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Old 01-07-2019, 04:01 PM
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Literal complaints at lyrics

"I got a girl, she lives up the hill.
She won't do it, but her sister will."

Oh, nice - screwing around on your woman?



"You gotta be bad, you gotta be bold
You gotta be wiser, you gotta be hard
You gotta be tough, you gotta be stronger
You gotta be cool, you gotta be calm
You gotta stay together"

Oh fuck so off with the checklist horseshit.



"Take my hand and pull me down,
But I'll put up with it,
Cause I'm easy" (Kieth Carridine's one-hit wonder)

Right - you do wimpy you, then.



"I hear the to-tal mass re-tain!"

Oh what abstruse horse-hockey are you going on about now, Jon Anderson?



"It's a clean machine!"

Aren't you just the quaintest sod.



Should come up with a few more after some more lawnchair contemplations......
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Old 01-07-2019, 04:28 PM
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I got nothin' right now, but I'm subscribing anyway, because this has entertaining potential. And I'm sure to come up with something myself, eventually.
  #3  
Old 01-07-2019, 04:59 PM
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Kiss: "I got a '35 Chevy on a '55 frame
Can't even spell my name"

This guy must have had someone forge his signature for any contractual documents?
  #4  
Old 01-07-2019, 05:24 PM
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"I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant
But nothing
I said nothing can take away these blues
'Cause nothing compares
Nothing compares to you
"

Oh, right, I mean more to you than a meal, then? Thanks for not much.

j
  #5  
Old 01-07-2019, 05:38 PM
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Aaah... it was going to be a silly comment....

Last edited by bump; 01-07-2019 at 05:38 PM.
  #6  
Old 01-07-2019, 05:41 PM
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Being from the Carolinas, I've always wondered why a friend of James Taylor would hit him from behind.
  #7  
Old 01-07-2019, 05:52 PM
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Originally Posted by Guest-starring: Id! View Post
"It's a clean machine!"

Aren't you just the quaintest sod.
15 or so years ago I sang it that way and my mom said that she thought it was "gleam machine" and I was like "that's probably right, after all they wouldn't use the exact same adjective to describe something twice, right? Cause that would be silly." ... maybe not
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Old 01-07-2019, 05:59 PM
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I got nothin' right now, but I'm subscribing anyway, because this has entertaining potential. And I'm sure to come up with something myself, eventually.
Thanks!
Indeed - let your inner cynic guide you.

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Kiss: "I got a '35 Chevy on a '55 frame
Can't even spell my name"

This guy must have had someone forge his signature for any contractual documents?
I have to say those lyrics are great. While we're dealing with those gibronies:

"In just a few more hours, and I'll be right home to you."



"I think I hear them callin' - oh Beth, what can I do?"

Yeah, conflicted, huh? That...push/pull, you're despairing over?
(Yup - looks like the boys got the ol' Parisienne convertible out tonight - later, Beth!)



"I kissed a few and once did sit
On Ivor the Engine Driver's lap
And later with him, had a nap" (A Quick One - The Who)

Um EXCUSE ME what were you up to, young man?
  #9  
Old 01-07-2019, 06:03 PM
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Originally Posted by Treppenwitz View Post
"I can eat my dinner in a fancy restaurant
But nothing
I said nothing can take away these blues
'Cause nothing compares
Nothing compares to you
"

Oh, right, I mean more to you than a meal, then? Thanks for not much.

j
more importantly, everything compares to everything. May not be favorable or meaningful but still compares. I can compare the Marianas Trench to a Buick but why would I?
  #10  
Old 01-07-2019, 06:24 PM
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"I bought a 30 Ford wagon and we call it a woodie." That's because you're a dick, friend.
  #11  
Old 01-07-2019, 07:14 PM
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"I hear the to-tal mass re-tain!"

Oh what abstruse horse-hockey are you going on about now, Jon Anderson?


......
I am a Yes fan from way back, but the older I get, the more ridiculous his lyrics seem. And they started off pretty silly.
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Old 01-07-2019, 07:23 PM
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"Please allow me to introduce myself"

And then he never does. He just hints at who he is and says "Hope you guess my name".

