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  #851  
Old 11-28-2018, 11:52 PM
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Pretty please?
  #852  
Old 11-29-2018, 12:24 AM
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Uh, no.
  #853  
Old 11-29-2018, 03:49 AM
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Heh, my sig used to be, "The Threadkiller."
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Last edited by Face Intentionally Left Blank; 11-29-2018 at 03:50 AM.
  #854  
Old 11-29-2018, 08:21 AM
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Apparently, you've lost your touch.

I, OTOH, have just lost touch.
  #855  
Old 11-29-2018, 09:56 AM
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That's, "tetched."
  #856  
Old 11-29-2018, 10:09 AM
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I keep closing this thread, but someone always messes it up.
  #857  
Old 11-29-2018, 10:43 AM
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What do you mean?
  #858  
Old 11-29-2018, 11:40 AM
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Annon edhellen, edro hi ammen.
  #859  
Old 11-29-2018, 11:58 AM
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Toot Uncommon?
  #860  
Old 11-29-2018, 01:53 PM
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(He said "toot")
  #861  
Old 11-29-2018, 04:39 PM
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I had beans for breakfast. I'll be tootin' all day!
  #862  
Old 11-29-2018, 05:09 PM
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Musical fruit.
  #863  
Old 11-29-2018, 05:18 PM
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It's outta tune.
  #864  
Old 11-29-2018, 05:30 PM
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It's outta tune.
  #865  
Old 11-29-2018, 05:49 PM
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Twice as nice.
  #866  
Old 11-29-2018, 08:27 PM
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I had double trouble.
  #867  
Old 11-29-2018, 08:46 PM
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so did Stevie Ray Vaughan

Last edited by eschereal; 11-29-2018 at 08:47 PM.
  #868  
Old 11-29-2018, 08:47 PM
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Doppelganger Danger!!!
  #869  
Old 11-30-2018, 12:14 AM
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Where!?!?
  #870  
Old 11-30-2018, 09:13 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by burpo the wonder mutt View Post
That's, "tetched."
In properly spoken Southern English, a person who is (or does something) crazy can be described as "tetched in the hade" (touched in the head), but one loses "touch" with reality ("S/he done lost touch, bless their little heart"). It's a very fine distinction that should never be violated, but no one knows why.

Does anyone know of a good college looking for an SSL (Southern as a Second Language) professor or translator?

Last edited by Doctor Jackson; 11-30-2018 at 09:16 AM.
  #871  
Old 11-30-2018, 10:33 AM
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Quote:
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In properly spoken Southern English, <snip>
I do d'clare, y'almost made me spit my mint julep all ovah m'keyboahd.

My kin are from nawthen 'bama, so I realize (as I'm sure you do) that Southern English changes every half mile or so--roughly "over the next ridge." The fact that you and I both recognize the word "tetch," should be considered a minor miracle in that respect, cuz.
  #872  
Old 11-30-2018, 11:08 AM
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Q: Why do some southerners believe the Three Wise Men were firefighters?
A: Because Scripture says "they came from afar."
  #873  
Old 11-30-2018, 11:16 AM
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Uncle Frank couldn't read or write so there was no note or letter found where
he died. Just a rope around his neck and the kitchen table turned on it's side.
  #874  
Old 11-30-2018, 11:37 AM
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Quote:
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Q: Why do some southerners believe the Three Wise Men were firefighters?
A: Because Scripture says "they came from afar."
Q: Why couldn't Christmas have been held in Alabama?
A: They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.
  #875  
Old 11-30-2018, 11:39 AM
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"This was my dad's radio," the little boy said
"But I guess it's mine and mom's now, 'cause my daddy's dead!"
Dad had a wreck about a month ago
He was trying to get home in a blinding snow
  #876  
Old 11-30-2018, 12:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by burpo the wonder mutt View Post
I do d'clare, y'almost made me spit my mint julep all ovah m'keyboahd.

My kin are from nawthen 'bama, so I realize (as I'm sure you do) that Southern English changes every half mile or so--roughly "over the next ridge." The fact that you and I both recognize the word "tetch," should be considered a minor miracle in that respect, cuz.
Y'all ain't a-doin' it right. It's 'titched' in the hade. And a ghost is a 'haint'.
"Memaw was titched in the hade and drownt in that there crike. Now she spooks us, coz she's a haint."
  #877  
Old 11-30-2018, 12:59 PM
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Quote:
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Uncle Frank couldn't read or write so there was no note or letter found where
he died. Just a rope around his neck and the kitchen table turned on it's side.
"Its".
  #878  
Old 11-30-2018, 01:27 PM
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"Its".
Cue Liberty Bell!
  #879  
Old 11-30-2018, 01:41 PM
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Hey, I didn't write the song.
  #880  
Old 11-30-2018, 02:10 PM
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Proclamations of innocence are rarely effective.
  #881  
Old 11-30-2018, 06:23 PM
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Hey, I didn't write the song.
Yes. We know. Manilow does.
  #882  
Old 11-30-2018, 07:58 PM
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Khrushchev was misunderstood. He was threatening America with Manilow when he said “We will Barry you!
  #883  
Old 12-01-2018, 10:53 AM
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Good thing he was misunderstood. We'd have surrendered immediately if we had understood that threat.
  #884  
Old 12-01-2018, 12:26 PM
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Manilow could bury this thread.
  #885  
Old 12-01-2018, 12:31 PM
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It was actually a peace offering: "We will Burry you!" Burry made fantastic cookies; Gaucho, Fudge Town...



Uh, where am I?
  #886  
Old 12-01-2018, 02:56 PM
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Let's hope not in Fudge Town.
  #887  
Old 12-01-2018, 02:59 PM
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Is that near Hershey, PA?
  #888  
Old 12-01-2018, 03:44 PM
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Just up the highway.
  #889  
Old 12-01-2018, 04:05 PM
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for a loose definition of “just”
  #890  
Old 12-01-2018, 08:38 PM
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I was told the highways in Hershey are all one way.
  #891  
Old 12-01-2018, 09:13 PM
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South, I presume?
  #892  
Old 12-01-2018, 10:36 PM
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Hershey, as I recall (from having been through there once) is a suburb of Harrisburg, the capital of the Commonwealth and home to Three Mile Island, so we can guess where the highways go.
  #893  
Old 12-01-2018, 10:52 PM
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Did the air smell like chocolate? I need to know.
  #894  
Old 12-01-2018, 10:59 PM
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Oh, yeah, the entire town smelled like chocolate (at least back in the '60s & '70s) and you used to be able to tour the actual factory.
  #895  
Old 12-02-2018, 08:15 PM
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The streetlights are memorable, too: https://i.pinimg.com/736x/f0/0c/fc/f...eys-kisses.jpg
  #896  
Old 12-02-2018, 08:19 PM
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Oh, cute.
  #897  
Old 12-02-2018, 08:57 PM
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I do not really remember the smell of chocolate in town, but it was November, so the cold air was probably keeping it down.
  #898  
Old 12-02-2018, 09:09 PM
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I'm just glad to discover that wasn't all euphemism.
  #899  
Old 12-03-2018, 10:54 AM
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Euphemism,
mephamism
All depends
on your internal prism.
  #900  
Old 12-03-2018, 11:59 AM
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Now let’s you just drop them pants...
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