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Old 02-12-2018, 03:50 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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My 15 Year-Old Daughter Just Told Me She's BiSexual -HELP!

Hello,

I was driving my beautiful 15 year-old daughter to her Winter Formal (10th grade) last weekend and the conversation started when she sai that her guy friend said that he's "Pan SexuaL". I was like, "What the heck is that?". She explained it... This night, it was all girls since most guys are "taken"... Let me give you some info on us:

* We are from Texas and my kids always attended private schools, yes, we lived in a bubble up until....
* We moved to Southern California 6 years ago. Kids were still in privates, sheltered from the crazy world out there, for the most part.
* She suddenly got accepted into a very elite arts high school (after portfolios, interviews, grades) and we were all very excited. But we knew there were a lot of gay boys, since it's a performing arts school mainly, though they have other conservatories with more diversity.
* She has always had crushes on boys, since 1st grade, she would write them notes, blush, something she started on her own, never pushed or pressured to like boys by anyone. I even told her she was too young and to focus on school but she ALWAYS had a crush on boys.
* She has an older brother who is 18, and she always thought at least one of his friends were cute.
* We sent her to this school, this is her 3rd semester there and she has mentioned boys many times, she even had a date to last year's Winter Formal and she was very excited about it. BUT she got very disappointed when he didn't show more interest in her after that date.
* This year she also liked a boy but nothing happened... she says there are too many girls to choose from for those straight boys...
* She has a very supportive group of girlfriends who are mostly straight but last weekend she told me some of them were gay. I stopped breathing knowing where the conversation was heading.
* I said, what are you? Since she was talking about others.
* She said: "you will judge me if I tell you" and she laughed a little. She finally said: "I'm bi".
I asked her if she's had any physical/intimate encounters with girls at school and she said no but that whomever she ends up loving in her life, that it wouldn't matter if they were male or female.

Keep in mind, this high school is very, very liberal and we didn't realize how much. I mean, some of the bathroom stalls (we just noticed last week when we visited) have upside down crosses saying "F" Trump and such. Super anti-trump crowd, etc. I don't like him either, but to keep politics out, just so you get an idea on the crowd..

* She has become much more feminist this year and a little of last (9th grade), standing up for LGBTQ folks, etc.

This isn't your typical "I've been gay since I was young", this is something sudden, but when I asked her since when she felt this way, she said about a year or two, which coincides with her entering this school.

She is almost 16 but has never had a serious boyfriend, though she dated one in 8th grade and held hands, etc. but they were never alone for making out and stuff.

I am thinking a few scenarios but I need help, I am freaking out not knowing how to guide her. Of course I was calm and understanding when she told me but I went home and cried all night not knowing how to properly handle it so she wouldn't be hurt or feel unloved like a lot of teens feel. We are very close and we are definitely traditional with our thinking, we are Catholic, which she's also suddenly rebelling against as well, when she used to always lead our table prayer at dinner. We definitely think this could be a case where she's influenced by so many gay people around her meaning that she could be saying that to "fit in" or be cool, get attention, be accepted by others.

It's very, very hard to date boys (she loves boys) because of how many are gay and the straight ones at school are all taken, she said. I'm thinking she feels accepted by the sweet girls and may have developed an attraction to that, because it has nothing to do with sex, she's a virgin and not dating anyone, we talked about it.

We are very involved parents, always ask questions and talk to our kids but this time she didn't tell us for the whole year, but she did open up to her older brother about it A YEAR AGO and we didn't know!!!!!

Help, any ideas? We want to guide her, but part of me wants to pull her out of that school, though I know going into 11th grade is the toughest time to do so! She has a 4.2 GPA, excellent student, amazing human being, kind, caring, loving, not a mean bone, is kind to us her parents, we adore her! Help me please! If I pull her out I KNOW she will gt depressed and her grades will drop. She has ZERO emotional issues meaning, there is no depression, trauma, or divorce, NOTHING, we have a pretty stable and even boring home life.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:00 PM
Superdude Superdude is offline
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Love your daughter. Unconditionally. Who she falls in love with should have no bearing on things.