Okay, he does say "Just call me Lucifer" but while you can call him that, it apparently isn't his actual name. Because after he says it, he's still asking "what's my name" and "can you guess my name".

Last edited by Little Nemo; 01-07-2019 at 07:28 PM.
  #13  
Old 01-07-2019, 07:30 PM
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Sheryl Crow, All I Wanna Do...

Then he lights every match in an oversized pack
Lettin' each one burn down to his
Thick fingers before blowin' and cursin' them out

If you can curse at a match and it goes out, you got some 'splainin' to do.
  #14  
Old 01-07-2019, 07:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Typo Negative View Post
I am a Yes fan from way back, but the older I get, the more ridiculous his lyrics seem. And they started off pretty silly.
Chris Squire had many WTF spats with Jon over his lyrics. (heh - understandable - the amazing bassist sang a lot of back-up)



"Don't want to close my eyes
I don't want to fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, baby
And I don't wanna miss a thing."

Ok - sooooo.... Your narcolepsy is that bad that you're afraid you'll nod off while admiring her?
  #15  
Old 01-07-2019, 08:32 PM
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More YES:

"In and around the lake
Mountains come out of the sky and they stand there"

Well, what the hell else are mountains going to do??
  #16  
Old 01-07-2019, 08:40 PM
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or - "it makes the chill...dren, really ring."

Like, what - they all form a ring so that there's one big halo over them?

Or rampantly play knocky-knocky-nine door?
  #17  
Old 01-07-2019, 08:46 PM
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I just hope this doesn't become an eventual Jon Anderson pit thread.
  #18  
Old 01-07-2019, 08:48 PM
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Louie Louie, oh no no no, me gotta go, oh no
Louie Louie, oh baby, me gotta go



Ok, so just go already!

Last edited by blondebear; 01-07-2019 at 08:49 PM.
  #19  
Old 01-07-2019, 08:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Little Nemo View Post
"Please allow me to introduce myself"

And then he never does. He just hints at who he is and says "Hope you guess my name".

Okay, he does say "Just call me Lucifer" but while you can call him that, it apparently isn't his actual name. Because after he says it, he's still asking "what's my name" and "can you guess my name".
He's introducing himself as a man of wealth and taste.
  #20  
Old 01-07-2019, 09:11 PM
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Slow Moving Vehicle Slow Moving Vehicle is offline
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Iím just a girl in the world
Thatís all that youíll let me be...


Gwen, whoís the jerk preventing you from joining NASAís Astronaut Training Program?!
  #21  
Old 01-07-2019, 09:18 PM
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From "Lowlife" by Theory of a Deadman:

"I got an '82 Fiero with a car seat in the middle
Broken down on the Interstate"

No way. Fieros were built from '84 to '88.
  #22  
Old 01-07-2019, 09:19 PM
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"Well, I'd rather see you dead, little girl
Than to be with another man
You better keep your head, little girl
Or you won't know where I am
[later]
Baby, I'm determined
And I'd rather see you dead"


Roity roit then.
John - you misogynistic, homicidal scumbag piece of shit.
  #23  
Old 01-07-2019, 09:43 PM
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multi-Elvin Bishop:

"I must have been through about a million girls."

riiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

brah.

"I'd love 'em then I'd leave 'em alone
I didn't care how much they cried, no sir
Their tears left me cold as a stone"

Gee, what a prince.
Trying to model yourself after the Tom Cruise character in "Magnolia"?





"I'm in you..............you're in me."

Um, no, Pete.
No, don't go there.
  #24  
Old 01-07-2019, 10:10 PM
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Way, way back many centuries ago,
Not long after the Bible began,
Jacob lived in the land of Canaan
(A fine example of a family man).

Jacob! Jacob and sons,
Depended on farming to earn their keep.
Jacob! Jacob and sons,
Spent all of the day in the fields with sheep.


Sounds more like ranching to me...
  #25  
Old 01-07-2019, 10:20 PM
Covfefe Covfefe is offline
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"I'm in you..............you're in me."

Um, no, Pete.
No, don't go there.
At least when Queens of the Stone Age had those same lyrics in a song, it was no secret they were metaphorically referencing drugs.
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Old 01-07-2019, 10:34 PM
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A couple of designer friends give each other "creative homework assignments". One was to illustrate song lyrics. Everyone else's were serious poetry, but I added some cynical commentary. This was back when "Grenade" by Bruno Mars was all over the airwaves...

