# 1000th Post party!!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [June 17, 2000, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655 "2000-06-17T00:40:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 2

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![SSgtBaloo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@SSgtBaloo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SSgtBaloo)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 5:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/21 "2000-06-17T05:46:04Z")

</div>

Put it on! I LIKE those guys!

Congrats, DITWD! I may be slow, but I’m catching up!

Hey! Where’s the blue corn nachos and buttermilk ranch dip?

[ul]_ZZZzzzzzzzzziiiiiiiip!_  
_CRASH!_[/ul]

…AND WHO SPILLED THE MASSAGE OI… _Hellloooo **NURSE!** _

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 5:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/22 "2000-06-17T05:53:35Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*
> 
> And, it would not be the same without Wally’s acerbic wit. Quick, before he starts talking, hand him a drink and one of you ladies distract him- show some more cleavage. 😃  
> Ah, Mr. Cynical, our “pro”, welcome, and please don’t hog ALL the ladies. 😃
> 
> PB: and, yes, those backrubs include EVERYTHING, I have a special “light touch” treatment that will raise goosebumps and… 😉
> 
> \*\*

Hello, Mr Cynical, I’ll be with you shortly, must pay my respects to the host after all, and entertain Wally.

Daniel, oh, my… goosebumps and…Oh, my! 🙂 \<breathles voice\> I’ll be back in a jiffy, must see to our esteemed Wally.

Standing close to Wally, and leaning towards him slightly \<hence showing a bit more cleavage than usual\> purplebear attempts to distract him with her shy voice. Being intent on Wally and her conversation, she fails to notice that she is leaning a bit more than is wise. Seeing Wally’s eyes begin to protrude, she realizes her mistake too late, and falls over, onto Wally and dragging him and three others down with her.

_ **CRASH!!** _  
\<tiny voice barely heard above the moans of the fallen\> Can someone please move off of me? Ooomph! Not that way!

:o Oh, dear! I shall never live this down now…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Danielinthewolvesden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Danielinthewolvesden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danielinthewolvesden)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 8:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/23 "2000-06-17T08:29:39Z")

</div>

PB: I almost hurt myself laughing. Wally, you owe me.

Baloo, good to see YOU, too, but do I want you behind me with that? 😃

Sterling: No, no, no. You’re supposed to LEAVE wasted out of your gourd, not arri…Oh, hell, Wally, Slythe, help me lean him up over in this corner. 😃

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 8:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/24 "2000-06-17T08:32:43Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Well, I have never been one to get too excited over # of posts, but here I am, within a few of the Big 1000, and a party seems to be a traditional thing. So, say what you think. Go, ahead, “Gush”, I’m not Cecil, my Ego is only 1 “X” L. Please criticize also, but save the flames for the PIT, please. As a special present, I am gonna ask the Moderators to PLEEEZZE delete any posts by the current crop of soon-to-be-banned-sockidiots. So, don’t reply to them.  
> Go ahead & flirt all you want, it’s MY party, but throw a bit MY way, too.  
> \*\*

“Well said: that was laid on with a trowel.”  
–As You Like It, Act 1, scene ii

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> Of course, a “zen” party would be nothing without some “zen” refreshments, so I have a bathtub full of Mt. Dew, the last case of carefully hoarded Josta, Molsens, Pacifico, & a nice chillable red. There is movie theatre popcorn, See’s chocolates, and my own home made beef jerky. Also veggie dip. There is also a coldbox full of dry ice, with 1/2 pints of gourmet ice cream. For my Observant freinds, as much as possible is Kosher, and served out of its original container, with paper plates & plastic spoons, etc.  
> \*\*

“I will show myself highly fed and lowly taught”  
–All’s Well that Ends Well, Act 2, scene ii

I would like to pay homage to one of the most well written posters on the SDMB. Dan has a truly admirable writing style!

“the Retort Courteous…the Quip Modest…the Reply Churlish…the Reproof Valiant…the Counter-cheque Quarrelsome…the Lie Circumstantial…the Lie Direct.”  
–As You Like It, Act 5, scene iv

May you have 1000 more (at least!) posts!

