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  #1  
Old 02-15-2020, 10:59 AM
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Hell, no! - The anti-Bucket List.


There are lots of things that I donít want to do before I die. Obviously. For example, in my unenviable medical history, the only orifice that doctors have not yet shoved some sort of implement up is my nose, and Iíd like to keep it that way. It goes without saying that I want to avoid awful shit. Thatís not interesting at all.

But what about those traditional bucket-list items which crop up all the time? There are ďstandardĒ, well-known bucket-list items which I just donít get Ė they hold no appeal for me whatsoever. I can think of three right off the top of my head, things that Iíll happily die without having done. But for now, Iíll just tell you about one of them Ė swimming with dolphins. What the hell for? Why in the hell would I do that?

For a start I donít like swimming, particularly in the sea. But more important than that Ė who says the dolphins want to swim with me? Theyíre just going about their business, trying to catch something for tea, and some uninvited jackass turns up, splashing around, scaring the fish away and invading their personal space Ė and this is a good idea? Iíll tell you what, when I receive a written invitation from a dolphin, then Iíll think about getting my swimmies and waterwings out. Until that point, Iíll do the decent thing and leave the poor bastards alone.

So thatís definitely on my anti-Bucket List. Now, tell me whatís on yours - what have you got?

j
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:03 AM
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I have absolutely no desire to visit Israel or the "Holy Land."

I don't feel the need to jump out of a perfectly good airplane.

I'm not going on a cruise, at least not the popular kind with the giant boats.

I do have a lot of things I do want to do over the next ten years (before I'm too old) but that's not what this thread is about.
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:06 AM
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I think visiting an active volcano site is a great way to ruin a perfectly good opportunity for a nice hike elsewhere.
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:14 AM
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Hiking the mist trail to see Vernal Fall in Yosemite. Too steep too exposed too scared.
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:14 AM
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I don't feel the need to jump out of a perfectly good airplane.

I'm not going on a cruise, at least not the popular kind with the giant boats.
I agree with these, and I'll add.

I have no desire to spend a night sleeping on the ground in the open or in a tent with no plumbing available for ablutions.

I don't ever need to attend a picnic any moreómeals other than on-the-go snacks and beverages are best consumed indoors or adjacent to the indoors.
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:17 AM
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Skydiving.

Going on a cruise.

Going to Disney World.

Getting a tattoo.
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:18 AM
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I will not climb a mountain. Iíll drive to where I can see mountains but Iím not hiking up one.
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Old 02-15-2020, 11:21 AM
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One more...

I don't care how it's prepared, I'm never going to eat anything that is listed on the side of an insecticide spray bottle, or related phylum.
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Old 02-15-2020, 12:07 PM
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Traveling overseas. (I'm in the US.)

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of places I'd like to see. If I could just transport there, Star Trek-style, I'd be all over it. But the conventional way sounds like a logistical nightmare. What with the overreaction in airport security since 9/11, then being packed into an airplane like a sardine for 14 hours, then more fun at airports on arrival... Then having to go! go! go! nonstop for however long I'm there, trying to get everything in... And then another long, grueling airport/flying experience coming home... No thanks. It sounds like way more trouble and effort and frustration than it would be worth.
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Old 02-15-2020, 12:09 PM
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No cave diving. Probably no diving at all.

No swimming with wildlife. In fact, I prefer wildlife to not notice me.

No tattoo or piercings of anything other than my ears.
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Old 02-15-2020, 12:15 PM
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[...] in my unenviable medical history, the only orifice that doctors have not yet shoved some sort of implement up is my nose [...]
You have an orifice they still haven't shoved an implement up? I envy you.
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Old 02-15-2020, 12:15 PM
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I'll skydive only after the third engine fails. Not before.

A big fat No for piercings and tattoos. I've never seen one that added to the persons attractiveness or made them the slightest bit more interesting. I'm sure the same would be said of me.

I have zero interest in travelling to any part of Africa, South America or Asia. Europe and Australia are fine.
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Old 02-15-2020, 12:22 PM
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I ain't ridin' in no fuckin' helicopter!
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Old 02-15-2020, 12:49 PM
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Hmmm... Good question.

