Straight Dope Message Board

[Hung Mung]

Originally Posted by Bob Ducca

O.R. they?

I think we're just going to have to be secretly in love and leave it at that. 51

[Fear Itself]

Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials and I won't say anything. 52

[bobot]

I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm just gonna bash your brains in. Gonna bash them right the fuck in. 53

[ExTank]

Originally Posted by bobot

I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm just gonna bash your brains in. Gonna bash them right the fuck in.

Inconceivable! 54

[Sampiro]

"I don't know. I can imagine quite a lot." 55

[Dunkelheit]

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. 56

[Little Nemo]

Originally Posted by ExTank

Inconceivable!

"You wanna know who I want to get pregnant? Felicity Huffman. Ever since I saw Transamerica, I can't get her out of my head." 57

[ExTank]

Originally Posted by Little Nemo

"You wanna know who I want to get pregnant? Felicity Huffman. Ever since I saw Transamerica, I can't get her out of my head."

Look, just stay away from my fucking lady friend. 58

[oreally]

Do we have to use quotes that include the F word? 59

[The Other Jeffrey Lebowski]

Everything's a fuckin' travesty with you, man! And what was all that shit about Vietnam? What the FUCK, has anything got to do with Vietnam? What the fuck are you talking about? 60

[Sefton]

"What we've got here... is a failure to communicate." 61

[6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast]

Don't be fatuous, Jeffrey. 62

[florez]

I don't want to put you in a cage. I want to love you. 63

[Little Nemo]

"Two go in, one comes out" 64

[El_Kabong]

A game-legged old man and a drunk. That's all you got? 65

[The Other Jeffrey Lebowski]

I've got all five senses and I slept last night, that puts me six up on the lot of you 66

[ExTank]

Originally Posted by The Other Jeffrey Lebowski

I've got all five senses and I slept last night, that puts me six up on the lot of you

I guess that's the way the whole durned human comedy keeps perpetuatin' itself. 67

[Boyo Jim]

Originally Posted by ExTank

I guess that's the way the whole durned human comedy keeps perpetuatin' itself.

You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny! 68

[astorian]

Originally Posted by Boyo Jim

You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!

You're a funny guy, Sully. I LIKE you. That's why I'm going to kill you last. 69

[Boyo Jim]

Originally Posted by astorian

You're a funny guy, Sully. I LIKE you. That's why I'm going to kill you last.

The only question is, how do you want to die? We need to hear the truth. If you persist in lying to us, we'll torture you. You'll die only after many hours of agony and horror. You give us honesty now, and you'll go swiftly, painlessly. 70

[Spoons]

Originally Posted by Boyo Jim

The only question is, how do you want to die? We need to hear the truth. If you persist in lying to us, we'll torture you. You'll die only after many hours of agony and horror. You give us honesty now, and you'll go swiftly, painlessly.

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I've watched c-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. 71

[bobot]

They think...they think You've been faking it. 72

[Tangent]

Originally Posted by bobot

They think...they think You've been faking it.

The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was to convince the world he didn't exist. 73

[Typo Negative]

"When I was a child, my mother would tell me a story about how the Devil roams the Earth. Sometimes, she said, he would take human form so he could punish the damned on Earth before claiming their souls. The ones he chose would be gathered together and tortured as he hid amongst them, pretending to be one of them" 74

[The Other Jeffrey Lebowski]

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of eldeberries! 75

[Kamino Neko]

Your mother was a snowblower! 76

[NDP]

You're mom goes to college. 77

[6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast]

Fat drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son. 78

[FoieGrasIsEvil]

Originally Posted by Fear Itself

Let me have my toaster and my TV and my steel-belted radials and I won't say anything.

"And that's the only thing I need is *this*. I don't need this or this. Just this ashtray... And this paddle game. - The ashtray and the paddle game and that's all I need... And this remote control. - The ashtray, the paddle game, and the remote control, and that's all I need... And these matches. - The ashtray, and these matches, and the remote control, and the paddle ball... And this lamp. - The ashtray, this paddle game, and the remote control, and the lamp, and that's all *I* need. And that's *all* I need too. I don't need one other thing, not one... I need this. - The paddle game and the chair, and the remote control, and the matches for sure. Well what are you looking at? What do you think I'm some kind of a jerk or something! - And this. That's all I need." 79

[Hung Mung]

Originally Posted by 6ImpossibleThingsB4Breakfast

Fat drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

Because they know all they sold ya was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is, isn't it? Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time. But for now, for your customer's sake, for your daughter's sake, ya might wanna think about buying a quality product from me.

(I'm not happy about having to decide to skip Foie's quote from The Jerk, but it's from the top of the page, so...) 80

[astorian]

Originally Posted by Hung Mung

Because they know all they sold ya was a guaranteed piece of shit. That's all it is, isn't it? Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time. But for now, for your customer's sake, for your daughter's sake, ya might wanna think about buying a quality product from me.

And you know what you'll be saying? A bunch of losers sitting around in a bar. "Oh yeah. I used to be a salesman. It's a tough racket." 81

[Boyo Jim]

I once tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an insurance salesman. 82

[SykoSkotty]

Originally Posted by oreally

Do we have to use quotes that include the F word?

Fuckin' A....... 83

[Chefguy]

Badges? We don't got no badges. . .we don't need no steenking badges! 84

[Fear Itself]

Jesus, Joseph and Mary. These Hmong broads are like badgers. 85

[GrandWino]

Originally Posted by Kamino Neko

Your mother was a snowblower!

This chick is toast! 86

[Chefguy]

I believe you have my stapler. . .? 87

[florez]

I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do; 88

[Boyo Jim]

Originally Posted by Fear Itself

Jesus, Joseph and Mary. These Hmong broads are like badgers.

Honey badger don't give a shit. He's a badass motherfucker. 89

[Astroboy14]

Dude, where's my car? 90

[El_Kabong]

Two days ago, I saw a vehicle that would haul that tanker. You want to get out of here? You talk to me. 91

[Boyo Jim]

Are you talkin' to me? 92

[El_Kabong]

You take a page outta this guy's book: a little less you talk, a little more you think! 93

[SykoSkotty]

Oooooh........ahhhh......I'm going to have to go ahead and "disagree" with you there......yyyeahhhh...... 94

[Boyo Jim]

You're not very smart. I like that in a man. 95

[Dunkelheit]

Wait a second. I just got a really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. 96

[Fear Itself]

You get those holes a-leakin', I'm gonna whomp you with a knotted plow line. 97

[Ellen Cherry]

Moving the fun from Cafe Society to the Game Room. 98

[Typo Negative]

'When I tell you to move, you'll move fast" 99

[Jack Batty]

Fuck the stakes Bodhi! The only one that thinks that this is a game is you, man. This is real. This is serious shit, and I am scared. 100