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Old 02-10-2020, 06:03 AM
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Passive Zombies


I'm just looking some opinions on something that randomly popped into my head the other day.

What would happen if the dead starting rising from the grave but it turned out that instead of craving brains, that they are just these passive zombies that don't chase anybody, don't hurt anybody, don't do anything but wander around aimlessly.

What would societies reaction be? Study them? Round them all up and burn them? Return each individual zombie to their families? Find some way to make use of them?
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Old 02-10-2020, 06:19 AM
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Study them to figure out what the hell is happening, them round them up and burn them.

Nobody wants to see their dead loved ones walking around. I mean, nobody wants to see anyone's dead loved ones walking around, but especially not their own.
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Old 02-10-2020, 07:15 AM
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Hook them up to giant hamster wheels for power? I mean, if they're openly, supernaturally, defying the laws of nature, might as well use it.
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Old 02-10-2020, 07:28 AM
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No science. We should shoot and burn them on principle alone.

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Old 02-10-2020, 07:49 AM
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Yeah, kill them with fire. I wouldn't want to get too passive with these things only to have some evil bastard pull an order 66 on their ass'.

Although a pet zombie would be kind of cool.
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Old 02-10-2020, 07:53 AM
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Sure, they're passive now but what about later?

Can you really trust a zombie?
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Old 02-10-2020, 08:15 AM
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Cremation would almost certainly become a national mandate within a very short time. However, before incinerating risen zombies out of hand, there would have to be a discussion and decision as to whether or not they are a new race of living creatures with the same right to live as, say, dogs or cats or deer or whatever.
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Old 02-10-2020, 08:43 AM
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Slavery. They cannot be trusted to roam free so its best to confine them, guard them and if possible use them for the betterment of society. In the future people can decide to be buried whole and join the zombie underclass or be creamated.
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Old 02-10-2020, 08:47 AM
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Slavery. They cannot be trusted to roam free so its best to confine them, guard them and if possible use them for the betterment of society. In the future people can decide to be buried whole and join the zombie underclass or be creamated.
If, as the OP has mandated, all they can do is "roam aimlessly" about, could you actually make slaves out of them since the whole purpose of slavery is to have a group of subjugated people perform specific and organized tasks? Seems to me it would be like trying to herd cats.
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Old 02-10-2020, 09:54 AM
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I already have to drive with care to avoid hitting deer. Imaging if the occasional zombie wandered in front of your care?
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Old 02-10-2020, 11:00 AM
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If, as the OP has mandated, all they can do is "roam aimlessly" about, could you actually make slaves out of them since the whole purpose of slavery is to have a group of subjugated people perform specific and organized tasks? Seems to me it would be like trying to herd cats.
Sure, the first thing that comes to mind is corral them with a single exit, the exit leads to a trough like an overshot water wheel. Zombie wanders aimlessly down the only available path then falls on the wheel driving it. Once at the bottom the zombies are given a single path back up to the top to repeat the process. As long as you have enough zombies their random wanderings will keep generating power.

You could tie the zombies to large objects you want moved and give them a limited path in the direction you want it moved it. Say pulling a stump out. Drive in with truck of zombies set up the course for 1000 zombies to amble 100 yards back to truck. Attach harnesses to stump and then attach zombies. Some will stand there and other will move randomly left and right but with a limited path the majority action will be down the course you just need to figure out what the average pulling power of a zombie, is maybe 20 pounds. So 1000 zombies at 50% efficiency gives you 5 tons of pull on an object at no cost. Sure its not faster that a backhoe but there is no fuel cost to operate.
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Old 02-10-2020, 11:06 AM
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Short term? Huge selfie competition.

Zombie spotting.
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Old 02-10-2020, 11:10 AM
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There's a sci-fi short story where they are used for menial jobs like waitstaff and delivery men. Can't remember what that specific story is called, but it's part of a huge collection of best sci-fi short stories from the last 50 years, many of which I had to read for a sci-fi film and lit class.

I loved that class...
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Old 02-10-2020, 11:27 AM
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Mel's Gun Range, now with moving life-like targets.
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Old 02-10-2020, 12:14 PM
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What would happen if the dead starting rising from the grave but it turned out that instead of craving brains, that they are just these passive zombies that don't chase anybody, don't hurt anybody, don't do anything but wander around aimlessly.
Sounds exactly like a trip to my local super-market.
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Old 02-10-2020, 12:55 PM
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Seriously they're not getting out of a coffin buried in a deep hole.