She sounds like a capable, strong young woman. There's nothing in your post that gives me any reason to believe that she doesn't know what she's doing.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:00 PM
Jake Bullet - Traffic Control! Jake Bullet - Traffic Control! is online now
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Any ideas? Yeah. Here's an idea. Don't ask random strangers on the internet how to raise your kid.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:04 PM
Bryan Ekers Bryan Ekers is online now
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Unless you're prepared to go full Honor-Killing, my advice is to chill the heck out.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:07 PM
Starving Artist Starving Artist is online now
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nm. Maybe later.

Last edited by Starving Artist; 02-12-2018 at 04:09 PM.
  #6  
Old 02-12-2018, 04:07 PM
bobot bobot is offline
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It is good that your first action was to be supportive. I would suggest that you give yourself a break next by not thinking that this is a huge deal.

ETA: What the FUCK, Starving Artist??

Last edited by bobot; 02-12-2018 at 04:09 PM.
  #7  
Old 02-12-2018, 04:07 PM
Sunny Daze Sunny Daze is online now
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Support her choices. Leave her in school, where she seems happy. Love her for who she is (she sounds awesome by the way).

If you do anything else, you run the risk of alienating your daughter, ruining her academic experience just when colleges really care about it, and teaching her that she can't trust you with important personal information.
  #8  
Old 02-12-2018, 04:09 PM
Baron Greenback Baron Greenback is offline
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In the unlikely event that you genuinely joined a random message board to ask advice about this, just let your daughter find her own way and be supportive of her decisions.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:10 PM
Superdude Superdude is offline
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NM
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Last edited by Superdude; 02-12-2018 at 04:13 PM.
  #10  
Old 02-12-2018, 04:13 PM
Jonathan Chance Jonathan Chance is offline
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:15 PM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is online now
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nm. Maybe later.
Thanks ever so much for the preemptive strike. BTW, what's wrong with being bisexual?
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:16 PM
Morgenstern Morgenstern is offline
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Honestly, you don't need help. Your daughter is still your daughter, nothing has really changed.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:23 PM
Lemur866 Lemur866 is online now
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She's figuring out her sexuality, and she might not have it all figured out yet at 15. You don't have to disbelieve your daughter when she tells you she's bisexual, but you don't have to believe her either. She will have to make her own way in the world, and make her own decisions, and some of those decisions won't lead to outcomes you agree with.

In any case, I wouldn't put a lot of stock into a 15 year old's pronouncements about sexuality. Maybe she's really bisexual, maybe she's not. But what difference does it make either way?

Or to put it another way, what are you supposed to do differently now that your daughter has told you this information? The answer is, nothing. Nothing different. I mean, if you were previously making homophobic comments every day, maybe knock that off. But I'm assuming you weren't doing that. Since there's nothing to be done with this information, nothing needs to be done. Just keep on doing what you were doing before, and if by chance she tells you she's going out with some girl, or kissed some girl, just act the same way that you would if she told you she went out with a boy or kissed a boy. Other than that, that's it.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:24 PM
Chimera Chimera is offline
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Originally Posted by Superdude View Post
Love your daughter. Unconditionally. Who she falls in love with should have no bearing on things.

She sounds like a capable, strong young woman. There's nothing in your post that gives me any reason to believe that she doesn't know what she's doing.
Bingo. Done in one.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:26 PM
begbert2 begbert2 is online now
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She's not having sex, right? So it doesn't matter. She can like who she likes, and she can love who she loves, and there ain't nothing wrong with loving everybody. Beats hating them.

If she was having sex, it would be better for her to be having sex with girls than guys - less chance of an unplanned pregnancy.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:30 PM
Starving Artist Starving Artist is online now
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Thanks ever so much for the preemptive strike. BTW, what's wrong with being bisexual?
Don't know why you'd ask this as in my redacted post I made no such claim.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:32 PM
Czarcasm Czarcasm is online now
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Don't know why you'd ask this as in my redacted post I made no such claim.
And there is no way for me to show any evidence to the contrary, is there?
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:38 PM
Starving Artist Starving Artist is online now
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Certainly not, as it was never there to begin with. You've merely chosen to interpret it that way.

And now, so as not to allow myself to be goaded into posting comments that I subsequently reconsidered and withdrew, I'll have nothing further to say about it.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:42 PM
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From what you describe, she is in a school culture that is very artsy. Along with that will be a lot of gender fluidity and experimentation. I hesitate to use the words "peer pressure" because I don't suspect anyone is consciously pressuring her one way or another. It's really more about what is all around her.