It's unlikely I will ever skydive, but who the hell knows.
No on scuba diving.
Definitely no swimming with the dolphins.
Not interested in a three-or-moresome.
No bungee jumping.
A tattoo is very unlikely, though I've never explicitly ruled it out. There's just nothing I could think of that I would want permanently tattooed on my body, but it's not inconceivable.
Definitely no piercings, though.
No desire to try any drugs stronger than pot (no interest in LSD or shrooms or anything like that, and definitely no interest in coke, heroin, meth, etc.)
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Old 02-15-2020, 12:52 PM
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Skydiving.
Swimming in the ocean.
Ziplining.
Traveling most places in the world. (I'm not adventurous. I like my amenities, comfy bed, and first-world hygiene standards.)
Going on a cruise (too many people, too many potential ways to get sick).
Trying drugs (vaguely interested in trying pot to see what it's like, and if LSD were legal I might give it a shot, but no)

Last edited by Infovore; 02-15-2020 at 12:52 PM.
  #16  
Old 02-15-2020, 01:16 PM
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Attend Mardi Gras in New Orleans. From what I saw on the show Cops it seems like little more than Drunken Idiot Fest.

Scuba diving doesn't interest me. I'm not sure why. I usually like collecting experiences, and I wouldn't say no to a skydive. I think the whole needing a tank to breathe thing puts me off.

Seeing the Mona Lisa. Beats me why a very average painting get all that attention.

Biking to Sturgis. Motorcycling killed my grandfather, and cost my brother a leg below the knee. Two different accidents, years apart. Not risking a third.

Anything involving religion. I've had quite enough, thank you.
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Old 02-15-2020, 01:25 PM
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- Going on a cruise, especially in or to a warm/hot location. Oh, the hell with it: going on a cruise...full stop.

- Scuba diving

- Attending a musical play

- Go to Las Vegas to do the typical "going to Vegas" BS ( casinos, shows )

- Going to The House of Blues

- Mountain climb. Oh I'll hike up/down/over anywhere, but non of this ropes, pitons and rappelling BS.

- Beach concerts
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Old 02-15-2020, 02:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Two Many Cats View Post

Seeing the Mona Lisa. Beats me why a very average painting get all that attention.
The museum itís in has one or two other paintings that are worth seeing. Couple of statues too. I wouldnít recommend going just for the Mona Lisa but when you are there for the rest you might as well check it out.
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Old 02-15-2020, 02:20 PM
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Traveling overseas. (I'm in the US.)

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of places I'd like to see. If I could just transport there, Star Trek-style, I'd be all over it. But the conventional way sounds like a logistical nightmare. What with the overreaction in airport security since 9/11, then being packed into an airplane like a sardine for 14 hours, then more fun at airports on arrival... Then having to go! go! go! nonstop for however long I'm there, trying to get everything in... And then another long, grueling airport/flying experience coming home... No thanks. It sounds like way more trouble and effort and frustration than it would be worth.
So you're going to remain in your own little hovel for the rest of your life, and not step out of your comfort zone and go see another country? How can you lead such a sheltered life? Part of the fun is getting out there and exploring other places, and meeting other people. I'm going to Taiwan and Japan in a few weeks and I can't wait to get there!

Save a few of your minor inconveniences, the world is your oyster. Open it up and you will find your pearl.
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Old 02-15-2020, 02:30 PM
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Originally Posted by GESancMan View Post
Traveling overseas. (I'm in the US.)

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of places I'd like to see. If I could just transport there, Star Trek-style, I'd be all over it. But the conventional way sounds like a logistical nightmare. What with the overreaction in airport security since 9/11, then being packed into an airplane like a sardine for 14 hours, then more fun at airports on arrival... Then having to go! go! go! nonstop for however long I'm there, trying to get everything in... And then another long, grueling airport/flying experience coming home... No thanks. It sounds like way more trouble and effort and frustration than it would be worth.
1. The difficulties of traveling overseas by air arenít as bad as you think it is.

