# 24: Season 5: Episode 15 (9:00pm - 10:00pm) - OPEN SPOILERS **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 27, 2006, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163 "2006-03-27T22:33:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/81 "2006-03-28T22:01:35Z")
> [@The Big Cheese](#): > > I loved the scene where Jack is running and the gas is exploding just behind him. I was laughing my head off. I still am. “…and now, for my impression of the _Millennium Falcon_ from the end of _RotJ_.” Optional: Lando: “Yaaaaaaahaaaaaaa!” ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/82 "2006-03-28T22:23:38Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > Okay, but we can’t read your mind. You understand that, right? So how about you either tell us, or don’t bring it up next time? I’m not real fond of this whole “posting to say I refuse to post” thing. Calm down, fella. No need to go ballistic over such a little thing. Certain things are best left to the imagination, and some posters ( **Monstre** , for example) have proven themselves to have fertile imaginations indeed. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/83 "2006-03-28T22:25:44Z")
> [@Omniscient](#): > > The Hobbit’s sister’s boyfriend…_Crack_ Bauer. Actually, I was just about to suggest that one for Hobbit-Lynn’s sister. ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/84 "2006-03-28T22:42:15Z")
> [@JThunder](#): > > Actually, I was just about to suggest that one for Hobbit-Lynn’s sister. Me too, but the b/f did the actually ass-kicking, he seems to have earned it. ---
**Author:** ![mack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mack)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/85 "2006-03-28T23:01:52Z")
> [@Monstre](#): > > [Kate Mara](http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0544718/) Ah, yes. Heath Ledger’s daughter in Brokeback Mountain. I thought she looked familiar. > [@The Big Cheese](#): > > I loved the scene where Jack is running and the gas is exploding just behind him. I was laughing my head off. I still am. Meanwhile the explosions blow Bierko into the cop car hard enough to knock him for a loop. I thought Henderson looked pretty chipper after having gone through the worst torture CTU could dish out. Dum-de-dum just another day at the office. Think he’s going to visit his wife in the hospital? Speaking of Spenser - maybe one of the things behind Chloe’s expression after Shari went on about Buchanan touching her shoulder was she was thinking “put a sock in it. This place is the Love Boat”. Chloe slept with Spenser, Jack slept with Nina, Jack slept with Audrey, Audrey slept with Cummings (ick) while Jack was sleeping with Diane (cute), Nina slept with Tony, Tony slept with Michelle, Michelle slept with Buchanan (or did Nina sleep with Buchanan?) Ok, who _didn’t_ Nina sleep with? Who did I miss? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/86 "2006-03-28T23:40:54Z")
Speaking of Brokeback Mtn, my first thought about the sexual harrassement guy was that he was gay, so: Brokeback Bauer ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 28, 2006, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/87 "2006-03-28T23:50:06Z")
My thnking as to where we’re heading, plot-wise, is the discovery of a massive conspiracy within the government. I missed the first half hour of this week’s episode, but have we yet determined that the Vice President is on the up and up? And there’s still the matter of the people trying to kill the younger Palmer. Why? Everyone knows Jack is alive, he’s not being set up for anything, so what’s the motivation to kill him? He must know something else. Something bigger. And Henderson still thinks he’s working in the best interests of the country. My guess is that there are those in the government who have decided that the president cannot do the job (and really, who could blame them?), and that what the U.S. needs now is a good old military coup for ‘security’ reasons. Henderson is in on that, as is the VP and others in the administration. I also wouldn’t be surprised if the next twist is that the SecDef is in on it, and Audrey’s day is going to get worse. Anyway, I have absolutely nothing to back this up, which is why it’s not spoilered. It’s probably completely wrong. But with the nerve gas gone, do they have time to introduce another super-weapon? Or wll the rest of the season start unraveling a huge, very dangerous conspiracy? I kind of hope so. Jack is a lot more fun when he has no idea who to trust. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/88 "2006-03-29T00:01:58Z")
> [@Merijeek](#): > > CTU School of Hacking and Supermodeling I would like to steal this idea with your permission. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/89 "2006-03-29T00:07:13Z")
