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  #101  
Old 09-07-2019, 10:47 PM
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Do you want fries with that?

If I wanted fries, I'd have ordered fries! So yeah get me some fries now that you mentioned it.
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  #102  
Old 09-07-2019, 10:54 PM
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Do you want fries with that?
Does anyone still say that? I thought nowadays it was "Do you want the combo meal?"
  #103  
Old 09-08-2019, 05:16 AM
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I had a co-worker once ask me which came first, the American Revolution or the Civil War.
I don't remember what history class it was but in College my professor was adamant that we should actually be referring to the American Revolution as "The American Colonial Civil War" or "The Colonial Secession" because the point of the Revolution wasn't to depose the British Government but rather to just break-away from it.
  #104  
Old 09-08-2019, 08:49 AM
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I had a co-worker once ask me which came first, the American Revolution or the Civil War.
Then former NYC mayor and candidate for President John Lindsay was a guest host on GMA from time to time. Once he had on a rep. from the DAR. He asked her if her ancestor fought for the North or the South.

Then such a mistake really stood out. Now, not so much.
  #105  
Old 09-08-2019, 09:30 AM
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Then former NYC mayor and candidate for President John Lindsay was a guest host on GMA from time to time. Once he had on a rep. from the DAR. He asked her if her ancestor fought for the North or the South.

Then such a mistake really stood out. Now, not so much.
GMA = Good Morning, America
DAR = Daughters of the American Revolution

(Sorry, I had to look this up, despite being American, but for the non-American audience and idiots like me, spelling out the initialism would be helpful.)
  #106  
Old 09-08-2019, 10:14 AM
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Actually the stupidest question would be for them to shout, "DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?????'
Some do. There's people who clearly have never understood WHAT THE PHONE IS FOR!
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  #107  
Old 09-08-2019, 12:35 PM
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Again, you do not know the actual questions used and are purely guessing to come up with a excuse that is still very, very inadequate.
I thought you said the question he asked was whether zero was considered positive. Maybe I didn't read your original post very closely.


Quote:
Binary numbers and parity are very important in Computer Science. If you don't know that zero is even you are in deep, deep trouble.
Yes, for parity that is a bit of a problem (no pun intended) because you are forced to choose a 1 or a 0 and one of those will produce an unambiguously wrong answer, so deduction should lead to the other even if the general definition isn't known.
  #108  
Old 09-08-2019, 12:46 PM
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I don't remember what history class it was but in College my professor was adamant that we should actually be referring to the American Revolution as "The American Colonial Civil War" or "The Colonial Secession" because the point of the Revolution wasn't to depose the British Government but rather to just break-away from it.
Dare I say -- without causing 1776 to happen afresh, or wishing to cause same -- that your professor's words, and his position, re this matter as set out above; make good sense to me? I know that you folks generally refer to that historical episode, as the American Revolution; but I -- and, to the best of my knowledge, most of my fellow-Britons -- are in the habit of calling it the American War of Independence. This is not because we think that you ought to have remained then and to this day, subjects of the British Crown -- just that in general, "revolution" tends to connote a change of regime within the whole of one country, coming about by force rather than by consensus.
  #109  
Old 09-08-2019, 02:17 PM
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Of course it's obvious. With the exception of people born on February 29th whose original birth date only exists 25% of the time, no one's birth date varies from year to year.
I don't understand. You originally posted that " Dad and I were both born on Easter..."
Many people think of a birthday as a date, not the title of the day. (This helps when sending cards.)
The day and month of Easter varies from year to year.

(If you announce your birthday is on Mother's Day, your day and month also varies.)
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  #110  
Old 09-08-2019, 02:31 PM
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I don't understand. You originally posted that " Dad and I were both born on Easter..."
Many people think of a birthday as a date, not the title of the day. (This helps when sending cards.)
The day and month of Easter varies from year to year.
And so, clueless people ask if the date of elfkin477's birthday is different each year. The assumption they make is that the birthday always falls on Easter Sunday, not on the same month and date every year.
  #111  
Old 09-08-2019, 04:24 PM
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Almost every time I tell my lion-bite story, someone asks, "Did it hurt?"

I assume they're not complete morons. I assume they're trying to find something to say, and in their shock blurting out the first thing that comes to mind. But still. Did it hurt. No, it was a mild ticklish sensation, barely noticeable. WHAT DO YOU THINK?
  #112  
Old 09-08-2019, 05:36 PM
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I don't understand. You originally posted that " Dad and I were both born on Easter..."
Many people think of a birthday as a date, not the title of the day. (This helps when sending cards.)
The day and month of Easter varies from year to year.

