Straight Dope Message Board

[Mike Mabes]

I've read these boards from time to time over the years. Forgot about The Dope until recently. Don't know what reminded me of all the great discussions that happen here, I have been browising for about a month. My brother in law once said, "If you can think of it, someone else already has." That was in the contex of "inventing" things. I've "invented" a lot of things over the years, but they already had them (what movie was that from, I know some of you know). Well, on this forum, regarding all the topics being discussed, before I can even post something to make my point, someone else has already done so, better than I can.

So I will probably most be an observer. Maybe I can contribute a thought or two.

So why am I in the pit? Because fuck Trump, fuck the facist Republicans, fuck the idiots who think socialism and communism are the same thing, that socialism leads to totalitarism, hell fuck the idiots who think we don't already practice socialism in this country. Get a fucking clue from the "entitlement" program Social Security.

I just got into a Facebook debate with an idiot, a friend of my brother in law, who thoght socialism meant...well fuck the details. I swore I would never do it again. This is the second time I have made that vow. What was the Mark Twain quote about arguing with an idiot?

Well, here, there are some idiots, sure. But there are so many here who destroy their idiot arguments with logic and (not alternative) facts.

So here's to all of you people fighting ignorance.

[Sunny Daze]

Welcome!

You can swear at those folks all you want in the forums. You just can't swear at a poster unless you're in here. No swearing at mods.

[iiandyiiii]

Welcome to the Dope!

[Snowboarder Bo]

Hey! Fuckin' welcome to the fucking Dope, Mike! Fuck!

[bobot]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

...
So here's to all of you people fighting ignorance.

And sometimes not even that. Sometimes, just saying:"Man, fuck you Trump, you lying fucking jackass!"
Welcome.

[asahi]

I declare this the best first post of all time. It reminds me of when rookies get called up to the majors and get a home run on their first at-bat - well done.

[Locrian]

Originally Posted by asahi

I declare this the best first post of all time. It reminds me of when rookies get called up to the majors and get a home run on their first at-bat - well done.

He kinda sounds like you! And, er... well, the rest of us at times.

[Mr Shine]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

I've read these boards from time to time over the years. Forgot about The Dope until recently. Don't know what reminded me of all the great discussions that happen here, I have been browising for about a month. My brother in law once said, "If you can think of it, someone else already has." That was in the contex of "inventing" things. I've "invented" a lot of things over the years, but they already had them (what movie was that from, I know some of you know). Well, on this forum, regarding all the topics being discussed, before I can even post something to make my point, someone else has already done so, better than I can.

So I will probably most be an observer. Maybe I can contribute a thought or two.

So why am I in the pit? Because fuck Trump, fuck the facist Republicans, fuck the idiots who think socialism and communism are the same thing, that socialism leads to totalitarism, hell fuck the idiots who think we don't already practice socialism in this country. Get a fucking clue from the "entitlement" program Social Security.

I just got into a Facebook debate with an idiot, a friend of my brother in law, who thoght socialism meant...well fuck the details. I swore I would never do it again. This is the second time I have made that vow. What was the Mark Twain quote about arguing with an idiot?

Well, here, there are some idiots, sure. But there are so many here who destroy their idiot arguments with logic and (not alternative) facts.

So here's to all of you people fighting ignorance.

At last, someone on these boards has the guts to pit Trump. I never thought it would happen.

[Vinyl Turnip]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

What was the Mark Twain quote about arguing with an idiot?

"The coldest argument I ever spent was with an idiot in San Francisco."

[Two Many Cats]

Don't worry about posting stuff somebody else already talked about. Unless it's a double post with another poster about somebody famous dying, you do fine. Just go to Cafe Society and talk about food. Those threads are guaranteed a big response.

[bucketybuck]

Be careful OP, if you only post in the Pit then that is considered trolling and you will be banned.

[kayaker]

Fucken hey.

[andros]

Originally Posted by bucketybuck

Be careful OP, if you only post in the Pit then that is considered trolling and you will be banned.

That's...not entirely accurate.
.

[snowthx]

So far, so good. Welcome mat rolled out. However...

1. Hot dogs. Mustard or ketchup?
2. Toilet paper. Over or under?

Answer carefully.

[Shodan]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

What was the Mark Twain quote about arguing with an idiot?

Perhaps it's this one -

Originally Posted by Mark Twain

'Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.'

Thanks for the heads up though - certainly something to keep in mind when reading your posts.