2. Thereís no reason youíd have to ďgo go goĒ at your destination. I tend to take it quite easy

3. The world is an amazing place. Itís totally worth small logistical inconveniences.

4. Traveling changes you for the better. I have found that people who havenít traveled tend to have limited outlooks on the world and life.
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Old 02-15-2020, 02:37 PM
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There are plenty of things I have no particular interest in, or think they wouldn't be worth the cost. But things I'd turn down even if a bunch of friends were doing them, and they were paying my way? That's tougher.

Let's see... Drinking kupe luwak coffee, eating fugu, hiring a prostitute... Can't come up with much.
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Old 02-15-2020, 02:38 PM
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Absolutely nothing that involves jumping from a great height. I don't care if there is a bungee cord or a parachute or whatever. I don't trust it.

I also have no interest in ever visiting Las Vegas. Actually, I won a trip to Las Vegas and was not in the least disappointed about being unable to claim it (it was at a beer festival in Portland and they were assuming the winner would be someone who lived in the Pacific Northwest, which I don't). It's probably one of the few places that I'm not at least interested-in-enough-to-claim-a-free-trip.

I am all right with climbing smallish mountains, but I don't have any desire to climb a very big one.
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Old 02-15-2020, 02:43 PM
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Wow, a lot of people seem to be cribbing off my own anti-bucket list:

Quote:
Originally Posted by Procrustus View Post
I have absolutely no desire to visit Israel or the "Holy Land."

I don't feel the need to jump out of a perfectly good airplane.
An airplane falling apart is a different matter, though... although I'm trying to avoid those as well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Procrustus View Post
I'm not going on a cruise, at least not the popular kind with the giant boats.
Quote:
Originally Posted by QuickSilver View Post
I think visiting an active volcano site is a great way to ruin a perfectly good opportunity for a nice hike elsewhere.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crafter_Man View Post
Going to Disney World.

Getting a tattoo.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Die Capacitrix View Post
No cave diving. Probably no diving at all.

No swimming with wildlife. In fact, I prefer wildlife to not notice me.

No tattoo or piercings of anything other than my ears.
I'm not even getting my ears pierced, so there

Quote:
Originally Posted by pulykamell View Post
Not interested in a three-or-moresome.

No bungee jumping.

No desire to try any drugs stronger than pot (no interest in LSD or shrooms or anything like that, and definitely no interest in coke, heroin, meth, etc.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by dan39 View Post
So you're going to remain in your own little hovel for the rest of your life, and not step out of your comfort zone and go see another country? How can you lead such a sheltered life? Part of the fun is getting out there and exploring other places, and meeting other people. I'm going to Taiwan and Japan in a few weeks and I can't wait to get there!

Save a few of your minor inconveniences, the world is your oyster. Open it up and you will find your pearl.
Some of us have already done some traveling to other continents... it's not something I'd rule out, but I don't view it as a requirement, either, at this point.
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Old 02-15-2020, 02:45 PM
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I have no interest in doing anything physically risky.

No interest in social activities with weird rules, like no verbal communication allowed.

No interest in Participating in or witnessing sexual activities involving pain, sharp things, blood, bruising, or humiliation.

No interest in isolation chambers.

No interesting in camping out (worth repeating).

No tattoos, piercing, or other body modification.

No interest in removing or trimming my body hair except as medically necessary.
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Last edited by Acsenray; 02-15-2020 at 02:46 PM.
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Old 02-15-2020, 03:09 PM
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I will not climb a mountain, bungee jump, or jump out of an airplane.
I will not go again anywhere that requires a plane trip of more than 5 hours (unless someone stakes me to 1st class).
I will not visit Disneyland, or Vegas.
I will not attempt to visit any of the 17 US states or 3 Canadian territories I have not already visited.
I will not hike the Appalachian trail, although I almost wish I had done it younger.
  #26  
Old 02-15-2020, 04:53 PM
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So you're going to remain in your own little hovel for the rest of your life, and not step out of your comfort zone and go see another country? How can you lead such a sheltered life? Part of the fun is getting out there and exploring other places, and meeting other people. I'm going to Taiwan and Japan in a few weeks and I can't wait to get there!

