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  #19151  
Old 05-09-2019, 12:22 AM
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If a tree falls in the forest, and Nobody is nearby, did anybody hear the tree fall?
  #19152  
Old 05-09-2019, 06:05 AM
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Excuse me, was that the sound of a tree falling?
  #19153  
Old 05-10-2019, 12:25 AM
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If I live in the city, would I be expected to hear a tree falling in the forest?
  #19154  
Old 05-10-2019, 12:57 AM
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Only if a bear is asleep in your bathtub. Is there a bear asleep in your bathtub?
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  #19155  
Old 05-10-2019, 01:31 AM
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Do I dare go and look?
  #19156  
Old 05-10-2019, 01:53 AM
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What have you got to lose?
  #19157  
Old 05-10-2019, 06:00 AM
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Do I dare disturb the universe?
  #19158  
Old 05-10-2019, 06:18 AM
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Do you live in a disturbed universe already?
  #19159  
Old 05-10-2019, 07:00 AM
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Where does one sign up to transfer universes?
  #19160  
Old 05-10-2019, 11:20 AM
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It can't be more complicated than transferring universities, can it?
  #19161  
Old 05-10-2019, 01:50 PM
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You went to some complicated universities, didn’t you?
  #19162  
Old 05-10-2019, 01:55 PM
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Trump University wasn't that complicated, was it?

Last edited by Covfefe; 05-10-2019 at 01:58 PM.
  #19163  
Old 05-10-2019, 02:00 PM
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I just went to the School of Hard Knocks- what, ya think yer better’n me, Mr. Fancypants University man?!
  #19164  
Old 05-10-2019, 02:08 PM
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Why can't I remember anything I learned at Trump U besides editing my submissions within a 5 minute time window trickery?
  #19165  
Old 05-11-2019, 01:47 AM
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nm

Last edited by Spoons; 05-11-2019 at 01:48 AM.
  #19166  
Old 05-12-2019, 03:09 PM
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What sort of question was that?
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  #19167  
Old 05-12-2019, 03:11 PM
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Is this a trick question?
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  #19168  
Old 05-12-2019, 03:13 PM
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Just because I'm magic, you think I'm a magician?
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  #19169  
Old 05-12-2019, 03:28 PM
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If you aren't a Magician, why do you wear that funny hat and cape?
  #19170  
Old 05-12-2019, 03:53 PM
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Will some people never understand haute couture?
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  #19171  
Old 05-12-2019, 04:27 PM
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Would you mix haute couture with haute cuisine?
  #19172  
Old 05-12-2019, 05:08 PM
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You mean like edible underwear?
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  #19173  
Old 05-12-2019, 09:40 PM
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Whose idea was that?
  #19174  
Old 05-13-2019, 12:13 AM
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Shouldn't that inventor receive the Nobel Peace Prize?
  #19175  
Old 05-13-2019, 03:21 AM
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How has edible underwear contributed to world peace?
  #19176  
Old 05-13-2019, 03:49 AM
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Well, if someone's wearing it, doesn't that mean that someone else will get a piece?
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  #19177  
Old 05-13-2019, 04:06 AM
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I don't know. Can somebody explain it?
  #19178  
Old 05-13-2019, 07:43 AM
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If somebody can explain that, can they explain the theory of relativity?
  #19179  
Old 05-13-2019, 08:38 AM
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Do you want the short version or the long version?
  #19180  
Old 05-13-2019, 11:19 AM
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Why is an elephant wearing your long underwear?
  #19181  
Old 05-13-2019, 05:53 PM
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Maybe he's asking if we want to see the short version or the long version of his elephant impression?
  #19182  
Old 05-14-2019, 12:15 AM
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Who else is thinking about, "Baby Elephant Walk" by Henry Mancini?
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  #19183  
Old 05-14-2019, 03:45 AM
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Should we be thinking about "Baby Elephant Walk?" Aren't there other songs to think about?
  #19184  
Old 05-14-2019, 07:19 AM
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Are you thinking of the “Pink Panther” theme?
  #19185  
Old 05-14-2019, 09:52 AM
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Did anyone ever hear that Glass Doctors ad jingle that touted the Pink Panther for some reason?
  #19186  
Old 05-14-2019, 03:31 PM
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Have you ever wondered why the Pink Panther was pink? Was he like an albino panther or something?
  #19187  
Old 05-14-2019, 03:40 PM
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Do you have a problem with albinos?
  #19188  
Old 05-14-2019, 05:32 PM
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Are those the people from Albinia?
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  #19189  
Old 05-14-2019, 10:09 PM
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Is Albinia located between Arminia and Rissia?
  #19190  
Old 05-14-2019, 10:39 PM
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Since when do Arminians have their own country?
  #19191  
Old 05-15-2019, 01:29 AM
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Pre or post independence from the Siviet Union?
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  #19192  
Old 05-15-2019, 03:56 AM
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Can’t you see on a Wikipedia map, Republic of. Armenia is right next to Russia (post Soviet Union)?
  #19193  
Old 05-15-2019, 03:58 AM
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Are you taking silly questions seriously?
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  #19194  
Old 05-15-2019, 04:03 AM
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So the followers of Jacobus Arminius do not have a country?
  #19195  
Old 05-15-2019, 08:27 AM
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Are you a Reformed Calvinist then?
  #19196  
Old 05-15-2019, 05:58 PM
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How many Reformed Calvinists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Is that yet to be determined?
  #19197  
Old 05-15-2019, 11:25 PM
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Why can't light bulbs change themselves?
  #19198  
Old 05-16-2019, 01:05 AM
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Maybe they lack the will?
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  #19199  
Old 05-16-2019, 02:01 AM
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And how can Reformed Calvinists get into the lightbulb in order to screw? Aren't lightbulbs pretty small?
  #19200  
Old 05-16-2019, 03:23 AM
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Is it possible you're thinking of orthodox light bulbs?
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