Regards,
Shodan

[JKellyMap]

Originally Posted by Vinyl Turnip

"The coldest argument I ever spent was with an idiot in San Francisco."

[don't ask]

I'm just surprised there wasn't already a Mike Mabes Pit thread.

[Omar Little]

Originally Posted by Mr Shine

At last, someone on these boards has the guts to pit Trump. I never thought it would happen.

Me either, the OP is full of originality, especially for the Pit.

[Beckdawrek]

Well, looky here.

[Mike Mabes]

Originally Posted by snowthx

So far, so good. Welcome mat rolled out. However...

1. Hot dogs. Mustard or ketchup?
2. Toilet paper. Over or under?

Answer carefully.

1. Ketchup is wrong. But if you also put mustard on I wouldn't make you leave my table
2. Under makes no sense at all.

[icantdraw]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

1. Ketchup is wrong. But if you also put mustard on I wouldn't make you leave my table
2. Under makes no sense at all.

WRONG!!! (asshole*)

Under means that the cat can't unroll the roll on to the floor.

And I don't even have a cat and I do it for that reason.


* You probably aren't, but this is the pit after all....

[bobot]

I, too, never understood why anyone would roll their toilet paper from the under. But then some Doper let me know about the cat thing. The things I've learned here, but never applied in my life measure in some number. Or quantity, or whatever.

[Mike Mabes]

I've always had cats and they've never done it so I didn't know. They have occasionally gotten into the paper towels

[SpoilerVirgin]

Originally Posted by Vinyl Turnip

"The coldest argument I ever spent was with an idiot in San Francisco."

Now I wish I didn't hate signatures, because that would be mine.

[Beckdawrek]

Originally Posted by bobot

I, too, never understood why anyone would roll their toilet paper from the under. But then some Doper let me know about the cat thing. The things I've learned here, but never applied in my life measure in some number. Or quantity, or whatever.

I never could make a decision on the toilet paper thingy, so I have a stand that holds 3 rolls stacked up. Simplify, folks, simplify.
The real question for the OP is, "Can you make it* better and cheaper at home?"

*anything.

[Baal Houtham]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

2. Under makes no sense at all.

Pay attention, because this is ultimate truth and will fly quickly from the mind. In a Perfect World, Under is superior. It is simply more streamlined and attractive. Beauty is Truth. An Over roll crowned with a flappy piece of flimsy, irregularly torn paper is ugly.

But we do not exist in a perfect world. In almost every case, some design flaw will make Under impractical. The mounting will be too low to see or reach. The mounting will be too tight and prevent easy spinning of a new roll. The mounting will be too close to a wall and condensed moisture will leach onto the roll.

But when the stars align, do not allow a lifetime of coping with a corrupt, jerry-rigged world cause you to reject the Kingdom of God.

[xenophon41]

Originally Posted by Beckdawrek

I never could make a decision on the toilet paper thingy, so I have a stand that holds 3 rolls stacked up.

Ah, clever!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Um... left, or right?




_{by the way, "under" doesn't actually stop a cat}

[Beckdawrek]

Originally Posted by xenophon41

Ah, clever!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Um... left, or right?


_{by the way, "under" doesn't actually stop a cat}

However it lands in the stack. I like a little excitement in my life.
Nothing will stop a cat on a mission to tear paper.

[Monty]

Originally Posted by Beckdawrek

However it lands in the stack. I like a little excitement in my life.
Nothing will stop a cat on a mission to tear paper.

You guys don't know the best way to prevent a cat from tearing up the toilet paper. The answer is really quite simple: Don't use toilet paper.

Or, as I do, don't have a cat. Apartment living overseas limits choice of pets.

[JohnT]

Originally Posted by Beckdawrek

I never could make a decision on the toilet paper thingy, so I have a stand that holds 3 rolls stacked up. Simplify, folks, simplify.
The real question for the OP is, "Can you make it* better and cheaper at home?"

*anything.

All you've done is change the debate from top/bottom to left/right.

Eta: Dammit, Xenophon41. I mean... really? You just had to pre-steal my joke, dintcha?

[74westy]

Originally Posted by Monty

You guys don't know the best way to prevent a cat from tearing up the toilet paper. The answer is really quite simple: Don't use toilet paper.

Or, as I do, don't have a cat. Apartment living overseas limits choice of pets.

The best way to prevent a cat from tearing up toilet paper is to have it declawed.

[Jumpbass]

Use the cat as toilet paper. That'll show it.

[EddyTeddyFreddy]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

I've always had cats and they've never done it so I didn't know. They have occasionally gotten into the paper towels

Cats? Aha! Time for that other tried and true argument starter:

Declaw or not?

