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  #1651  
Old 05-02-2019, 02:58 PM
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This is Yzma, the emperor's advisor. Living proof that dinosaurs once roamed the Earth.
  #1652  
Old 05-03-2019, 09:04 AM
Dendarii Dame is offline
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What if they have claws and big teeth?
  #1653  
Old 05-03-2019, 09:08 AM
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Then out of nowhere, biggest bear you've ever seen! Its hide littered with the weapons of fallen warriors. Its face scared with one dead eye. I drew my sword and...
  #1654  
Old 05-03-2019, 01:55 PM
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"How many men does it take to deliver a message?"
[grins; readies arrow] "One."
  #1655  
Old 05-03-2019, 03:40 PM
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One song, I have but one song,
One song, only for you
  #1656  
Old 05-04-2019, 03:14 PM
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You wasted all my time
Learning how to rhyme.
  #1657  
Old 05-05-2019, 01:44 PM
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Ho hum, the tune is dumb
The words don't mean a thing
Isn't this a silly song
For anyone to sing
  #1658  
Old 05-05-2019, 03:18 PM
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Sing wistfully in windowsills.
  #1659  
Old 05-05-2019, 03:49 PM
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I don't dance. And I definitely don't sing.
  #1660  
Old 05-05-2019, 04:29 PM
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So you're saying that you don't have rhythm
But listen at what you're doing right there
With that stamp and a book you've got a real nice hook
Sounds to me like you've got rhythm to spare
  #1661  
Old 05-05-2019, 06:07 PM
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Want to know a secret? Promise not to tell?
We are standing by a wishing well.
Make a wish into the well, that's all you have to do.
And if you hear it echoing, your wish will soon come true.
  #1662  
Old 05-06-2019, 05:14 PM
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When you wish upon a star
Makes no diff'rence who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come to you
  #1663  
Old 05-06-2019, 05:22 PM
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Please stand clear of the doors.
Por favor, manténgase alejado de las puertas.
  #1664  
Old 05-06-2019, 05:30 PM
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Wait, don't princesses have to know a lot of manners and stuff?
  #1665  
Old 05-07-2019, 06:34 PM
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Your lessons will commence here, once you pass through this door.
So why not come and join us and see what lies in store.
You'll learn the art of manners of Royal Protocol, (That's right!)
And when to bow and curtsey, for functions big and small!
  #1666  
Old 05-07-2019, 07:06 PM
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Encyclopedia, e-n-c-y-c-l-o-p-e-d-i-a!
  #1667  
Old 05-08-2019, 06:32 PM
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On this journey that you're taking will come the answers that you'll seek.
  #1668  
Old 05-08-2019, 07:02 PM
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Tell me the secret of man's red fire.
  #1669  
Old 05-09-2019, 08:28 AM
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Hey, is the kitchen supposed to have that much fire in it?

Last edited by Dendarii Dame; 05-09-2019 at 08:29 AM.
  #1670  
Old 05-09-2019, 08:53 AM
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Yesterday, I poached an egg. It seemed like the perfect thing to do on perhaps the second worst workday in recorded history.
  #1671  
Old 05-09-2019, 03:18 PM
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Wow, somebody's got issues. Go make some eggs.
  #1672  
Old 05-10-2019, 11:17 PM
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You, mini man! Taking on the jellies! You got serious thrill issues, dude. Awesome.
  #1673  
Old 05-11-2019, 07:59 AM
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These are not Joanna eggs!
  #1674  
Old 05-11-2019, 12:08 PM
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It is tough to be a bird.
  #1675  
Old 05-11-2019, 04:47 PM
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Do not feed the pigeons, it says, and I'm going to feed the pigeons. Sometimes evil just cracks me up.
  #1676  
Old 05-11-2019, 06:08 PM
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Aw, this is great. I'm chained to the only bird in the world who can't fly! Is there anything else I need to know?
  #1677  
Old 05-11-2019, 08:32 PM
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Ratigan: You don't know what a delightful dilemma it was, trying to decide on the most appropriate method for your demise. Oh, I had so many ingenious ideas I didn't know which to choose. So I decided to use them all. Marvelous, isn't it? But, here, let me show you how it works. Picture this. First, a sprightly tune I've recorded especially for you. As the song plays, the cord tightens, and when the song ends, the metal ball is released, rolling along its merry way until...

[points at mousetrap]

Ratigan: Snap!

[points at gun]

Ratigan: Boom!

[points at crossbow]

Ratigan: Twang!

[points at axe]

Ratigan: Thunk!

[points at anvil]

Ratigan: Splat! And so ends the short, undistinguished career of Basil of Baker Street.
  #1678  
Old 05-12-2019, 03:52 PM
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Usually, I'm able to save the day.
  #1679  
Old 05-14-2019, 05:35 PM
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To beat your fear, you need to face it.
  #1680  
Old 05-14-2019, 07:30 PM
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Now, in my never-ending pursuit of domination, I discovered that the best evil rulers used fear to keep people in line. So to get into the right headspace, I did what any logical evil scientist would do: rented all the scary movies in Danville for research. Even the lousy ones like Dead Batteries, which is actually better than its prequel, Batteries That Work, which was...just a bunch of...portable electronic devices...functioning properly.
  #1681  
Old 05-15-2019, 11:56 AM
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If I gave up every time I failed, I would have never invented the meatball cannon.
  #1682  
Old 05-15-2019, 04:24 PM
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"Our castle's gonna have a cannon!"

"Two cannons!"
  #1683  
Old 05-15-2019, 06:21 PM
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nm

Last edited by Prof. Pepperwinkle; 05-15-2019 at 06:22 PM.
  #1684  
Old 05-17-2019, 02:45 PM
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Safe at home.
  #1685  
Old 05-17-2019, 05:20 PM
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So, I'll be building my summer home on a more *magical* hill. Thank you.
  #1686  
Old 05-17-2019, 06:06 PM
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Poisoned dragon's liver?
Poisoned dragon's liver.
Did you poison the dragon, or just the liver?
  #1687  
Old 05-18-2019, 03:58 PM
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I'm going to heave-ho.
  #1688  
Old 05-18-2019, 07:27 PM
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I'm a codfish.
  #1689  
Old 05-18-2019, 07:54 PM
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Close your mouth please, Michael; we are not a codfish.
  #1690  
Old 05-19-2019, 09:23 AM
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You expect me to believe that pack of lies, Mike Wazowski!?
  #1691  
Old 05-19-2019, 03:22 PM
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You disappoint me in every way possible.
  #1692  
Old 05-19-2019, 08:46 PM
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Hello, worthless. Miss me?
  #1693  
Old 05-19-2019, 10:14 PM
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"You're crazy!"
"No. Spiteful, vindictive, very large, but never crazy."
  #1694  
Old 05-20-2019, 10:20 AM
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We're all mad here.
  #1695  
Old 05-20-2019, 06:55 PM
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Is something wrong, Mabel? You just walked past a cat without petting it.
  #1696  
Old Yesterday, 08:08 AM
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We are Siamese if you please
We are Siamese if you don't please
  #1697  
Old Yesterday, 07:27 PM
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You just harmonized with me.
  #1698  
Old Yesterday, 09:28 PM
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Come on, sing with me!
  #1699  
Old Today, 09:45 AM
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Let's all sing like the birdies sing, tweet, tweet tweet, tweet tweet
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