(If you announce your birthday is on Mother's Day, your day and month also varies.)
"Here's your sign"
  #113  
Old 09-08-2019, 05:38 PM
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I was once on an elevator that fell uncontrolled for 30 to 40 stories. More than one person has asked if it hit bottom.
  #114  
Old 09-08-2019, 05:40 PM
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Was it good for you?
  #115  
Old 09-08-2019, 08:53 PM
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Originally Posted by susan View Post
Again, I'm not a medical doctor. As I already posted,
(Bolding added for emphasis.)

To elaborate:

Me: "I had cancer" (in conversational context).
Yutz: "Did they get it all?"
I fail to see how this is a dumb question. A nosy one, perhaps, but not dumb..
  #116  
Old 09-09-2019, 01:43 AM
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Is your name pronounced (or spelled) ___________?

The name they usually cite is wildly different from mine.

Another: Where do you get the ideas for your art?
Just be honest and say "0ther art".
  #117  
Old 09-09-2019, 06:10 AM
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Was it good for you?
So, I stopped at the local library and asked if they had a recently published book about living with a small penis. She told me she didn't think it was in yet.
  #118  
Old 09-09-2019, 06:44 AM
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I have a co-worker that has a desk right next to mine. We share a phone. We have very different responsibilities. His subordinates are always walking up to our area and not seeing Ted, they ask me "Where's Ted?"

I try to be cool about it but I am getting increasingly sarcastic in my response. I have no idea what Ted is doing or where he is. My usual response is to slowly (and pointedly) look around and say "I don't see him." Some of the people that have been around a while have caught on but there is so much churn that there are always new people that think my job is to keep track of where "Ted" is. Sadly a lot of higher ups have the same notion and I have to act like I normally keep track of him but am not sure at the moment.

Not a big deal but after the 10,000th time it gets old.
I share an office with a young engineer who is frequently not at his desk - he's either on the shop floor or outside vaping or who-knows-where. My answer is "It's not my turn to watch him."
  #119  
Old 09-09-2019, 06:54 AM
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I'm in full uniform standing next to a marked squad car and every now and then someone will come up and ask "Are you a police officer".



My standard answer is "what gave it away".

At least during my first career I could say "No, I'm a Deputy Sheriff".

Deer in headlights look.

"What's the difference?"
  #120  
Old 09-09-2019, 08:32 AM
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My sister is an out-and-out lesbian and I am asexual. We both get the same question when people find this out: Why? Can't you get a man? We used to answer "Yes, but I don't want one." Now I just say "What? You think I can't lie down and spread my legs?"

It shuts people up.
  #121  
Old 09-09-2019, 08:51 AM
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Do you want fries with that?

If I wanted fries, I'd have ordered fries! So yeah get me some fries now that you mentioned it.
I have some sympathy for this one. I worked at Taco Bell for years and we'd ask - if they didn't order it - nachos, too. Sometimes they were all " oh, yeah. And a nachos. tHanks. " But other people would get offended and say no and stomp off. Then they'd stomp back up 5 minutes later. "You forgot my nachos!"
  #122  
Old 09-09-2019, 09:37 AM
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As already mentioned, when dressed in a recognisable outfit, like cycling/motorbike gear, "Did you come by bike?" "No, I enjoy running around in spandex/leathers". Yes, I know it's a conversation starter, like "How do you do? (I don't really need an answer)", but it couldn't hurt to try something better.


The "Do you know x" if people hear you're from another town or company. The odd thing is: I think this myself... We visited a restaurant in my old town during the weekend and was wondering if I'd bump into someone I know.
  #123  
Old 09-09-2019, 09:57 AM
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And why exactly is that a dumb question? I mean we do of course, but is that obvious. It always precedes US Thanksgiving by exactly 45 days, incidentally.

The dumbest question I got asked more times than I can count is, "Is this going to be on the exam?" I always say that it might be. Even dumber, "What will be on the exam?" "Everything we did."
My usual response to this is "What you don't know will be on the exam."
  #124  
Old 09-09-2019, 10:10 AM
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My usual response to this is "What you don't know will be on the exam."
I remember my Physics professor being asked if he would provide formulas, or did we have to memorize them all. He told us he would provide everything we needed.