I'd stop a grenade for you.
Put my hand on a blade for you.
I'd jump in front of a train for you...


Wai-wai-wait, wha...?

Look, I get that throwing yourself on a live grenade might save your loved one's life (though why not throw it out the window? Then everyone lives).
But jumping in front of a train is going to have exactly ZERO effect. What, you think you're going to deflect the train by a few degrees? Or slow it down til getting hit by it is merely an annoyance?

If the girl that Bruno Mars wrote this for sees this: Run. Away.
And get yourself a smarter boyfriend. Or at least a more practical one...
  #27  
Old 01-07-2019, 11:52 PM
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Loverboy: "You gotta start from the start..."

Yeah, you do. That's why its called that. Fucking intuitive, you fucks.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wheelz View Post
More YES:

"In and around the lake
Mountains come out of the sky and they stand there"

Well, what the hell else are mountains going to do??
A huge fan, but I've always had a slight problem with this.

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Originally Posted by Slow Moving Vehicle View Post
Iím just a girl in the world
Thatís all that youíll let me be...

And the irony is, who the fuck ever heard another word from the rest of that band?
  #28  
Old 01-08-2019, 12:00 AM
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There's a song (Second chance, by Shinedown) that mentions "I just saw Halley's comet, she waved"

And the songwriter was about 8 when Halley's comet last came by. So every time I hear the song I think no you didn't "just" see that! Why that bugs me more than the writer talking about having conversations with the man in the moon, I don't know.

Last edited by raventhief; 01-08-2019 at 12:01 AM.
  #29  
Old 01-08-2019, 12:01 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wheelz View Post
More YES:

"In and around the lake
Mountains come out of the sky and they stand there"

Well, what the hell else are mountains going to do??
They could move around. They could grow. They could melt. They could do a hell of a lot of things, actually.

You have to consider the context.
  #30  
Old 01-08-2019, 12:15 AM
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But the song I truly hate is lips of an Angel by Hinder:

Well, my girl's in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name, etc etc, emotional yearning, blah blah



Break up with your current if you are seriously lying there wishing she were your ex.
  #31  
Old 01-08-2019, 12:19 AM
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Quote:
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They could move around. They could grow. They could melt. They could do a hell of a lot of things, actually.

You have to consider the context.
After all, these mountains did just come out of the sky, instead of the regular way.

ETA: Personally, I kind of like it when lyrics just give up and don't try to make any sense. I don't really know how I feel about his lyrics, really. They seem like they're on the verge of trying to say something.

Last edited by scabpicker; 01-08-2019 at 12:22 AM.
  #32  
Old 01-08-2019, 02:19 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ethilrist View Post
Sheryl Crow, All I Wanna Do...

Then he lights every match in an oversized pack
Lettin' each one burn down to his
Thick fingers before blowin' and cursin' them out
Au contraire, that is a GREAT lyric. In fact that whole song is full of poetry.

On the other mitt, I have some entries of my own. I think it's been a while since I mocked Bryan Adams:

Please forgive me, I know not what I do
Please forgive me, I can't stop loving you


If you NEED to be forgiven for that, then you probably SHOULDN'T BE

Also, Samantha Jade:

Don't you wanna be my Soldier?
Now, would you fight for me?
D-d-d-die for me?


Relationship Red Flag: "Why oh why won't you DIE FOR MEEEEE!!!" (I picture the glowing red eyes, fangs and talons springing out at around this point)
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  #33  
Old 01-08-2019, 02:59 AM
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Loverboy: "You gotta start from the start..."

Yeah, you do. That's why its called that. Fucking intuitive, you fucks.[/I]

"She was born the queen of the broken hearts."

Huh, quite the operator at such a young age.


"I'm even on my knees, making love to whoever I please."

who-kaaaaaaaaay, well, then, Mike, yeah, I'll just leave ya to that, then.



More I think about it - I thought there'd been another thread similar to this in the not-too-distant past. Not the really good thread about literally-interpreted videos (which, IIRC, had a good post on "Total Eclipse of the Heart"). Maybe there's been an improbable lyrics thread?


