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  #51  
Old 09-06-2019, 02:01 AM
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In a zoo I used o work in, we had some, well, interesting applicants pretty often. It seems some tutors translate 'can't work with people' into 'should work with animals!'

At one point we had an applicant whose entire qualification for animal care was 'I used to have a goldfish'. Not a joke. We had applications which listed which animals they were prepared to work with basically 'mammals OK, birds tolerable, reptiles and invertebrates are icky and I won't work with them'. We had a guy with no work experience or qualifications who sent in the application on Monday, then showed up every day for over a week asking 'Can I start yet?' at reception. We think he was living kinda feral, because he got grubbier and grubbier over the week as well.

One of the very early staff there, supposedly animal care staff, declared that cleaning wasn't his job (he was a MAN! cleaning was WOMEN's work!), he only had to prep food and put it in the already clean bowls. He also used to show up slightly late every day, then make himself a coffee and sit there reading a newspaper for half an hour before deigning to start (most of the current animal staff routinely show up somewhere between a half an hour and an hour earlier than timetabled, for which they're not paid- stay late to finish off and you get you paid for it, show up before you're scheduled and that's on you, but that's how keen most of them are).

We also had someone apply as a volunteer who wanted to work with the animals. So far so normal. There were already plenty of volunteers working with the animals, the only volunteer role we were looking to fill at the time was site maintenance, stuff like helping paint fences and sheds. She was told this, with the comment that it would involve a little interaction with the animals, and existing volunteers got priority for new positions, so if she wanted to do that for a while, she'd be first in line if something suitable did come up. She blew up. How DARE they suggest things like that, she wanted to work with ANIMALS. Then she got her big sister to phone up and complain as well. They were both in their 50s, incidentally.
  #52  
Old 09-06-2019, 03:50 AM
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I work at a hotel. We have overnight security. One guy got fired because he sat in the break room for 90% of his shift with his walkie-talkie off. My night engineer ran across him doing that and got him fired. (Management ignored my complaints about the security guard for months before this happened because they were terrible managers.)

We had some sort of construction crew staying with us once and one guy got massively drunk and came up to complain about how he got sunburned and our soap was not solving this issue (really). He got really really aggressive and I was busy trying to calm him down when a guest came up for a toothbrush. She heard his drunk mostly incoherent accusations and stick around. I was mortified - this was not what I wanted a guest to hear! Finally my security guard and I got him calmed down and security escorted him back to his room. The woman left as well, and came back with her brother... The head of the construction crew and I think the owner of the business. He asked some questions, and I told the truth and when I got into work the next night drunk bozo was gone.
  #53  
Old 09-06-2019, 06:28 AM
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Originally Posted by Asuka View Post
Has anyone in history ever gotten Halloween off though? Schools don't get it off (which is where most people get their idea of "off" holidays from) and most people would be already off work by the time Halloween festivities started.
For a while I gave employees an hour off with pay on election days. I thought it was a good idea and would inspire people to vote who otherwise wouldn't, plus maybe create interest in politics. The idea was a total failure. Everyone enjoyed their hour off, but nobody used it as intended. Nobody.
  #54  
Old 09-06-2019, 08:05 AM
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Originally Posted by Tim@T-Bonham.net View Post
In parochial schools, you got the next day off. (So you could eat all the candy, and get sick at home, not in school, I guess.)
Not to eat candy, but because Nov 1 is All Saints Day, a Catholic religious holiday.

[Since "Hallowed" is an old word for "Blessed", All Saints Day was sometimes known as All Hallows Day. The night before of course was the Evening of All Hallows Day (for some reason abbreviated "e'en", while Christmas Evening turned to "Eve"). And there was a sort of folk tale belief about wicked spirits/the dead/etc getting to roam the earth for one night before the Saints Day cleaned everything up. Obviously, that eventually that led to children getting sick on candy]
  #55  
Old 09-06-2019, 08:14 AM
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My current job is in a store owned by Orthodox Jews. Friday and especially Sunday (being outsifde of our county's blue laws) are our busiest days. The first question anyone interviewing for a job is asked is "Are you free to work all day Fridays and Sundays?" If the answer is "no," they are not hired.

Yet some people say "yes," and then start calling in about not being abler to come to work those days. After the third time, they are let go.
  #56  
Old 09-06-2019, 09:08 PM
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It's not stupid, but it's common enough that I've seen it a few times: people that think they should be doing something "useful" at work. I get to explain to them that they aren't paid to feel useful, they're paid to do something the owner thinks is useful. If that means just waiting, or even sitting at reception waiting for the phone to ring, it is what it is.

