM.
  #39817  
Old 12-13-2018, 11:09 AM
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...Build wall high!
Hulk smash! Trump tweet!
  #39818  
Old 12-13-2018, 11:10 AM
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Wow, they're not even pretending not to be taking dictation from Boris and Natasha any more, are they?
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  #39819  
Old 12-13-2018, 11:20 AM
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[correction applied] Do not not taunt Happy Fun Wall [/correction applied]
Do not correct manson1972!
  #39820  
Old 12-13-2018, 11:37 AM
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Originally Posted by Fretful Porpentine View Post
Wow, they're not even pretending not to be taking dictation from Boris and Natasha any more, are they?
In Soviet Russia, you do not build wall...wall build you.



Yeah, I think we've beat that meme into the ground.

---

OK, fun's fun, now we gotta get back to the serious matters:

Asked about the allegations of criminal activity on behalf of Trump, Rep. Senator replies "I don't care."

Yeah, none of this "Let's see how the investigation plays out" for Orrin Hatch, nossir!

Quote:
Asked if he had any concerns that Trump was implicated, Hatch told CNN: “The Democrats will do anything to hurt this president.” Informed it was alleged by federal prosecutors in New York, Hatch said: “OK, but I don’t care, all I can say is he’s doing a good job as president.” […]

“I don’t think he was involved in crimes but even then, you know, you can make anything a crime under the current laws if you want to, you can blow it way out of proportion, you can do a lot of things.”
The Party of the Rule of Law, ladies and germs, fabled in song and story.
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  #39821  
Old 12-13-2018, 11:38 AM
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and in the far, far future...
  #39822  
Old 12-13-2018, 12:22 PM
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Climate change? Pshaw, liberals can make the extinction of most life on Earth into such a hyperventilating big whoop dee doo.

$1T debts bankrupting the nation's future to benefit corrupt oligarchs and our Russian rivals? There they go again, making a mountain out of a molehill.

Tell me again Uncle Hatch about how the angel Gabriel inscribed scripture on golden plates, but verifying the physical evidence of that is just no big deal!
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  #39823  
Old 12-13-2018, 12:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jasg View Post
and in the far, far future...
Now that's some awesome posting right there, that is.
  #39824  
Old 12-13-2018, 02:34 PM
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Originally Posted by Smapti View Post
Let your mind boggle at this actual Homeland Security press release;



Build wall high!

Do they mean the wall is high or they are high?
  #39825  
Old 12-13-2018, 04:21 PM
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Originally Posted by Smapti View Post
Let your mind boggle at this actual Homeland Security press release;



Build wall high!
Surely, that's The Onion. (I know, don't call you Shirley.)
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  #39826  
Old 12-13-2018, 05:15 PM
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I'm just glad we've finally crack the technology needed to start building things that are over 30 feet tall.
  #39827  
Old 12-13-2018, 05:22 PM
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Do you know who is damn happy about this?
All the stockholders of "35-Foot Ladders R Us".
  #39828  
Old 12-13-2018, 06:41 PM
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this bit is snertworthy
David Inskeep: Part of the government would shut down unless Congress passes spending measures by December 21. Our next guest is among those charged with that responsibility. Warren Davidson is a Republican from Ohio's 8th Congressional District.
...
Davidson: I've offered a modest compromise called Buy a Brick, Build a Wall (ph) that we introduced, which lets the American people, or whomever should choose to donate - Mexicans or otherwise - to donate to the program.

Inskeep: You mean like this highway is adopted by a certain organization? You could buy a part of the wall?

Davidson: Sort of. You could do with this sort of, like, crowdfunding site. Or you could even do blockchain, and you could have wall coins. But you could raise the money. And frankly, if we get it right at the Treasury, you could even accept Mexican pesos.

Last edited by eschereal; 12-13-2018 at 06:43 PM.
  #39829  
Old 12-13-2018, 06:53 PM
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Please, please, please do this. (Reuters)

Quote:
President Donald Trump has been hearing appeals from some advisers to consider his son-in-law and senior adviser Jared Kushner for the position of White House chief of staff, two sources familiar with the situation said on Thursday.
I can think of nothing more satisfying than Trump's new CoS being arrested and indicted 2 days after he takes the reins.
  #39830  
Old 12-13-2018, 09:36 PM
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[/I]Davidson: Sort of. You could do with this sort of, like, crowdfunding site. Or you could even do blockchain, and you could have wall coins. But you could raise the money. And frankly, if we get it right at the Treasury, you could even accept Mexican pesos.[/COLOR][/INDENT]
What the hell does this even mean?
  #39831  
Old 12-13-2018, 09:39 PM
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What the hell does this even mean?
"Forget it, Manson; it's Trumpspeak"

Last edited by The Stainless Steel Rat; 12-13-2018 at 09:39 PM.
  #39832  
Old 12-13-2018, 09:46 PM
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What the hell does this even mean?
It means “I am a total fucking moron” (Republican).
  #39833  
Old 12-13-2018, 09:52 PM
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"Forget it, Manson; it's Trumpspeak"
Quote:
Originally Posted by eschereal View Post
It means “I am a total fucking moron” (Republican).
Oh yeah, right. Sorry, I forgot.

Friggin' "block chain"

Moron.
  #39834  
Old 12-13-2018, 09:53 PM
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"Forget it, Manson; it's Trumpspeak"
Trumpspeak = spew out a bunch of word salad including a few ingredients you heard somewhere on teh innerwebs, make things up you think are clever as shit, use magical thinking to make pesos into American money just for All Your Wall Are Belong To Me (you see? Even I can do it. It's that easy), and convince at least some portion of the population that blockchain is actually a material that can be used to build said wall, just like that song "Another block(chain) in the Wall."
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  #39835  
Old 12-13-2018, 09:57 PM
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this bit is snertworthy
...
Davidson: Sort of. You could do with this sort of, like, crowdfunding site. Or you could even do blockchain, and you could have wall coins. But you could raise the money. And frankly, if we get it right at the Treasury, you could even accept Mexican pesos
[Homer Simpson] Oooh, he card-reads good. [/Homer Simpson]
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End of Line.