Save a few of your minor inconveniences, the world is your oyster. Open it up and you will find your pearl.
North America is big enough, and has plenty enough to offer, that I can spend my entire life doing these things right here.
  #27  
Old 02-15-2020, 05:09 PM
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Another vote for skydiving, bungee jumping, or any other supposed "thrilling" activities related to heights or falling.

And the tattoos and piercings.
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Old 02-15-2020, 05:11 PM
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There are plenty of things I have no particular interest in, or think they wouldn't be worth the cost. But things I'd turn down even if a bunch of friends were doing them, and they were paying my way? That's tougher.
Yeah, I think this thread is for something stronger than just "have no particular interest in."

It's not just the things you don't want to do; it's the things you want to not do.
  #29  
Old 02-15-2020, 05:18 PM
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No body modification that's not medically necessary.

No parachuting not related to catastrophic aircraft failure. Same for flying suits.

No shipwreck diving. Damn things are spooky.

No cow tipping. Seems rude, and belligerent bovines are not my animals of choice.

No dance marathons.

No eating contests. Especially smelt eating contests.

I will not be visiting North Korea. Nor North Sentinel island.

No cloning my pets.
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Old 02-15-2020, 05:25 PM
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Well, visiting Wuhan, China is now off my list...
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Old 02-15-2020, 05:46 PM
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Times Square, New Year's Eve.
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Old 02-15-2020, 05:46 PM
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I’ve gone sky diving three times. It felt like flying.

Would I do it again? Hell, no! That’s fucking dangerous!

And another “oh hell no” to bungee jumping. That never appealed to me, or my back.

Last edited by Moriarty; 02-15-2020 at 05:46 PM.
  #33  
Old 02-15-2020, 06:34 PM
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Skydiving.

Going on a cruise.

Going to Disney World.

Getting a tattoo.
Preach it.

I'll add:

Climbing any mountain.
Zip lining.
No swimming of any sort.

I've traveled enough in my life and at age 72 have no desire to now get on a plane that leaves the U.S. boundaries. Too long and too uncomfortable. We've made a few trips to the east coast, and that's about as far as I want to go, even in first class. My wife really, really, really wants to go to India, which I'm fine with. . .for her, not for me. Find a friend and go, already. Of all the places in all the world that I would endure the misery of that long a trip for, India is pretty much dead last.
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Old 02-15-2020, 07:53 PM
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My brother did enough sky diving for both of us. I went up with him on the plane, but came down on the plane. That's close enough for me.

I have no desire to go into the interior of China. I've been to Hong Kong and Macao, close enough. Ditto for Vietnam. I avoided the place during the late unpleasantness, want to keep avoiding it.

No desire to go skiing. No desire to get a tattoo. No desire to use any drugs. No desire to own a gun. I've shot them, but who wants one?

And cruises are not bad if you go to interesting places.
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Old 02-15-2020, 07:55 PM
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No body modification that's not medically necessary.

No parachuting not related to catastrophic aircraft failure. Same for flying suits.

No shipwreck diving. Damn things are spooky.

No cow tipping. Seems rude, and belligerent bovines are not my animals of choice.

No dance marathons.

No eating contests. Especially smelt eating contests.

I will not be visiting North Korea. Nor North Sentinel island.

No cloning my pets.
Now Iím all hungry for smelts.
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Old 02-15-2020, 07:55 PM
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Traveling overseas. (I'm in the US.)

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of places I'd like to see. If I could just transport there, Star Trek-style, I'd be all over it. But the conventional way sounds like a logistical nightmare. What with the overreaction in airport security since 9/11, then being packed into an airplane like a sardine for 14 hours, then more fun at airports on arrival... Then having to go! go! go! nonstop for however long I'm there, trying to get everything in... And then another long, grueling airport/flying experience coming home... No thanks. It sounds like way more trouble and effort and frustration than it would be worth.
Shell out for business class and you'll be fine. Went that way to Hong Kong, and I had plenty of room. Start by going to England where they speak the language, more or less. Low stress.
Course I'm from New York so I thought Hong Kong was great if a little empty.
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Old 02-15-2020, 08:00 PM
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North America is big enough, and has plenty enough to offer, that I can spend my entire life doing these things right here.
North America is only geographically large. Culturally itís relatively uniform.
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Old 02-15-2020, 08:23 PM
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No piercings, tattoos or other body modifications that aren't medically necessary.
No travel to Africa, South or Central America, Mexico, the Middle East, India or China. Heck, include no Asia at all.
No mountain climbing. With my current body, not likely to climb anything, actually.
I've been on one cruise. That was enough.
Ditto to others who've mentioned Las Vegas.
  #39  
Old 02-15-2020, 08:54 PM
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And cruises are not bad if you go to interesting places.
I've gotten to go on two National Geographic Cruises--to Baja California and to Antarctica--and they were flippin' amazing. So yeah, the standard cruise experience doesn't sound great, but some cruises can be sweet.