Ain't there a quarry around here somewhere?
()
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Old 02-10-2020, 01:38 PM
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There's a sci-fi short story where they are used for menial jobs like waitstaff and delivery men. Can't remember what that specific story is called, but it's part of a huge collection of best sci-fi short stories from the last 50 years, many of which I had to read for a sci-fi film and lit class.

I loved that class...
The old E-Man comic had one issue where the zombies were given jobs at the post office. No one noticed the change.
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Old 02-10-2020, 02:59 PM
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Never saw this BBC series but it expands on the zombies-in-society premise:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_the_Flesh_(TV_series)
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Old 02-10-2020, 03:07 PM
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I think we're all overlooking the fact that zombies, mindless and aimlessly wandering though they may be, will require energy for movement, which means that they are going to have to eat ............ SOMETHING.
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Old 02-10-2020, 06:10 PM
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I cannot deal with germs as it is. Zombies milling around produce or the underwear aisle at Wal-mart disturbs me. REALLY disturbs me.
Wal-Mart gives me the creeps, anyway.
Nope. Nope. Nope.

ETA: automatic doors, you know they're coming in. Just sayin'

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Old 02-10-2020, 06:36 PM
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I think we're all overlooking the fact that zombies, mindless and aimlessly wandering though they may be, will require energy for movement, which means that they are going to have to eat ............ SOMETHING.
Well, if they look like they're turning green, they could be mildly photosynthesizing. Stand still in the sun for a few days, shuffle for a few hours.
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Old 02-10-2020, 08:30 PM
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Slavery. They cannot be trusted to roam free so its best to confine them, guard them and if possible use them for the betterment of society. In the future people can decide to be buried whole and join the zombie underclass or be creamated.
(Bolding mine) That last part involves a large blender, doesn't it?
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Old 02-10-2020, 10:06 PM
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Their gender would have to be classified as LGBTQIAZ.

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Old 02-10-2020, 10:20 PM
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Old 02-11-2020, 03:33 AM
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Getting out of coffins is inherent to being a zombie, I assumed it as a given.

I'm surprised the first few answers were to burn them all, surely there is some way to exploit the zombies for the good or mankind? I should clarify though, I am talking about Romero style zombies which will probably disintegrate within a few months and that may limit the power generating capabilities. On the other hand, people are always dying, so there will always be fresh zombies for the turntables!

I could imagine huge processing centres being set up. Out front is a hospital/funeral parlour where the dead and dying are brought for all the proper rituals. In the middle a scrap yard where surgeons scout for useful limbs and organs, while out back grapes are squashed in huge numbers.

Really I am interested in the social implications. Just think, your recently departed family member is out there right now, wandering around a graveyard. How many people can really dismiss him/her as nothing more than a meatbag zombie? How many people would rather go and bring them home, especially if it was a kid? How many people will object to see these harmless "people" being herded up and burnt, how many protests by people who say zombies have feelings and equating zombies to cute little puppies?

Also, how much room will all these dead people take up?
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Old 02-11-2020, 10:12 AM
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...There's a sci-fi short story where they are used for menial jobs like waitstaff ...
So, you and I have been to the same restaurants?
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Old 02-11-2020, 11:11 AM
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I'm NOT eating at a joint where zombies are waitstaff. It's not like those hands are clean. Ewwwwww!
All that dead skin sloughing off. Nope.

Now if they want to employ them at the Sewer plant, that's fine.

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 02-11-2020 at 11:14 AM.
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Old 02-11-2020, 07:16 PM
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"After a general panic of indeterminate length things normalize and the pitchforks are put aside"


Has the deceased issue actually been repaired in some way to allow locomotion? Because that has very big ramifications, incalculable really. If instead its rotting romero zombies all the way down with no apparent logic or structural integrity (but walking around nonetheless) then I would basically assume the rapture is upon us and its just our luck that God has a sense of humor and is into genre subversion.
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Old 02-12-2020, 02:40 AM
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Check out Fido, my kind of zombie movies

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0457572/
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Old 02-12-2020, 02:55 AM
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Tape a smartphone to their hands, nobody will take any notice of them.
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Old 02-12-2020, 06:25 AM
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If they were passive, I don’t think people would be that okay with killing them.

Look at The Walking Dead, where they’re definitely not passive. Recall the character who refused to kill them because he held out hope that they could be “cured.”
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Old 02-12-2020, 09:05 AM
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Short term? Huge selfie competition.

Zombie spotting.
I think that a lot of people would be doing this even with regular, scary, zombies.
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Old 02-12-2020, 09:38 AM
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If they were passive, I don’t think people would be that okay with killing them.

