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Old 09-11-2019, 02:24 AM
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Beckdawreks bad, bad, bad Alien visitation. (Or WTH? did you see that)


Spurred on by an unfortunate spillage of milk, instead of crying I washed my hair. This is harder than you would think. I'm working with less than optimal use of my arms and I just had stitches removed from my forehead. But dang it, I got it done.
I remove to the deck to dry this mop. My hair being very long it takes more hair dryer power than I can muster.(arms again) It's near 95°still at 7:30. It's starting to get dark. I called the dogs back up to the deck and stand up ready to go in and I glanced over my shoulder and see a light in the sky. What? Double take. Yep, its a blue double light. It's not quite dark and I see the shadow of something between the lights. What? A green flash. Back to a double blue light. Ok, beck you're hallucinating. That head bump was worse than I thought. I went in the door and grab my phone. I look up, there's no light. Ok. I knew it, I was seeing things. I sit down on the deck chair. I'm thinking I'm gonna have to see a shrink. Jeez. Just what I need someone trying to figure out my personal brand of crazy. I put my hand on my bandaide on my forehead and through my fingers I see a blue light. WTH? It's back. I snap 2 pics real quick. It flashes green twice more. Didn't get a shot of the green flash. Dang it, I shoulda pushed record. I'm looking at the phone trying to choose record. And it's gone.
I text Son-of-a-wrek and send him the shots. He, being a conspiracy theorist decides the government is spying on me. He said to hide. Real helpful. Aliens are visiting and he wants me to get in a closet. I'm not sure about the boy somedays.
I text the lil'wrekker. She sufficiently scared. She gets her whole dormitory stirred up. Next thing I hear from her it's turned into a hallway party. Peeps are ordering pizza. I'm sure glad I could entertain a whole dorm with my Alien visit. Crap. Will no one come save me.
Mr.Wrekker went to the lakehouse. He would laugh at me anyway. No help there. Mid-daughter is in NewOrleans. I'm not even gonna bother her. Face it, beck you're all alone in this.
It gets really dark here in these woods. I'm talking black out dark w/o my security lights. I turn the lights out and decide I'm gonna camp out on the deck awhile and catch it again and hit record. And when I get it recorded I'm calling the FBI. I want Fox and Dana here in the morning. Not too early, mind you, 10am or so suits me.
Alas, I lasted 20minutes on the deck. It's too hot, my clean hair is getting sweaty. No more lights. My Daddy always said I had no stick-to-it-ness.
Well, Dopers what do you think I saw? Out here in the darkest, deepest Arkansas.
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Old 09-11-2019, 02:34 AM
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(<>..<>)

They can see you!
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Old 09-11-2019, 02:35 AM
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Aaacckkk!
That's all kinda wrong!
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Old 09-11-2019, 02:44 AM
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You don't have pinkeye, do you?

https://youtu.be/bzbSF2Tvl3U
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Old 09-11-2019, 02:57 AM
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Very funny. My life is now a Southpark episode. And here, I need the Scooby-doo gang to solve my mystery.
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Old 09-11-2019, 07:45 AM
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Beware anal probes.
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Old 09-11-2019, 09:35 AM
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How did the milk end up in your hair? I've spilled milk before, but it tends to end up in my lap, or the floor.
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Old 09-11-2019, 09:41 AM
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How did the milk end up in your hair? I've spilled milk before, but it tends to end up in my lap, or the floor.
Maybe it's really really old shampoo.

Beck, I think you have some local night birds that are trying to gaslight you.
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Old 09-11-2019, 10:02 AM
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I dropped a bowl of cereal. In a series of weird physics, it splashed upwards. Shit like that just happens to me. No explaining it.
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Old 09-11-2019, 10:07 AM
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I dropped a bowl of cereal. In a series of weird physics, it splashed upwards. Shit like that just happens to me. No explaining it.
Clearly it was the aliens doing experiments on gravitational distortion in your kitchen.
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Old 09-11-2019, 10:33 AM
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The Truth is out there!
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Old 09-11-2019, 10:38 AM
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Beware anal probes.
Why you gotta go and spoil it?
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Old 09-11-2019, 11:34 AM
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Bring it on little Greys. I'm taller and I like to kick shorties. That's why I'm banned from Oaklawn. (Horse racing)

(I have my Aluminum foil hat made)

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-11-2019 at 11:36 AM.
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Old 09-11-2019, 12:26 PM
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Bring it on little Greys. I'm taller and I like to kick shorties. That's why I'm banned from Oaklawn. (Horse racing)
Are we to interpret this to mean that you were kicking horses (who were shorter than you are) at Oaklawn?

