Old 01-15-2013, 01:22 PM
April R April R is offline
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 4,041
Epic Jewish Craigslist Ad

Shalom! We are five handsome and two not so handsome single men. And, yes, we are Jewish. Bound by tradition and emboldened by wit, we are hosting an epic Shabbat dinner — a little challah, a little wine, and a lot of gefilte fish — in downtown Washington, DC on Friday, January 18, 2013. In a nod to our orgiastic traditions, we are inviting seven lucky ladies to feast with us. Echoing the State of Israel’s Declaration of Independence, we will consider you, “irrespective of religion or race,” as long as you “bring your own lactaid pills.”

To be considered, please submit a picture of yourself. We’d also like to hear more about you!

Please answer two of the following questions with another question: What’s your favorite Shabbos activity? Which biblical forefather do you admire most and why? What would you establish as the 11th Commandment? What’s your favorite episode of Seinfeld? Curb Your Enthusiasm? Which character from Girls speaks most to your personality? What is your favorite double mitzvah? Why would you answer a Craigslist ad about a Shabbat dinner?

You must also answer two of the following, not in question form. Where do you go to get your hair straightened? Are you a self-hating Jew? Have you read Portnoy’s Complaint? Explain why a two-state solution would or would not work? How do you feel about the Shoah? What is your favorite yiddish word and farvus? Zach Braff: Dreamy, or in your dreams? Do you appreciate hairy backs?

If you answered yes to any of the questions above, what year did you go on Birthright?

If you are one of the seven chosen people, you will receive additional information regarding the time and location. We look forward to reading your reply and gawking at your picture.
Old 01-15-2013, 01:26 PM
QuickSilver QuickSilver is offline
Join Date: Mar 2000
Posts: 17,115
They've got chutzpah.
Old 01-15-2013, 02:12 PM
Agent Foxtrot Agent Foxtrot is offline
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Lost Jerusalem
Posts: 4,167
Just emailed this to my Jewish father. Mazel tov!
Old 01-15-2013, 02:17 PM
TruCelt TruCelt is offline
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Near Washington, DC
Posts: 10,151
I'd likle to print that out and put it up at the local old folks home. Wouldn't it be great if the respondents all had a granddaughter they wanted to introduce? LOL!
Old 01-15-2013, 02:19 PM
tdn tdn is offline
Join Date: Feb 2000
Posts: 35,871
If I were a chick I'd totally go to that.
Old 01-15-2013, 03:03 PM
psychobunny psychobunny is offline
Join Date: May 2000
Posts: 2,497
If I were 25 years younger I would totally go to that.
Old 01-15-2013, 06:57 PM
PandaBear77 PandaBear77 is offline
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Anyone But Obama Country
Posts: 2,349
If I were in DC I would totally go to that.
Old 01-15-2013, 07:06 PM
Ethilrist Ethilrist is online now
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Saint Paul
Posts: 26,390
"You must also answer two of the following, not in question form."

Old 01-16-2013, 05:43 PM
DocCathode DocCathode is offline
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: Philladelphia-Mummer city
Posts: 11,669
As a Jew, I feel I should say something-

Nothing is impossible if you can imagine it. That's the wonder of being a scientist!
Prof Hubert Farnsworth, Futurama


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