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  #28151  
Old 12-16-2018, 09:40 AM
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ThelmaLou ThelmaLou is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DesertDog View Post
The light's come on and the cockroaches are disappearing under the refrigerator.
Call them guys with the fork lift and let's get that refrigerator outta there!

(If this were an episode of Law & Order-- any one of them-- there would be a body or three inside that fridge. Just sayin'.)
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  #28152  
Old 12-16-2018, 12:16 PM
elucidator elucidator is offline
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This cheese could be salvaged. Maybe some. This leftover chili, at least two weeks, not even going to look, fungal jungle, most likely. Corpse seems to be OK.
  #28153  
Old 12-16-2018, 12:28 PM
k9bfriender k9bfriender is offline
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Originally Posted by Sterling Archer View Post
They know this. Most of their followers don’t, but you can bet the politicians pushing for a wall know it will do next to nothing to reduce illegal immigration.

They’ve already hinted at step 2, but here’s what it will be after we have a wall: “The wall cannot be effective under our terrible Democrat immigration laws”.

This will then result in getting rid of VISA’s, ending asylum and refugee programs, and cutting way back on legal immigration. Only then does a wall start to matter.

Never doubt their real goal here is to try to rewind the browning of America. They fear their precious white culture is fading away.
Bolding mine:

Yeah, to keep *us* in.
  #28154  
Old 12-16-2018, 05:17 PM
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I like Sam Bee's latest moniker for президент Trump, in dignified caps:

PRES. FAUNTLEROY P. GOLDSCHITTER
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  #28155  
Old 12-16-2018, 05:45 PM
Yllaria Yllaria is offline
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Originally Posted by Happy Lendervedder View Post
Well now I'm dying to know what the other Spinal Tap references could be. Wall along the southern border that's only 18-inches high due to typographical error? Trump brags at a cabinet meeting about a report filed by his interns that claims he cultivates "an unbelievably sexy environment?" Confirmation that he got lost on the way to the dining room at Mar-a-Lago?
Didn't one of the drummers spontaneously combust?
  #28156  
Old 12-16-2018, 05:57 PM
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You know, several, you know, dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported.
  #28157  
Old 12-16-2018, 06:28 PM
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You know, several, you know, dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported.
Pshaw, the real question is: how many people have choked on somebody else's vomit?
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  #28158  
Old 12-16-2018, 09:39 PM
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I did do this some while back, but nobody was impressed.
  #28159  
Old 12-16-2018, 10:12 PM
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Originally Posted by eschereal View Post
I did do this some while back, but nobody was impressed.
Don't mock Spinal Tap!
  #28160  
Old Yesterday, 02:41 AM
kaylasdad99 kaylasdad99 is online now
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Originally Posted by eschereal View Post
I did do this some while back, but nobody was impressed.
And you wonder why nobody likes you?

I keed, I keed
  #28161  
Old Yesterday, 03:07 AM
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“Nobody” is a slight exaggeration. Very slight.
  #28162  
Old Yesterday, 12:50 PM
wguy123 wguy123 is online now
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this one seems obvious.
I think this is probably another contender:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dAargSCXQaQ
  #28163  
Old Yesterday, 01:15 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Randolph View Post
You know, several, you know, dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported.
Just more evidence that the media are the enemy of the people.
  #28164  
Old Yesterday, 03:39 PM
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hmmm
… In addition to blasting the conditions inside the nation’s prisons, Trump also questioned whether “putting someone in jail for one or two felonies serves any purpose.”
“I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately,” he said. “Prison solves nothing.”

Borowitz
  #28165  
Old Yesterday, 03:41 PM
ElvisL1ves ElvisL1ves is online now
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Pssst ... satire ...
  #28166  
Old Yesterday, 03:45 PM
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psst – yes, I know, that is why I put the “Borowitz” under there
  #28167  
Old Yesterday, 04:09 PM
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Trump is considering pardoning a Green Beret who was arrested for committing murder in Afghanistan. The guy he is charged with murdering is, according to the right wing, a bomb maker. I don't know whether he was or not, but the US command had let the guy go, and the Green Beret was ordered to escort him back to his home. Instead, the Green Beret took him out and shot him. That's murder. That's a war crime. But since Fox News is arguing for his release, the Orange Cheeto is thinking about it.
  #28168  
Old Yesterday, 04:24 PM
Kimstu Kimstu is offline
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Originally Posted by Rick Kitchen View Post
Trump is considering pardoning a Green Beret who was arrested for committing murder in Afghanistan. [...] But since Fox News is arguing for his release, the Orange Cheeto is thinking about it.
What's bizarrest is that it appears the accused was not in trouble until he bragged about the killing on Fox:
Quote:
[...] Major Golsteyn [...] during a job interview with the C.I.A. in 2011, volunteered that he had killed a suspected bomb maker a year earlier in Afghanistan. The Army opened an investigation but did not charge Major Golsteyn, instead stripping him of a Silver Star and an elite Special Forces tab, and issuing a letter of reprimand.

