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  #1  
Old 02-19-2019, 09:30 PM
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There once was an amphibian named Jeremiah...


Who was my confidant of highest esteem.

I was unable to grasp the nuances of his speech, but verily I did assist him in the consumption of alcoholic beverages.

(Stolen from a FB post.)
  #2  
Old 02-19-2019, 10:13 PM
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If I was the boss, you know what I like to see? No, cars, no bars, and wars. Then we can have a little roll in the hay. Sweet!
  #3  
Old 02-20-2019, 08:45 PM
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You are all aware of my many peccadillos with the gentler sex, and how my prodigious appetite for Par-Tay is seldom abated. Am an acrobiotic aviator, a prismatic buckaroo (as it were), and can act as a sniper as if born to it with a wide variety of firearms. Yes, verily, a wide variety of firearms.
  #4  
Old 02-21-2019, 01:02 AM
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Scintillate, Scintillate diminutive stellar orb. How inexplicable to me seems this stupendous problem of your existence. Elevated at such at an immeasurable distance, in an apparently perpendicular direction from this terrestrial planet which we occupy. Resembling in thy dazzling and unapproachable efulgence, a gem of purist carbon, set solitaire in a university of space.
  #5  
Old 02-21-2019, 01:41 AM
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I have a desire to have your digits in mine.
  #6  
Old 02-21-2019, 10:29 AM
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Walk stealthily and self defenestrate
Near the aperture, my expected location
Do walk stealthily among the perennial herbaceous bulbiferous geophytes, accompanying yours truly

Last edited by Bayaker; 02-21-2019 at 10:30 AM.
  #7  
Old 02-21-2019, 10:37 AM
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The day before today
All of the difficulties I'm currently experiencing seemed quite distant
Now it seems as though they will not abate
I'm firm in my conviction that the day before today was better.
  #8  
Old 02-21-2019, 11:35 AM
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A trio of sightless vermin. A trio of sightless vermin.
Watch them skedaddle. Watch them skedaddle.
Each one dashed toward the clodhopper’s spouse,
Which severed their tag-ends using a kitchen blade,
Have y’all, on any occasion, watched a spectacle like that,
Like a trio of sightless vermin?
  #9  
Old 02-21-2019, 12:16 PM
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In an undetermined location beyond the meteorological phenomenon that appears as a multicolored arc that forms with the sunlight reflecting off water,
at a great vertical altitude,
exists an area of which I received mention
on a particular occasion in a song designed to induce sleep in infants and toddlers.
  #10  
Old 02-21-2019, 12:57 PM
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This diminutive shoat proceeded toward an area designated for the procurement of foodstuffs;
This diminutive shoat elected to remain in his domicile;
This diminutive shoat consumed the cooked muscle tissue of a bovine creature;
This diminutive shoat failed to partake of the aforementioned consumable;
This diminutive shoat uttered short, terror-induced cries in the upper audio frequencies until arriving at the place of its residence.
  #11  
Old 02-21-2019, 01:45 PM
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Warble lyrics about a tanner,
A pouch brimming with grain,
Two dozen Turdus merula
Cooked in a pastry


John Brisling was not able to consume greasy comestibles,
John’s spouse took no scrawny flesh,
Lo, among the twain , as a matter of fact,
The couple tongued the salver spotless.

Last edited by Bayaker; 02-21-2019 at 01:46 PM. Reason: spelling
  #12  
Old 02-21-2019, 02:38 PM
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In a wooden cabin in a forest
In the vicinity of New Orleans
A young man named John B. Goode lived
He was functionally illiterate
But he could play a guitar in such a manner
That it sounded like a bell

Proceed, John, Proceed
Proceed, John, Proceed
Proceed, John, Proceed
Proceed, John, Proceed
Proceed, John B. Goode
  #13  
Old 02-21-2019, 03:28 PM
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Farewell, Ms.New World pastry...
Propel your Detroit gas-guzzler to the dam,
The dam was arid,
Those local yokels were imbibing various and sundry liquors
Vocalizing this will be the day of our demise...
  #14  
Old 02-22-2019, 11:10 AM
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Would that I owned a ball peen,
I would forge at dawn,
I would forge at dusk,
Throughout the countryside.
I would forge away peril,
I would forge an admonishing alarm,
I would forge a compassionate responsive kinship among all people,
Throughout the countryside.
  #15  
Old 02-22-2019, 11:37 AM
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Rocky Raccoon checked into his accommodation
Gideon's Bible was the only literary
Rocky had arrived with a loaded firearm
To amputate the legs of his adversary
His opponent had sundered his romantic aspirations
By abducting his inamorata
Her moniker was MaGill, but she chose the epithet Lil
But she was commonly referred to as Mamacita
  #16  
Old 02-22-2019, 03:12 PM
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Is this factual existence?
Is this merely a product of imagination?
Trapped in a flood of falling stones, without a means of exit.
Uncover your organs of perception, point them at the stratosphere and observe
I am merely a youth of inadequate means
I do not require favorable thoughts
Since I arrive and depart without difficulty, in a slight upwards and downwards direction
In whatever direction the air moves, I do not find this of significance. I do not.