She is likely not decided on this, and is testing her own boundries. Will she experiment with a girlfriend for a spell? Likely. If there were a guy she liked who liked her back she probably wouldn't even be talking about this.

But you YOU crying all night about it? What's up with that? Someone could give lessons in being a drama queen!

The worst thing you can do is make A BIG F*CKING DEAL ABOUT IT OVER AND OVER. Just let it slide and let it go. If she wants to talk more about it, she will. If not, don't pester her about it.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:42 PM
DrCube DrCube is offline
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Originally Posted by Colette8 View Post
Help, any ideas? We want to guide her, but part of me wants to pull her out of that school, though I know going into 11th grade is the toughest time to do so! She has a 4.2 GPA, excellent student, amazing human being, kind, caring, loving, not a mean bone, is kind to us her parents, we adore her! Help me please! If I pull her out I KNOW she will gt depressed and her grades will drop. She has ZERO emotional issues meaning, there is no depression, trauma, or divorce, NOTHING, we have a pretty stable and even boring home life.
Help with what? What is the actual problem here? I'm not seeing one.

And why would you pull her out of school?? Sounds like there's nothing but downside if you make that choice. Don't do that please.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:45 PM
snfaulkner snfaulkner is offline
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My 15 Year-Old Daughter Just Told Me She's BiSexual

So?
  #22  
Old 02-12-2018, 04:52 PM
Vinyl Turnip Vinyl Turnip is offline
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Originally Posted by snfaulkner View Post
My 15 Year-Old Daughter Just Told Me She's BiSexual

So?
So? SO????

So, I gotta run to the Straight Dope Message Board, create a new account and tell everybody about it, THAT'S what "so"!
  #23  
Old 02-12-2018, 04:55 PM
Beckdawrek Beckdawrek is online now
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Love that girl, just as she is. At 16 she is still exploring options.
It would almost be criminal to remove her from a school she is succeeding at.
I have raised 3 kids, youngest is in college now. Between 16 and 18 many things can change. And so on, etc.
Do what you have to do to accept her as she is. You can't change it anyway. So accept it. It could be so much worse. Drug use, disease, eating disorder, depression, slutty,, runaway, on and on and on. Count your blessings.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:55 PM
Johnny Ace Johnny Ace is offline
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This isn't your typical "I've been gay since I was young", this is something sudden, but when I asked her since when she felt this way, she said about a year or two, which coincides with her entering this school.
She didn't say she's gay. She said she thinks she's bi. Personally, I think that's an advantage...it doubles one's chances of finding the right one. (Only half joking. OK, maybe two thirds. )

Sounds like you come from a bit of a conservative background. Just realize that she more than likely hasn't. And let her find her way, giving her a little advice along the way. Advice, not ultimata. Or judgment.

Last edited by Johnny Ace; 02-12-2018 at 04:55 PM.
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Old 02-12-2018, 04:59 PM
XT XT is offline
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Love your daughter. Unconditionally. Who she falls in love with should have no bearing on things.

She sounds like a capable, strong young woman. There's nothing in your post that gives me any reason to believe that she doesn't know what she's doing.
Pretty much this. Plus:

What's wrong with being bi-sexual and why is this a problem that needs to be fixed? Support her and let her find her own way is my advice, FWIW. And, just as an aside I have a son that went through the bi-sexual phase before coming down on the homosexual side with a very stable partner who is a great kid.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:01 PM
pulykamell pulykamell is offline
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Love your daughter. Unconditionally. Who she falls in love with should have no bearing on things.

She sounds like a capable, strong young woman. There's nothing in your post that gives me any reason to believe that she doesn't know what she's doing.
I have two daughters, but they're quite young, approx 4 and 2. So this is not something that I think actively about. However, imaganing myself in that future situation when one of them tells me this, I would 100% honestly be BFD. That's for them to figure out and, honestly, none of my business. (I mean, sure my business in the sense that I'm there for them and will be there for them if they're confused and trying to figure things out, but not my business in the sense of pushing them one way or another as for whom to love and be attracted to.) I would support them unconditionally, absolutely, not even a question.

