# 25 years on the SDMB, and I still don't know the secret handshake **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 19, 2025, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088 "2025-07-19T20:35:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/21 "2025-07-20T02:50:08Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > Whatever it is, you should put it down, back away from it slowly, and ~~take a long nap~~ **blow it in place (BIP it).** FTFY. > [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I was all set to send you some start up cash. Oh, _ **do not** _ let that stop you! Tripler GoAheadAndFundMe dot Trip. ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/22 "2025-07-20T03:17:50Z")
Moderating: > [@Tripler](#): > > FTFY. Altering someone’s quote is a no-no. As a 25-er, you should know this. The rule: > **Quote Box** – Do not modify another poster’s words inside the quote box. For SDMB posters, the quote must be accurate, whether displayed using [QUOTE] tags or ordinary quotation marks. Normal editorial rules apply: that is, you may indicate omitted portions of a quote by the use of ellipses “…” or devices such as [snip]. You may add text to clarify a word using square brackets (e.g., “her [the sister’s] friend”), but you may not add editorial comments or edit a quote so as to change the substantive meaning; nor may you substitute text such as “some blather” or “more nonsense” inside the [QUOTE] tags or quotation marks. Don’t do this again, please. ---
**Author:** ![abcdefghij](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/43a26b/32.png) [@abcdefghij](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/abcdefghij)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/23 "2025-07-20T03:23:24Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > And I am **not** yelling this in an airport I get hassled there enough, TYVM. . . Maybe stop showing that picture at TSA? ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/24 "2025-07-20T04:40:10Z")
> [@Aspenglow](#): > > Don’t do this again, please. Whoa! Sorry . . . I genuinely missed that part. > [@abcdefghij](#): > > Maybe stop showing that picture at TSA? Guilty as charged. On the other hand, it’s just so hilariously cute!! Tripler Man, I’m batting a thousand here tonight, ain’t I? ---
**Author:** ![Aspenglow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aspenglow/32/76_2.png) [@Aspenglow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aspenglow)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/25 "2025-07-20T04:46:40Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > Sorry . . . I genuinely missed that part. It happens. I know you’ll never do it again. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/26 "2025-07-20T05:14:22Z")
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#): > > Secret handshake: you pass some mexican fat burners while shaking. and say ‘Gotcha ya!’ Ahem. Those are _Miracle_ Mexican Fat Burners. Yep, I remember Wildest Bill. Coming up on 25 years here. If there’s a secret handshake, I have yet to learn it. ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/27 "2025-07-20T06:17:54Z")
You’re supposed to ask, “Are you a friend of Cecil?” the same as a member of AA might ask “Are you a friend of Bill”? ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 8:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/28 "2025-07-20T08:15:07Z")
Maybe you’re supposed to use the codephrase **14 k of g in a fpd**. ---
**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 8:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/29 "2025-07-20T08:33:01Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Opal was before me. > I always feel slightly guilty using that phrase. > I did toss around the idea of getting it put on a shirt. I knew Opal in real life back in the day. It was surprisingly difficult to work “hi Opal” into the conversation when you were actually face to face and saying hi to Opal. I believe she was selling a “Hi,Opal” T-shirt back in the day. She had a few other T-shirts as well but I don’t remember what was on them. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 9:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/30 "2025-07-20T09:06:31Z")
Aww. Nice story. The good times. ---
**Author:** ![Shoeless](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shoeless/32/7099_2.png) [@Shoeless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shoeless)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/31 "2025-07-20T12:44:02Z")
Isn’t the secret code phrase “I burning your dog”? ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/32 "2025-07-20T12:59:37Z")
If your use of the word “cromulent” elicits _no_ visible reaction, I think you’re about 90+% of the way there. ---
**Author:** ![Reeses\_Monkey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/reeses_monkey/32/2885_2.png) [@Reeses\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeses_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/33 "2025-07-20T14:10:40Z")
Not knowing the Secret Handshake [makes the Baby Jesus cry.](How do YOU make the Baby Jesus cry? - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board [How do YOU make the Baby Jesus cry? - #21 by Cleophus - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board](https://share.google/CDOdRFNIUyvyqtsGb)) ---
**Author:** ![Reeses\_Monkey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/reeses_monkey/32/2885_2.png) [@Reeses\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeses_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/34 "2025-07-20T14:11:13Z")
I have no idea how that got screwed up ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/35 "2025-07-20T15:26:49Z")
A t-shirt with “ ~~never~~ _always_ trust a Cecil” would signal to the nexus of The Crown watchers/dopers. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/36 "2025-07-20T15:42:15Z")
Before learning the Secret Handshake Of Cecil, you must be **Initiated**. BRING FORTH THE GOAT AND THE SQUID! ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/37 "2025-07-20T16:32:46Z")
NO! Not The Squid! I still have tentacle scars on my… ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/38 "2025-07-20T17:10:16Z")
> [@needscoffee](#): > > You’re supposed to ask, “Are you a friend of Cecil?” the same as a member of AA might ask “Are you a friend of Bill”? > [@GuanoLad](#): > > Maybe you’re supposed to use the codephrase **14 k of g in a fpd**. > [@Shoeless](#): > > Isn’t the secret code phrase “I burning your dog”? > [@DavidNRockies](#): > > If your use of the word “cromulent” elicits _no_ visible reaction, I think you’re about 90+% of the way there I have frequently dropped references to “1920s style Death Rays” at the office, always to crickets. I wonder if I have to step up the game with a tagline about visiting the Marinara Trench, only once, in the 60s. Tripler I always get the SDMB meme confused . . . was the meme “Mariana” or “Marinara?” ---
**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/39 "2025-07-20T17:33:41Z")
I’m still the only one who spread the word about 1920s Style Death Rays. Great article. Terrible font choices. > **[1920's Style Death Rays | Flying Cars and Food Pills](https://www.flyingcarsandfoodpills.com/1920s-style-death-rays)** > > Harry Grindell Matthews said he invented a working death ray. Who did he kill? I’m pretty sure the Marinara Trench is part of the mythology of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, though. ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2025, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088/40 "2025-07-20T17:39:28Z")
> [@Tripler](#): > > We do have _standards_ What are these “standards” of which you speak? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/25-years-on-the-sdmb-and-i-still-dont-know-the-secret-handshake/1021088.md?page=3)