20 days and $200 from Homelessness. Happy Graduation Sven.

The BBQ Pit
1

Yesterday I finished my last class. ever. 19 years of school. over. I turned in my last paper. I said goodbye to my last teacher. I took my last long bus ride home from campus.

I wasn’t even off the bus before I started crying. Most of a bottle of cheap port later, I was still crying. It was one of the worst days in my life.

I’m so ill prepared for the life ahead of me. It feels like everything in my world is ending. But the fact is, it really is ending.

I can’t afford to keep living in this house. It’s a rathole, for sure. But it’s $500.00 a month. I can’t afford that. I can’t afford anything, but we’ll get to that later. So my little beach cottage. In the best part of town. With a giant claw-foot tub. And big windows. And everything I could have ever wanted in a home (give or take some mold). The place where I’ve lived for two happy years. My first home. No more. I put in my thirty day notice. I’ve got till July 1st to move out.

Move out where? who knows?

There is no reason for me to be any one place. I have no job. My boyfriend and I arn’t going to survive as a couple after the move. My friends are all moving out of town. I’m a complete free agent. No purpose. I could be anywhere in the world. I could be no where. It wouldn’t matter at all. But I’ve got about 20 days to figure out something. Because that is when they are kicking me out of here. I’m 20 days from the streets (or at least moving back in with my mom, a fate marginally better than death). 20 days.

All this freedom would be nice, and even a bit liberating, if I wern’t broke. But all I’ve got is $200.00 of Christmas money that I was saving for better times. I can’t afford anything. I’m going to hold a garage sale to sell my stuff, so hopefully that will help. Still. I don’t want to sell my stuff! It’s my stuff! I don’t have much, so just about everything I do have is special to me. Still, I’m probably not going to be able to afford a room that’ll fit what little I do have. And even if I could, I don’t have a car or anyone to help me move.A and I desperatly need the money. So goodbye stuff. It’s been fun. Goodbye.

I’ve been applying for around ten jobs a day. Ten jobs that I am qualified for. Ten well written resumes sent out. Over the last months it adds up to hundreds. I’ve heard back back from exactly two people. Rejection letters. How am I going to live if I don’t have a job? How am I going to do anything without a job? I don’t even care what I am doing! I don’t give a damn what city it is in! I’m prepared to be uninsured. I’m prepared to live in a tiny rented room in somebody’s basement. I’m prepared to never have a car or savings or new clothes. I just want to be able to eat! All I want is a roof over my head and enough rice and beans so that I’m not physically hungry. If I don’t get employed, I’m going to end up burning through the money I paid for a deposit on this house. Once that is gone, how am I ever going to get a place to live again? I’m just going to be broke with no recourse and no safty net.

No job. No more boyfriend. No more friends in general. Very likely no more cat. No more money. No more stuff. No place to live. I’m losing everything I ever had. I’ve got nothing to do. No one to talk to. Nothing to eat. Nothing. Nothing. My whole world is ending. And it’s going to happen in 20 days no matter and there is nothing i can do to stop it. There is nothing I can do to hold on to even one more day of this life that I’ve been so happy and so comfortable in.

Happy graduation. Wish me luck. Wish me lots and lots of luck.

2

It is scary to be in your shoes right now. I was there once and so were countless others.

I think that now, my only regret is to not have gone into the peacecorps or gotten a job abroad.

The only advice I can give you is to really appreciate the fact that you are a free agent. Think about all the wild and crazy dreams you have and give them a shot. Now is the time.

I know it’s hard right now, but you may look back at your life one day and marvel at all the possiblities you had. Life has a way of making you settle down and not want (or be able) to take risks.

I think you’ll do just fine!
best of luck to you!

3

I’m sorry.

I know things look terrible right now. But you will find a job. You will get through this. Things will get better. I wish I could do more than offer tea and sympathy. You seem to have been through a lot over the last couple of years, and you’ve survived it. You can keep on surviving until you’re back in another happy place - maybe without the things you have and love now, but you’ll have yourself, and there will be other things you’ll find and grow to love. You will remember your first little home and you’ll remember the things in it (maybe take pictures of things, if you can, before you move out so you’ll always have those reminders of how it was)

All the luck I can spare is headed your way.

4

First step, stop the self-indulgent self-pity.

As a college graduate you will be able to find something, if perhaps not meeting initial expectations. Temp work, for example.

Nor is moving temporarily back in with parents such a terrible thing in the end. Lo these long years when I first graduated I had to do the same thing for a few months. Nothing to whinge on about or cry into drinks over.