But then, five years later, in an appearance on Fox News, Major Golsteyn again said he had shot the Afghan. The Army opened a second investigation in late 2016, and charged Major Golsteyn with murder last week. [...]

Major Golsteyn and another American soldier, concerned that the man, if released, would kill American troops or report that the tribal leader was working with the Americans, took him off the base, shot and killed him, and buried his remains in a shallow grave, the documents say.

Later that night, Major Golsteyn and two other soldiers dug up the remains, brought them back to their base and burned them in a pit used to dispose of trash [...]
Uh, yeah, doesn't sound murdery at all.
Quote:
Two years later, in 2013, the Army closed the case without charging Major Golsteyn. [...]

In November 2016, Major Golsteyn appeared in a Fox News special report. Asked by the anchor Bret Baier whether he had killed the suspected bomb maker, he replied, “Yes.”

One Defense Department official said on Sunday that Major Golsteyn’s admission had forced the Army to reopen the case. On Thursday, Major Golsteyn received written notification from the Army that he was being charged with premeditated murder. If convicted, he could face the death penalty. [...]

Military justice scholars said the case was reminiscent of when President Richard M. Nixon tried to intervene in the case of William L. Calley Jr., a former Army officer convicted of killing 22 unarmed South Vietnamese civilians in the My Lai massacre. Other presidents, though, have kept their distance. [...]

Abdul Karim Attal, a member of the Helmand provincial council, said in a telephone interview on Sunday that a pardon for Major Golsteyn would “give logic to those who say they are waging war against the Americans in Afghanistan because the Americans are not even committed to their own justice system.” [...]

“This is not the only case where they made a blunder; there are even more serious cases being committed by American soldiers in Afghanistan, like the one where a soldier killed two families, including women and children, and then burned them,” said Bashir Ahmad Shakir, another member of the provincial council.

He added: “For a strong country, there should be a strong code of law and order. If you break that code, it means you have no faith in justice and then the people of Afghanistan will doubt you when you ask people to adhere to principles of justice and human rights.”

Last edited by Kimstu; Yesterday at 04:24 PM.
  #28169  
Old Today, 12:40 AM
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I thought this was posted elsewhere but can't find it so maybe it was just another one of my psychotic hallucinations, so: despite US squeamishness now to address climate change, the Maison de Blanc still managed to find a way to ingratiate themselves into the Poland climate conference by sending a delegation that set up side events touting how cool fossil fuels and Saudi Arabia are.
To give credit where it was due: having nothing to do with the White House freak side show, a separate US delegation of professional negotiators hammered out a rule book for countries to regularly report their emissions rates. Other goals in limiting emissions were also set.
Getting back to the fucking White House side show thing, the fucking gall - it's like, I dunno...Milo Yiannopoulis (loudly) turning up at a Stacey Abrams constituency meeting, or substituting one of the PBS Friday Night Mumblers (Dave Brooks or Mark Sheilds) with EWWWWWW Steven Miller - or actually that could be somewhat likely. (Make it Richard Spencer instead.) That shit just won't fly. Fortunately, according to Environmental Defense Fund senior VP Nathaniel Keohane, the WH freak sideshow went essentially unnoticed.
  #28170  
Old Today, 11:45 AM
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Trump Foundation to be dissolved in agreement with NY AG's office.

Quote:
Underwood alleged in her lawsuit that Trump’s charity was, for years, “little more than an empty shell” with no oversight by a functioning board of directors, and she pointed out that the nonprofit had not had a board meeting since 1999.

Underwood said the foundation also made a series of questionable donations to other charitable organizations to settle legal claims involving Trump businesses, including his South Florida Mar-a-Lago retreat, while another donation went toward promoting Trump’s international hotels. The attorney general’s office also alleged that Trump handed over control of the charity to his presidential campaign in 2016, as it made strategic donations to charities and events in key campaign states like Iowa and New Hampshire.

...