(mutters to self)  
“If the rascal hath not given me medicines to make me love him, I’ll be hanged; it could not be else”  
–Henry IV, Part 1, Act 2, scene ii

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/25 "2000-06-17T12:46:48Z")

</div>

Impressive: 1000 posts in about two and a half months, and all of them quality.

I brough margarita mix, and a shit load of cool Ranch Doritoes. Also Twister.

Congradulations!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Milossarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Milossarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Milossarian)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/26 "2000-06-17T13:19:00Z")

</div>

Oh no …

Nobody told me these chips were made with Olean …

OUTTA MY WAY!!!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Brea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/2bfe46/32.png) [@Brea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brea)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/27 "2000-06-17T16:34:41Z")

</div>

Daniel, you sure know how to throw a party! Congrats, btw, on your 1,000 mark! I’ve got a looooooong way to go yet for that, I’m just enjoying the ride!

Ooh! Massage oils? Ummm, got any sandalwood, or carnation? Like those spicy ones… 😉

Anybody got ice cubes? I need to cool off here…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\
**Post date:** [June 17, 2000, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/28 "2000-06-17T16:48:32Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*  
> PB: I almost hurt myself laughing. Wally, you owe me.
> 
> \*\*

\<Dropping into a deep curtsey\> purplebear blushes. “Thank you, kind sir.” As she tries to straighten up, she is almost run over by Milo, his eyes glazed at the thought of the chips on the other side of the room. “HEY!!! _Smile_ when you bump me there at least!” Daniel puts out his hand to help purplebear keep her balance, and she latches on gratefully. “Thank you again, most kind.”

Although I left a perfect opening for some of the guys, and no one picked up on it. ☹

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Danielinthewolvesden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Danielinthewolvesden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danielinthewolvesden)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/29 "2000-06-18T01:17:21Z")

</div>

Dry- as always, a scholar\* & a Gentleman.

Sealemon: Well, maybe not ALL of them, ummm, well, thanks, that IS a compliment, coming from YOU.

Milo: You DO have a quarter for the privie, don’t you? 😃  
Good to see you anyway.

Brea: no cinnamon, but I do have Musk & patchtoli, will either do?

PB: Daniel, entranced by “vast tracts of land”, begins coating his body with oil,& getting out a snorkel & a miners helmet, preparatory to diving in to the bottomless depths of snowy white cleavage… 😉

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![2sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/2/e47774/32.png) [@2sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/2sense)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/30 "2000-06-18T01:27:58Z")

</div>

I registered just over a week after you and I don’t have half your post count. And yes the quality is right up there with the quantity. You are a wonder.

BTW- I didn’t know that _ska_ music was around in the Middle Ages.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/31 "2000-06-18T01:50:12Z")

</div>

Congrats, Daniel!

I don’t belive I’ve expressed my admiration before for your writing style ::eyes glaze:: and wit ::fond softness invades eyes:: and general quality as a poster.

And all that stuff…omigod, this absolutely the best jerky I’ve ever tasted, and there are _back rubs!?_ And Guiness, I LOVE Guiness.

::comes up for air::

Did you know there are people in dubious jerkins strumming lutes in your backyard? And they’re starting to joust with Wally, w/ Purplebear’s bikini top dangling from…?

Nevermind.

Veb

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/32 "2000-06-18T01:58:38Z")

</div>

Glancing up at Daniel, purplebear notices a peculiar glazed look coming into his eyes as he looks down at her. Stopping her comments in mid-sentence, as he is obviously not paying the slightest attention to anything she has said for the last few minutes, she decides it’s time for some distraction. Well, sort of. 😉

You don’t mind waiting your turn, do you, Brea? 🙂

Taking his arm again, she leads him in the direction of the back rub room, and finding it empty, asks for a back rub. With his choice of either musk or patchouli. He politely turns his back as she takes off her dress to reveal her purple bikini, and she lays down on the table. “I’m ready. You can look now.”

