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  #1  
Old 06-28-2017, 05:06 PM
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Again with the annoying commercials!


The previous thread has dropped off my first page, which is set to show any thread with a post within the last month. So here's a new thread on this perennial subject.

There's a commercial for something called Dentastix, I believe. It's for dogs. In this commercial a dad finishes feeding his baby in a high chair and she has a face full of food as infants tend to have after eating. He says, "Let's get you cleaned up before mom gets home" and walks out the kitchen to get wipes. When he comes back, the baby's face is clean and the dog is licking his chops and he says, "That'll work."

NO YOU NASTY MF'er.! CLEAN YOUR BABY"S FACE!!!!!!


And a hearty F you to Walmart for getting All I Do Is Win stuck in my head.
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Old 06-29-2017, 12:54 PM
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Yeah, that's nasty! I'm as big a fan of doggies as just about anybody, but DAMMIT! Keep them away from your face!
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Old 06-29-2017, 02:31 PM
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The continuing saga of morons cooing over Chevy products while the "guy" shows them meaningless stuff.
  #4  
Old 07-04-2017, 07:33 AM
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The continuing saga of morons cooing over Chevy products while the "guy" shows them meaningless stuff.
Yeah, but it won the JD Power award...


mmm
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Old 07-04-2017, 04:33 PM
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The continuing saga of morons cooing over Chevy products while the "guy" shows them meaningless stuff.
I thought the Chevy ads couldn't get any worse, but then I saw the one with the manbunned hipster dude mumbling "It's a superbad mamma jamma!". At that point I realized there were no depths too deep for these things to sink.
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Old 07-05-2017, 05:02 PM
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I thought the Chevy ads couldn't get any worse, but then I saw the one with the manbunned hipster dude mumbling "It's a superbad mamma jamma!". At that point I realized there were no depths too deep for these things to sink.
I was about to post that when I read your post. It may be the most cringeworthy line ... ever? ::shudder
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Old 07-06-2017, 06:44 PM
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I thought the Chevy ads couldn't get any worse, but then I saw the one with the manbunned hipster dude mumbling "It's a superbad mamma jamma!". At that point I realized there were no depths too deep for these things to sink.
That one is pretty bad. It's like they don't know what "mamma jamma" is a euphemism for.

Not to mention the ads where they try to convince you how sexy the Buicks are. "Oh, you're new Buick is sooo cute!" When they look exactly like everything else out there.
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Old 07-08-2017, 04:55 PM
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Not to mention the ads where they try to convince you how sexy the Buicks are. "Oh, you're new Buick is sooo cute!" When they look exactly like everything else out there.
OMG those are so stupid. Their product is basically the exact same boring retiree crap that it's always been, they've just drastically and aggressively attempted to change perception thru advertisement alone. "Oooh, nice Buick!" Said no one, ever. The most excited response you'll get from showing off your new Buick is, "Hey, that looks dependable!"
  #9  
Old 07-06-2017, 09:59 AM
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The continuing saga of morons cooing over Chevy products while the "guy" shows them meaningless stuff.
man, if there's ever a commercial to dissuade me from EVER buying a product, it's this. everything is so annoyingly phony and smug, i get the douchechills just thinking about it
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Old 07-06-2017, 12:35 PM
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man, if there's ever a commercial to dissuade me from EVER buying a product, it's this. everything is so annoyingly phony and smug, i get the douchechills just thinking about it
One of those 'regular people' gave an anonymous behind-the-scenes interview on those commercials. They are in fact people off the street, recruited for some ambiguous 'market research.' They genuinely don't know why they've been brought to that warehouse. Their reactions ring phony because...

Quote:
... you felt really bad about saying something negative about Chevy because there were 50 cameras on you, and it was just this one guy. He did this magic trick of making it seem like you were hurting his feelings if you said anything bad about Chevy. You didn’t want to see this guy stop smiling. It was really bizarre.
Story here: http://www.avclub.com/article/whats-...ommerc-255734?

Last edited by planetcory; 07-06-2017 at 12:36 PM.
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Old 07-06-2017, 12:45 PM
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One of those 'regular people' gave an anonymous behind-the-scenes interview on those commercials. They are in fact people off the street, recruited for some ambiguous 'market research.' They genuinely don't know why they've been brought to that warehouse. Their reactions ring phony because...