Last edited by Nobody; 12-13-2018 at 10:00 PM.
  #39836  
Old 12-13-2018, 10:56 PM
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7-year-old migrant girl taken into Border Patrol custody dies of dehydration, exhaustion
Quote:
A 7-year-old girl from Guatemala died of dehydration and shock after she was taken into Border Patrol custody last week for crossing from Mexico into the United States illegally with her father and a large group of migrants along a remote span of New Mexico desert, U.S. Customs and Border Protection said Thursday.

The child’s death is likely to intensify scrutiny of detention conditions at Border Patrol stations and CBP facilities that are increasingly overwhelmed by large numbers of families seeking asylum in the United States.

According to CBP records, the girl and her father were taken into custody about 10 p.m. Dec. 6 south of Lordsburg, N.M., as part of a group of 163 people who approached U.S. agents to turn themselves in.

More than eight hours later, the child began having seizures at 6:25 a.m., CBP records show. Emergency responders, who arrived soon after, measured her body temperature at 105.7 degrees, and according to a statement from CBP, she “reportedly had not eaten or consumed water for several days.”

After a helicopter flight to Providence Children’s Hospital in El Paso, the child went into cardiac arrest and “was revived,” according to the agency. “However, the child did not recover and died at the hospital less than 24 hours after being transported,” CBP said.
...
So, Mr. (So-Called) President, do you OWN this? Are you PROUD of this, you motherfucker?
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  #39837  
Old 12-13-2018, 11:49 PM
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7-year-old migrant girl taken into Border Patrol custody dies of dehydration, exhaustion
So, Mr. (So-Called) President, do you OWN this? Are you PROUD of this, you motherfucker?
"She wasn't a citizen, right?"
  #39838  
Old 12-14-2018, 07:00 AM
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Please, please, please do this. (Reuters)

I can think of nothing more satisfying than Trump's new CoS being arrested and indicted 2 days after he takes the reins.
That'll be the same Jared who couldn't get his requested security clearance after repeatedly failing to fill out his application properly (an act, by the way, which is a felony).
  #39839  
Old 12-14-2018, 08:16 AM
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“… A source familiar with Trump’s thinking said …”

Ouch. I mean, I understand the basic concept of the null hypothesis, and the idea of studying the properties of vacuum, but this hurts my head.
  #39840  
Old 12-14-2018, 09:21 AM
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Borgnine stank in From Here to Eternity!
  #39841  
Old 12-14-2018, 09:23 AM
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Totally redeemed himself in Escape from New York.
  #39842  
Old 12-14-2018, 03:49 PM
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Fresh out of his grueling 12 day prison term, George Papadopolous says he wants to run for Congress.
https://www.politico.com/story/2018/...ngress-1065721
  #39843  
Old 12-14-2018, 04:32 PM
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Fresh out of his grueling 12 day prison term, George Papadopolous says he wants to run for Congress.
https://www.politico.com/story/2018/...ngress-1065721
And he's just confirmed it:
"It is true. I will be running for Congress in 2020, and I will win. Stay tuned."
https://twitter.com/GeorgePapa19/sta...74954518847488
  #39844  
Old 12-14-2018, 04:35 PM
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A Trump endorsement should seal his doom.
  #39845  
Old 12-14-2018, 04:44 PM
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7-year-old migrant girl taken into Border Patrol custody dies of dehydration, exhaustion
So, Mr. (So-Called) President, do you OWN this? Are you PROUD of this, you motherfucker?
Quote:
...Hogan Gidley, the White House deputy press secretary, called Jakelin’s death “a horrific, tragic situation.”

A reporter asked if the administration would take any responsibility for the death.

“Does the administration take responsibility for a parent taking a child on a trek through Mexico to get to this country?” Mr. Gidley responded. “No.”
...
Cite

She didn't die on the trip, you MF asshole. She died in the custody of the United States of America as a consequence of orders from your MF boss.
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  #39846  
Old 12-14-2018, 05:12 PM
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Cite

She didn't die on the trip, you MF asshole. She died in the custody of the United States of America as a consequence of orders from your MF boss.
There was a woman in Target this afternoon having a phone conversation with her phone set on speaker. The woman she was talking to was ranting about how it was the parents' fault the girl died, not the Border Patrol's. The Border Patrol didn't drag the child 2,000 miles across the desert. I just shook my head and thought, well, I guess if you're inconsiderate enough to have a speaker phone conversation in the store, you're probably gonna have friends who are just as fucking stupid as you are.
  #39847  
Old 12-14-2018, 07:38 PM
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Why just think it? She was using a speakerphone, her friend would've got the message.
  #39848  
Old 12-14-2018, 09:08 PM
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Totally redeemed himself in Escape from New York.
No, no, it’s a quotation *. The proper answer is “Shaddup!”

Otherwise you’re correct. Borgnine was great as Cabbie.

* One of Drew Friedman’s most brilliant one-pagers
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Uke

Last edited by Ukulele Ike; 12-14-2018 at 09:09 PM.
  #39849  
Old 12-14-2018, 09:12 PM
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Not only will they look like Borgnine, they will talk like him, too.

“I got dis goddam painful rectal itch.”
“You should SEE my corns.”
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  #39850  
Old 12-14-2018, 10:24 PM
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And will live to be Ninety-plus

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3I_PeLNzxNQ
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