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Old 06-19-2018, 06:47 AM
waddlingeagle waddlingeagle is offline
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The Mark of the Beast

Link to original column: https://www.straightdope.com/columns...-of-the-beast/

One of the better explanations I have read is that apocalyptic revelations are deliberately vague so as to represent repeating patterns of history on different levels. The revelation does not refer to a single event, but rather is a type and shadow comparing current events with larger cycles, including the history of the world as a whole. Thus, Revelation is about Nero, but it is also about the Roman Empire in general, and also is about the creation, life, and ultimate destruction of the world.

It is, in essence, a poetic form beloved of Semitic peoples, related to pre-Islamic Arabic forms. It is not intended to fit any event or sequence of events exactly, but rather the narrative is created to fit the poetic form.
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Old 06-19-2018, 07:37 AM
TriPolar TriPolar is online now
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'Eschatology'. Cool word.
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Old 06-19-2018, 08:26 AM
Don Draper Don Draper is offline
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I'm not going to dispute the research of this article, but I don't understand why ancient theologians insisted that God created the world in seven days. He created it in six days, and on the seventh day he rested. Ergo, God took a day off. So why did they say it took seven days to create the world?
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Old 06-19-2018, 08:29 AM
Sicks Ate Sicks Ate is offline
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Why would God need to rest?
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Old 06-19-2018, 09:08 AM
Chronos Chronos is offline
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The idea is that resting is, itself, part of Creation. The seventh day is when He created rest.
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Old 06-19-2018, 09:13 AM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is offline
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The idea is that resting is, itself, part of Creation. The seventh day is when He created rest.
I'm pretty sure we humans would have invented slacking off all on our own...say, within about the first fifteen minutes of our existence.
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Old 06-19-2018, 10:32 AM
Jasmine Jasmine is offline
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I heard from a reliable source that the true "mark of the beast" is a constantly "flushed orange" complexion that is due, they say, from being constantly exposed to the severe heat of hell. I don't have a specific cite for that, but that's what "they say".

It's probably a ridiculous assertion because who could possibly have a constantly orange complexion?!
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Old 06-19-2018, 12:09 PM
naita naita is offline
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Why think that is their purpose when the real world interpretation is always "It applies to _this_ event!"

Ancient revelations and prophecies still around today aren't deliberately vague so they can last through the ages, they have lasted through the ages because they were vague.
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Old 06-19-2018, 12:57 PM
furryman furryman is offline
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I heard from a reliable source that the true "mark of the beast" is a constantly "flushed orange" complexion that is due, they say, from being constantly exposed to the severe heat of hell. I don't have a specific cite for that, but that's what "they say".

It's probably a ridiculous assertion because who could possibly have a constantly orange complexion?!
Too much carotene?

I read that the best way to find out if someone's a demon in disguise is to check their feet. For some reason demons can't hide their hooves.

Last edited by furryman; 06-19-2018 at 12:58 PM.
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Old 06-19-2018, 01:24 PM
Kobal2 Kobal2 is online now
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Why would God need to rest?

The porn isn't going to watch itself, Samael !
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I'm not sure how to respond to this, but that's never stopped me before.
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Old 06-20-2018, 07:24 AM
4d3fect 4d3fect is offline
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John was so whacked on the local fungi when he had this vision that the numbers probably looked like squiggles to him: no frame of reference. I figure bar codes.
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Old 06-20-2018, 07:40 AM
Jasmine Jasmine is offline
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I read that the best way to find out if someone's a demon in disguise is to check their feet. For some reason demons can't hide their hooves.
I'd be careful about trifling with a demon's feet. You could get a real quick, severe case of "Hoof in the Mouth Disease">
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Old 06-20-2018, 09:46 AM
kaylasdad99 kaylasdad99 is offline
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Why think that is their purpose when the real world interpretation is always "It applies to _this_ event!"