I mean, I know you have those long dancer legs, but wow!
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Old 09-11-2019, 12:54 PM
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As long as you have your aluminum foil hat and take vitamin E, you should be fine. Be ready to move to the basement. Do you have a Geiger counter?


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Old 09-11-2019, 12:56 PM
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Maybe. My Cats can count geigers. I think.
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Old 09-11-2019, 04:37 PM
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Are we to interpret this to mean that you were kicking horses (who were shorter than you are) at Oaklawn?

I mean, I know you have those long dancer legs, but wow!
Jockeys. Those creepy little guys are all over at the track. I wanna kick 'em.
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Old 09-11-2019, 05:19 PM
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Jockeys can be a good source of tips for upcoming races, you know.
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Old 09-11-2019, 05:36 PM
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Jockeys can be a good source of tips for upcoming races, you know.
, I don't really go around kicking jockeys or little people. I kid.
But those aliens better look out!
Once I was at the track with my Daddy and he was at the bar having a drink with a jockey getting, no doubt, some good tips. I walked up and stood by as they talked horsey stuff. The jockey got ready to go and I almost..almost reached out and helped him down. Like I would a child. His head was right at my belly button height. He kinda looked at me funny, from my 6ft high head I noticed a little glimmer in his eyes. Creeped me right out, it did!
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Old 09-11-2019, 09:09 PM
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Update: I just came in from the deck with the dogs. No new sightings. I just knew I would catch a good recording.
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Old 09-12-2019, 01:40 AM
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I just knew I would catch a good recording.
"Thank you for calling the Aliens. This is a recording. To report a UFO sighting, press one. To report a UFO landing, press two. To speak with an Alien, press three. To repeat these options, press four. Again, thank you for calling the Aliens, and have a nice day."

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Old 09-12-2019, 02:00 AM
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"Thank you for calling the Aliens. This is a recording. To report a UFO sighting, press one. To report a UFO landing, press two. To speak with an Alien, press three. To repeat these options, press four. Again, thank you for calling the Aliens, and have a nice day."

Oh, noes!! Decisions, decisions.
Hmmmm?


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Old 09-12-2019, 09:34 AM
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Well, I woke up (ta-da!!).
I dreamt of Aliens and a dystopian world in the aftermath of a big Alien invasion. (Gotta quit eating pickled okra before bed)
No, I don't have vague memories of little greys taking me aboard an Alien craft and sticking probes in me. I do have a crick in my neck. Possibly from looking up at the night for 2 nights.
Any guesses as to what was flyin' around here in my neck (heh) of the boonies?

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-12-2019 at 09:35 AM.
  #24  
Old 09-12-2019, 09:52 AM
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Any guesses as to what was flyin' around here in my neck (heh) of the boonies?


We could tell you.








But then, well, you know......
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Old 09-12-2019, 09:59 AM
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I'm sober as a judge. I'm not seeing the famous 'pink elephant'
No one has asked me what I heard at time of this event.

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-12-2019 at 10:00 AM. Reason: ��
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Old 09-12-2019, 10:42 AM
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No one has asked me what I heard at time of this event.
I'm guessing Freebird.
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Old 09-12-2019, 10:50 AM
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I'm guessing Freebird.

Or CCR singing "It Came Out of the Sky."


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Old 09-12-2019, 11:08 AM
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I'm guessing it was something like this:
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Old 09-12-2019, 11:33 AM
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I'm guessing it was something like this:
Very cute! :]
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Old 09-12-2019, 06:46 PM
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I cannot believe no one on this board can guess as to what I saw. Amazing.
I'll give you a hint: it was a REAL thing. No tricks. No stars. No heliocopters or airplanes. Or weather balloons.

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-12-2019 at 06:48 PM.
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Old 09-12-2019, 07:35 PM
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I won't post a guess, because I have super-secret info that a higher intelligence provided to me.
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Old 09-12-2019, 08:44 PM
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I won't post a guess, because I have super-secret info that a higher intelligence provided to me.
This is silly. There is no government agency that hunts down witnesses, or people who communicate with witnesses, and hunts them do
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Old 09-12-2019, 08:59 PM
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OK, I have some options for you:

-Meteor: they can be different colors as they move through the atmosphere, and some of them even change colors; depending on the angle relative to you, it could look like it was in the same approximate place for a long time
-Arcing: apparently power lines can produce blue or green light flares
-Star: many stars flash in different colors, even alternating; they can be magnified by the atmosphere and appear brighter
-Government stuff: This is a pretty cool example of the sort of things governments get up to in their spare time.
-Airplane: It could have been a conventional aircraft.
-Weather: thunderclouds can create all sorts of unique effects, including plasma, also ball lightning
-Geographical phenomena: earthquakes/earth movement can create lights
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Old 09-12-2019, 09:06 PM
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Sunny, Sunny, Sunny, you're over thinking it.
None of those things are right.
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Old 09-12-2019, 10:04 PM
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Fine. You should look at the "government" one though. It was cool. Very cool.
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Old 09-12-2019, 10:25 PM
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I looked. Them deceitful devils are trying to scare lil' ol' country folk. They just need to stop. And them contrails ain't funny neither.
Poor Laplanderers.