Look at The Walking Dead, where they’re definitely not passive. Recall the character who refused to kill them because he held out hope that they could be “cured.”
The difference is that, unlike every single zombie narrative universe, we have pop culture knowledge about zombies and would use that to our advantage.

☣☣☣ The Rising Infected Walking Zombie Dying land of 1000 Corpses: 14 days after Event Alpha ☣☣☣
  • Suburbanite Wife: *Enters home* Hi, honey. Back from the store!
  • Zombie who slowly shuffling towards her: Uuuuuh.
  • SW: Strange thing happened to me, old man Peters tried to bite my neck. Odd eh? Guess he back off his meds...
  • Zombie: Uuuuuuuu....
  • SW: Oh and the store was strangely empty I dunno wha... *Zombie chomps her* Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

In our universe, the dead would never get to the point of critical mass to take down society. The military, police, private militia, lone armed randos would easily cure the walking dead back to their regular status of dead.

Last edited by orcenio; 02-12-2020 at 09:39 AM.
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Old 02-12-2020, 09:55 AM
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Society would probably not kill them because they're our former loved ones. That's one of the ways things got out of control in the original Dead movies. People hid and protected dead loved ones, and that helps the infection build and spread. There would be a lot of resistance to that, but the 'don't kill them' front would be there.

I would kill them immediately.

My mind goes back to The Day of the Triffids book. The triffids are already on earth, having come from a meteorite. They're dangerous, but are laregely managed and even available for purchase. Then the event happens, and there's no one to manage the triffids anymore. They take over the earth.

Looking at zombies walking around, all I would be thinking about is the same damn scenario happening. The dead aren't supposed to be walking about. They can easily become a huge problem should they go bitey.
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Old 02-12-2020, 01:51 PM
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Society would probably not kill them because they're our former loved ones. That's one of the ways things got out of control in the original Dead movies. People hid and protected dead loved ones, and that helps the infection build and spread. There would be a lot of resistance to that, but the 'don't kill them' front would be there.

I would kill them immediately.

My mind goes back to The Day of the Triffids book. The triffids are already on earth, having come from a meteorite. They're dangerous, but are laregely managed and even available for purchase. Then the event happens, and there's no one to manage the triffids anymore. They take over the earth.

Looking at zombies walking around, all I would be thinking about is the same damn scenario happening. The dead aren't supposed to be walking about. They can easily become a huge problem should they go bitey.
Yes, perhaps there's an extended latency phase, and then they go full Romero after everybody's let their guard down.
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Old 02-13-2020, 11:12 AM
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Short term? Huge selfie competition.

Zombie spotting.
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I think that a lot of people would be doing this even with regular, scary, zombies.
True, but those would be YouTube videos.
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Old 02-14-2020, 01:39 PM
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Passive zombies? Walk! Walk for your lives!!!!!!
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Old 02-15-2020, 05:42 PM
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Now I'm trying to remember which webcomic had adventurers running across a huge dire snail.
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Old 02-16-2020, 02:44 AM
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Passive zombies? Walk! Walk for your lives!!!!!!
Heinlein's time traveler from 1960 to 2000 in THE DOOR INTO SUMMER reads news of "zombie" drugs creating mindless slave laborers. IIRC a crew boss is quoted: "Them boys h'ain't drugged - they just STUPID!"

Late-phase capitalism will love zombie drugs and passive, uncomplaining workers. Fill the Amazon fulfillment centers with them! No complaints or strikes! Business is great!
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Old 02-17-2020, 09:41 PM
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Is zombie meat tasty?
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Old 02-18-2020, 12:01 AM
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Is zombie meat tasty?
Try some and see. We eagerly await your report.
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Old 02-18-2020, 04:39 PM
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Is zombie meat tasty?
If you dry the meat in strips, are they jerky?
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Old 02-18-2020, 05:12 PM
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Well, they were hardly smooth before.
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Old 02-18-2020, 07:46 PM
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At least we're not eating zombi SDMB threads.
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Old 02-19-2020, 01:39 PM
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What would societies reaction be? Study them? Round them all up and burn them? Return each individual zombie to their families? Find some way to make use of them?
I imagine even more people would opt for cremation over burial.

~Max
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Old 02-19-2020, 01:51 PM
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I'm just looking some opinions on something that randomly popped into my head the other day.

What would happen if the dead starting rising from the grave but it turned out that instead of craving brains, that they are just these passive zombies that don't chase anybody, don't hurt anybody, don't do anything but wander around aimlessly.

What would societies reaction be? Study them? Round them all up and burn them? Return each individual zombie to their families? Find some way to make use of them?
This was more or less the premise of the French drama series Les Revenants.
(let's not speak of the US remake)
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