Last edited by pulykamell; 02-12-2018 at 05:02 PM.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:03 PM
begbert2 begbert2 is online now
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I have two daughters, but they're quite young, approx 4 and 2. So this is not something that I think actively about. However, imaganing myself in that future situation when one of them tells me this, I would 100% honestly be BFD. That's for them to figure out and, honestly, none of my business. (I mean, sure my business in the sense that I'm there for them and will be there for them if they're confused and trying to figure things out, but not my business in the sense of pushing them one way or another as for whom to love and be attracted to.) I would support them unconditionally.
I have no kids but if I did I would be you can love whoever you want but you can't date anybody! Until you're thirty!
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:05 PM
Lemur866 Lemur866 is online now
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Yeah, there are two types of people who lie about being bisexual. There are the straight kids who say they're bi because it's cool and edgy. Then there are the gay kids who say they're bi to ease people into it.

Then there are the people who say they're bi because they're bi.
  #29  
Old 02-12-2018, 05:13 PM
Inigo Montoya Inigo Montoya is offline
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I went home and cried all night not knowing how to properly handle it so she wouldn't be hurt or feel unloved like a lot of teens feel.
I want to clarify this. Were the tears because you were thrown a parenting curve and just didn't know how to deal with it, or were the tears because OMG my little girl is amenable to girl/girl action? The kinds of responses you get from this board really depend on what you meant. I have 2 daughters, they both got sexual before I was mentally ready for it. It's tough to accept, but it happens no matter how badly you want them to stay hooked on Sesame Street and The Lion King. Put another way, would you really be any less off-balance if she had been talking about the stuff she was doing to some dude's Johnson?

I get it that Catholicism and homosexuality (however noncommittal) are incompatible, and if you're a true believer then the source of your concern is fairly obvious. I'd suggest getting spiritual advise from your church, and limiting your exploits here to parenting advice and learning how to accept without judgment--and yeah, I get the irony of that because The Dope in general judges the fuck out of 'phobes. It's complicated. But I agree, Superdude nailed it in the first response.

The worst thing you can do is lose your cool:
- Angel hat on: keeping calm with your daughter and letting her examine her sexuality on her own terms will build trust. As a Catholic, you know she can always hit the confessional if she decides this was all a mistake and she prefers to cleave to church doctrine on the matter

- Devil hat on: If you were confident Bi/Homo is wrong, unnatural, and against God then you would also be confident she will 'come around' in time, confess, and move on with the resolve to avoid womanizing in the future. But freaking out suggests you are less than confident this will be the case, that she is morally and spiritually weak enough to be led away for good from The Right Way.
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Last edited by Inigo Montoya; 02-12-2018 at 05:14 PM.
  #30  
Old 02-12-2018, 05:20 PM
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This post sounds as absurd to me as if someone had written "My 15 Year-Old Daughter Just Told Me She likes both Coke and Pepsi -HELP!".

If you are concerned/alarmed/saddened by the idea that your daughter could have romantic love for both sexes, then (as the kids say) 'that's a you problem'. You have had an irrational response to an innocuous piece of information.
Your daughter doesn't need help, she is fine. However, you may need some help, so I would recommend counselling to try to determine why it is that you have this response to the concept of bisexuality.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:24 PM
Chronos Chronos is online now
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Let me ask you this: What would your response be if your daughter told you she were heterosexual? Is there any reason why your response should be any different?
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:30 PM
Gatopescado Gatopescado is online now
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My kid doesn't talk to me at all. If he was on fire, I wouldn't know until I smelled the smoke. Count your blessings.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:35 PM
running coach running coach is offline
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So? SO????

So, I gotta run to the Straight Dope Message Board, create a new account and tell everybody about it, THAT'S what "so"!
And so desperate for help that she posts and leaves without waiting for a single answer.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:44 PM
Not a Platypus Not a Platypus is offline
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I'd highly recommend you relax and just support your kid, even if you think it's just a phase or whatever you think it is, assuming you don't believe she knows how she feels. I was about her age when I came out to my mom, she adamantly refused to believe me when I told her I had a date with a girl, and I've very rarely spoken to her about my relationships since then. The only reason she knows I'm in an unconventional relationship now is that something came up to make it necessary to tell her, and several years later she's still noticeably uncomfortable whenever it comes up. It's a shitty feeling to know my mom is not happy about who I am.

Your daughter is still your daughter. You becoming aware of what/who she likes does not change that.