(I know I should be able to get #2 and #3. But I can't. Just me??)
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  #17  
Old 02-22-2019, 03:18 PM
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There exists a structure in New Orleans,
with the title of The Rising Sun,
This structure has resulted in the downfall of many unfortunate young men,
and I'm very disheartened to tell you that I am a part of this group.

My mother was employed through the domestic art of crafting and repairing clothing,
In fact, these magnificent trousers that I'm wearing are a result of her skill and generosity,
My father, on the other hand, was addicted to the gaming tables,
In that same city of New Orleans.
Now, in fact, the only belongings that such a gamer would need,
Is a functional set of luggage,
And the only time that such a man would feel satisfaction,
Is when he's sufficiently inebriated.
  #18  
Old 02-22-2019, 03:53 PM
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Mothers, let not your children attain adulthood as wranglers
Let them not pluck six-stringed acoustical instruments or pilot those aged lorries
Allow them to be physicians and solicitors, et cetera
Mothers, let not your children attain adulthood as wranglers
Since they won't ever remain in the household and will forever remain solitary
Including alongside their inamorata
  #19  
Old 02-22-2019, 04:28 PM
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My maternal parental unit advised me not to attend. Again, my maternal parental unit advised me not to attend. She informed me: "That's not a proper way to enjoy oneself, my child. That's not a proper way to enjoy oneself."
  #20  
Old 02-22-2019, 04:31 PM
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I have never traveled to the Iberian Peninsula, but I enjoy the instrumental efforts of it's residents. It is said that the women there are mentally unstable, but they are well trained in exercising their disorders.
  #21  
Old 02-22-2019, 05:32 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aspidistra View Post
Is this factual existence?
Is this merely a product of imagination?
Trapped in a flood of falling stones, without a means of exit.
Uncover your organs of perception, point them at the stratosphere and observe
I am merely a youth of inadequate means
I do not require favorable thoughts
Since I arrive and depart without difficulty, in a slight upwards and downwards direction
In whatever direction the air moves, I do not find this of significance. I do not.

(I know I should be able to get #2 and #3. But I can't. Just me??)
(#2 was the second verse to Jerimiah was a bullfrog.
"If I was the king of the world.....and so on")
  #22  
Old 02-22-2019, 07:11 PM
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The tires of the motor coach spin unceasingly,
Spin unceasingly, spin unceasingly.
The tires of the motor coach spin unceasingly,
Throughout the whole of the city.
  #23  
Old 02-22-2019, 07:46 PM
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Paddle, paddle, paddle your dinghy,
Peacefully down the brook,
Gleefully, gleefully,gleefully,gleefully,
Existence is but a sleep story.
  #24  
Old 02-23-2019, 01:06 AM
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Embrace me more, danseuse of diminutive size,
Tabulate the illuminating apparatuses on the thoroughfare,
Repose with me in bedding of cambric,
You've experienced an active day on this diurnal journey.
  #25  
Old 02-26-2019, 05:45 PM
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I have traversed the empty barren sandy land on an innominate Equus ferus caballus,
It was a positive sensation to avoid water falling in drops condensed from vapor in the atmosphere.


(BTW Aspidistra, it's not just you; I don't get #3 either--"prismatic buckaroo" sounds like Rhinestone cowboy but the rest of the words don't fit?)
  #26  
Old 02-26-2019, 05:50 PM
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You may not determine the meaning of my
You may not determine the meaning of my
Nay, you may not determine the meaning of my
Stoic visage
  #27  
Old 02-28-2019, 02:24 AM
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And so all persons have been informed about aves
a-a-a-aves, aves is current.
And so aves, aves, aves, aves is current.
And so aves, aves, aves, aves is current.
aves, aves, aves, aves is current.
Have you not been informed regarding aves?
And so all persons know that aves is current.
Aves, aves, aves is current.
  #28  
Old 02-28-2019, 02:50 AM
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Shall we be intimate on the avenue?
Shall we be intimate on the avenue?
Shall we be intimate on the avenue?
Shall we be intimate on the avenue?

None will be about to glimpse our doings,
Shall we be intimate on the avenue?
  #29  
Old 02-28-2019, 07:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gkster View Post
(BTW Aspidistra, it's not just you; I don't get #3 either--"prismatic buckaroo" sounds like Rhinestone cowboy but the rest of the words don't fit?)
Posts #1, 2, and 3 of this thread are the correspondingly numbered verses in Joy To The World.

Prismatic buckaroo = rainbow rider
  #30  
Old 02-28-2019, 08:49 AM
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I abandoned my hollow muscular organ that pumps blood through the circulatory system by rhythmic contraction and dilation
in San Francisco...
  #31  
Old 02-28-2019, 09:28 AM
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... At the apex of a knoll, the town summons me...
  #32  
Old 02-28-2019, 10:40 AM
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...to a location in which the diminutive mass transit rail system cabin hauled by electrically operated hawsers ascends partially towards the constellations...

