# 2 sentence horror stories **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 26, 2013, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639 "2013-07-26T23:44:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/41 "2013-07-28T01:10:07Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Two years after we boarded up the door, the scratching finally stopped. “I told you a flea circus was a bad idea!”\* \*Two sentences. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/42 "2013-07-28T01:14:14Z")
“This almond mushroom soup is delicious, Stephanie!” He then noticed that she hadn’t touched hers at all. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/43 "2013-07-28T01:51:06Z")
They say that inside every fat man there is a thin man trying to get out. The terrible thin man stood over the fat, eviscerated corpse, laughing and laughing. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/44 "2013-07-28T01:55:36Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > \*Two sentences. 😉 If you want to do it the easy way, sure. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/45 "2013-07-28T02:04:06Z")
We’re in the kitchen, just returned from dinner out at our favorite restaurant when the phone begins ringing. I don’t immediately understand my wife’s horrified expression until she says "That’s the _intercom_ - someone’s calling _from inside the house!"_ Actually that’s no made-up story. It happened to us last Friday. ---
**Author:** ![IvoryTowerDenizen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ivorytowerdenizen/32/17937_2.png) [@IvoryTowerDenizen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/IvoryTowerDenizen)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/46 "2013-07-28T02:08:07Z")
> [@Jackmannii](#): > > We’re in the kitchen, just returned from dinner out at our favorite restaurant when the phone begins ringing. I don’t immediately understand my wife’s horrified expression until she says "That’s the _intercom_ - someone’s calling _from inside the house!"_ > > Actually that’s no made-up story. It happened to us last Friday. And…? Power surge? Crossed lines? Intruder? ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/47 "2013-07-28T02:14:54Z")
Is this the _real_ **Jackmannii** posting to this thread?!? ---
**Author:** ![Quimby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/22d042/32.png) [@Quimby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quimby)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/48 "2013-07-28T02:50:38Z")
She dripped rain all over his car as she slipped into the front seat, muttering, “Thanks for the ride, Mister”. And then he saw the teeth. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/49 "2013-07-28T03:00:14Z")
We all owe the gods a death. I work for the collection agency. ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/50 "2013-07-28T03:01:50Z")
Hello, we’re here for your liver. ---
**Author:** ![KRC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@KRC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KRC)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 3:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/51 "2013-07-28T03:46:34Z")
We finally buried Stalin! In the same tomb Jesus was buried in. ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Sunshine\_and\_Smiles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine_and_Smiles)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/52 "2013-07-28T05:00:37Z")
“Just sleeping, it’s late,” I mumbled. Then I remembered that for six years, living in the city, I had been alone. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/53 "2013-07-28T05:17:37Z")
She had posed for SI’s swimsuit issue to pay for acting lessons. When he held the razor to her throat, the last words she heard were “Actress slash model.” ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/54 "2013-07-28T05:21:49Z")
He sat on the toilet, ready to relieve himself. Suddenly something reached up through the water and grabbed him by the balls. ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/55 "2013-07-28T05:27:35Z")
“You thought you were so clever, locking all the monsters out and swallowing the key. You should have realized you were locking yourself in with me.” ---
**Author:** ![montag01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/51bf81/32.png) [@montag01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/montag01)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/56 "2013-07-28T05:30:59Z")
As I posted on a friend’s Facebook thread dedicated to this topic: “For sale: baby shoes. Size 22.” ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/57 "2013-07-28T08:09:09Z")
The light glistened off the doctor’s black-green carapace, and danced in his compound eyes, but as always, it was the scalpel that seized my attention. The mass of mandibles and coarse, wet fur that served as his mouth clicked and raspedat me: “Alright, Mr. Johnson, just a few more surgeries and you should be perfectly normal.” ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 8:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/58 "2013-07-28T08:11:27Z")
When he smiled at me in the bar last night, I thought to myself, “He has really nice teeth.” But it turns out, they really make my jaw ache. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/59 "2013-07-28T09:18:34Z")
Wow, what a wild chick, what a wild ride, what a wild night! Wait, what the fuck am I doing in a bathtub full of ice? ---
**Author:** ![Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/half_man_half_wit/32/21766_2.png) [@Half\_Man\_Half\_Wit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Half_Man_Half_Wit)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2013, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639/60 "2013-07-28T09:32:11Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > He felt a moment of the most profound sadness when he thought of his diagnosis, of how the memories and hopes and dreams he’d built over a lifetime would slip away forever, the passage of his life fading without a trace. > > He felt a moment of the most profound sadness when he thought of his diagnosis, of how the memories and hopes and dreams he’d built over a lifetime would slip away forever, the passage of his life fading without a trace. Awesome. * * * Only dimly awake, I felt my wife snuggling up closer to me. Then, through the haze of sleep and whiskey from the evening before, I remembered her funeral. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2-sentence-horror-stories/664639.md?page=4)