# 12-year-old Florida girl commits suicide after a year of being bullied online **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 12, 2013, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693 "2013-09-12T20:25:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/1 "2013-09-12T20:25:11Z")
> [@](#): > > Investigators had identified at least 15 girls who were involved in the social media circle of a 12-year-old Lakeland girl who took her own life following more than a year of constant bullying. > > At a press conference today, Polk County Sheriff Grady Judd said it appears Rebecca Ann Sedwick jumped to her death at an old cement business after being beat down with hate messages online. > > Sedwick was reported missing Monday about 7 p.m. when she didn’t come home from school, the Sheriff’s Office said. > > Deputies searched for several hours before finding Sedwick about 2:25 a.m. lying on the ground at a former Cemex cement site on North Eastside Drive in Lakeland, the Sheriff’s Office said. [Congratulations, kids, you’re looking at felonies.](http://www.theledger.com/article/20130912/NEWS/130919724) ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/2 "2013-09-12T21:19:05Z")
…nevermind ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/3 "2013-09-12T21:37:29Z")
WHY did she keep looking at posts where people were saying things like this to her? Being stuck in a school or other environment is one thing, but if you’re online, all you have to do is NOT VISIT THAT WEBSITE. Lest anyone think I’m blaming the victim, when I was her age, I had to put up with things like a girl who wanted her brothers to gang-rape me so I would get pregnant and have to leave school, and the attitude of my parents and other people in authority was “Why do you let them do this to you?” and “They probably did this to you because of something you did to them to embarrass us.” :mad: One of my classmates tried to get me to kill myself, and he got his a few years after we graduated when his father committed suicide. I’ve always felt it was karma. ---
**Author:** ![aNewLeaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@aNewLeaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aNewLeaf)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/4 "2013-09-12T21:38:46Z")
> [@](#): > > He said it appears that the bullying started sometime in 2012 and was physical at her former school, Crystal Lake Middle School, and then moved to completely online. Why didn’t anyone turn off the internet? Why is a 12 year old using social media with no supervision? Why didn’t this girl tell her mom or anyone else she was being bullied by 15(?) people at once? Why did she keep reading all these hateful messages? ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/5 "2013-09-12T21:44:07Z")
> [@aNewLeaf](#): > > Why didn’t anyone turn off the internet? Why is a 12 year old using social media with no supervision? > Why didn’t this girl tell her mom or anyone else she was being bullied by 15(?) people at once? > Why did she keep reading all these hateful messages? It IS possible that her school and parents were like mine, and she knew that nothing was going to be done about it. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/6 "2013-09-12T21:49:46Z")
I think the key here is: DO NOT LET YOUR KIDS GO ON THE INTERNET WITHOUT SUPERVISION. 12 year olds should not have a phone with internet access enabled and they should not have a computer in their bedroom, in my opinion. ---
**Author:** ![Longshanks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Longshanks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Longshanks)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/7 "2013-09-12T22:03:02Z")
> [@lavenderviolet](#): > > I think the key here is: DO NOT LET YOUR KIDS GO ON THE INTERNET WITHOUT SUPERVISION. 12 year olds should not have a phone with internet access enabled and they should not have a computer in their bedroom, in my opinion. How feasible is this wishful thinking of yours do you think? ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/8 "2013-09-12T22:12:20Z")
I wonder if kids go back to those social media sites because they always have a glimmer of hope that someone will white knight for them. Or maybe it’s the desire to “set the record straight” that has them returning. Like, if someone accused me of doing something that I didn’t do, I might be tempted to convince the mob the accuser is a liar. My pride wouldn’t let me just walk away from that. I do agree cyber bullying is different than meatspace bullying. In the latter, it really is hard to just “walk away”. But we have to remember we’re talking about a 12-year-old. Twelve-year-olds aren’t known for wise decision-making. The bullying may also have more of a delayed reaction when it’s online, which means it’s easier to “OD” on it. I dunno. Those are just my WAGs. I hope every one of those girls does jail time. Florida sucks, but I do agree cyber stalking is every bit a crime. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/9 "2013-09-12T22:13:05Z")
Based on my experience growing up in the 90s and early 00s, pretty feasible. It means you have to parent, though, so. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/10 "2013-09-12T22:18:53Z")
> [@Longshanks](#): > > How feasible is this wishful thinking of yours do you think? So your saying it is impossible for parents to NOT buy their kid a phone with internet access and impossible for them to NOT buy them a computer/laptop for them to have in their room where they can surf unsupervised? ---
**Author:** ![aNewLeaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@aNewLeaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aNewLeaf)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/11 "2013-09-12T22:24:02Z")
Unsupervised for a year while fifteen kids bullied her to suicide. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/12 "2013-09-12T22:26:27Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > WHY did she keep looking at posts where people were saying things like this to her? Being stuck in a school or other environment is one thing, but if you’re online, all you have to do is NOT VISIT THAT WEBSITE. Really? Out of sight, out of mind? If all your friends visit that website, it is hurtful knowing others are spreading lies and insults to everyone you know. You think kids don’t treat her differently after reading slander about her online? You advice is to online bullying as “Just Say NO!” was to drug abuse. ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/13 "2013-09-12T22:31:28Z")
If she had no other Internet access she’d still have the other kids at school telling her what’s being said about her online. Plus kids have to go online to do schoolwork and eventually slime like bullying has a way of getting past protections online. It wasn’t the bullied girl who needed more parenting, it was the bullies who attacked her online for the last year. Stop blaming the victim and start accepting that people hurting others need to be stopped, not their targets. ---