We had a midterm and a final. The morning of the midterm, people were frantically flipping through their exam, searching for the formula list. Someone raised their hand and asked, and he wrote on the chalkboard:

F=ma

He chuckled and said, "There, with that you can derive anything else you need."

He was correct. I got close to 100% on the exam, and the one point I missed was actually a bit of a trick question. But many people were royally pissed off.
  #125  
Old 09-09-2019, 10:17 AM
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Another: Where do you get the ideas for your art?
Do artists in general perceive this as a stupid question? I am not an artist, in fact art (visual, specifically) may as well be magic to me. I have no idea how an artist does what they do nor where they may get inspiration. It is, however, a fascinating subject to me. I am one who asks that very question.
  #126  
Old 09-09-2019, 10:18 AM
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"Do you work here?"

As I'm sitting behind the reception desk in my shirt with the company's logo on it.
  #127  
Old 09-09-2019, 10:28 AM
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Do you want fries with that?

If I wanted fries, I'd have ordered fries!
That used to bother me when I first went to fast-food places, in my early youth (back before the Earth's crust had completely cooled).
Eventually I did simply accept the policy of asking. Unless had I made it clear that the burger was all that I wanted.

Quote:
So yeah get me some fries now that you mentioned it.
It sounds to me that it worked just fine in your case.
  #128  
Old 09-09-2019, 10:42 AM
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When I'm wearing my red shirt, standing behind the cash register ringing up purchases and the light is on. "Are you open?"
  #129  
Old 09-09-2019, 11:20 AM
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"Can you play "Piano Man"?" ... while playing guitar at a gig, party, campfire, etc..

- Yes, but this guitar doesn't have any flats/black keys.
- Yes, but I can't whistle.
- Yes... then play something completely different.
- No, never heard of it.

"Do you work here?"

While picking up supplies/equipment at Home Depot wearing workboots, a sweat shirt and jeans and not a uniform or orange apron.

Last edited by Sparky812; 09-09-2019 at 11:22 AM.
  #130  
Old 09-09-2019, 11:27 AM
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Not really dumb so much as unobservant:

I work at the ticket counter at a museum that also has an Omnimax theater. People will buy tickets for a show and then ask where the theater is- somehow overlooking the huge sign that says "OmniTheater". Since it would be rude to say "where the sign says OmniTheater", I say "where you see the blue neon over there", since the entrance is highlighted by blue neon striping.

They also frequently ask if we have any maps. The stack of pamphlets with "Map" might be a clue. Since they're side by side with other pamphlets I say "the blue ones", since that's what color they are.
  #131  
Old 09-09-2019, 11:32 AM
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"Can you play "Piano Man"?" ... while playing guitar at a gig, party, campfire, etc..
Is there something unique about that piece of music that makes it impossible to play with a guitar?
  #132  
Old 09-09-2019, 11:35 AM
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"Do you know why I pulled you over?"

Because my mind-reading abilities have clearly failed?
  #133  
Old 09-09-2019, 11:37 AM
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"Do you know why I pulled you over?"

Because my mind-reading abilities have clearly failed?
"I assume it's about the dead prostitute in my trunk, but tell me how in the world do you know about it?"
  #134  
Old 09-09-2019, 11:38 AM
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Is there something unique about that piece of music that makes it impossible to play with a guitar?
Whoosh?

Last edited by Sparky812; 09-09-2019 at 11:39 AM.
  #135  
Old 09-09-2019, 11:59 AM
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>> Is zero an even number?

My office mate, the smartest PhD student in our group of rocket scientists, and a very good programmer, paused when I asked him this, and said "Maybe it's a special case?" Simplistically, it's even, and it feels like it should be. But ya never know, in some applications maybe it ought to be handled differently...

This reminds me of a similar situation, where a prof I had asked his students an exam question (for an aerodynamics class 25 years ago) to provide a basic definition for the "energy of a flowing gas." Almost all of us provided the expression for enthalpy. He's like "No no, that's not it, I'm only interested in energy." Disappointed, he then asked a number of his Aero/Astro colleagues, who also provided the definition for enthalpy.