*dons fire-retardant suit; flees*



Damn; ninja'd by 74Westy!

[Monty]

Originally Posted by 74westy

The best way to prevent a cat from tearing up toilet paper is to have it declawed.

Yeah, but isn't that cruel to the cat? Do veterinarians still do declawing?

[Beckdawrek]

We could all just close the bathroom door.

[pulykamell]

Originally Posted by bobot

I, too, never understood why anyone would roll their toilet paper from the under. But then some Doper let me know about the cat thing. The things I've learned here, but never applied in my life measure in some number. Or quantity, or whatever.

For the life of me, I never really understood that people even paid attention to this until the Dope and social media. If you asked me, I wouldn't have a clue which way I put the toilet paper roll on the spool. Basically, I just throw it on the spool, try to find where the little perforation/separation is, and whichever way it happens to hang, that's the way it hangs. Just for fun, I checked, and two of the bathrooms have it under; one has it over. But I had to check, as I hadn't the faintest clue. Over two decades of adulthood and it's never occurred to me that this is important or in any way affects utility.

[bobot]

The litmus test for the over/under issue to determine how seriously someone takes it is the question: Have you ever inverted the roll in someone else's house because you felt that they were doing it wrong.

[Beckdawrek]

Originally Posted by bobot

The litmus test for the over/under issue to determine how seriously someone takes it is the question: Have you ever inverted the roll in someone else's house because you felt that they were doing it wrong.

OMG, my sister used to do that! Seriously anal. I'm not crazy, (well yeah I am) but not about toilet paper hanging.
So what are thoughts on the paper towel roll, OP?

[Mike Mabes]

Originally Posted by Beckdawrek

OMG, my sister used to do that! Seriously anal. I'm not crazy, (well yeah I am) but not about toilet paper hanging.
So what are thoughts on the paper towel roll, OP?

Fuck Trump.

[Mike Mabes]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

Fuck Trump.

Sorry. Bad joke. Can't seem to edit my posts.

[Chimera]

Originally Posted by Jumpbass

Use the cat as toilet paper. That'll show it.

That comes with a free perforated labia or scrotum!

[begbert2]

Originally Posted by 74westy

The best way to prevent a cat from tearing up toilet paper is to have it declawed.

The best way to prevent a cat from tearing up toilet paper is to have yourself decatted. It works great.

[Chefguy]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

1. Ketchup is wrong. But if you also put mustard on I wouldn't make you leave my table
2. Under makes no sense at all.

And chili? Chili has beans and tomatoes, r-i-i-g-g-h-h-t?

[Mike Mabes]

Originally Posted by Chefguy

And chili? Chili has beans and tomatoes, r-i-i-g-g-h-h-t?

I happen to be making chilli right now, and it has both.

If you don't agree, fuck y...I mean Trump

[Beckdawrek]

Maybe, OP you should lay off the news for a few days. You seem to be bothered by Trump. We all ( or mostly all ), are bothered by him. I've made an attempt to ignore all the crap wafting around and only look in the news for headlines and weather. Man, do I feel better. I don't think I can do anything to change the current situation til time to vote. Which I always do. Anywhoo, IMHO.

[Mike Mabes]

Originally Posted by Beckdawrek

Maybe, OP you should lay off the news for a few days. You seem to be bothered by Trump. We all ( or mostly all ), are bothered by him. I've made an attempt to ignore all the crap wafting around and only look in the news for headlines and weather. Man, do I feel better. I don't think I can do anything to change the current situation til time to vote. Which I always do. Anywhoo, IMHO.

I'm just playing around. I didn't even look at the news today, other than a quick check of the headlines. Nothing I didn't expect.

But maybe I have found a way to channel anger, when I do get angry (I'm usually very easy going). No matter who I am arguing with, about anything, I can just say "fuck Trump."

[Chefguy]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

I happen to be making chilli right now, and it has both.

If you don't agree, fuck y...I mean Trump

My new BFF.

[Beckdawrek]

Originally Posted by Mike Mabes

I'm just playing around. I didn't even look at the news today, other than a quick check of the headlines. Nothing I didn't expect.

But maybe I have found a way to channel anger, when I do get angry (I'm usually very easy going). No matter who I am arguing with, about anything, I can just say "fuck Trump."

That works for me.

[Drunky Smurf]

Originally Posted by Chimera

That comes with a free perforated labia or scrotum!

Hey, Welcome Back!