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  #201  
Old 08-08-2016, 09:45 AM
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Annie-Xmas was born in a popcorn mine in East Slobovakia during a blizzard during an eclipse of the moon on the Night of a Thousand Iguanas.
  #202  
Old 08-08-2016, 09:48 AM
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Prof. Pepperwinkle likes to wear his thong at the beach. Unfortunately, he wears it backwards.
  #203  
Old 08-08-2016, 11:37 AM
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Intergalactic Gladiator is neither a gladiator nor intergalactic. His name should be Agoraphobic Numismatist.
  #204  
Old 08-08-2016, 12:11 PM
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davidm had to cut and paste the words "Agoraphobic Numismatist" here, because his spelling is simply atrocious.
  #205  
Old 08-08-2016, 12:48 PM
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Elendil's Heir misspelled his name when he joined the board. He was trying to type Elendil's Butthole .
  #206  
Old 08-08-2016, 01:38 PM
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davidm holds the Guinness world record for dangling a cinder block on a chain connected to his nipples at 8 days, 20 hours, and 36 minutes.
  #207  
Old 08-08-2016, 02:10 PM
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Intergalactic Gladiator joined Gladiator school hoping to meet hot guys
  #208  
Old 08-08-2016, 04:25 PM
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Whiskey Dickens is a Labrador Retriever with a penchant for Wild Turkey...

Last edited by John DiFool; 08-08-2016 at 04:26 PM.
  #209  
Old 08-08-2016, 04:36 PM
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John DiFool is actually two fools (di-fool, get it?) who were born attached at the nose.
  #210  
Old 08-08-2016, 05:35 PM
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davidm is the only American man who has never downloaded any pornography. He does, however, know all the lyrics to Avenue Q's The Internet is for Porn
  #211  
Old 08-08-2016, 05:48 PM
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The top three words that make Annie-Xmas giggle uncontrollably: basilisk, nipple, sesquipedalian.
  #212  
Old 08-08-2016, 05:58 PM
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Intergalactic Gladiator is the secret love-child of Nancy Reagan and Captain Kangaroo.
  #213  
Old 08-09-2016, 12:35 AM
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Slow Moving Vehicle moves slowly for absolutely no known reason.
  #214  
Old 08-09-2016, 04:39 AM
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Princhester was present at the shooting of JFK, wearing his favorite "grassy knoll" outfit. He didn't get a good view of the shooting, however, because some guy with a rifle was standing on him at the time.
  #215  
Old 08-09-2016, 06:07 AM
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Gyrate was the gunman on the grassy knoll.
  #216  
Old 08-09-2016, 07:54 AM
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davidm is the punman on the gassy knoll.
  #217  
Old 08-09-2016, 08:05 AM
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Intergalactic Gladiator made his movie debut as an extra in the infamous "Spartacus" scene that as cut out of the movie.
  #218  
Old 08-09-2016, 10:00 AM
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Annie-Xmas is a closet Vermin Supreme supporter.
  #219  
Old 08-09-2016, 10:05 AM
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davidm has a photograph of himself standing with a cup of coffee and a cigarette, and when people come to his house, he stands in front of the photo in the exact same pose like that one shot in Airplane to see if they notice.
  #220  
Old 08-09-2016, 07:03 PM
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Nonsuch cannot be defined, labeled, categorized, accounted for, found, pinned down, folded, spindled, or mutilated.
  #221  
Old 08-10-2016, 08:12 AM
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John DiFool was born in a bathroom on April 1st.
  #222  
Old 08-10-2016, 09:47 AM
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Annie-Xmas is deep, deep, deep undercover for Hydra and has strict orders to not contact them for any reason.

At least that's what they said to her at the last meeting.
  #223  
Old 08-10-2016, 10:12 AM
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Intergalactic Gladiator was slated to compete with the Matltan Olympic curling team, but alas, a near fatal belly button injury took him out of the competition.
  #224  
Old 08-10-2016, 12:12 PM
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janis_and_c0 was born as Society's Child (Or so her parents had Been Thinking), but, as she grew up, Insanity Came Quietly to her Structured Mind. When The Man You Are in Me showed up (When the Party was Over At Seventeen) In the Winter, she Really Tied One On.

She Would have Liked to Dance, but all she got were some Roses, and that is because, as we all know, Love Is Blind.

But when she was Between the Lines, and asked her beau, "Will You Dance?", that was when That Grand Illusion came and entered her head, causing her to Fly Too High, alas.

Her wedding vows were "You Are Love, you are The Other Side of the Sun."