Anyway, getting back to bloody Kiss again, I had to print out the whole thing, this time (well, minus one line to avoid you-know-what):

"Don't want to wait 'til you know me better
Let's just be glad for the time together
Life's such a treat and it's time you taste it
There ain't a reason on earth to waste it
It ain't a crime to be good to yourself
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah it's only right now
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah, come on, come on
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh uh
Don't need to wait for an invitation
You gotta live like you're on vacation
There's something sweet you can't buy with money lick it up, lick it up
It's all you need, so believe me honey
It ain't a crime to be good to yourself
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah it's only right now
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah, come on, come on
Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah"

(heh - eliminated a "Lick it up, lick it up, ooh yeah" line to take care of that)
Should I really unearth what's at the bottom of this number?
And what's with the line "It ain't a crime to be good to yourself" - is that some kind of motivational feel-goodery for sperm-eating?
  #34  
Old 01-08-2019, 03:09 AM
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I think it's been a while since I mocked Bryan Adams
Bryan: If you're gonna write a song called "Cuts Like a Knife", do you think maybe - just maybe - the line "you've been letting go" might bring about one or two snickers from under the stands?
Or let me guess - you and your bandmates, sittin around, ruminating over the title and possible lyrics, maybe getting a little high, and someone thought "Tee-hee let's throw an actual fart joke in there. No one will notice!"

Last edited by Guest-starring: Id!; 01-08-2019 at 03:13 AM.
  #35  
Old 01-08-2019, 05:21 AM
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"Bye, bye, miss American pie,
Drove my Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry."

If the levy was part of a flood-control system, being dry is a good thing.
  #36  
Old 01-08-2019, 07:17 AM
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He went to Hollywood, got a tattoo
He met a girl out there with a tattoo too

Oy. I love Tom Petty, but that's right out of the Steve Miller school of terrible lines and rhymes.
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Old 01-08-2019, 07:18 AM
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When we have dinner, sometimes I'll ask for the "lost shaker of salt".
  #38  
Old 01-08-2019, 08:34 AM
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He went to Hollywood, got a tattoo
He met a girl out there with a tattoo too

Oy. I love Tom Petty, but that's right out of the Steve Miller school of terrible lines and rhymes.
She had THE tattoo too.


I hate that line myself, but her having the same tattoo does change the meaning a little bit.
  #39  
Old 01-08-2019, 09:07 AM
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Quote:
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"Bye, bye, miss American pie,
Drove my Chevy to the levy but the levy was dry."

If the levy was part of a flood-control system, being dry is a good thing.
It sounds as though he's disappointed too. So what, exactly, was he hoping to do with his Chevy, in a wet levy?
  #40  
Old 01-08-2019, 09:43 AM
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The Stainless Steel Rat The Stainless Steel Rat is online now
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"...As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti."

Umm, no--Serengeti National Park is over 120 miles from Kilimanjaro and is very hard if not impossible to see from there (I have been to both places).
  #41  
Old 01-08-2019, 09:43 AM
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I actually listened to the lyrics of Wham's "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" recently. The point of the song, such as it is, is that his lover's been going out dancing at night without him and he wants to be awakened to go out and dance too.

Until the final verse, when he suggests that instead of going out, they stay home in bed. And I thought, well, that other person wanted to go dancing, so as soon as you roll over and start snoring, Mister, they'll be up and off just like every other night without bothering to wake you since you didn't really want to go-go after all.

Last edited by Miss Mapp; 01-08-2019 at 09:44 AM.
  #42  
Old 01-08-2019, 09:44 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Madness's Our House

Our house in the middle of our street

I hope you mean "in the middle of our block." Building a house in the middle of the street would be very illegal and very, very dangerous.
  #43  
Old 01-08-2019, 09:47 AM
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Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas View Post
Madness's Our House

Our house in the middle of our street

I hope you mean "in the middle of our block." Building a house in the middle of the street would be very illegal and very, very dangerous.
It's a British thing--houses are "in" the street, not "on" the street. (Although I suspect Madness is playing with the difference between American and UK terms to suggest the idea of the old home planted smack in the middle of the road.)
  #44  
Old 01-08-2019, 10:09 AM
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If Scripture / hymns / Prayer Book content can be counted as "lyrics": for a very long time, kids have been having these kind of problems with stuff generally in the "religion department".