Ancient revelations and prophecies still around today aren't deliberately vague so they can last through the ages, they have lasted through the ages because they were vague.
The way I read the hypothesis in the OP is that they were deliberately made vague because the crafters somehow knew that they were going to NEED to last through the ages.

And they were RIGHT! Man, these dudes must have been some kind of PROPHETS!

Wait...
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Old 06-20-2018, 09:48 AM
kaylasdad99 kaylasdad99 is offline
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Too much carotene?

I read that the best way to find out if someone's a demon in disguise is to check their feet. For some reason demons can't hide their hooves.
What, they haven't heard of SHOES?
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Old 06-20-2018, 09:49 AM
naita naita is offline
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The way I read the hypothesis in the OP is that they were deliberately made vague because the crafters somehow knew that they were going to NEED to last through the ages.
Yes. And I'm saying "That's nonsense", but I was trying to do so with a touch of subtlety.
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Old 06-20-2018, 10:02 AM
kaylasdad99 kaylasdad99 is offline
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Tell me more of this "subtlety" magik of which you speak...

First, let me put away this bottle of seltzer, and this here rubber chicken.


I'm keeping the joy buzzer.

Last edited by kaylasdad99; 06-20-2018 at 10:02 AM.
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Old 06-20-2018, 12:01 PM
tomndebb tomndebb is offline
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The idea is that resting is, itself, part of Creation. The seventh day is when He created rest.
Jokes aside, (even if a funny one appears in this thread), that is exactly the case. Many societies/cultures have never actually incorporated a day of rest into their calendars, yet Judaism has made it part of the cornerstone of its theology, (passing it on the Christianity), and thus codifying it in law and culture. Judaism is not completely alone in this, Buddhism has Uposatha that may be celebrated from two to six times each month, depending on the local tradition. Similarly, while Roman, Greek, and Egyptian calendars did not specify a "day of rest," they were often filled with holidays of one sort or another. What Judaism and Buddhism did differently was to specify that there would be a periodic and regular day of rest for its own sake rather than knocking off work to celebrate a specific god or emperor or whatever.
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Old 06-20-2018, 01:17 PM
szabrocki szabrocki is offline
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If there is a Gods day of rest?

Why do people pray to them on that day?

I would think that it is a day off and whatever God shouldn't be bothered.

How many people want a call for help or praise on their day off regardless of religion?
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Old 06-21-2018, 09:19 AM
dropzone dropzone is offline
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Really? Its his, her, it's JOB to be bothered.
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Old 06-21-2018, 06:38 PM
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Similarly, while Roman, Greek, and Egyptian calendars did not specify a "day of rest," they were often filled with holidays of one sort or another. What Judaism and Buddhism did differently was to specify that there would be a periodic and regular day of rest for its own sake rather than knocking off work to celebrate a specific god or emperor or whatever.
We all know that Sundays and Christmas are not business days. As someone (Gibbon?) pointed out to me, n ancient Rome you had to pay a priest to determine which days are "auspicious" for dong business. By "late" Rome it was codified.
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Old 06-22-2018, 12:17 AM
smithsb smithsb is offline
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We all know that Sundays and Christmas are not business days. As someone (Gibbon?) pointed out to me, n ancient Rome you had to pay a priest to determine which days are "auspicious" for dong business. By "late" Rome it was codified.
There might just be a typo toward the end; but maybe not considering the Romans.
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Old 06-22-2018, 03:37 AM
Kamino Neko Kamino Neko is offline
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The Romans were apparently actually rather prudish. (Sorry for the cite...it's the best linkable one I could find.)
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Old 06-23-2018, 12:11 AM
Melbourne Melbourne is offline
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The Romans were apparently actually rather prudish. (Sorry for the cite...it's the best linkable one I could find.)
I've seen it argued either way. Another possibility that has been suggested is that some Romans were rather prudish in public, but other Romans in private were rather not. Like modern America.
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Old 06-25-2018, 08:07 PM
Peter Morris Peter Morris is offline
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Dibble's first law of sociology: Some do, some don't.

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