As for me, I love needles the way dogs love fireworks. So tattoos are right out, and I'm not really searching for alternative ways to get heroin on my bucket list.
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Old 02-15-2020, 09:03 PM
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Even though I would have no problem with skydiving, there's no way I would go bungee jumping. I guess I trust the laws of aerodynamics more than the laws of elasticity.
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Old 02-15-2020, 09:36 PM
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Let's see... Drinking kupe luwak coffee, eating fugu, hiring a prostitute... Can't come up with much.
So that's pretty much - sex, drugs & sushi roll.
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Old 02-15-2020, 09:51 PM
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When people start talking about their bucket lists, it often has a "desperate midlife crisis" feel to it. As if they believe that they're running out of time and they need to do one dangerous thing; two adventurous things; visit a European, a South American, and an Asian landmark; and try an extreme sport.

That was me. But as I get older, I'm much more content with what I've got. And where I've been. My testosterone-fueled extreme adventures seem unnecessary now.


I think that's where my shortened Bucket List (or even an Anti-Bucket List) might be coming from.
  #43  
Old 02-15-2020, 10:12 PM
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Attend Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
Me neither. I also have no desire to go to Times Square on New Year's Eve, Burning Man, or take a Caribbean cruise. Now, an Alaskan cruise? That, I might be willing to do.
  #44  
Old 02-15-2020, 10:46 PM
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My anti-bucket list includes bungee jumping, rock climbing, mountain climbing, biking across Russia a/o Africa, swimming with dolphins, petting a ray (why? why?!), eating tongue, eating brains, and hunting. I guess, also, being admitted to a hospital or visiting Auschwitz.

OTOH, I am enjoying thinking about where I'd like to travel before my knees go--Montserrat? Rapa Nui? Lithuania? 2-week Cuban birding tour?
  #45  
Old 02-15-2020, 11:00 PM
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Interesting thread idea -- kudos to the OP.

Some of these posts put me in a Dr Suess mind:

I will not climb or bungee jump
The Appalachians are for chumps
Disneyland I not will plan
I will not Bucket, Sam I Am!


For me, I won't do anything claustrophobic. Caving, that sort of thing.

Last edited by squeegee; 02-15-2020 at 11:02 PM.
  #46  
Old 02-15-2020, 11:19 PM
Senegoid is offline
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One of my life-long ambitions is to never visit New York.

Interesting to note how much overlap there is in so many of the above posts. My own list could include many of the same. I'm mention piercings and tattoos in particular, among others.

But some unsolicited comments too, FWTW:

Swimming with dolphins: Actually, Treppenwitz, if you just go swimming around wild dolphins, they will almost always avoid people and stay away. If they want to approach you, as they rarely but occasionally do, they will. This may not be such a happy thing as it may seem: Dolphins are highly social, and I've seen it speculated that wild dolphins that hang out with people may be social outcasts from their own tribe, seeking human company in their desperate loneliness. Sad, if true.

Tame captive dolphins are a different thing. They are generally friendly and playful, much like dogs, and fun to be around. I worked on a dolphin research project. Others swam with them every weekend, but I only waded during low-water on tank cleaning days. We all played with them a lot from tank side. They loved playing with volleyballs, frisbees, and garden hoses among other toys.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Procrustus View Post
I don't feel the need to jump out of a perfectly good airplane.
Skydiving: I've dabbled with the thought, but that's all. I did have a reasonable "need" to jump out of a perfectly good airplane though: Most glider pilots including students wear parachutes (in my club, it's club policy). One would suppose it would be helpful, y'know, if we actually got some experience using them. (All we got was a 10-minute lecture on how to bail out and use the chute.) I personally know a pilot who is alive today because he wore a parachute and used it once. I also knew two pilots who aren't alive today because they didn't or couldn't bail out when they needed to.