OH, yesssssss, that’s the spot. Right there; oh, a little more to the left now. MMMmmmmmmmmmmmm…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![purrplebear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/90ced4/32.png) [@purrplebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purrplebear)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/33 "2000-06-18T02:02:27Z")

</div>

Hey, wait just a minute, Veb! I still have my bikini top on. Well, for a little while longer anyway. That must be someone else’s top. Hmmmmmmm…I wonder who’s it could be?  
Oh, sorry. I’ll be still. Didn’t mean to move on you, Daniel. Oh, wait. That didn’t come out right. :o I meant… oh, heck, I give up.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/35 "2000-06-18T02:33:05Z")

</div>

::hushed voice::

You don’t mean…there’s someone else at this party or Daniel’s family who sports a purple bikini top? Or in this case, _doesn’t_?

Well, doesn’t look like the guy w/ the lute cares.

::judiciously sips drink, blinks to improve night vision::

Veb

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Medea\_s\_Child](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8baadc/32.png) [@Medea\_s\_Child](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Medea_s_Child)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/36 "2000-06-18T03:06:27Z")

</div>

Backrubs?  
shakesphere?  
cool Ranch Doritos?  
Please let me in!

I’ll be a good little newbie, I promise!

\<innocent, sparkling grin\>

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Danielinthewolvesden](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce7236/32.png) [@Danielinthewolvesden](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Danielinthewolvesden)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/37 "2000-06-18T04:39:52Z")

</div>

Did I just get “zen” laid at my “zen” party? If not, why do my shorts smell like musk oil? And why do I have this funny purple hat on my head? And why are my EARS full of massage oil??? 😕 (looking into shorts): I know blue’s for 1st prize, but what’s a green ribbon for?  
2sense: glad to see YOU too, and that’s not Ska, that’s Tempest- Celtic rock. 😃

TV: those are certified period jerkins, but why they are always taking them off, I don’t know. And did that top match this hat? 😛

Medea: watch were you point that wand, young lady, I’ve got moly, you know. And, no, we DON’T want any “good” little anythings around here, if you catch my drift… 😉

Loss: no, that’s massage oil & guiness, we don’t have any “cross post”. Does it come in a bottle or a can? 😃

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/38 "2000-06-18T07:21:40Z")

</div>

Great party goin’ on! BTW, I have been told that I give the best footrubs on the left coast, so who’s first? 🙂

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Byzantine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dfb087/32.png) [@Byzantine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Byzantine)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/39 "2000-06-18T07:51:18Z")

</div>

I was told I could, “mathc wits with a drunken Wally” by Mr. 1000 posts but then I saw that Xgemina brought a straw… anyone want to jump on that one? No? Gee, no one has told this person about the straw thing? And you call this a party?

Now, I was dragged over here from the pit so I’ll refrain from any bad fucking dirty language. Shit, everyone is so worried about me being nothing but a potty mouth. I really don’t have any fuckig idea why…

So… who’s got the beer tap? Lite beer? Who the fuck brought that shit? Here, I have some REAL beer. I have some great steaks too… you want fries with that?

Now, where’s the porno? Where are the body gels? Where the hell are my strap on tools? Oh, wow, is that spinach dip?

And foot rubs? No, no, I’ve read you have… other… talents. But I’ll take a foot rub if that is all you are offering…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Xgemina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/b5e925/32.png) [@Xgemina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xgemina)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/40 "2000-06-18T08:09:56Z")

</div>

::looking around worriedly::  
ahh, what straw thing?

wow, I got to come to these parties more often. Anyone need their honor defended yet? Got my armour just out back. That is, of course, if the lord of the manor and excellent party host doesn’t mind…

And about that straw thing…

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![JBurton99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ea5d25/32.png) [@JBurton99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBurton99)\
**Post date:** [June 18, 2000, 8:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655/41 "2000-06-18T08:35:59Z")

</div>

Congrat’s Daniel. :bowing head in honor of 1000:

I’ll go be a wall flower now, like a good newbie. 😃

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655.md?page=1)

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/1000th-post-party/22655.md?page=3)
