# 12 comic book ads that taught us to be cynical **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 26, 2008, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643 "2008-05-26T12:47:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/1 "2008-05-26T12:47:14Z")
I love this. As a gullible child I either bought or wanted almost all of these. [Ads that make us cynical](http://www.cracked.com/article_16310_12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-be-cynical.html) (I dunno, it is mundane and pointless, but it is _kind of_ CAFE… I’ll leave it to a mod to decide.) ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/2 "2008-05-26T15:40:35Z")
[Here’s](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v133/tigereye001/scan0001-2.jpg) one I scanned in from an issue of Extinct Comics. Good times. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/3 "2008-05-26T15:42:20Z")
[QUOTE=Khadaji] I love this. As a gullible child I either bought or wanted almost all of these. [/QUOTE] Meh. Nothing but “Top X whatever” linkbait articles on the Cracked site. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/4 "2008-05-26T15:51:50Z")
[QUOTE=Kythereia] [Here’s](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v133/tigereye001/scan0001-2.jpg) one I scanned in from an issue of Extinct Comics. Good times. 😃 [/QUOTE] 😃 No doubt I would have wanted one of those too! I was a sucker for glow-in-the-dark stuff (still am actually) and I enjoy being kissed too. ---
**Author:** ![askeptic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@askeptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/askeptic)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/5 "2008-05-26T15:59:25Z")
No mention of SeaMonkies? ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/6 "2008-05-26T17:11:58Z")
Charles Atlas and his bodybuilding system made a lot of us cynical. ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/7 "2008-05-26T22:14:38Z")
[QUOTE=askeptic] No mention of SeaMonkies? [/QUOTE] I agree. They should’ve included the brine shrimp (… _of doom!_) in that list. ---
**Author:** ![AuntiePam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f19dbf/32.png) [@AuntiePam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AuntiePam)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/8 "2008-05-26T22:29:19Z")
The Charles Atlas ad was the first one I thought of too. Did anybody else send away for greeting cards? I did, when I was 9 or 10. Sell the cards, make lots of money. The catch is that you have to pay for the cards when they arrive, not after you sell them. Mom made me send them back. Now that I think about it, I’m surprised they didn’t want money **before** shipping the cards. This was in 1955 or thereabouts. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/9 "2008-05-26T23:07:54Z")
[QUOTE=AuntiePam] The Charles Atlas ad was the first one I thought of too. Did anybody else send away for greeting cards? I did, when I was 9 or 10. Sell the cards, make lots of money. The catch is that you have to pay for the cards when they arrive, not after you sell them. Mom made me send them back. Now that I think about it, I’m surprised they didn’t want money **before** shipping the cards. This was in 1955 or thereabouts. [/QUOTE] Yep, I did that too. Was gonna be rich! ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/10 "2008-05-26T23:20:56Z")
I remember ads talking about how much money you could make either selling or delivering\* a nationwide newspaper called Grit. I don’t think I ever heard about Grit anywhere but in those ads. \*It was forty-plus years ago, so my memory is a bit foggy. ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/11 "2008-05-26T23:25:13Z")
I found [20 Websites From Before the Internet was Invented](http://www.cracked.com/article_16304_20-websites-from-before-internet-was-invented.html) hilarious. Jesus H. Christ’s Facebook page & Anne Frank’s LiveJournal are great, but the #1 entry … well, I won’t spoil it 😃 ---
**Author:** ![KlondikeGeoff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3e96dc/32.png) [@KlondikeGeoff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KlondikeGeoff)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2008, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/12 "2008-05-26T23:58:23Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] Charles Atlas and his bodybuilding system made a lot of us cynical. [/QUOTE] I never knew anybody who fell for the ads, but when I grew up, I asked some weight lifter friends about it. Atlas really did build himself up, and it was by using isometric, rather than isotonic exercises. I think, but it was long ago, that he called them “dynamic tension.” They do work, but probably take far longer to increase bulk than weights. Also, more effective in building strength than bulk. One friend said that the York Barbell Co. made money by selling iron and Charles Atlas made it by selling paper. ---
**Author:** ![Ruffian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@Ruffian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruffian)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/13 "2008-05-27T00:08:51Z")
Sea Monkeys, Sea Monkeys, Sea Monkeys. My 6yro self thought they’d have crowns, and a castle, and cute little outfits…and got…fish food. In green water. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 12:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/14 "2008-05-27T12:07:46Z")