Story here: http://www.avclub.com/article/whats-...ommerc-255734?
They might be "real people", but they're actors just the same. They know the more they pretend to cream their jeans over these shitty vehicles, the more likely they'll be on the tube.
  #12  
Old 07-17-2017, 01:46 PM
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The continuing saga of morons cooing over Chevy products while the "guy" shows them meaningless stuff.
I hate "that guy" he defines the term "smarmy".
  #13  
Old 09-20-2019, 06:40 AM
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The continuing saga of morons cooing over Chevy products while the "guy" shows them meaningless stuff.
Like teen driver technology on a 4 banger car.

I have a teen drive tech idea; it's called seizing the car keys and cellphones.
Or you could report the car as stolen when they leave.

There are many ways to handle this.
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Old 06-29-2017, 06:45 PM
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Yeah, that's nasty! I'm as big a fan of doggies as just about anybody, but DAMMIT! Keep them away from your face!
My friend worked in Microbiology and thought it was a great way to boost her son's immune system.
  #15  
Old 06-29-2017, 03:02 PM
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This isn't about a particular commercial: we just started paying the slightly additional fee to HULU to not get commercials. The first thing we access--"New Girl"--has a disclaimer: Due to streaming restrictions, there will be a commercial at the start and conclusion of the show. WTF?
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Old 06-29-2017, 04:38 PM
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Sounds like the multitude of ad blockers I've downloaded that don't block ads!
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Old 06-29-2017, 05:30 PM
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All prescription drug commercials. Whether you are "Triseba read-aay!" or you're in the middle of having your "Movantik Moment", watching these commercials with their "snappy" little sayings can make you stabby.

Last edited by Ambivalid; 06-29-2017 at 05:32 PM.
  #18  
Old 06-29-2017, 05:38 PM
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All prescription drug commercials. Whether you are "Triseba read-aay!" or you're in the middle of having your "Movantik Moment", watching these commercials with their "snappy" little sayings can make you stabby.
I don't have cable and all day it's either new drugs, lawyers wanting to sue drug manufacturers (a hundred times a day something about Mesothelioma), and old people insurance companies exclaiming "you don't want to hurt your family by leaving them with your bills".
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Old 06-29-2017, 06:00 PM
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If you ever have Nickelodeon on, count how many times you see the commercial for the new super wubble ball, Jesus, just shoot me now. It annoys me so much. That, and the damn water balloons that are reusable. If anyone has purchased these please explain how they work and how do they not hurt like hell.
  #20  
Old 05-25-2019, 10:15 PM
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I don't have cable and all day it's either new drugs, lawyers wanting to sue drug manufacturers (a hundred times a day something about Mesothelioma), and old people insurance companies exclaiming "you don't want to hurt your family by leaving them with your bills".
Oh HELL with the yeah. When I was homebound for many weeks following hip surgery, I spent time watching "Decades", a free Digital channel.

I'm a 57 year-old man and by god, I know more about the use of catheters than I WANT to know.

Also, I have a fairly large t.v. set. The fine print at the bottom of the screen is simply beyond me.
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Old 07-05-2017, 05:09 PM
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All prescription drug commercials. Whether you are "Triseba read-aay!" or you're in the middle of having your "Movantik Moment", watching these commercials with their "snappy" little sayings can make you stabby.
You'll note that none of these drug ads mention that one side effect that they all have in common is that they make people and everyone around them, including pets, move in slow motion. Even pet meds have that same side effect. Coincidence?
  #22  
Old 07-05-2017, 10:00 PM
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All prescription drug commercials. Whether you are "Triseba read-aay!" or you're in the middle of having your "Movantik Moment", watching these commercials with their "snappy" little sayings can make you stabby.
These are illegal in every country on earth except the U.S. and New Zealand. Nobody hates them more than us pharmacists.

There's a You Tube commercial where someone talks about meeting her SO's parents, where they have set a feast on the table "and you need to bake a kiester casserole." I finally watched it to completion; it's for a product you spray on toilet water to disguise the smell of your poop.

