# 2012 nominees for the Ballsiest Excuse of the Year **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 5, 2012, 9:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484 "2012-01-05T09:22:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2012, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/161 "2012-01-07T22:10:28Z")
> [@The\_Second\_Stone](#): > > I don’t need to know or speculate on motivation is someone says the word “black” and another person asserts that they have listened and didn’t hear “black”. It’s a lie. Some things are actually black and white. Not motivations, but Santorum uttering “black” is a fact, not a matter of opinion. Your _belief_ that Santorum said Black is a fact, not a matter of opinion. > [@Terraplane](#): > > You are unreasonably certain of your perceptions. Perceptions can be fooled by a lot of things. What you hear can depend on what you expect to hear. Sometimes even your eyes can influence what you hear. Here’s an interesting example of that. [Link](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-lN8vWm3m0). Excellent! ---
**Author:** ![mlees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2012, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/162 "2012-01-09T22:19:23Z")
> [@Terraplane](#): > > You are unreasonably certain of your perceptions. Perceptions can be fooled by a lot of things. What you hear can depend on what you expect to hear. Sometimes even your eyes can influence what you hear. Here’s an interesting example of that. [Link](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-lN8vWm3m0). Wow. Even while being TOLD what that professor was saying, half my brain was see/hearing something else! ---
**Author:** ![slumtrimpet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@slumtrimpet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slumtrimpet)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/163 "2012-01-19T02:12:41Z")
I think Captain Schettino deserves a ballsiest excuse nomination: [Costa Concordia: Flee? I just tripped into a lifeboat, says captain](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/italy/9023753/Costa-Concordia-Flee-I-just-tripped-into-a-lifeboat-says-captain.html) > [@](#): > > Francesco Schettino, the Italian cruise liner captain accused of abandoning his stricken vessel with passengers still trapped on-board claimed he left the ship only because he “tripped” and fell into a lifeboat while trying to help with the evacuation. … > [@](#): > > Also with him in the lifeboat was Dimitri Christidis, the Greek second-in-command of the Concordia and Silvia Coronica, the third officer, according to Italian reports. I suppose the deck _was_ very slippery and the boat was listing in a pretty alarming way… Poor guys. Could happen to anyone. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/164 "2012-01-19T03:00:16Z")
I second that nomination. What a piece of work! ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 3:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/165 "2012-01-19T03:32:14Z")
Whoa, he _tripped_ into the lifeboat? Tripped over his second-in-command? I wonder if he’s listened to the get-the-fuck-back-on-the-boat-and-help-us-the-fuck-out tapes yet? We definitely have our first nominee in the \*\*non-political, private citizen \*\*category. ---
**Author:** ![G-SE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f0a364/32.png) [@G-SE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G-SE)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/166 "2012-01-19T04:28:29Z")
For those of you trying the sad, lame attempt to pull something racist out of Santorum’s accidental reference to Iowa’s “Department of Health and Human Services” as the “Department of Public Welfare”, guess what… In Pennsylvania, where Santorum was Senator, it is called… drumroll… [Pennsylvania Department of Public Welfare](http://www.dpw.state.pa.us/) … which also contains an [Office of Medical Assistance Programs](http://www.dpw.state.pa.us/dpworganization/officeofmedicalassistanceprograms/index.htm) that helps people sign up for medicaid. I’m sure that will be ignored by 95% of the members here that are intent on finding something racist about the statement. ---
**Author:** ![Rhythmdvl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/85f322/32.png) [@Rhythmdvl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhythmdvl)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/167 "2012-01-19T05:01:09Z")
> [@G-SE](#): > > For those of you trying the sad, lame attempt to pull something racist out of Santorum’s accidental reference to Iowa’s “Department of Health and Human Services” as the “Department of Public Welfare”, guess what… > > In Pennsylvania, where Santorum was Senator, it is called… drumroll… > > [Pennsylvania Department of Public Welfare](http://www.dpw.state.pa.us/) > > … which also contains an [Office of Medical Assistance Programs](http://www.dpw.state.pa.us/dpworganization/officeofmedicalassistanceprograms/index.htm) that helps people sign up for medicaid. > > I’m sure that will be ignored by 95% of the members here that are intent on finding something racist about the statement. I’m sorry, you want “I didn’t Read the Thread” thread, three down from this one. Though I’m hesitant to use an absolute, _ **no one is saying that mixing up the names of the welfare agencies is racist** _. The worst charge levied against him is the subconscious association with black people being on welfare. I don’t think there are even many voices saying he was race-baiting. It’s a fairly minor issue. It’s also kind of ancillary to the thread. He said (to most people) the word “black.” His excuse “I didn’t say it but even though it fits and I’ve no idea what else I could have been saying, I’m still sticking to ‘I didn’t say it’” is nominated for the Ballsiest Excuse of the Year. That said, if you have a ballsy excuse for making such an idiotic statement please submit your nomination to the appropriate committee. ---