The filter at work won’t let me open it, but I['ve always wondered about **Grog Grows Own Tail** : > **[Grog Grows Own Tail](http://fourrealities.blogspot.com/2006/02/grog-grows-own-tail.html)** > > I have no idea what this thing is... ...but somehow I now find myself in the market for one. Score one for the power of advertising. ... > **[Silver Age Comics](http://sacomics.blogspot.com/2007_07_01_archive.html)** > > Mostly Dedicated to Comics Published from 1955-1970 ---
**Author:** ![Cheez\_Whia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d26b3c/32.png) [@Cheez\_Whia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheez_Whia)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/15 "2008-05-27T12:26:28Z")
[Grit](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grit_%28newspaper%29) was a real newspaper. There was a kid in my town that would peddle it door-to-door. My parents bought a few copies. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/16 "2008-05-27T12:56:21Z")
[QUOTE=Cheez\_Whia] [Grit](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grit_%28newspaper%29) was a real newspaper. There was a kid in my town that would peddle it door-to-door. My parents bought a few copies. [/QUOTE] Yep. I lived in Williamsport for (too) many years and the townsfolk mourned when it shut down. (OK, the old-timers did.) ---
**Author:** ![Find\_Friends](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c37758/32.png) [@Find\_Friends](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Find_Friends)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/17 "2008-05-27T13:26:32Z")
[QUOTE=Khadaji] As a gullible child I either bought or wanted almost all of these. [/QUOTE] So which ones did you send away for? Any positive experiences from sending away for stuff advertised in “funny books?” * * * Here’s the main thing I wanted to write about. I was fairly old when I came across the “money-making” gimmick, and I’m not sure what I would have thought about it if I were younger. Maybe I would have thought that it was supposed to actually print a dollar bill. Maybe I would have realized that such would be nothing but trouble if it actually worked and one tried to use one for cash. But actually I just assumed it was a bit of amateur stage magic and that since no new bills were actually produced it was harmless. And I just figured that everybody else, at least excluding those with serious shortages of brain-power, would realize it as well. (At least kids my own age, if I thought about it that far!) In hindsight, it seems that this would be prosecution-worthy. After all, it is about selling stuff to kidlets. It also seemed obvious to me that selling green rocks was just that! One would either feel it worth it to shell out the dough for the amusement or not. I may have just assumed that the green paint was luminescent, and if not, I was wrong. But it’s moot. At that age I simply was not interested. At an earlier age, before some marketing genius had come up with MY! IDEA! :mad: I simply made my own Superman-killing stone with a green crayon-- with perhaps a layer of aluminum foil in between. * * * The X-Ray Specs ad is very cleverly written, and refers to an optical EFFECT that really works, and asks rhetorical questions about whether you are really seeing through things. \<\\> (paraphrased) Even though I was young at the time I was clever enough to “see through” what it was all about and would never have sent in the money **even if I had any** (insert violin strings here). * * * Did anyone ever send away for the 99+ little magnets that make one big one? I’d like to think that that was not a rip-off, since that was the one thing I really wanted. _sniff_ - TBJ Edited to add “paraphrased” to the paraphrase. - Me ---
**Author:** ![RiverRunner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/977dab/32.png) [@RiverRunner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RiverRunner)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/18 "2008-05-27T13:48:00Z")
[QUOTE=KlondikeGeoff] Atlas really did build himself up, and it was by using isometric, rather than isotonic exercises. I think, but it was long ago, that he called them “dynamic tension.” [/QUOTE] Yes. Thus the use of the term by Dr. Frank-N-Furter in **The Rocky Horror Picture Show**. **Frank** : He’ll do press-ups, and chin-ups. Do the snatch, clean and jerk. He thinks dynamic tension must be hard work. Such strenuous living I just don’t understand. When in just seven days, oh baby, I can make you a man. **Frank** : I don’t want no dissension. Just dynamic tension. **Janet** : I’m a muscle fan! RR ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/19 "2008-05-27T13:55:23Z")
I so wanted the x-ray specs but not for the bones in my hand. I also always wanted the 5000 piece army/navy set but another kid told me the were tiny bits of cardboard with a blurry picture on them. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2008, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643/20 "2008-05-27T13:55:37Z")
Here’s a fascinating page I came across some time ago – **Comic Book Flats** [http://home.att.net/~1.elliott/comicbooktoysoldierflats.html](http://home.att.net/~1.elliott/comicbooktoysoldierflats.html) It’s all those “100 Army Men”/“100 Revolutionary War Soldiers”/“100 Confederate and Union Troops”/“100 dollls” that they always advertised in the backs of comic books (“They come packed in their own Footlocker!”) I never knew anyone who actually ordered these, so I was interestee in what they actually looked like. By the way, I have an article about those “Now! You can Draw like an aretist! Even if you Can’t Draw a Straight Line!” ads in an upcoming issue of Optics and Photonics News. I just approved the layout. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-comic-book-ads-that-taught-us-to-be-cynical/450643.md?page=2)