  #23  
Old 07-06-2017, 07:17 AM
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"and you need to bake a kiester casserole."
This sounds like V.I.Poo...they run a commercial on TV featuring a lady who references "devil's donuts," complete with a little animation of brown donut-shaped objects dropping into a toilet bowl.
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Old 07-04-2017, 03:36 AM
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Based on the look on the child's face, I like to imagine that they actually did allow the dog to clean the child.
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Old 07-04-2017, 03:24 PM
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Can Bluebell not afford video for their commercials?
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Old 07-05-2017, 05:59 PM
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"You may ask yourself: How did I get [mesothelioma]"? I guess these ambulance chasers were unaware this is a phrase in a Talking Heads song.

The endless, vapid Liberty Insurance ads. Hey, stoopid, unless you bought zillion dollar gap insurance for your new POS ain't nobody gonna replace your Ford FuzzyWuzzy with a new one if you total your car.

I also loathe the Chevy commercials: "it looks like a BMW!" No, no it doesn't. There are some hilarious YouTube spoofs of this ad series.
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Old 07-05-2017, 06:05 PM
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Actually even the best commercials become annoying when you have to see them at every commercial break during an entire baseball game. (Never mind how long the baseball games are getting. Why does the pitcher spend half his time making love to the ball. Just throw it, asshole.) Ahem. Anyhow, don't show the commercial 97,488 times an hour, please. Southwest has a great airline and some cute commercials, the firs 97,486 times they're shown. Then they get old.
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Old 07-05-2017, 07:38 PM
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WHAT is with the two bathtubs in Cialis commercials? Two bathtubs on a beach, in the middle of what appears to be an outdoor mall, and just the very ends of them peeking in from the side of the screen on the last commercial I saw. What do two bathtubs have to do with sex??!!
  #29  
Old 07-05-2017, 08:15 PM
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WHAT is with the two bathtubs in Cialis commercials? Two bathtubs on a beach, in the middle of what appears to be an outdoor mall, and just the very ends of them peeking in from the side of the screen on the last commercial I saw. What do two bathtubs have to do with sex??!!
And how the fuck is he supposed to bone her from a separate tub???
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Old 07-05-2017, 10:02 PM
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WHAT is with the two bathtubs in Cialis commercials? Two bathtubs on a beach, in the middle of what appears to be an outdoor mall, and just the very ends of them peeking in from the side of the screen on the last commercial I saw. What do two bathtubs have to do with sex??!!
I remember the Levitra commercial where a guy threw a football through a tire swing. Around that time, there was some discussion in the Jewish community regarding the use of ED meds during Passover, and Jay Leno, who was still on late-night TV, had a parody where a rabbi threw a matzo ball through a tire swing.
  #31  
Old 07-10-2017, 10:47 AM
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WHAT is with the two bathtubs in Cialis commercials? Two bathtubs on a beach, in the middle of what appears to be an outdoor mall, and just the very ends of them peeking in from the side of the screen on the last commercial I saw. What do two bathtubs have to do with sex??!!
My husband works for a division of the pharmaceutical company (Eli Lily), and says he recently was told the significance of the two bathtubs, but then we got interrupted and I forgot to ask!
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Old 07-10-2017, 11:40 AM
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My husband works for a division of the pharmaceutical company (Eli Lily), and says he recently was told the significance of the two bathtubs, but then we got interrupted and I forgot to ask!

Ask Heathcliff
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Old 07-05-2017, 10:05 PM
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To be honest, I may have let my 80 pound dog lick my kid's face clean before. Oh well. Then again, he gets into practical make out sessions with me or my wife.
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Old 07-06-2017, 12:09 AM
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To be honest, I may have let my 80 pound dog lick my kid's face clean before. Oh well. Then again, he gets into practical make out sessions with me or my wife.
Yeahbut you clean the face after, right? RIGHT???
  #35  
Old 07-06-2017, 12:37 AM
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There's a series of commercials for a tire store (online, I think) about the dumb things we do on wheels; driving into a parking garage with a bike on the roof rack, trying to pull a stump out of the ground and ripping the bed off a pickup, or spilling coffee. But at least you can be smart about where you buy tires.