Want scary? Scary is a graduate of a Uni over here, with a hard core degree not some frilly humanities indulgence, that looks at an economy with 20-30% unemployment and no real job prospects at all, potentially for years.

That is worthy of the despair you indulge yourself in here.

5

Play nice, dear chap. I remember being similarly shit scared when I first left Uni, and self pity is one of the few vices left these days that is neither illegal, high in calories or hazardous to those around you.

Sven, your budget seems pretty frugal. $500 per month rent, at a guess a similar amount for food and the odd night out. Time for you to get a stop gap job to tide you over while looking for a career position. Out of interest, what’s your degree in?

6

It may very well be, and I wasn’t sanguine then either, but the self-pity doesn’t help one at all, it gets in the way.

7

sven’s resume

FWIW, upon reading your background, my first thought was these guys, who do a bang-up video presentation every year. From what I can tell, they’re only looking for volunteers, though – which led me to my second thought, which is the job postings here. Hopefully that’ll give you some more leads.

8

Fair point.

Things that do help:

  1. Work out budget
  2. Add 20% for errors
  3. Work out what job or combination of jobs will pay that amount.

Certainly giving up and moving back to your folks seems a bit premature?

9

I don’t know, moving back in with the folks as part of a temporary strategy to regroup and plan out a rebound is not giving up.

There’s no shame in that. Move back for a month, two months. Some defined period of time, get a crappy summer job to collect money to rebound and then back into the market.

Frankly, summer is not a good hiring time, managers will be thinking about hiring more towards the Fall, so don’t blow the savings fruitlessly.

In short, planning. I understand very well the OP was venting, but the degree of self-pity and the expression spoke of despair. Well it’s way too early to get to despair, and despair is indeed giving up.

Step back, get a grip, plan realistically and tackle it again. And make contacts.

10

I was 33 when I left Spain and came back to Sweden. I didn’t even have a pan to boil water in and moved in with my parents. This was in '94, when unemployment went through the roof in Sweden. I didn’t have a job, no apartment, no wordly goods besides my books (in storage) and my clothes (better suited for a warmer climate). So, moving in with mom and dad sucked. Being the only child means they have always doted on me and never really accepted the fact that I’ve grown up.

But two months later I had a paid internship, which led to a job. I got a small and crummy apartment and som 2nd hand furniture and started building a life again. It was hard, but that time with my parents gave me som space. I could save money, I didn’t have to be nervous about where to live, I could get going again.

I understand that life sucks right now, and I don’t really agree with Col. No one else is pitying you, except for empty phrases, so it’s ok that you feel crummy. Don’t let it tie you down, though. Move in with your mom, get a temp job waitressing or flipping burgers or whatever, save some money and don’t send out resumes like crazy because you’re desperate. That’ll only lead to you starting to work someplace where you really don’t want to be. Try to be cool about it. You have an education and a clear goal. Focus on that and let this summer be a breather.

Best of luck.

11

If it’s something you’re interested in, now would be a good time to say, hike the Appalachian Trail, or just part of it, move home and do some volunteer work, do a stint in the Peace Corps or American Corps.

The world is your oyster right now, and you’ll probably never have such a huge block of time until you retire. Get an easy, no brainer job, save some cash and do something you’ve always wanted to do. I went back to my childhood home, got a job in a grocery, drank too much, was broke all the time, had tumultuous relationships with multiple women, wrote many stories and learned how to fly fish. After I got it out of my system, I fled the scene and got the first in a progression of real jobs.

It is definitely your life, and you only get one shot. Go have some fun.

12

I agree with you Collounsbury, except that the parent’s situation is completely absent in the OP. As the caretaker of many a friend who couldn’t move back into their parent’s house (I was forced out during high school, but was able to earn a living, so everyone lived with me), we might want to see whether or not that is a viable option.

Now is not the time for tears. Tears and alcohol won’t help. Going out the door RIGHT NOW and getting ANY job will. Even a job that you will quit in a week when you find a slightly better job. Landscaping and pizza delivery and other car-related work kept me fed and housed from age 17 to 23. Slightly shittier work for slightly higher pay than minimum wage. A college degree actually goes far in landscaping work- you get put in charge of the teams of unskilled labourers. I know, it’s not worthy of your degree, neither was it for mine. But food and rent dictate what is acceptable or not in many ways. And you can quit these types of jobs with little if any guilt on short notice once something else better comes along.

Until you are ‘set’ and sell-able, I recommend following a simple motto for survival: “If at first you don’t succeed - lower your standards.”