Sometimes they get it: sometimes they don't.
  #57  
Old 09-06-2019, 10:03 PM
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Heh. In the Colorado county that I work for, we used to get Columbus Day off. A commission was unhappy with that, as Columbus, was, well a bit of an asshole I suppose. Said commissioner got it renamed to "Indigenous Peoples Day". Us white folks of western European ancestry get it off too.

I think it's a nice gesture I guess, but I suppose some sap will ask for "Indigenous Peoples Day off" after he leaves current employment.
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  #58  
Old 09-06-2019, 10:12 PM
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It's not precisely employment, but kind of like that: Under the Compact of Free Association, a document that governs the relationship between the United States and the Federated States of Micronesia, citizens of the FSM can be treated like US citizens in many ways. For example, they can join the US military.

So, a military recruiter was on Pohnpei (the FSM's capital island) one day, speaking to a group of Micronesian young men and extolling the virtues of joining the military. One potential recruit had a question: "So, if we join the army, and the US gets into a war ... do we have to fight?"
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  #59  
Old 09-07-2019, 02:35 AM
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Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas View Post
My current job is in a store owned by Orthodox Jews. Friday and especially Sunday (being outsifde of our county's blue laws) are our busiest days. The first question anyone interviewing for a job is asked is "Are you free to work all day Fridays and Sundays?" If the answer is "no," they are not hired.

Yet some people say "yes," and then start calling in about not being abler to come to work those days. After the third time, they are let go.
I worked at a catalog call center for a couple of years and they told you during the open house for prospective employees that you were expected to work every other weekend. If you couldn't do that, there was no point in applying. They did accept people who wouldn't/couldn't work either Saturdays or Sundays but were willing to work every weekend day they could work instead. So someone who always wanted every Sunday off for Church but was willing to work every Saturday was fine. Lots of high schoolers with Saturday sports worked every Sunday.

And yet people would get hired and then try to get every weekend off. They never lasted long.
  #60  
Old 09-07-2019, 08:16 AM
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Another story about somebody who had trouble with the subject of days off.

I worked in a prison. Anyone who gave a moment's thought to it would figure out that a prison is a twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, three hundred and sixty five days a year business. There is never a time when we close.
Surely you gave snow days, though, right, in the case of a blizzard?

Sorry, being facetious. I used to work at a hospital and the number of people who were genuinely surprised that we didn't give people "snow days" was astounding. Oh, ok, I'll just tell Mr. Smith in room 1017 that he can't have medication or a meal or someone to help him to the bathroom because you all think we should close down when it snows.
  #61  
Old 09-07-2019, 10:23 PM
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My father had an employee who asked if they got the Monday after Easter off, because "Easter falls on a Sunday this year".

Regards,
Shodan
My last job at a unionized industrial plant had Good Friday as a holiday. Third shift started Sunday nights and after many years finally were able to get Good Friday holiday moved to Easter Sunday night.
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  #62  
Old 09-07-2019, 10:30 PM
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At one point, I worked for a large computer company as an IT consultant. One year, we received the list of holidays for the next year, including for the offices working on the account from Mexico, Romania and India. I was amused and slightly annoyed to find that the office in India got Good Friday off but we in the US did not.
  #63  
Old 09-07-2019, 10:36 PM
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Originally Posted by CairoCarol View Post
It's not precisely employment, but kind of like that: Under the Compact of Free Association, a document that governs the relationship between the United States and the Federated States of Micronesia, citizens of the FSM can be treated like US citizens in many ways. For example, they can join the US military.

So, a military recruiter was on Pohnpei (the FSM's capital island) one day, speaking to a group of Micronesian young men and extolling the virtues of joining the military. One potential recruit had a question: "So, if we join the army, and the US gets into a war ... do we have to fight?"


I'm sure there are a lot of Americans who don't realize that either.

You work in a pharmacy? Yes, we have drugs here. No, you can't have them unless a doctor prescribes them.
  #64  
Old 09-07-2019, 11:11 PM
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Reading applications for teaching jobs, I was shocked to see how many people think teaching requires no qualifications (despite minimum qualifications, such as a degree related to the major, having been posted in the announcement to which they were responding). I was also stunned how many claimed a license or certificate in the field, but were not to be found in the state's certification database, or had an expired license, or had substantiated complaints on their record. Did they think we wouldn't check this?

Last edited by susan; 09-07-2019 at 11:12 PM.
  #65  
Old 09-08-2019, 12:31 AM
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Surely you gave snow days, though, right, in the case of a blizzard?