I -- as a bright, pedantic, literal-minded and no doubt very annoying child -- quarrelled strongly with Psalm 107 verse 23, "They that go down to the sea in ships..." As I saw the issue: to get to the seashore, you have to travel on land -- which obviously, a ship cannot do; so how in the name of goodness, can people "go down to the sea in ships"?

It struck me as nonsensical; I was too young to "get" either the business of grey areas in this line -- estuaries, creeks, etc., down which you can sail your ship to get onto the open sea; or the whole "poetic / figures of speech" thing, by which artists-with-words may be granted indulgence if it doesn't totally make sense, but sounds good.
  #45  
Old 01-08-2019, 10:13 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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It's a British thing--houses are "in" the street, not "on" the street. (Although I suspect Madness is playing with the difference between American and UK terms to suggest the idea of the old home planted smack in the middle of the road.)
I did not know that. Ignorance fought.

Styx's Come Sail Away:

We lived happily together, so the story goes
But somehow we missed out on the pot of gold.

I always sing it:

We lived happily ever after, the story's told
But somehow we missed out on the port of gold.

It makes more sense, and it rhymes.
  #46  
Old 01-08-2019, 10:32 AM
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Originally Posted by The Stainless Steel Rat View Post
"...As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti."

Umm, no--Serengeti National Park is over 120 miles from Kilimanjaro and is very hard if not impossible to see from there (I have been to both places).
Is it possible the statement's trying to convey that it's Olympus, not Killmanjaro, rising above the Serengetti? The message does seem a little muddled.

Sweet's "Fox on the Run"

"I don't wanna know your name
'Cause you don't look the same
The way you did before
Okay, you think you got a pretty face
But the rest of you is out of place
You looked alright before"

So - because she had the nerve to change her looks, her name is now mud?
And that her ostensibly pretty face is somehow not in accord with the rest of her?
Not to mention - no longer looking any good?

Being dickish, dude.
  #47  
Old 01-08-2019, 11:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by digs View Post
If the girl that Bruno Mars wrote this for sees this: Run. Away.
And get yourself a smarter boyfriend. Or at least a more practical one...
And the final line of the chorus after he lays out all the weapons and trains he'd eat for her is, "But you won't do the same," delivered as though this is some tragic truth. It should be, "But unlike me you're sane."
  #48  
Old 01-08-2019, 11:23 AM
Just Asking Questions Just Asking Questions is offline
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Springsteen, Racing in the Streets

I got a 69 Chevy with a 396
Fuelie heads and a Hurst on the floor

General car ignorance. Fuelie heads are for small block Chevies. They won't fit.

There's no quick lyric to quote, but I always get annoyed at Tangled Up In Blue. it seems like the perspective and timeline shift all over the place, and not in a good poetic way, but in a "I forgot what I was singing about" way.

And The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia really conveys the Southern Gothic feel, but it makes no damn sense!
  #49  
Old 01-08-2019, 11:35 AM
california jobcase california jobcase is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RobDog View Post
It sounds as though he's disappointed too. So what, exactly, was he hoping to do with his Chevy, in a wet levy?
One can levy a tax, but he drove his Chevy to the levee!!
  #50  
Old 01-08-2019, 12:10 PM
Little Nemo Little Nemo is offline
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Location: Western New York
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie-Xmas View Post
I did not know that. Ignorance fought.

Styx's Come Sail Away:

We lived happily together, so the story goes
But somehow we missed out on the pot of gold.

I always sing it:

We lived happily ever after, the story's told
But somehow we missed out on the port of gold.

It makes more sense, and it rhymes.
In a similar vein, there's the song "Angel in Blue" by the J. Geils Band. It has the lines:

And the bees they had stung her
The birds they had flown
There were guys she could number
But none had she known


The line should have been:

And the bees they had stung her
The birds they had flown
There were guys she could number
But none to count on


The connection of number and count would have tied it together, like the birds and the bees in the previous pair of lines.

I'll grant that flown/on aren't as good a rhyme as flown/known. But this is a band that rhymed desk/dress, down/sound, grind/mine, and him/win.
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