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-12-2019 at 10:27 PM.
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Old 09-13-2019, 12:14 AM
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Don't worry about it. Let me just put these Ray-Ban's on, and look at the end of this pen <FLASH>
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Old 09-13-2019, 12:17 AM
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the last time I saw something like that, Beck, it was a neighbor's son's new drone. It was cool. Got any neighbors close enough?
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Old 09-13-2019, 01:11 AM
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the last time I saw something like that, Beck, it was a neighbor's son's new drone. It was cool. Got any neighbors close enough?
We have a winner, folks.
No neighbors but a Timber company is flying drones to count or measure trees. What I saw was a errant drone. It's possibly skuttled on my property somewhere. I'm looking for it.
So much for the Alien invasion.
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Old 09-13-2019, 07:41 AM
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We have a winner, folks.
No neighbors but a Timber company is flying drones to count or measure trees. What I saw was a errant drone. It's possibly skuttled on my property somewhere. I'm looking for it.
So much for the Alien invasion.
No Beckdawreck! This is a clever ruse by the aliens. Didn't you watch The Invaders?
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Old 09-13-2019, 09:10 AM
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No Beckdawreck! This is a clever ruse by the aliens. Didn't you watch The Invaders?
Or even Batteries Not Included?
  #42  
Old 09-13-2019, 10:42 AM
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When I find the offending beast laying pitifully askew and broken in the fork of a huge pine tree I'll get it home and nurse it back to health.
Or call the Timber co. and ask for a ransom. (or a reward)

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-13-2019 at 10:43 AM.
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Old 09-13-2019, 10:44 AM
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I'm disappointed it didn't turn out to be Elvis and Bigfoot in a flying saucer.
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Old 09-13-2019, 10:54 AM
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I'm disappointed it didn't turn out to be Elvis and Bigfoot in a flying saucer.
Me too, me too.😉
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Old 09-13-2019, 11:19 AM
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When I find the offending beast laying pitifully askew and broken in the fork of a huge pine tree I'll get it home and nurse it back to health.
If you touch it, its mother won't take it back!
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Old 09-13-2019, 11:22 AM
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Aaaccckkk. The Mothership truly scares me!

I'm a Borg now.
Resistance is Futile!!

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-13-2019 at 11:23 AM.
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Old 09-13-2019, 11:51 AM
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I'm disappointed it didn't turn out to be Elvis and Bigfoot in a flying saucer.
Beck's not too far from Fouke Arkansas. Indians were telling Bigfoot stories about that area long before this state was settled. The Legend of Boggy Creek was filmed there.



I've hunted in that area, for deer. LOL not Mr Bigfoot

Last edited by aceplace57; 09-13-2019 at 11:52 AM.
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Old 09-13-2019, 12:18 PM
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I can't spit out my backdoor and hit the county Fouke is in.
There's also the Gurdon lights down a haunted railroad track. The Amy lights down a track and powerline clearing.
I won't bring up the Uncle Phipp sightings.
Or the Maud Crawford disappearance.
The Poison Springs battlefield is rumored to be haunted.
Old Boney is in the graveyard scaring teenagers who are foolish enough to go hunting him.
And my personal favorite, the 'headless haint' is literally down my road.

Last edited by Beckdawrek; 09-13-2019 at 12:18 PM.
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Old 09-13-2019, 12:37 PM
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South Arkansas has a long history of ghost stories.

We used to tell some great ones around the campfires at Camp DeSoto.
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Old 09-13-2019, 07:55 PM
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Sorry, Beck, I think that was me. Some of my demons escaped and I had to use some real gnarly magic to get them back. I'm talking Swamp Yankee Warlock stuff, it was damn dirty. I tried to consign all the serious damage to the Void Realms, but it's tough to be sure with those deep, old spells. You'll probably be fine, but if you see any three-head snakes, two-headed dogs, or no-headed goats you should probably consult a licensed enchanter.
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