Also her age makes a lot of sense for figuring out you're bisexual. We live in a very hetero-normative world, where you know you're "supposed" to like the opposite sex, so that's not really noteworthy, but it can take longer to realize you also like those cute girls (or boys) in the same way. Liking both can take a little time to wrap your head around. There's a significant increase in homosexual exposure and kids have more and more examples to relate to, but bisexuals and asexuals are still in a weird closeted space for various reasons.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:49 PM
Novelty Bobble Novelty Bobble is online now
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She's 15, you really don't need to think about it any deeper than that. At that age there's a better than average chance that hormones are asserting themselves and she's experimenting sexually and it is perfectly normal for part of that to be same-sex. Don't fret about it, support her. This is 2018 and it is no big deal. She'll work it out for herself and she'll have an easier time doing so if you don't make a fuss about it.
In any case you can't "turn her straight" and the school won't "make" her gay or bi so any actions you take are doomed to failure and you could end up with a daughter who remains stubbornly gay or bi and thoroughly pissed off at being pulled from a school she likes.

Chill, she actually did talk to you about it. You should be immensely proud that she did. Now just go and hug her and tell that it was a shock but that you don't care and whenever she needs to talk she can.
She said that she thought you might judge her, it would be such a shame if you proved her right.
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Last edited by Novelty Bobble; 02-12-2018 at 05:50 PM.
  #36  
Old 02-12-2018, 05:51 PM
Left Hand of Dorkness Left Hand of Dorkness is online now
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And so desperate for help that she posts and leaves without waiting for a single answer.
Aw, c'mon. What are the chances that a brand new account posting a story with a lot of details about the sexuality of a teenage girl and asking for opinions in a way guaranteed to rile people up--what are the chances that that would be less than sincere?

So cynical, Dopers are. So cynical.
  #37  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:05 PM
GreysonCarlisle GreysonCarlisle is offline
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Originally Posted by Colette8 View Post
* She has become much more feminist this year and a little of last (9th grade), standing up for LGBTQ folks, etc.
More people like your daughter would make the world a better place.

Is she bi? Maybe, maybe not. Either way, the best support you can give is to shrug and say, "OK. Pass the peas, please. I love you."
  #38  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:27 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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OMgosh, you are so right, thanks for your kind advise.
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Old 02-12-2018, 06:27 PM
AHunter3 AHunter3 is online now
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Congratulations on your daughter. Sounds like she's got her feet under her.
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Old 02-12-2018, 06:28 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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More people like your daughter would make the world a better place.

Is she bi? Maybe, maybe not. Either way, the best support you can give is to shrug and say, "OK. Pass the peas, please. I love you."
Love it, thank you!
  #41  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:34 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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More people like your daughter would make the world a better place.

Is she bi? Maybe, maybe not. Either way, the best support you can give is to shrug and say, "OK. Pass the peas, please. I love you."
Love it, thank you!
  #42  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:34 PM
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I assume that you have trusted your daughter's judgement before, and I'm pretty sure that you can trust her now. She isn't getting into drugs or gangs, or whatever; she's just trying to figure out who she loves. Honestly, the risks are also really low, almost certainly much lower than what could happen if she dated the wrong guy.

Have you thought about going to a support group or a PFLAG meeting for yourself? I just talked with the health section of the Los Angeles LGBT Center, and they recommended PFLAG LA as well. Knowing how I felt going through some of this stuff, I suspect that all of this will seem completely alien at first. It really isn't; it's just people from all sorts of walks of life working together to have healthy lives.

This is tough to say, but I honestly think that the only way that you could lose your daughter is by trying to stop her. If she rebels, then there goes your relationship. If she's straight, then you may just be taking away her friends. That said, there's a chance that she could be attracted to women. If she represses that, then there's a chance that she could marry and be stuck in a loveless marriage with kids before she finally can't take any more. This is actually common. I don't get out much, and I've known one woman who lost everything while coming out and getting out of a marriage, and I know of another who eventually overdosed (I'm friends with the ex-husband. It's awkward.)

Last edited by cornflakes; 02-12-2018 at 06:37 PM.
  #43  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:37 PM
don't mind me don't mind me is offline
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Here's some great advice from Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG). I'd strongly recommend checking for a local chapter near you. Thousands of your neighbors have been through this and can help.

ETA: Well, shit, cornflakes.