Last edited by gkster; 02-28-2019 at 10:41 AM.
  #33  
Old 02-28-2019, 11:16 AM
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....the time period following sunrise finds a thick cloud of tiny water droplets suspended in the atmosphere at or near the earth's surface which restricts visibility and sometimes results in frigid air temperatures, but I am nonetheless heedless....
  #34  
Old 02-28-2019, 02:49 PM
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In a repetitiously circadian cycle atop a promontory in a solitary manner, a dude with a silly smile mimics paralysis.

Last edited by Prof. Pepperwinkle; 02-28-2019 at 02:50 PM.
  #35  
Old 02-28-2019, 02:57 PM
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I admire voluminous gluteal protrusions and I am incapable of bearing false witness

Last edited by Cardigan; 02-28-2019 at 03:01 PM.
  #36  
Old 02-28-2019, 04:13 PM
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Which individual is responsible for granting the canines a point of egress?
  #37  
Old 02-28-2019, 05:54 PM
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All of us abide in a golden colored boat that goes underwater...
  #38  
Old 03-01-2019, 01:49 AM
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Ooh, my miniscule attractive one, attractive one;
Might I enquire when I might expect some hours out of the day from you, Sharona?
  #39  
Old 03-01-2019, 02:12 AM
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Similar to an ingénue
Caressed in a completely novel manner
Similar to an ingénue
While your inner pulsations are closest
  #40  
Old 03-02-2019, 01:16 AM
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Is this the bona fide existence?
Is this just some sort of dream?
Call it a bunch of geology falling from a promontory,
No escape from what actually is.
  #41  
Old 03-02-2019, 02:34 AM
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I liked my one better Also - look out! Falling Mondegreens!

Ahem

Without artificial illumination, the peril is reduced.
We have arrived - reduce our boredom
I feel foolish, and catching
We have arrived - reduce our boredom
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  #42  
Old 03-02-2019, 06:45 PM
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When our terrestrial satellite is in the mansion of the fifth prime
And Zeus coincides with Ares
Then irenic serenity will shepherd the wandering orbs
And amour proper shall drive the stellar lights
  #43  
Old 03-02-2019, 06:55 PM
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Envision there's no celestial city
It's not hard if you endeavor
No hades under us
Atop us only atmosphere ...
  #44  
Old 03-02-2019, 08:25 PM
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Near the beginning of the period between sunrise and noon when I was following a given circuit
I injected a dose of benzoylmethylecgonine and discharged a lead projectile into my female companion.
I returned to my abode and sought temporary unconsciousness.
I placed my favorite firearm with a barrel diameter of 0.44 inches below my cranium.
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Can also be seen at:

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  #45  
Old 03-02-2019, 10:33 PM
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Satan save the monarch
The totalitarian dominion
They made you you a duncehead
A veritable ICBM

Satan save the monarch
She's not homo sapien
And there's no fullness of time
And England's hallucinating

Don't be instructed what you wish for
Don't be instructed what you require
There's no fullness of time
No fullness of time
Mo fullness of time for you

Satan save the monarch
We're sincere, dude
We like our monarch
And satan saves

Satan save the monarch
'Cause tourists enable a revenue stream
And our titular head
Is not what it seems

...
  #46  
Old 03-09-2019, 12:07 AM
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I am primate and a flea bit me
and my comrades are drug addicts
or not.
I am a chilled Italian pie
I would like my male member squeezed.
I invite you to do it.
I’m glad to be a male drug addict.
I’m glad you are a female addict.
  #47  
Old 10-31-2019, 11:04 AM
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I see you commuting about the village with the lady I have affection for, and I'm thinking, fornicate this guy. I'm trying to sort out if it's perhaps the lack of coinage in the compartments sewn into my pants, and I'm still thinking, seriously, perform a sexual act on this guy, and not in a pleasant way. And I should add, that same sentiment goes for the lady I had mentioned previously.
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  #48  
Old 10-31-2019, 04:35 PM
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Stay upright beside your male significant other.
  #49  
Old 10-31-2019, 06:03 PM
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This territory is for me,
This territory is for you,
From the 31st state to the 11th's enisled acreage,
From woods of S. giganteum to the east shoreline of the 27th state,
This territory came into existence for us.
  #50  
Old 10-31-2019, 09:35 PM
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A woman is confident
All shiny objects are aureate
And she's purchasing an escalier to paradise
When she arrives she checks
If any merchant booths are open
And then she'll obtain any item by saying a single word
Oh oh oh oh and she's purchasing an escalier to paradise
There's a document with information
But she wishes to verify the intent
Due to words having multiple connotations
In the topiary by the estuary
There's an oscine who carries a tune with its voice
The inaccuracies of our thinking processes
Ooh, I hereby speculate
Ooh, I hereby speculate
I come to a realization
When I look 90 degrees perpendicular to the north
and my essence regrets disembarking
Upon examination of my information processing ability
Vapor ovals in the topiary
And spectators commenting about something
Ooh, I hereby ponder
Ooh, I really hereby ponder
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