That night, Under the Covers, it was Every Woman's Song come true.
  #225  
Old 08-10-2016, 12:19 PM
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John DiFool spends day after day alone on a hill with a foolish grin stilling perfectly still and he never gives an answer, but sees the sun going down and eyes in his head see the world spinning around.
  #226  
Old 08-10-2016, 12:48 PM
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All things being equal, Annie-Xmas actually kinda prefers Easter.
  #227  
Old 08-12-2016, 09:53 AM
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Nonsuch shaves with a cheese grater.
  #228  
Old 08-12-2016, 09:59 AM
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Intergalactic Gladiator shaves with Nonsuch's cheese grater
  #229  
Old 08-12-2016, 09:43 PM
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Frodo is trying desperately to get rid of an earring.
  #230  
Old 08-12-2016, 09:49 PM
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Slow Moving Vehicle's role model in life is the prostitute to whom Van Gogh gave his ear. His ultimate fantasy is be given the same.
  #231  
Old 08-12-2016, 10:27 PM
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Princhester has a tattoo of a nude Cecil Adam's on his left butt cheek.
  #232  
Old 08-12-2016, 10:34 PM
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davidm doesn't understand that this thread is supposed to comprise fabricated rumours, not true statements.
  #233  
Old 08-12-2016, 10:41 PM
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Princhester believes with every fiber of his being that turnabout is not fair play, and has written a tedious, unreadable, extensively-footnoted, 350-page monograph to prove it.
  #234  
Old 08-12-2016, 10:50 PM
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Elendil's Heir has dedicated his life to proving the existence of small invisible beings called "Elendil's Creepers".
  #235  
Old 08-13-2016, 10:40 AM
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davidm paid Michael Angelo to make a full size sculpture of him a la Michelangelo's David.

Unfortunately, Michael Angelo was no Michelango.

Last edited by Annie-Xmas; 08-13-2016 at 10:41 AM.
  #236  
Old 08-13-2016, 10:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Slow Moving Vehicle View Post
Frodo is trying desperately to get rid of an earring.
Now I'll lose an ear too!!?
This is too much.
  #237  
Old 08-13-2016, 11:59 AM
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Frodo has a longstanding, unreasoning and nearly overpowering fear of losing parts of his body.
  #238  
Old 08-13-2016, 01:14 PM
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Elendil's Heir's detachable tongue creeps Frodo the hell out.
  #239  
Old 08-13-2016, 01:49 PM
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Slow Moving Vehicle runs self improvement seminars titled "How to Get Rich by Giving Seminars on How to Get Rich".
  #240  
Old 08-13-2016, 01:49 PM
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Davidm once fought a guy named Goliathm, who wasn't so big after all.

Last edited by panache45; 08-13-2016 at 01:50 PM.
  #241  
Old 08-13-2016, 01:49 PM
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davidm paid Michael Angelo to make a full size sculpture of him a la Michelangelo's David.

Unfortunately, Michael Angelo was no Michelangelo.

ETA: What am I, invisible?

Last edited by Annie-Xmas; 08-13-2016 at 01:50 PM.
  #242  
Old 08-13-2016, 02:02 PM
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Annie-Xmas suffers from palilalia.
  #243  
Old 08-13-2016, 09:12 PM
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davim enjoys playing croquet in lime green polyester leisure suits whilst sipping Frangelico from Annie-Xmas' slippers.
  #244  
Old 08-13-2016, 09:28 PM
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To slightly askew, the Leaning Tower of Pisa is perfectly vertical.
  #245  
Old 08-13-2016, 09:35 PM
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Walken After Midnight doesn't actually know if he becomes Walken after midnight because he's never been fed after midnight.
  #246  
Old 08-13-2016, 10:22 PM
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Princhester knows what a princh is, and will, upon request and the payment of $2500 cash, draw, engrave or paint a workmanlike portrait of one.
  #247  
Old 08-13-2016, 10:29 PM
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Elendil's Heir inherited--from Elendil senior--all the goddam money in the world and can afford princh portraits. Unlike the rest of us who have to steal them.
  #248  
Old 08-14-2016, 12:48 AM
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That TV interview where Burpo became famous ("the world's amazing talking dog"): it was a fake--just a ventriloquism act.
  #249  
Old 08-14-2016, 02:16 PM
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With intensive therapy, a good diet, the loving support of family and a favorable electoral outcome on November 8, PastTense hopes to be able to change his or her username to FutureRelaxed.
  #250  
Old 08-14-2016, 04:01 PM
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Elendil's Heir is actually Ellen Dill's hare, a sentient dust bunny from under the den couch.
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