Last edited by don't mind me; 02-12-2018 at 06:38 PM.
  #44  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:38 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Left Hand of Dorkness View Post
Aw, c'mon. What are the chances that a brand new account posting a story with a lot of details about the sexuality of a teenage girl and asking for opinions in a way guaranteed to rile people up--what are the chances that that would be less than sincere?

So cynical, Dopers are. So cynical.
Thank you for your reply, I just found this forum today and posted this, so yes, I left... ummm... because I don't sit in front of the computer all day, ha ha... seriously, it is a genuine concern and I thank those who genuinely wanted to help me with advise. I am much more calm now and I appreciate you all's help. I came from a very traditional and somewhat homophobic home and lost both my parents a few years ago, so it's not easy raising kids alone in this day and age. And I don't agree with my parents having been homophobic but that was then and this is now and I love my daughter... Thank you again!
  #45  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:47 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cornflakes View Post
I assume that you have trusted your daughter's judgement before, and I'm pretty sure that you can trust her now. She isn't getting into drugs or gangs, or whatever; she's just trying to figure out who she loves. Honestly, the risks are also really low, almost certainly much lower than what could happen if she dated the wrong guy.

Have you thought about going to a support group or a PFLAG meeting for yourself? I just talked with the health section of the Los Angeles LGBT Center, and they recommended PFLAG LA as well. Knowing how I felt going through some of this stuff, I suspect that all of this will seem completely alien at first. It really isn't; it's just people from all sorts of walks of life working together to have healthy lives.

This is tough to say, but I honestly think that the only way that you could lose your daughter is by trying to stop her. If she rebels, then there goes your relationship. If she's straight, then you may just be taking away her friends. That said, there's a chance that she could be attracted to women. If she represses that, then there's a chance that she could marry and be stuck in a loveless marriage with kids before she finally can't take any more. This is actually common. I don't get out much, and I've known one woman who lost everything while coming out and getting out of a marriage, and I know of another who eventually overdosed (I'm friends with the ex-husband. It's awkward.)


Wow, I am so sorry to hear that about those wonderful women in those situations... thank you so much for helping me, I don't get out much either and have never dealt with something like this... you are so right and this is definitely helping me be more knowledgeable, so next time we talk (she and I) I actually know what the heck I am doing, and being supporting and loving, which we always are, but this was a surprise and though I remained calm, emotions came out later. I think it's fear. I don't know of what, but we are all raised differently and we can't judge how others feel or think, so for those who made comments about why the heck I was on here asking for advise, I am new to the forum and have nothing to be ashamed of. I am trying to deal with this with the utmost respect toward another human being, my wonderful daughter whom I love more than anything, and I would never want to say stupid things the way my parents and grandparents did... and I did great and will improve thanks to those kind folks who truly cared to respond in a caring way to help me. Love it!

Again, thank you and I will look into the above links, have never heard of it but will research. Thanks!
  #46  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:48 PM
GreysonCarlisle GreysonCarlisle is offline
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Originally Posted by Colette8 View Post
Thank you for your reply, I just found this forum today and posted this
Welcome to the Straight Dope!

Quote:
so yes, I left... ummm... because I don't sit in front of the computer all day, ha ha...
Cute, but we've got you now. They're always so adorable when they're new. Before you know it, you'll be wondering where the days went.
  #47  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:50 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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Thank you! I appreciate your kind reply!
  #48  
Old 02-12-2018, 06:57 PM
begbert2 begbert2 is online now
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For the record, Colette8, I sympathize. I was raised in a homophobic environment with no exposure to anything else, and live in terror that I will end up being all homophobic to somebody someday. (Similarly, racism. I try not to be! But if you have no contact whatsoever with anybody of the minority class, it's hard to normalize your reactions...)

All you can do is try to be better than your upbringing.
  #49  
Old 02-12-2018, 07:01 PM
Colette8 Colette8 is offline
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Thank you. Please chill, buddy... I had to rush to pick up my other 3 kiddos... I don't sit on the computer all day, but I did come back to some interesting advice which I appreciate. Have a nice night and if you don't like the posts, keep scrolling... no need for negativity...
  #50  
Old 02-12-2018, 07:02 PM
Leaffan Leaffan is online now
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Some of us here (me included) have kids who have come out as transgender.

The best advice ever is to be completely loving and supportive. There's really no other option. I've talked to the social workers and psychologists. Without family support the suicide rate greatly increases.

Think about that option.
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