Quote:
Originally Posted by silenus View Post
I'll skydive only after the third engine fails. Not before.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Broomstick View Post
An airplane falling apart is a different matter, though... although I'm trying to avoid those as well.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Qadgop the Mercotan View Post
No parachuting not related to catastrophic aircraft failure. Same for flying suits.
True stories: At the skydive business where I was flying gliders, they had the jump plane break apart at altitude. The pilot had somehow overstressed the plane and major parts just broke off. The skydivers all managed to scramble out and landed safely. The pilot wasn't wearing a chute. But somehow, miraculously, he managed to land the plane without breaking it into too many more pieces than it already was.

A few years later (just last year I think), that same plane ended up flying skydivers in Hawaii, where it crashed and burned, killing everyone.

And those wing suit jumpers are CRAZY! Look up some YouTube videos and see for yourself!

Camping: Didn't care much for it. Did a few times as a teen with an organized group. Not again until just in the last few years, when I camped several times at airports as part of sailplane activities. Kinda okay at best, but I was just in it for the gliders. (Lotsa cool pics at those links. And yeah, one of the people in those pics is me.)

Implement up that orifice: I've had a scope stuck up my nose. No sweat, it turned out. No anesthetic, no sedation needed. It wasn't particularly unpleasant at all, surprisingly. When they couldn't get a tube down my mouth due to gagging, they stuck it up my nose instead, which apparently bypasses the gag point. Don't worry about it. But I sure don't ever want a tube stuck up my you-know-what other orifice. (They don't use sedation for that? )

Okay, just my un-edited ramblings while I'm still de-compressing from that weird MSG thread.
  #47  
Old 02-16-2020, 02:45 AM
Periwinkle is online now
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I don’t want to meet any celebrities. No sportsball people, no actors, no musicians, etc. if I run across one I will most likely politely pretend not to notice. Except maybe the Dog Whisperer, I would probably show him a picture of my puppy. And Barack and Michelle Obama, I would be excited to see them.

I don’t want to go on a safari. Or anyplace hot, I get too cranky.
  #48  
Old 02-16-2020, 09:35 AM
mbh is offline
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I've had colonoscopies, catheters, esophageal endoscopy, doctors examining my eardrums, and a feeding tube in my nose. One of my nostrils is still a virgin, but I don't remember which one.

I have had one tattoo in my life. The doctors marked a tumor, which was later surgically removed. Not going to get inked voluntarily. All else equal, I think people look better when they are unmutilated.

I would like to visit every brothel in Nevada, and get a souvenir coffee cup from each one. I'm not really interested in paying for the usual services, though.

I wouldn't mind swimming with dolphins, but I don't want to swim with sharks. Yes I know that the probability of being bitten is very low. Not low enough.

I prefer to abstain from intoxicating substances. Addiction is . . . undignified.
  #49  
Old 02-16-2020, 10:09 AM
dalej42 is offline
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There’s probably lots of countries I won’t get to as I believe in getting to really a place rather than ticking off a checklist. I’m almost certain I won’t get to any developing countries as I need my creature comforts. I probably should have when I was younger. Unless something changes, I won’t go to the Middle East because of their human rights records and please don’t hijack the thread to tell me how bad the USA is.

I highly doubt I’ll do a typical cruise. The idea of having my bags searched for alcohol reminds me of high school and I really have no desire to eat all day. Shore excursions are too brief and you’re often at the mercy of tacky souvenir sellers and tour guides. And quite frankly, I don’t need to see 50 year old office workers drunk and doing the electric slide. Reminds me of going to the office Christmas party.
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  #50  
Old 02-16-2020, 10:17 AM
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Extreme zip lining at the Ark Encounter.

What would Jesus do?
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