Sorry, being facetious. I used to work at a hospital and the number of people who were genuinely surprised that we didn't give people "snow days" was astounding. Oh, ok, I'll just tell Mr. Smith in room 1017 that he can't have medication or a meal or someone to help him to the bathroom because you all think we should close down when it snows.
Not a co-worker situation but work related.

Remember the 2003 blackout? I was at work and we lost regular power in my area. But as a prison, we had emergency generators so we had power. But we wanted to cut down on the amount of power we were using and one of the things we did was shut down all of the washers and dryers.

I later had a prisoner complain about having the washers and dryers shut off without notice. He demanded that in the future everyone should be given an hour's advance notice.

I told him, "If I had known there was going to be a blackout an hour before it happened, I would have told the governor not you."

This reminds me of another work related story that involves a co-worker (actually my boss). We had been issued digital cameras to use whenever we needed to take pictures of anything at work. But we still had the older film cameras and a finite inventory of film.

My boss decided that pictures on film were better than pictures on a memory card because they were more admissible as evidence in court. But he didn't want to use up all of our film. So he set a policy; we were supposed to use the film camera for important things but not use it for unimportant things. I wasn't going to let that slide so I pushed him for a more definitive standard (otherwise he would have followed his usual practice of second-guessing my decisions weeks after I had made them). He kept trying to avoid committing himself but he finally issued a standard; we were supposed to take film pictures anytime we would need them as evidence later in court.

I asked him if he understood how time worked.
  #66  
Old 09-08-2019, 04:50 AM
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Can I expand this to students with unrealistic expectations? I run the Emergency Medicine rotation for medical students. Had one guy ask if he could work only days. Um, no. Not only should common sense tell you the the ED is a 24/7 experience, the course description says that nights and weekends are required. Besides which, if you’re looking for a days only specialty choice for your career why is EM on your list at all?
Yes sounds interesting.

Reminds me of all my friends who graduated high school in 2002 and proceeded to get all sorts of "out-there" college degrees and then expected immediate 6 figure jobs for them. My friend got a Music Theory Bachelors Degree and then spent two years with his band thinking getting a degree somehow made him more "desirable" to hire for social events and what not. Then the 2008 US recession hit and suddenly even whatever small job opportunity they had evaporated.
  #67  
Old 09-08-2019, 08:55 AM
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At one place we had a nice part-time person teaching some of the Computer Literacy sections. Better them then me.

When we had a regular tenure-track positions open up, she'd apply. But no PhD, no consideration.

Suddenly had a PhD one year. Checking: Yep, an online diploma mill. No, that doesn't count. We check these things. (Sadly, others still wanted to move the application forward despite the fraud. Others wanted a termination for fraud. It was an unexpected battle. You lie on your vita? Goodbye!)
  #68  
Old 09-08-2019, 01:26 PM
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One job I was at we used to rotate being on call for the client. Everybody took one week out of every seven to cover emergencies. One person, during her first on-call week, turned the on-call pager off because she was tired and needed a good night's rest. Without telling anyone.
A partner in our pathology practice was on call one weekend. He was paged to cover a problem, and called back saying he was at the airport about to leave on a trip. Sorry fellas, can't help you, gotta go, g'bye.
  #69  
Old 09-08-2019, 04:24 PM
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20 years ago I worked - briefly - with an entry level sys admin with no college degree. He thought that eventually he'd work his way up to CIO - that there was a career progression from low level sys admin with no college degree to upper management at Fortune 100.

He got fired when he spoke to the IT press (this was back when Computer World subscriptions were a thing) for telling them what IT strategy was - i.e. what we were going to do with our networks. Of course, he had no idea what IT strategy was, no exposure to long term corporate planning or budgets. That sort of thing has stock implications - when you imply that the company will be spending hundreds of millions of dollars to change directions - for no reason.
  #70  
Old 09-08-2019, 05:54 PM
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My brother is a company president, and over his career, he's been a CPA, CFO, VP, and CEO at various companies for 40+ years. In that time, he got his MBA, and he's taught some business classes at a local university. He's had articles written about him and he's been headhunted many times - he's good at what he does.

A few years back, one of his younger employees came to him to be mentored, and my bro decided to discuss it with him. My brother asked him: "What's your 5-year plan?" The lad said "I see myself in your job." Yep, this kid a couple of years out of college thought it was realistic for him to become the president of a major company before he was 30. Bro explained to him what it took to get to that position, and the kid didn't like the answer. He quit a few months later.