> [@Sam Stone](#): > > My thnking as to where we’re heading, plot-wise, is the discovery of a massive conspiracy within the government. I missed the first half hour of this week’s episode, but have we yet determined that the Vice President is on the up and up? And there’s still the matter of the people trying to kill the younger Palmer. Why? Everyone knows Jack is alive, he’s not being set up for anything, so what’s the motivation to kill him? He must know something else. Something bigger. Yep, that’s what I was getting at with my earlier post. No, we didn’t learn much more about the VP other than he seems to be behind the guys chacing Palmer’s brother. Sounds shady to me. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/90 "2006-03-29T00:15:48Z")
> [@Sam Stone](#): > > I also wouldn’t be surprised if the next twist is that the SecDef is in on it, and Audrey’s day is going to get worse. This would be almost as bad a character development as Tony trying to kill a suspect before getting any useful info out of him. Heller is pretty well established as a 100% stand-up guy. ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/91 "2006-03-29T01:48:05Z")
But if he’s really, truly convinced that what he’s doing is right for the country? ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/92 "2006-03-29T02:33:17Z")
> [@Monstre](#): > > Speaking of the chopper… Jack told the pilot to “stay right here”. Think he did that? I mean, the whole place did start exploding, so that probably didn’t become the best spot to hover… Hey…_Jack Bauer_ told him to stay right there, OK? ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/93 "2006-03-29T03:13:08Z")
I know I’m late to the game (just finished watching it because I fell asleep early last night), but this was one of the better episodes this season. Jack’s conversation with Collette was absolutely brilliant. And even though you could see a good cliff hanger was coming from a mile away, it still impressed. Well done, 24. “Hack Bauer” is the funniest thing I’ve seen all week, by the way. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/94 "2006-03-29T03:28:31Z")
You guys been watching President Palmer on _The Unit?_ These guys make Jack look…normal. ---
**Author:** ![annieclaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b5a626/32.png) [@annieclaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/annieclaus)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/95 "2006-03-29T04:17:40Z")
> [@athelas](#): > > My guess is that Audrey is innocent, if only because they can’t kill off _that_ many core characters. ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY is predicting that Audrey will not live out the day (because Kim Raver has a role in another show)! ---
**Author:** ![annieclaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b5a626/32.png) [@annieclaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/annieclaus)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/96 "2006-03-29T04:22:27Z")
> [@ChuckForbin](#): > > Did anyone else notice that this week the clock matched the actual real time ? That is, it shows 9:16 and that was the real time. I wonder how often that happens. > > Sorry, all I got. Ummm, not in the Central time zone. (We get 24 at 8pm, so last week our times matched.) ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/97 "2006-03-29T04:25:20Z")
> [@annieclaus](#): > > ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY is predicting that Audrey will not live out the day (because Kim Raver has a role in another show)! Wish that had been spoilered…but interesting nonetheless. ---
**Author:** ![annieclaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b5a626/32.png) [@annieclaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/annieclaus)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/98 "2006-03-29T04:26:50Z")
> [@Merijeek](#): > > Oh yeah, something I’d meant to ask. > > Robocop was listed in the credits, but I don’t remember seeing him anywhere. Anyone? Anyone? He’s Henderson. And he was on briefly, talking on the phone with henchmen on the Western White House compound, telling them to find Wayne Palmer and neutralize him. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/99 "2006-03-29T05:45:44Z")
Okay, so we’ve got the following: **Team CTU** , and the ones who most deserve to have a nickname: Curtis: **Black Bauer** Chloe: **Hack Bauer** Edgar: **Snack Bauer** Michelle: **Flack Bauer** (Seems like a bit of a stretch to me, though.) **Ancillary characters** : Kim: **Rack Bauer** , **Stacked Bauer** or **Trap Bauer** Shari: **Whacked Bauer** Miles: **Mack Bauer** or (based purely on Mr. Mace’s speculation) **Brokeback Bauer** Barry: **Quack Bauer** **One-shot or otherwise minor characters** : Spenser: **Shack Bauer** (Um, why? I think this more accurately describs the survivalist from Season One.) Jenny McGill or her druggie boyfriend: **Crack Bauer** ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2006, 6:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163/100 "2006-03-29T06:04:57Z")
> [@JThunder](#): > > Spenser: **Shack Bauer** (Um, why? I think this more accurately describs the survivalist from Season One.) Shack, as is hook-up, sex, booty call, horizontal mambo. Spence tapped Hack Bauer’s kiester. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/24-season-5-episode-15-9-00pm-10-00pm-open-spoilers/350163.md?page=6)