**Author:** ![CLee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f19dbf/32.png) [@CLee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CLee)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/14 "2013-09-12T22:34:14Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > One of my classmates tried to get me to kill myself, and he got his a few years after we graduated when his father committed suicide. I’ve always felt it was karma. What in the world is wrong with you? What an ugly thing to say. > [@aNewLeaf](#): > > Why didn’t anyone turn off the internet? Why is a 12 year old using social media with no supervision? > Why didn’t this girl tell her mom or anyone else she was being bullied by 15(?) people at once? > Why did she keep reading all these hateful messages? > [@nearwildheaven](#): > > WHY did she keep looking at posts where people were saying things like this to her? Being stuck in a school or other environment is one thing, but if you’re online, all you have to do is NOT VISIT THAT WEBSITE. Good Lord, how old are you two? It’s likely that this kid was savvy enough to fool her parents into thinking she was using the internet in a productive manner in order to avoid losing her privileges, and it’s just as likely that her parents weren’t paying close attention. At any rate, a lot of preteens and teens today have near constant access to social media and demanding they have the maturity to avoid online gossip and bullying is asking quite too much. Grown adults here are unable to handle criticism without a total meltdown, just look at the threads in this forum for proof. This format, like it or not, is the primary way modern kids interact and socialize and it’s out of touch people like you who blame the victims rather than the mean little shits who terrorized her. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/15 "2013-09-12T22:41:18Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > Based on my experience growing up in the 90s and early 00s, pretty feasible. > > It means you have to parent, though, so. They didn’t HAVE social media in the '90s-'00s. Cell-phones were not ubiquitous (they were barely feasible). And you didn’t need a home PC/laptop to keep up with your homework assignments. Welcome to 2014. ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/16 "2013-09-12T23:01:30Z")
> [@aNewLeaf](#): > > Unsupervised for a year while fifteen kids bullied her to suicide. Do you even have kids? There is a fair chunk of time between the end of the school day and when you get home from work. There is a fair chunk of time while they’re in their room doing homeowrk while you’re making dinner and doing a bit of housekeeping. You can’t helicopter the kid all the time. And it’s tough to get into their little heads even when you do manage to force yourself into their lives for 30 or so minutes before bedtime (less time if you’ve got more kids). They sure as hell won’t tell you about something that embarasses them–which counts being bullied. ---
**Author:** ![lavenderviolet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/cdc98d/32.png) [@lavenderviolet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lavenderviolet)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/17 "2013-09-12T23:02:26Z")
There is no reason that any 12 yo needs an internet-enabled smart phone. There are adults who still don’t have smart phones. As for doing homework online, I didn’t say the kid should never use a computer. I just said you should be supervising them. One way to do that would be to require the kid to use the computer in the living room in front of the rest of the family so you can see what they’re doing. Since filtering software was around even when I was young in the 90s, I’m sure it’s still an option. Another option would be to do what my mom did when I was a kid online: Log into the computer after the kid is done and read what conversations your kid is having online. Back when I was a kid, many parents were clueless about the Internet and didn’t understand why they should keep their kid away from it. If anything, now that most parents know what the Internet is and have an idea about the crazy shit on it, people should be more savvy about protecting their kids than they were back when I was young. Yes, it is a good thing that the bullies in this case are being prosecuted. They shouldn’t have been doing this kind of thing in the first place. However, that doesn’t bring back the little girl who died. You can’t count on a bully to have good parents. You can’t count on a bully to be intelligent and rational enough to recognize that their actions could lead to horrible things and legal problems. You have to protect your kid yourself, as much as you can. I would think most good parents would not let their kid have unsupervised access to a television with porn channels on it. I don’t understand why anyone would think the internet is any different. There is far more twisted shit on the internet than in any mainstream porn. ---
**Author:** ![aNewLeaf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ac91a4/32.png) [@aNewLeaf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aNewLeaf)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/18 "2013-09-12T23:18:24Z")
> [@The Great Sun Jester](#): > > Do you even have kids? There is a fair chunk of time between the end of the school day and when you get home from work. There is a fair chunk of time while they’re in their room doing homeowrk while you’re making dinner and doing a bit of housekeeping. You can’t helicopter the kid all the time. > > And it’s tough to get into their little heads even when you do manage to force yourself into their lives for 30 or so minutes before bedtime (less time if you’ve got more kids). They sure as hell won’t tell you about something that embarasses them–which counts being bullied. I was a kid, does that count as experience with kids? Also, I was bullied. A kid gets so freaked out over online messages that she kills herself, and spends a year doing it. You wouldn’t notice if that happened to your kid? ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/19 "2013-09-12T23:18:40Z")
For all intents and purposes, cyberspace and meatspace are all the same: a unified social milieu that must be mastered to acquire admission into the big, foreboding world of adulthood. ---
**Author:** ![CLee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f19dbf/32.png) [@CLee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CLee)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693/20 "2013-09-12T23:24:37Z")
> [@lavenderviolet](#): > > I would think most good parents would not let their kid have unsupervised access to a television with porn channels on it. I don’t understand why anyone would think the internet is any different. There is far more twisted shit on the internet than in any mainstream porn. Quite a few parents who friend their children probably believe they are privy to all the comments, and aren’t as savvy about the settings, which allow the page owner to block certain comments from other users. I hope her parents find the grace to let the public know if and how they failed to catch the behavior, for no other reason than a cautionary tale. This is a lesson no other parents of bullied or bullies should ever have to learn. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/12-year-old-florida-girl-commits-suicide-after-a-year-of-being-bullied-online/668693.md?page=2)