It's nice to have goals, but dang!!!
  #71  
Old 09-08-2019, 06:08 PM
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Originally Posted by FairyChatMom View Post
I worked with an engineer (no clue how he graduated) who used race and his friendship with the engineer union rep to keep from getting fired for years. They just shuffled him from one office to another, till one boss finally started keeping records. He told me about the last straw, and that waste of oxygen was finally terminated. Last I heard, he was working at Home Depot.
I understand this is a different topic than the OP, but I thought I would chime in with my experience.

I work with lots of people who (supposedly) have engineering degrees. But I would call less than 50% of them "engineers." I worked with someone for many years who had a degree in mechanical engineering. He couldn't do the simplest math. He had no understanding of F = ma. I currently work with people w/ EE degrees who would not be able to solve for the voltages in a voltage divider.

I have no idea how these people got the degrees.

This would be an excellent topic for a new thread, IMO.
  #72  
Old 09-08-2019, 07:11 PM
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Reading applications for teaching jobs, I was shocked to see how many people think teaching requires no qualifications (despite minimum qualifications, such as a degree related to the major, having been posted in the announcement to which they were responding). I was also stunned how many claimed a license or certificate in the field, but were not to be found in the state's certification database, or had an expired license, or had substantiated complaints on their record. Did they think we wouldn't check this?
Oh god, we were hiring a guidance counselor once upon a time. The applications were horrendous. Under "experience" they would have "Counselor at X School district" and then a 40-item list of every routine, mundane job responsibility that literally every counselor had. What they wouldn't list was the name of the school (probably because the non-education specific template didn't tell them to) and that would literally be the only thing we needed to know. They would list "Proficient in Word and Excel", I assume because that same template was from 2004. They would be typo-ridden--and I really don't care about a few typos in resumes and cover letters; IMHO that's a dumb way to filter. But these would be on-going and egregious. Under skills, people listed "professional in appearance and dress"; under certifications, they listed "Wedding planner". They would put inspirational quotes and testimonials from their references in sidebars, sometimes in "cursive" fonts.

It's like they had no idea what a resume was FOR or who would be reading it or what that person might want to know.
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Old 09-08-2019, 07:22 PM
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Yup.
  #74  
Old 09-08-2019, 08:07 PM
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There was a girl who worked at the shelter who was very sweet and very keen and always really wanted to chat with me while I was trying to work.

Anyway, at some point, she decided that she wanted to be a vet tech, too, just like me! (ok great plz go back to your section and leave me alone) And she'd yammer on and on about how she wanted to go to vet tech school and how she figured she'd need letters of recommendation and blah blah blah blah. So one day, they let her shadow the other tech during surgery. She was, naturally, over the moon excited.
The day after, she came bubbling up to me all, "Have you ever done a cat spay? Ohmigod, I almost passed out! I can't stand the sight of blood! It was so gross!" ... It... It's surgery.

Not only that, but like... okay, you might be thinking, "maybe Dorothy is just being mean and cat spays are especially traumatic blood baths! Maybe she was prepared for surgery, but they threw her into a horror show!" They're not. Standard cat spays are pretty tidy. There's some blood involved because it's... you know... surgery. But really very little and it mostly stays in the cat. Even dog spays are worse.
She stopped talking about wanting to be a vet tech (although she still talked constantly about everything else under the sun) after that. I truly am not sure what she thought was involved with surgery if not a little blood and guts, but... apparently, it wasn't for her.
  #75  
Old 09-08-2019, 08:46 PM
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I did a major career change at 27, and then a career adjustment a couple of years later. Both times, I was starting near the bottom, but I had years more experience in the work world than my fellow bottom-feeders. Some things I had already learned that they were shocked by:

If you take time off, either for illness or vacation, your work does not automatically do itself. In fact, you'll find even more work waiting for you when you return.

It doesn't matter if you were on your way to an important meeting, the company will not pay for your speeding or parking tickets.

Save your receipts and fill out your expense report right after you incur the expense. Don't wait until the end of the month.

Maybe your supervisor isn't always right, but when your supervisor also is the person signing your paycheck, they're the closest thing to infallible this side of the Pope.
  #76  
Old 09-08-2019, 09:29 PM
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I was an idiot.

I had a job in college working for the Engineering department. I was good with typing and proofreading, but one day somebody asked me to make 15 copies of something and collate it.

Do what?

I had to look it up. "Collate."

The crazy thing of course is that, absent that instruction, I would have collated it, as a matter of course, just because I know no one wants 15 pages of page one, stacked on top of 15 copies of page two, etc. But I had never encountered the word.

(I looked it up because I didn't want to look stupid, because I was a smart college student.)