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I'm a lesbian who had a child young, and the ex I had when my daughter was very young coincidentally looked a lot more like my daughter than I did - they both have straight blonde hair and similarly shaped and eyes and face (and we all have blue eyes). So I didn't mind when people assumed she was the biological mother - it was a reasonable assumption. And it happened quite a lot. People would get confused about my daughter calling me Mum and my ex by her name and they'd decide to find out why, or they were just curious, or whatever.
My wife has dark hair and eyes, and tans well. I'm pale: red/blond, blue eyes, freckles / burns instantly when outdoors anywhere south of Seattle. When my son was a baby he was similarly pale, blue-eyed, etc. Whenever I had him out and about, nobody questioned my being his father. (He was a "mini me.") But when wifey had him out and about, hiking, shopping, whatever, people would sometimes assume she was his nanny. This got her irritated (and concerned that someone might take him away).

Last edited by Limmin; 09-09-2019 at 12:02 PM.
  #136  
Old 09-09-2019, 12:13 PM
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I don't remember what history class it was but in College my professor was adamant that we should actually be referring to the American Revolution as "The American Colonial Civil War" or "The Colonial Secession" because the point of the Revolution wasn't to depose the British Government but rather to just break-away from it.
This might be a "history teacher meme", because I had a U.S. History professor in college who told us that the American Revolution and American Civil War ought to switch names.

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Orthodox, or Western?

Regards,
Shodan
Orthodox. NO! Catholic! AAAAAAAAAA....
  #137  
Old 09-09-2019, 12:39 PM
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I run a Pizzeria in St Louis...

The most common (in my opinion STUPID) question I get asked is "How Big is a 14" Pizza" or How big is an 18" pizza"....ummm "14" or 18" inches in diameter, respectively"
Given that a two-by-four is not two inches by four inches, it's not unreasonable to wonder whether a 14" or 18" pizza is actually 14 or 18 inches across.
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  #138  
Old 09-09-2019, 12:57 PM
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"I assume it's about the dead prostitute in my trunk, but tell me how in the world do you know about it?"
LMAO! But you would be in soooo much trouble if you did.
  #139  
Old 09-09-2019, 01:42 PM
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Do you want fries with that?

If I wanted fries, I'd have ordered fries! So yeah get me some fries now that you mentioned it.
I worked at a McDonald's in the 1980s. A complete meal was considered to include sandwich+fries+drink; if a customer's order didn't include all three, we were required to suggest whatever was missing.

See "suggestive selling". While perhaps annoying to some customers who are very certain about what they want, it did increase revenue overall, which is why we had to ask.
  #140  
Old 09-09-2019, 01:52 PM
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To the OP, I don't have any questions per se that stick out in my memory, but I have on two separate occasions had mothers decide that the best way to manage getting both their library books and their infant children from the car into the library was to bring the infant in, wordlessly place it in its carrier thingy on the desk in front of me, then attempt to leave the building to park their car and return with their books.
I worked the front desk of a library for some time, and I never saw that happen. Hunh.
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  #141  
Old 09-09-2019, 02:02 PM
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I worked the front desk of a library for some time, and I never saw that happen. Hunh.
I don't know of anyone it's ever happened to but me, which makes it happening twice all the more bizarre.
  #142  
Old 09-09-2019, 02:28 PM
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I run a Pizzeria in St Louis...

The most common (in my opinion STUPID) question I get asked is "How Big is a 14" Pizza" or How big is an 18" pizza"....ummm "14" or 18" inches in diameter, respectively"
Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve MB View Post
Given that a two-by-four is not two inches by four inches, it's not unreasonable to wonder whether a 14" or 18" pizza is actually 14 or 18 inches across.
No, that is a dumb question. That's like asking, "What flavor is the pineapple soda?"
  #143  
Old 09-09-2019, 02:45 PM
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I have a co-worker that has a desk right next to mine. We share a phone. We have very different responsibilities. His subordinates are always walking up to our area and not seeing Ted, they ask me "Where's Ted?"

I try to be cool about it but I am getting increasingly sarcastic in my response. I have no idea what Ted is doing or where he is. My usual response is to slowly (and pointedly) look around and say "I don't see him." Some of the people that have been around a while have caught on but there is so much churn that there are always new people that think my job is to keep track of where "Ted" is. Sadly a lot of higher ups have the same notion and I have to act like I normally keep track of him but am not sure at the moment.

Not a big deal but after the 10,000th time it gets old.
Many years ago, my co-workers and I had the same problem. I've posted before about how we solved the problem (see here), but I'll post it again:

Quote:
... We posted it [a sign] on the door to our six-cube room so anybody entering couldn't miss it:

Are you coming to see if Neil is in?

If so, check if one of the following answers your questions before you bother Neil's co-workers:

-- We don't know where Neil is.

-- We don't know when he will return.

-- We don't know where he left his files/documents/football picks.