I hate commercials that are all about people being stupid (it'd be easier to list the ones that aren't), and these are the worst of the lot at the moment.
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Old 07-06-2017, 04:51 PM
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Yeahbut you clean the face after, right? RIGHT???
Usually. Usually.
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Old 07-06-2017, 05:31 PM
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Those Addiction Network ads that seem to run about every inning when I'm watching baseball. Seriously.
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Old 07-06-2017, 05:51 PM
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Those Addiction Network ads that seem to run about every inning when I'm watching baseball. Seriously.
Are those the ones with the guy with messed up priorities? "You can die, or even worse, hurt someone!"
  #39  
Old 07-06-2017, 01:27 PM
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I'm sure it was mentioned in the old thread (which I never really followed) but the PuppyMonkeyBaby is back, and I really wish that it was dead.
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Old 07-06-2017, 02:48 PM
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This fucking "boogie woogie" ad makes me stabby. It's the guys face.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKeR1y0Ytu8
  #41  
Old 07-06-2017, 03:26 PM
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I'm sure it was mentioned in the old thread (which I never really followed) but the PuppyMonkeyBaby is back, and I really wish that it was dead.
Kickstart, brought to you by Satan's Abominations!
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Old 07-06-2017, 05:28 PM
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I'm sure it was mentioned in the old thread (which I never really followed) but the PuppyMonkeyBaby is back, and I really wish that it was dead.
I had heard about it but missed seeing that the first time around. Not so lucky this time.
  #43  
Old 09-25-2017, 08:22 AM
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I'm sure it was mentioned in the old thread (which I never really followed) but the PuppyMonkeyBaby is back, and I really wish that it was dead.
I managed to not see that abomination after it was aired on the Superbowl, but suddenly it's in heavy ad rotation on Comedy Central.

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There's a You Tube commercial where someone talks about meeting her SO's parents, where they have set a feast on the table "and you need to bake a kiester casserole." I finally watched it to completion; it's for a product you spray on toilet water to disguise the smell of your poop.
"Well, she's a nice girl, but I don't understand why she left the bathroom smelling like shitrus."

(That ad isn't just on YouTube, sadly.)

(And it's overpriced essential oils.)
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Old 07-06-2017, 04:24 PM
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Is it a Chevy commercial where the guy falls to his knees in front of a truck and begs for one? Because that just makes me feel like people will do anything to be on TV. And also brings to mind that there is probably a rule 34 internet site for men/truck porn.
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Old 07-06-2017, 08:01 PM
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Ain't no way that lady is fitting a cello, a tuba, and two kids who likely require car seats into that little Buick.
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Old 07-07-2017, 09:28 AM
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Ain't no way that lady is fitting a cello, a tuba, and two kids who likely require car seats into that little Buick.
What's a sousaphone?
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Old 07-07-2017, 09:32 AM
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What's a sousaphone?
From Wiki.
Quote:
The sousaphone is a type of tuba designed to be easier to play than the concert tuba while standing or marching. It is widely employed in marching bands and various other musical genres. Designed to fit around the body of the musician and supported by the left shoulder, the sousaphone may be readily played while being carried. It is useful in all types of bands that play outdoors, as it directs the sound forward, unlike a traditional upright tuba. The instrument is named after American bandmaster and composer John Philip Sousa, who popularized its use in his band.
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Old 07-07-2017, 09:52 AM
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From Wiki.
I assumed that was some sort of meme, because nobody even mentioned a sousaphone on this thread. This supports that hypothesis. No clue as to the origin, though.
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Old 07-07-2017, 04:27 PM
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I assumed that was some sort of meme, because nobody even mentioned a sousaphone on this thread. This supports that hypothesis. No clue as to the origin, though.
It's from the commerical cited above, where the band claims they can even fit their sousaphone in the Chevy (ETA: Chevy, Buick, whatevs). Douchy McDoucherson the "host" asks what a sousaphone is.

Jeep's Phoenix: <<Ain't no way that lady is fitting a cello, a tuba, and two kids who likely require car seats into that little Buick. >>

Last edited by gigi; 07-07-2017 at 04:28 PM.
  #50  
Old 10-02-2017, 01:57 PM
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Ain't no way that lady is fitting a cello, a tuba, and two kids who likely require car seats into that little Buick.
Eh, my mom used to fit a golden retriever, 2 small kids and 2 baskets of laundry into a Simca and add the weeks groceries to the trip back home.
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