Welp that's what I learned in college. A couple of weeks later I learned that you could actually make the copier do the collating. There was a button that said, "COLLATE." I had probably seen that button and wondered: "What does THIS do? Hm..."
Heh, I'm so old I can remember working with copy machines that didn't collate automatically. There were these expandable metal contraptions that you used to do the manual concatenation. Pain in the butt!!!!!

I remember a guy that was hired as a software engineer (back in the heyday of the big IBM mainframes). He apparently interviewed really well. I thought he was a bit of a blowhard. Over the months, they started moving him around. And every move was to a lower level job. Finally, he was almost exclusively assigned as coordinator of our United Way/Employee Contributions project (a BIG deal at my company). That year I got assigned as his assistant -- on top of my regular job -- and I did 90% of the work. He was such an ass. What made it worse was that management was so chickensh*t that with all the downward moves, they never adjusted his salary downward to match.
  #77  
Old 09-08-2019, 09:49 PM
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Yes sounds interesting.

Reminds me of all my friends who graduated high school in 2002 and proceeded to get all sorts of "out-there" college degrees and then expected immediate 6 figure jobs for them. My friend got a Music Theory Bachelors Degree and then spent two years with his band thinking getting a degree somehow made him more "desirable" to hire for social events and what not. Then the 2008 US recession hit and suddenly even whatever small job opportunity they had evaporated.
It's nothing new. I'm 20 years older than you and saw plenty of that back in the day? You're majoring in art history, religion, etc. and you have no plans to teach or preach? Good luck paying back your $7,000 in loans.

OTOH, another change in pharmacy practice that prompted me to take a hike was the recent, not-uncommon practice of hiring new graduates as a pharmacist-in-charge. It sounds like yet another way to get somebody who doesn't know what they're doing into a job that nobody who would know would want anyway.
  #78  
Old 09-08-2019, 09:54 PM
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Straight out of high school in the 1970s, I worked for a while as the night baker at the local Dunkin' Donuts. They hired a student at the local university for the graveyard shift on the counter. His duties included finishing the doughnuts I baked. Now, this was not a stupid man. From Pakistan, he was a scholarship student in mechanical engineering. And a really nice guy to boot. But every night for a week -- every, single, night -- we had to show him how to a) pick up doughnut; b) dip doughnut in flavored icing; c) place doughnut on tray. Every, single, night. After a week, they let him go.
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  #79  
Old 09-09-2019, 12:40 AM
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Originally Posted by Crafter_Man View Post
I work with lots of people who (supposedly) have engineering degrees. But I would call less than 50% of them "engineers." I worked with someone for many years who had a degree in mechanical engineering. He couldn't do the simplest math. He had no understanding of F = ma. I currently work with people w/ EE degrees who would not be able to solve for the voltages in a voltage divider.
Everybody in The Basque Team had STEM degrees; Sheboss was supposedly a mechanical engineer. Supposedly. She had been given that specific assignment because it made a belt-notch that HR reckoned she needed, before sending her back to taking care of wet-behind-the-ears people: managing self-starters wasn't something she was suited for. Or doing any kind of process design: she'd see us working on the process diagrams and ask "what the heck are you doing, you should be working!" and "what's that picture? Why aren't you working?"

Some people seem to get their degree not so much on account of having proven that they understand the subject matter as on account of having memorized enough of each individual course to collect a bunch of bare-passes. A bunch of bare-passes may get you the pretty paper, but it doesn't mean you're capable of doing the job.
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Last edited by Nava; 09-09-2019 at 12:41 AM.
  #80  
Old 09-09-2019, 12:36 PM
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A lot of people don't seem to understand just how much goes in to professional social media.

I had to hire a social media manager and I received hundreds of applications ranging anywhere from babysitters to cooks and everything in between. Not one of them had any kind of previous job experience in social media, but would always list "Active on Twitter and Instagram" under "skills".

There is so much more to social media than just seeing something and retweeting or commenting on it or just posting stuff. Just because it's easy as a hobby doesn't mean it's easy as a job.

On a bit of a side note: It's kinda sad seeing the state of some of the resumes I got. This was an entry-level job that, by all accounts, wasn't the most prestigious in the world, and I still got some really bad resumes from people. I felt so sorry for them because I can tell they're trying to make a change in their life, but they're just firing their resume at anything they can...
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  #81  
Old 09-09-2019, 02:29 PM
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Originally Posted by Tim@T-Bonham.net View Post
In parochial schools, you got the next day off.
Well yes, November 1 is All Saints Day (Halloween - referred originally to as All Hallows Eve in the past - is the night before), so I'd expect a parochial school to have it off.