-- We don't know when he last checked his e-mail or phone messages.

-- Got something for him? Leave it on his desk where he cannot miss it. Don't give it to us.

-- Leave Neil your instructions about the package you're leaving for him. He will accept voice messages, e-mails, or brief handwritten notes. Don't leave us instructions to be passed along to Neil at our discretion and/or on our schedule.

In short, if Neil's not here, leave us alone. We can't help you.


It actually worked pretty well, as I recall.
  #144  
Old 09-09-2019, 02:57 PM
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Originally Posted by ThisSpaceForRent View Post
I run a Pizzeria in St Louis...

The most common (in my opinion STUPID) question I get asked is "How Big is a 14" Pizza" or How big is an 18" pizza"....ummm "14" or 18" inches in diameter, respectively"
Quote:
Originally Posted by cochrane View Post
No, that is a dumb question. That's like asking, "What flavor is the pineapple soda?"
The not-so-dumb part of it, IMHO, is that some people have trouble visualizing a circle that is 14" or 18" across. Some pizza places display different-sized pizza pans, or just painted circles, to show people what the different pizza sizes look like.
  #145  
Old 09-09-2019, 03:00 PM
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"Can you play "Piano Man"?" ... while playing guitar at a gig, party, campfire, etc..
I've been playing guitar for 50 years and guess I should count myself fortunate that no one has ever asked me that question.
  #146  
Old 09-09-2019, 03:38 PM
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This is part of a question, rather than a full question. For many years I worked with US colleagues or clients, and several times I have been asked something-or-other about "British African-Americans".

Yes, I know it's a bit unfair - they are just being decent, sensitive people and forgetting who they are asking (albeit in a rather odd way). Hard to know quite how to answer, though.

j
  #147  
Old 09-09-2019, 05:05 PM
begbert2 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas View Post
When I'm wearing my red shirt, standing behind the cash register ringing up purchases and the light is on. "Are you open?"
Given how many times I've walked up to an apparently open register ringing somebody up only to have them tell me they're closed, I'm not sure I can blame the people for asking.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Limmin View Post
>> Is zero an even number?

My office mate, the smartest PhD student in our group of rocket scientists, and a very good programmer, paused when I asked him this, and said "Maybe it's a special case?" Simplistically, it's even, and it feels like it should be. But ya never know, in some applications maybe it ought to be handled differently...
In most programming applications 0 is handled differently from other outputs. The thing that's not common, though, is looking for even/odd numbers. So as a dude who's a couple decades away from an exam and who just yesterday wrote special handling to cover a 0 output, it's not hard at all to imagine a test question where 0 might need special handling.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Doctor Jackson View Post
Do artists in general perceive this as a stupid question? I am not an artist, in fact art (visual, specifically) may as well be magic to me. I have no idea how an artist does what they do nor where they may get inspiration. It is, however, a fascinating subject to me. I am one who asks that very question.
If you asked me that, you'd get a long and ever-growing list of all the things I've ripped off.

Last edited by begbert2; 09-09-2019 at 05:06 PM.
  #148  
Old 09-09-2019, 05:31 PM
carrps is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by pulykamell View Post
GMA = Good Morning, America
DAR = Daughters of the American Revolution

(Sorry, I had to look this up, despite being American, but for the non-American audience and idiots like me, spelling out the initialism would be helpful.)
But you didn't translate NYC.
  #149  
Old 09-09-2019, 08:26 PM
Melbourne is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jaycat View Post
I've been playing guitar for 50 years and guess I should count myself fortunate that no one has ever asked me that question.
50 years is Back Before the Internet. But now, if you wanted to learn the guitar chords for Piano Man, you'd just go to youtube or tabs.ultimate-guitar.com
  #150  
Old 09-09-2019, 08:50 PM
pulykamell is online now
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Location: SW Side, Chicago
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Melbourne View Post
50 years is Back Before the Internet. But now, if you wanted to learn the guitar chords for Piano Man, you'd just go to youtube or tabs.ultimate-guitar.com
Or, here you go (Youtube lesson.) Note one of the comments: "Just had someone ask me if I played Piano Man...thanks for helping me expand my repertoire Marty!!

Yes, I know (or assume) the original post was a joke, but despite the song being about a piano player at a bar, I think it still sounds fine played on guitar (actually, listening to various acoustic guitar covers on Youtube, I may prefer it on guitar, but I'm not particularly fond of the song itself, despite piano being my main instrument.)
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