#10201  
Old 04-15-2018, 02:17 PM
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With Wendell Berry
I ate blueberries, and then
Got beriberi
  #10202  
Old 04-15-2018, 04:04 PM
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Got beriberi?
Not selling much thiamine
with that lame catch-phrase.
  #10203  
Old 04-16-2018, 03:10 PM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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with that lame catch-phrase,
I just sold some worthless junk
To eBay suckers.
  #10204  
Old 04-18-2018, 08:01 PM
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To eBay suckers
I sell knock-off underwear
Called Fruit of my Loins
  #10205  
Old 04-19-2018, 08:41 AM
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Called Fruit of my Loins
Until the DNA test
Proved he was not so.
  #10206  
Old 04-19-2018, 02:24 PM
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Proved that he was not so
Smart, Dumb Donald took his fish
Outside for a walk
  #10207  
Old 04-21-2018, 12:13 AM
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Outside for a walk
I got stuck in a time-warp.
I stalked myself home.
  #10208  
Old 04-21-2018, 07:14 AM
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I stalked myself home
said celery, I gave him
head said the cabbage
  #10209  
Old 04-21-2018, 10:16 AM
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"Head," said the cabbage,
"So, what's your favorite film
starring The Monkees?"

Last edited by burpo the wonder mutt; 04-21-2018 at 10:17 AM.
  #10210  
Old 04-22-2018, 02:03 PM
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starring the Monkees
in "Sponge Bob Goes To the Gym"
Davy Jones' locker
  #10211  
Old 04-23-2018, 10:31 AM
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Davy Jones' locker
Has toothpaste, hair products and
the souls of the damned
  #10212  
Old 04-26-2018, 11:23 AM
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The souls of the damned
Get no mercy, they must watch
Full House marathons
  #10213  
Old 04-27-2018, 08:10 PM
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Full "House" marathons:
How many times will you hear,
"It's never Lupus"?
  #10214  
Old 04-30-2018, 11:33 PM
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It’s never Lupus
That got the girl on Mission
Impossible. Hmm.
  #10215  
Old 05-01-2018, 04:40 AM
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Impossible? Hmm...
Eat only one of the two
Peanut butter cups
  #10216  
Old 05-01-2018, 08:39 AM
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Peanut butter cups
Notably the mini ones
Are so very good
  #10217  
Old 05-01-2018, 08:42 AM
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Are so very good.
If you like peanut butter.
If you don't, they suck.
  #10218  
Old 05-03-2018, 12:17 AM
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If you don’t they suck
That is if you don’t die from
snake bite, friends will suck.
  #10219  
Old 05-03-2018, 02:10 PM
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snake bite, friends will suck
strangers will just let you die
'cept for yo mama
  #10220  
Old 05-04-2018, 11:30 PM
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‘cept for yo mama
I’ve been chaste for the last three
hundred and two days.
  #10221  
Old 05-05-2018, 07:38 AM
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hundred and two days
in a row that I have seen
Yo mama nekkid
  #10222  
Old 05-05-2018, 10:05 AM
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Yo mama nekkid
Please! Mother does get naked
But not ignorant!
  #10223  
Old 05-09-2018, 01:23 AM
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But not ignorant
so what is it that public
office attracts snakes?
  #10224  
Old 05-09-2018, 09:15 AM
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office attracts snakes?
The bank has a HISStory
Of hiring adders
  #10225  
Old 05-11-2018, 12:51 AM
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“Of Hiring Adders”
A book by Frank Osceola,
Chase Bank CFO.
  #10226  
Old 05-15-2018, 11:03 PM
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Chase Bank CFO.
Rakes moolah hand over fist.
Not a bad job, eh?
  #10227  
Old 05-16-2018, 09:08 AM
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Not a bad job, eh?
Drink beer and pet dogs all day
At least that's my dream
  #10228  
Old 05-16-2018, 09:11 AM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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At least that's my dream
that we'll have a new POTUS
in the White House soon
  #10229  
Old 05-17-2018, 01:16 PM
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in the White House soon
Buy nine Russian collusions
Get the tenth one free
  #10230  
Old 05-18-2018, 12:27 AM
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Get the tenth one free
The twelfth is what you pay for.
There’s always a catch.
  #10231  
Old 05-18-2018, 10:03 AM
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There’s always a catch
at the back of my throat when
Butch and Sundance die.
  #10232  
Old 05-19-2018, 08:58 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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Butch and Sundance die
Newman and Redford go on
Scoring with The Sting

Last edited by Annie-Xmas; 05-19-2018 at 08:58 AM.
  #10233  
Old 05-19-2018, 11:28 AM
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Scoring with "The Sting":
Good work by Marvin Hamlisch,
but he's annoying.
  #10234  
Old 05-19-2018, 08:15 PM
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"but he's annoying"
said John Wilkes Booth, of Lincoln,
"chomping that popcorn"
  #10235  
Old 05-20-2018, 11:22 PM
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Chomping that popcorn
I go crazy, like a pop
Corn eating machine
  #10236  
Old 05-21-2018, 04:38 AM
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Corn eating machine
Someone please invent this to
Take care of my feet
  #10237  
Old 05-21-2018, 02:26 PM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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"Take care of my feet,"
I told my podiatrist,
and he did, quite well
  #10238  
Old 05-22-2018, 08:40 AM
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and he did, quite well.
The Hunchback of Notre Dame
A great bell ringer.
  #10239  
Old 05-22-2018, 08:46 AM
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A great bell ringer?
As Anita Ward’s song goes,
You can ring my bell
  #10240  
Old 05-22-2018, 09:03 AM
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You can ring my bell
Oh please, I want you to play
With my dingaling
  #10241  
Old 05-22-2018, 11:49 AM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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With my dingaling
I can do all sorts of things
not all G-rated
  #10242  
Old 05-23-2018, 08:38 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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not all G-rated
That's true for some George Carlin
routines. And rap songs.
  #10243  
Old 05-23-2018, 09:43 AM
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routines and rap songs?
that's no party! where are
the hookers and blow?
  #10244  
Old 05-23-2018, 10:47 AM
Elendil's Heir Elendil's Heir is offline
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The hookers and blow
are what I just love about
this 'way cool website!
  #10245  
Old 05-23-2018, 10:34 PM
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This way cool website
Might talk about the finals:
the Knights and the Caps
  #10246  
Old 05-24-2018, 05:56 AM
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the knights and the caps
look nice, but I think helmets
are more practical
  #10247  
Old 05-24-2018, 06:05 AM
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Are more practical
the things we desire
or more beautiful
  #10248  
Old 05-24-2018, 08:24 AM
Annie-Xmas Annie-Xmas is offline
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or more beautiful
As the popular song goes
To me, yes indeed.
  #10249  
Old 05-24-2018, 09:06 AM
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To me, yes indeed
Jeff Bleich for Lieutenant Gov
In California


(that’s pronounced “Californ-ya”)
  #10250  
Old 05-24-2018, 10:44 AM
boson boson is offline
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In California
They pray for a rift to lift
Them out to the sea.
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