Good luck-
-Tcat

13

I have to agree with the others - in college during summer breaks and right after I left, I did not work in the field I was studying for. Instead, I worked in factories, and at office jobs through temp agencies. Thinking like you have to find a job in your field is limiting your ability to find any kind of job to keep the money coming in. Even if it’s just signing up with a couple of temp agencies, it’s money. You don’t have to stick with it forever, or even more than six months.

I’m concerned about the “applying for 10 jobs a day” statement. I was laid off last year, and did a lot of reading on job hunting strategies during that time. They suggested applying to fewer jobs but to research the companies involved when possible, and show in your cover letter and how your resume is targeted (tailor it to each position when applicable) that you know what the company does. Applying for hundreds of jobs that you say you’re all be well-qualified for suggests to me that perhaps you’re not doing this. I know how desperation feels, but letters and resumes that reek of it, or that seem to have been cranked out form-letter style and don’t really fit the position being advertised, will get dumped in the trash. That’s worse than taking your time and carefully applying, risking perhaps letting a job opportunity here and there slip by - because I would suspect that a resume that comes off as truly tailored and knowledgeable about the company would be more likely to be filed at HR for future openings, or sent to someone else at the company who might have a similar spot.

even, I know things seem hopeless right now, but you have to plan carefully. If going home is a viable option, do it. Otherwise, work for temp agencies, work in a coffee shop or fast food place, something. You can do it.

14

I worked the drive-through at McDonalds for three months after I graduated from my first degree. We were in a small town and not much else was even able to hire. When something better came up I moved on. In the meantime I got money and discounted/free meals. Combined with pretty much a slum apartment I was able to keep food on the table and a roof over my family(Me, Wife, and infant daughter). Once something better came within reach I dropped the McD’s job and moved on. It is a means, not an end. I knew I wouldn’t be a window jockey forever and that was pretty much what kept me going.

Good Luck, and Congrats on Graduation,
Steven

15

Have you considered enlisting in one of our Armed Forces? You could do far worse. And, if you do it now and stick it out, you will be able to retire at a relatively young age. As a college grad, you might even qualify for a commision. I wish I had done it.

16

Transitioning from one part of your life to another is always difficult, and there’s no shame in tears – my last day of college I cried my eyes out.

Take the advice of others in this thread: don’t just look for a job in your field, but find something to get by. I worked in a bakery for a while and while it wasn’t the best money in the world, I was at least able to pay bills and have some spending money until I found a better job.

Good Luck! It really will get better from here.

17

Well, **even sven, ** this thread certainly lends some perspective on other threads you’ve posted in recently. Again, I don’t know your mom’s situation, so I don’t know how real an option it is to move back in with her, even temporaily. I did it for a few months after college, and yes, she drove me bonkers most of the time, but I managed to save up money for a security deposit and move out again. Temping can also be a Good Thing, maybe even better than takng a low-level, just-above-minimum-wage job; sometimes you can make good contacts and get good experience temping, and depending on where, it can help you land a real job.

My first real job out of college was for a nonproft vocational counseling place; I got the job when my mom suggested I go in to Jewish Vocational Service, get some career advice, and look at their job listings. I did, and it just so happened that they had an entry-level opening at their Refugee Unit, which did placement for newly arrived former Soviets. Whaddaya know! I even got to use my degree! I only stayed there for a year (lousy salary for the amount of work, and even worse office politics), but I got some great experiences that I’m still drawing on, 13 years later (writing resumes, creative thinking about how to recycle professional skills, immigration and refugee policy, not to mention technical Russian).

You never know where that opportunity will pop up; sometimes nonprofits don’t pay much, but you’re certainly used to living on not much, and a situation like that might give you chances you wouldn’t ordinarily get until much later in your career.

So go ahead, blow off some steam and drown in your port for an evening if that’s what you need to do, but then I would recommend some serious brainstorming about how to use your skills. And if you haven’t looked at it already, I recommend What Color Is My Parachute? Good luck, and happy graduation!

18

Oh, and by the way, in spite of the name Jewish Vocational Service is nonsectarian; they’ll serve anyone. They operate on a sliding-scale system, at least in Chicago, so you might even get some free advice. IME the quality of their counseling staff varies wildly, but at least you’d get a crack at their job listings, many of which won’t be advertised publicly. They have offices in most major metro areas. I’m sure there are analogous nonprofits (Catholic Charities springs to mind).

19

What’s your degree in, even sven?

20

Dude, maybe you could apply to grad schools at the same time you’re applying for jobs, and then decide later which way to go based on your response.

All it takes to qualify for (at least) student loans for grad school is a pulse.

You might like law school. A lawyer is really a special kind of writer; law firms dig people with demonstrated writing skills. Plus, if you study hard in school you can come out making a whole helluva lot more than the salary requirement you put on your resume.