**Author:** ![FinnAgain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/finnagain/32/12500_2.png) [@FinnAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FinnAgain)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2012, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/168 "2012-01-19T05:37:56Z")
1. FWIW, I distinctly hear “bl” and then “ah” like in, well, [del]black[/del] back. Ah well. 2. Second Stone is the new holder of the Gonzomax Crown and recipient of Doper Most Likely to Try to Inseminate an Electrical Outlet award. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/169 "2013-01-07T03:30:28Z")
> [@Great\_Antibob](#): > > The gun nuts went completely crazy when Obama got elected (he’s going to take our guns, apparently). At least here in Houston, it was difficult to find 9mm ammunition for months. My friends have told me .45 ammo was also difficult to find. > > I wasn’t worried about weapons being confiscated, though, and not because you’d probably have to kill every Texan to do it. > > But when the likes of Rick Perry and Rick Santorum started getting major airplay, I seriously thought about getting another shotgun. Maybe they wouldn’t cause the end of the world, but I could totally see them creating a country where I’d need to defend myself with firearms. > > The irony of rushing out to buy guns because a right-wing nutjob is elected was not lost on me. As a pro-gun person (perhaps even a gun nut) I would heartily approve of this; that’s exactly how it’s supposed to work. Right-wing nut jobs still have enough double-think to realize that persecuting well-armed minorities isn’t a good idea. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/170 "2013-01-07T18:14:37Z")
I’d be a gun nut, too, if there were zombies involved… ---
**Author:** ![gamerunknown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6bbea6/32.png) [@gamerunknown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gamerunknown)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/171 "2013-01-07T19:22:07Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > Lies and distortions are unnecessary and counterproductive in discussing why this piece of garbage is unfit for any kind of elective office down to and particularly including dog catcher. I think he’s disqualified himself from man on dog already. > [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > Santorum was giving a speech about _straight economics._ No social policy, no morals issues, and certainly no racial issues. Straight economics. Why on earth would he, out of nowhere, throw in a statement about “black people”? I’m not going to defend the “black” hypothesis, but it would be totally consistent with the Southern strategy: > [@Atwater](#): > > : You start out in 1954 by saying, “Nigger, nigger, nigger.” By 1968 you can’t say “nigger” — that hurts you. Backfires. So you say stuff like forced busing, states’ rights and all that stuff. You’re getting so abstract now you’re talking about cutting taxes, and all these things you’re talking about are totally economic things and a byproduct of them is blacks get hurt worse than whites. And subconsciously maybe that is part of it. I’m not saying that. But I’m saying that if it is getting that abstract, and that coded, that we are doing away with the racial problem one way or the other. You follow me — because obviously sitting around saying, “We want to cut this,” is much more abstract than even the busing thing, and a hell of a lot more abstract than “Nigger, nigger.” ---
**Author:** ![ElvisL1ves](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5daacb/32.png) [@ElvisL1ves](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElvisL1ves)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/172 "2013-01-07T19:30:49Z")
> [@digs](#): > > I’d be a gun nut, too, if there were zombies involved… I’d reach for a flamethrower first - guns would just punch holes in 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484/173 "2013-01-07T22:23:56Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > I’d reach for a flamethrower first - guns would just punch holes in 'em. [hijack]Zombies aren’t afraid of fire, don’t feel pain when burned, and keep moving until their limbs are cooked through. A flame thrower just turns a zombie attacking you into a flaming zombie attacking you.[/hijack] [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/2012-nominees-for-the-ballsiest-excuse-of-the-year/608484.md?page=8)