Last edited by ISiddiqui; 09-09-2019 at 02:32 PM.
  #82  
Old 09-09-2019, 02:41 PM
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Though speaking of days off... I work for the US Government. It is very interesting to see the number of people who get surprised that we don't get the day after Thanksgiving off (it's not a federal holiday).
  #83  
Old 09-09-2019, 02:55 PM
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Originally Posted by ISiddiqui View Post
Though speaking of days off... I work for the US Government. It is very interesting to see the number of people who get surprised that we don't get the day after Thanksgiving off (it's not a federal holiday).
So that's why the garbage truck came on Friday last Thanksgiving. I thought they'll be off till next week.
  #84  
Old 09-09-2019, 03:48 PM
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Originally Posted by ISiddiqui View Post
Though speaking of days off... I work for the US Government. It is very interesting to see the number of people who get surprised that we don't get the day after Thanksgiving off (it's not a federal holiday).
Our library changed holidays a few years ago to match the county government's holidays, so we now are closed on the day after Thanksgiving because county government is. We also have Good Friday and Easter Sunday off now.

Only it apparently never occurred to anyone that we're open on weekends, unlike county government. So for Thanksgiving, we're closed for two days, then open again. For Easter, it's even crazier because we closed for Good Friday, open on Saturday, then closed again for Easter Sunday.

This was sold as making it "simpler."
  #85  
Old 09-09-2019, 04:26 PM
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I understand this is a different topic than the OP, but I thought I would chime in with my experience.

I work with lots of people who (supposedly) have engineering degrees. But I would call less than 50% of them "engineers." I worked with someone for many years who had a degree in mechanical engineering. He couldn't do the simplest math. He had no understanding of F = ma. I currently work with people w/ EE degrees who would not be able to solve for the voltages in a voltage divider.

I have no idea how these people got the degrees.

This would be an excellent topic for a new thread, IMO.
I was an English Lit major, and even I knew this one!
  #86  
Old 09-10-2019, 04:23 PM
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Originally Posted by KneadToKnow View Post
Our library changed holidays a few years ago to match the county government's holidays, so we now are closed on the day after Thanksgiving because county government is. We also have Good Friday and Easter Sunday off now.

Only it apparently never occurred to anyone that we're open on weekends, unlike county government. So for Thanksgiving, we're closed for two days, then open again. For Easter, it's even crazier because we closed for Good Friday, open on Saturday, then closed again for Easter Sunday.

This was sold as making it "simpler."
The library I work in closes on Easter Sunday. It does not close on Black Friday though. The cafe I work in is closed that day however, the only weekday we are closed and the library isn't. The library closes on all federal holidays and also New Year's Eve, and Christmas Eve.
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  #87  
Old 09-10-2019, 05:57 PM
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You work in a pharmacy? Yes, we have drugs here. No, you can't have them unless a doctor prescribes them.
To be fair, pharmacists in other parts of the world can totally dispense some drugs without a physician or other third party’s involvement. I learned this while I was living in France. A few years later, I was visiting Paris with a girlfriend when she developed a UTI. I explained the issue to a female while my girlfriend stood there. She got a course of antibiotics on the spot.
  #88  
Old 09-10-2019, 06:03 PM
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Another story

I work in a warehouse than also has a "public" section with offices in the front. Two years ago an old man (probably in his 60's) applied to the job and got it in the warehouse portion. This was a section that worked 24 hours a day and had 3 shifts and you would come in to work and immediately relieve the shift before you.

Apparently the old guy thought the first week on the job he could show up on time, but instead of relieving the prior shift he could go make himself a cup of coffee and then go into the office section and drink it while sitting down and talking with various people for up to 30 to 40 minutes before finally making his way to his section. Then in addition to this, he wouldn't wait for his own relief and would leave work 30 minutes early leaving his area abandoned until the next shift showed up. Obviously the people he was suppose to relieve got very VERY pissed at this so they complained and by the end of the week he had a serious talking to by management. Then for the next two weeks he started to loudly gripe and complain to everyone who would listen how in his prior jobs "Guys have an understanding that everyone comes in late and to just cover for them with no complaining" not understanding he also wasn't following his advice and just leaving early instead of waiting for the next shift. About two months into his job he suddenly complains of an old injury and work gave him a menial job in the office portion just to shut him up. Now he spends his days hanging out in the mens restroom and talking to anybody who walks in about how his day has been going and commenting "Back so soon?" if you happen to see him in the restroom again which happens to be all the time because that guy is literally in the restroom at all hours of his shift.
  #89  
Old 09-10-2019, 07:18 PM
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Originally Posted by Crafter_Man View Post
I would call less than 50% of them "engineers." I worked with someone for many years who had a degree in mechanical engineering. He couldn't do the simplest math. He had no understanding of F = ma. I currently work with people w/ EE degrees who would not be able to solve for the voltages in a voltage divider.