“Our petition detailed a shocking pattern of illegality involving the Trump Foundation — including unlawful coordination with the Trump presidential campaign, repeated and willful self-dealing, and much more," Underwood said in a statement Tuesday. "This amounted to the Trump Foundation functioning as little more than a checkbook to serve Mr. Trump’s business and political interests."
Pattern of illegality? Trump?! You mean the President of the United States? Say it ain't so!

Last edited by Happy Lendervedder; Today at 11:45 AM.
  #28171  
Old Today, 11:57 AM
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ThelmaLou ThelmaLou is offline
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Originally Posted by Happy Lendervedder View Post
Trump Foundation to be dissolved in agreement with NY AG's office.



Pattern of illegality? Trump?! You mean the President of the United States? Say it ain't so!
"I believe there's gambling going on here!!"
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  #28172  
Old Today, 12:01 PM
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… The attorney general’s office also alleged that Trump handed over control of the charity to his presidential campaign in 2016, as it made strategic donations to charities and events in key campaign states like Iowa and New Hampshire. …
<stuttering syllables almost forming words>
No. That is over the line.
  #28173  
Old Today, 12:11 PM
kaylasdad99 kaylasdad99 is online now
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Originally Posted by Rick Kitchen View Post
Trump is considering pardoning a Green Beret who was arrested for committing murder in Afghanistan. The guy he is charged with murdering is, according to the right wing, a bomb maker. I don't know whether he was or not, but the US command had let the guy go, and the Green Beret was ordered to escort him back to his home. Instead, the Green Beret took him out and shot him. That's murder. That's a war crime. But since Fox News is arguing for his release, the Orange Cheeto is thinking about it.
The guy he is charged with murdering WAS, according to the right wing, a bomb maker.

FTFY
  #28174  
Old Today, 12:53 PM
Steve MB Steve MB is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rick Kitchen View Post
Trump is considering pardoning a Green Beret who was arrested for committing murder in Afghanistan. The guy he is charged with murdering is, according to the right wing, a bomb maker. I don't know whether he was or not, but the US command had let the guy go, and the Green Beret was ordered to escort him back to his home. Instead, the Green Beret took him out and shot him. That's murder. That's a war crime. But since Fox News is arguing for his release, the Orange Cheeto is thinking about it.
I presume that the President is pondering the evidence he finds to be relevant, by which I mean that he is studying a Pantone chart, a skin sample from the accused, and a skin sample from the deceased.
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  #28175  
Old Today, 01:02 PM
Euphonious Polemic Euphonious Polemic is online now
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… The attorney general’s office also alleged that Trump handed over control of the charity to his presidential campaign in 2016, as it made strategic donations to charities and events in key campaign states like Iowa and New Hampshire. …
So the "punishment" for this crime of using a charitable foundation as a political slush fund is.... Shut the foundation after the crime has been successfully completed.

Big fucking deal. This is no punishment at all.

What's to prevent Trump from simply opening up another "charitable foundation" and doing exactly the same thing next election?
  #28176  
Old Today, 01:04 PM
jsc1953 jsc1953 is online now
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I presume that the President is pondering the evidence he finds to be relevant, by which I mean that he is studying a Pantone chart, a skin sample from the accused, and a skin sample from the deceased.
Think of the intervening steps of awfulness.

1. An American kills an Afghani.

2. Fox News gets involved, and decides that since the American is a soldier! and Green Beret! (cue eagles and fireworks) and the victim is some Mooslim from a dirtbag country, that there must be a miscarriage of justice going on somehow.

3. And since things go straight from Fox News to the president's "brain" and out his mouth, we now have the Chief Executive sticking his stubby little fingers in a criminal investigation.
  #28177  
Old Today, 01:06 PM
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Originally Posted by Euphonious Polemic View Post
So the "punishment" for this crime of using a charitable foundation as a political slush fund is.... Shut the foundation after the crime has been successfully completed.

Big fucking deal. This is no punishment at all.

What's to prevent Trump from simply opening up another "charitable foundation" and doing exactly the same thing next election?
As I read the article, the foundation is dissolved today but the criminal investigation is ongoing.
  #28178  
Old Today, 02:13 PM
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Big fucking deal. This is no punishment at all.
Oh contraire, this is the most severe kind: Capital Punishment.
  #28179  
Old Today, 02:26 PM
Euphonious Polemic Euphonious Polemic is online now
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As I read the article, the foundation is dissolved today but the criminal investigation is ongoing.
I hope so, but I saw nothing in the article that would lead me to believe this.

My cynical self will guess this whole thing will be just quietly "disappeared", and nothing more will be done.
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