# 10 things men really know about women **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 18, 2005, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306 "2005-01-18T03:59:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 12:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/41 "2005-01-19T00:48:57Z")
> [@JohnBckWLD](#): > > 1. Women have a muffin Well, OK. Here I am. Have me, women. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/42 "2005-01-19T01:09:32Z")
Women will generalize about men in web forum posts but get very upset if men generalize about them. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/43 "2005-01-19T02:18:54Z")
Do _you_ know the muffin, man? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/44 "2005-01-19T02:26:04Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > Women will generalize about men in web forum posts but get very upset if men generalize about them. Who here is getting very upset? ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/45 "2005-01-19T02:31:43Z")
Those who started in with the ‘Women don’t fit your generalizations’ ones? ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/46 "2005-01-19T02:38:13Z")
> [@Happy Scrappy Hero Pup](#): > > Don’t forget > > 3a. Women fight all the time. > 3b. The purpose of a woman is to flip out and kill people. > I’m serious. My friend Mark said he totally saw a woman uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window. Also women kill themselves _all the time_! ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/47 "2005-01-19T02:39:09Z")
I was rather under the impression this is a joke thread. Of course we don’t think “all women” are like this. Just all of them who happen to be alive right now. ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/48 "2005-01-19T02:39:21Z")
> [@Happy Scrappy Hero Pup](#): > > Don’t forget > > 3a. Women fight all the time. > 3b. The purpose of a woman is to flip out and kill people. > I’m serious. My friend Mark said he totally saw a woman uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window. Dude. LOL. 1. Whatever happened, it is our (men’s fault). 2. They must just like asking for directions, cause god knows we never need to do it. 3. They also enjoy moving furniture around whenever they feel insecure. 4. When they feel insecure, it is our fault. 5. The only acceptable answer to a question from a woman is “Yes, dear”. 6. But not in _that_ tone of voice! 7. They get mad if you are not jealous of them speaking to other men. 8. They get mad if you are jealous of them speaking to other men. 9. They get mad if you look at other women. 10. They get mad if you do not look at other women, because that means you are avoiding doing so because you really want to. 11. They get mad. All in good fun. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine_and_Smiles)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/49 "2005-01-19T03:00:09Z")
7.) Women smell gooood. 8.) You may think you’ve got them down, but you’re wrong. So very wrong. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/50 "2005-01-19T03:11:53Z")
> [@Zebra](#): > > Womem are totally sweet. > > It’s their job to flip out and kill people. Women are sooooooooooo sweet that I want to crap my pants. I can’t believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart. These girls are totally awesome and that’s a fact. Women are fast, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and sweet. I love women with all of my body (including my pee pee). ---
**Author:** ![CynicalGabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3e96dc/32.png) [@CynicalGabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CynicalGabe)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/51 "2005-01-19T06:19:27Z")
Ok guys, enough REALULTIMATEPOWER references. Getting a little old. ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/52 "2005-01-19T07:21:26Z")
1. If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you. 2. What’s THAT supposed to mean? 3. Shoes. ---
**Author:** ![Keapon\_Laffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e274bd/32.png) [@Keapon\_Laffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Keapon_Laffin)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 7:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/53 "2005-01-19T07:29:49Z")
> [@ccwaterback](#): > > 1. If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you. LOL! 😃 1. How could you forget the third anniversary of the second time we met three months and one and a half weeks after we first got together? :mad: 2. Let me tell you \*exactly \* what I had for lunch today. ---
**Author:** ![ccwaterback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/df705f/32.png) [@ccwaterback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ccwaterback)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/54 "2005-01-19T08:10:58Z")
I forgot the double standard, there’s the way they can treat you, and there’s the way you can treat them. DON’T get the rules mixed up, OK? :: runs for cover :: ---
**Author:** ![betenoir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/258eb7/32.png) [@betenoir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/betenoir)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/55 "2005-01-19T10:02:05Z")
> [@catsix](#): > > Those who started in with the ‘Women don’t fit your generalizations’ ones? _shrugs_ They don’t. I for example don’t like roses either. But I not very upset about it. Of course it’s not my time of the month right now :D. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Master\_Killer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/34f0e0/32.png) [@The\_Master\_Killer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Master_Killer)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/56 "2005-01-19T13:58:52Z")
1. It’s been said before, but needs to be said again. Never trust an animal that can bleed for 5 days and live to talk about it. 2. After stating #1, is anything else really necessary? I’m now going to change my name and move to Mexico… ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/57 "2005-01-19T14:01:36Z")
> [@The Master Killer](#): > > 1. It’s been said before, but needs to be said again. Never trust an animal that can bleed for 5 days and live to talk about it. > > 2. After stating #1, is anything else really necessary? > I’m now going to change my name and move to Mexico… Good. Go there. Leave your rather unpleasantly juxtaposed sig line there, while you’re at it. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/58 "2005-01-19T15:02:59Z")
> [@Silver Fire](#): > > Mmm… Chocolate chip muffins… 😛 _Chocolate_? Dude. Meethinks your aim is off! ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/59 "2005-01-19T16:05:30Z")
> [@ccwaterback](#): > > 1. If you don’t know, I’m not going to tell you. > > 2. What’s THAT supposed to mean? > > 3. Shoes. 1. The Never-Ending Quest for the Ultimate Purse ™! 2. Buying shit you don’t need and probably won’t use because it is marked 75% in vast quanitites. (and the Male Corellation : buying shit they do need and will use at full price. I mean, what is up with that?) 3. Don’t even think of touching anything in her closet. But a man’s closet is fair game. Sorry, these are the Universal Rules. What’s your’s is hers. What’s hers is hers. 7)Multiply orgasms, baby. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2005, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306/60 "2005-01-19T16:10:45Z")
[ul] [li]When she says, " Don’t let me eat those chips/cake/ice cream no matter what because I am a beached whale." Instinctively know, it will be your fault.[/li][li]If she begs, whines, bribes you into buying the above forementioned food that she does not want to eat and you make her promise not to blame you for her rotund ass. It is your fault.[/li][li]If she eats like a cow during her period. It is your fault.[/li][li]If there is no junk food in the house because you fell on that grenade and ate all the Ben & Jerry’s and she is jonesing for it. It is your fault.[/li][li] If her favorite pants no longer fit. It is your fault.[/li] [li]If you bring her roses, she will say, " What did you do this time?"[/li][/ul] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/10-things-men-really-know-about-women/285306.md?page=4)