I have no idea how these people got the degrees.
Last night, I was helping a fellow mechanical engineer calculate the area of an arbitrary cross section; he complained that he kept getting the wrong answer. He walked me through his math:

- first find the perimeter and divide it by pi to get the diameter;

- divide the diameter by 2 to get the radius;

- square the radius and multiply it by pi to get the area.

I thought I was missing something big, so I let him get all the way through his explanation before I interjected.

I then pointed out that his formulae worked for circles but not for any other shape. (The cross-section was vaguely trapezoidal). He still wasn’t convinced, so I asked him to point to the “diameter” for which he had solved. That did it.

Another mechanical engineer I worked with didn’t know that springs in series behave differently than springs in parallel.

The first guy is a decent person who cranks out solid mechanical drawings at a pace I can’t dream of matching. The second guy is reasonably OK at building and maintaining project-management spreadsheets.

Both are incompetent at the things I’m good at, but only the second guy is an incompetent engineer (IMHO). The first guy graciously takes responsibility when he’s wrong, learns from his mistakes and tries not to get in over his head. The second guy insists that others are fools for thinking he’s mistaken. And as usual, he’s mistaken about that.
  #90  
Old 09-10-2019, 07:25 PM
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I explained the issue to a female while my girlfriend stood there.
Ugh. I hate when people refer to human women as “females.” I meant to write “female pharmacist.” We sought one out because we thought a male pharmacist might not be as sympathetic to a woman with a UTI.
  #91  
Old 09-10-2019, 08:35 PM
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Ugh. I hate when people refer to human women as “females.” I meant to write “female pharmacist.” We sought one out because we thought a male pharmacist might not be as sympathetic to a woman with a UTI.
This human woman forgives you Going a bit off topic, your story reminds me of a similar one my parents experienced, except for the essential detail that I infer you spoke French. Many years ago my parents were in Bali when my mother got a yeast infection, and my dad gallantly tried to get something like Monostat from the apotik for her.

My dad was a charming guy, and while he wasn't the least bit arrogant, he was supremely confident that his charm, coupled with communication skills that existed only in his imagination, would allow him to talk to anybody, anywhere, linguistic barriers be damned. (It was quite a picture to see him "conversing" with Spanish speakers when they moved to Mexico, but that's a different topic.)

So, as the story is told, my dad went up to the clerk at the drugstore and asked for medicine to treat a yeast infection. Knowing my dad, his technique involved loud, repetitious use of English, occasionally remembering to speak slowly but not always. As that failed, he added visual aids to his attempt: namely, gesturing.

He pointed to his wife. Then he pointed to his crotch. And then started scratching his crotch. Then he looked expectantly at the clerk.

The Balinese are on the whole gentle souls with a good sense of humor, which probably explains why he was not arrested or beat up. He did not get the medication he sought, however. And I bet the person he gesticulated at is still marveling at the crazy foreigner who wanted ... something.
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Last edited by CairoCarol; 09-10-2019 at 08:37 PM.
  #92  
Old 09-10-2019, 09:55 PM
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Originally Posted by EdelweissPirate View Post
To be fair, pharmacists in other parts of the world can totally dispense some drugs without a physician or other third party’s involvement. I learned this while I was living in France. A few years later, I was visiting Paris with a girlfriend when she developed a UTI. I explained the issue to a female while my girlfriend stood there. She got a course of antibiotics on the spot.
That's also true here in the States, and what's available from behind-the-counter varies widely from state to state.

I'm talking about people who go in and just, like, help themselves to the Xanax and OxyContin.
  #93  
Old 09-11-2019, 03:34 AM
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nada *fluffy clouds pass by*
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Last edited by Nava; 09-11-2019 at 03:35 AM.
  #94  
Old 09-11-2019, 09:05 AM
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So, a military recruiter was on Pohnpei (the FSM's capital island) one day, speaking to a group of Micronesian young men and extolling the virtues of joining the military. One potential recruit had a question: "So, if we join the army, and the US gets into a war ... do we have to fight?"
About halfway through boot camp we were having a class on how to properly strap someone into a Stokes stretcher. Suddenly a guy interrupts, "Wait! You mean I could get hurt or killed?"

With a lot more patience than I would have had, the instructor replied, "Well, this is the Navy. The odds are pretty low but rather higher than in the civilian world."
  #95  
Old 09-11-2019, 10:08 AM
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A partner in our pathology practice was on call one weekend. He was paged to cover a problem, and called back saying he was at the airport about to leave on a trip. Sorry fellas, can't help you, gotta go, g'bye.
Well, to be fair, it was a pathology practice - they will still be dead when he gets back.

yes yes, I know there's more to pathology than autopsies. as in "go see if that's a duck".

Regards,
Shodan
  #96  
Old 09-14-2019, 11:38 PM
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I've whined here before about the difference between laws and regulations. For federal subcontracts work, lawyers are really not the best choice, but try to explain this to HR. They get soooooo excited when a JD applies.

I can hardly count the times I've had to sit down with some poor fool and straighten them out. Inevitably they thought they were going to sit around all day taking phone calls, researching laws and providing advice. It takes hours to give them the barest idea of the myriad of rules and regulations they will now be learning in order to get their incredibly admin-heavy jobs done. They seldom last long.
  #97  
Old 09-15-2019, 12:23 AM
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Originally Posted by Asuka View Post
Another story

I work in a warehouse than also has a "public" section with offices in the front. Two years ago an old man (probably in his 60's) applied to the job and got it in the warehouse portion. This was a section that worked 24 hours a day and had 3 shifts and you would come in to work and immediately relieve the shift before you.

Apparently the old guy thought the first week on the job he could show up on time, but instead of relieving the prior shift he could go make himself a cup of coffee and then go into the office section and drink it while sitting down and talking with various people for up to 30 to 40 minutes before finally making his way to his section. Then in addition to this, he wouldn't wait for his own relief and would leave work 30 minutes early leaving his area abandoned until the next shift showed up. Obviously the people he was suppose to relieve got very VERY pissed at this so they complained and by the end of the week he had a serious talking to by management. Then for the next two weeks he started to loudly gripe and complain to everyone who would listen how in his prior jobs "Guys have an understanding that everyone comes in late and to just cover for them with no complaining" not understanding he also wasn't following his advice and just leaving early instead of waiting for the next shift. About two months into his job he suddenly complains of an old injury and work gave him a menial job in the office portion just to shut him up. Now he spends his days hanging out in the mens restroom and talking to anybody who walks in about how his day has been going and commenting "Back so soon?" if you happen to see him in the restroom again which happens to be all the time because that guy is literally in the restroom at all hours of his shift.
This guy's wife must really drive him crazy. Why else would he do that?
  #98  
Old 09-15-2019, 01:41 AM
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Well, to be fair, it was a pathology practice - they will still be dead when he gets back.
I like Dennis Miller's joke: I think the easiest job in the world has to be pathologist. Even if everything goes wrong...maybe you get a pulse.
  #99  
Old 09-15-2019, 12:54 PM
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I worked with an awful lot of English as a Foreign Language teachers who had no idea at all about grammar. They literally had no idea how to explain what a verb is - and that is a bit complicated sometimes, but they didn't even have the rudiments.

This was in even fairly high-level EFL contexts where people were paying huge amounts to be taught.

The worst thing was that some of them disliked the idea of knowing about grammar. That wasn't because they'd been taught some other immersion-type school of teaching; they really thought that all English language teaching meant was correcting people and chatting a bit. They didn't understand that correcting people who are paying you generally requires a reason why you're correcting them, which means teaching them rather than just saying "that's wrong, we don't say it that way."

Even the chatting is not that easy - I saw many charming male teachers who thought they were doing really well, and their female students sometimes liked them, but the teachers just talked and people wrote things down. The students barely talked at all. This was in the UK. If they wanted to listen to a man talking about his life without any interaction they could just go on youtube.

(I never saw a female teacher do this).


Quote:
Originally Posted by Shodan View Post
My father had an employee who asked if they got the Monday after Easter off, because "Easter falls on a Sunday this year".

Regards,
Shodan
Was the employee not American? Some countries do have the Monday after Easter off if it falls on a Sunday.
  #100  
Old 09-15-2019, 01:08 PM
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Was the employee not American? Some countries do have the Monday after Easter off if it falls on a Sunday.
Are there any times when Easter Sunday doesn't fall on a Sunday? Admittedly, there are a number of holidays celebrated the week before Easter - Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and such - which are rarely celebrated by Americans (Holy Monday would be the Monday before Easter - is it possible they meant that one?). But even in the Orthodox tradition, Easter is celebrated on a Sunday.
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