# 5 women accuse Louis CK of sexual misconduct

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [November 9, 2017, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152 "2017-11-09T22:27:49Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 14

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**Author:** ![Karol\_Lewis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/919ad9/32.png) [@Karol\_Lewis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Karol_Lewis)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/261 "2017-11-12T00:06:14Z")

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Asking someone for a sexual interaction (assuming that they are a legal age and are mental capable of making rational decisions) is not bad or wrong.

> [@Kimstu](#):
>
> Where in any of this account are you seeing any accusation that anyone was “trying to hurt anyone”? AFAICT none of the female comedians in question claimed that Louis CK was actually trying to hurt them.
> 
> They’re simply saying that he behaved inappropriately to them.

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**Author:** ![Karol\_Lewis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/919ad9/32.png) [@Karol\_Lewis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Karol_Lewis)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/262 "2017-11-12T00:08:22Z")

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Sure I do, You ask. they other person indicates yes or no (weather verbally or non verbally) and you take appropriate action after that.

> [@Kimstu](#):
>
> Wow, you **really** don’t understand how consensual sex works.

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**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/263 "2017-11-12T00:10:19Z")

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Wheee, back on the merry-go-round.

Like I said, at least Louis CK can take some comfort in knowing that he’s got fans out there making him look not so bad by comparison.

And elsewhere in the rather threadbare silver lining department, someday Louis CK might be able to get some very good material out of making fun of the ridiculous “defenses” of his behavior cobbled together by those fans.

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**Author:** ![Karol\_Lewis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/919ad9/32.png) [@Karol\_Lewis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Karol_Lewis)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/264 "2017-11-12T00:14:28Z")

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I am not trying to defend him, nor am I a fan actually.

I am just tired of us women throwing around the “sexual misconduct” thing. This was not sexual misconduct and it takes away from the real predators. This was a weird evening where both sides obviously were not clear on the outcome they were expecting.

And it is disgusting that he loses his livelihood because of misguided social justice warriors.

> [@Kimstu](#):
>
> Wheee, back on the merry-go-round.
> 
> Like I said, at least Louis CK can take some comfort in knowing that he’s got fans out there making him look not so bad by comparison.
> 
> And elsewhere in the rather threadbare silver lining department, someday Louis CK might be able to get some very good material out of making fun of the ridiculous “defenses” of his behavior cobbled together by those fans.

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**Author:** ![Karol\_Lewis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/919ad9/32.png) [@Karol\_Lewis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Karol_Lewis)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/265 "2017-11-12T00:20:45Z")

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How is a man ever supposed to know if a girl is interested if they don’t indicate one way or the other.

There are so many women who say “I wanted to have sex with him. i sent him all the signals but he apparently missed them all”

No, he just didn’t want to get labeled as a sexual deviant. Cause guess what “signals” are not a good way to indicate if you do or do not want to engage in adult actions.

> [@Kimstu](#):
>
> Wheee, back on the merry-go-round.
> 
> Like I said, at least Louis CK can take some comfort in knowing that he’s got fans out there making him look not so bad by comparison.
> 
> And elsewhere in the rather threadbare silver lining department, someday Louis CK might be able to get some very good material out of making fun of the ridiculous “defenses” of his behavior cobbled together by those fans.

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**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/266 "2017-11-12T01:08:50Z")

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A successful comedian or actor’s hotel room looks [like this](http://embassysuites3.hilton.com/resources/media/es/en_US/img/shared/carousel/main/ES_livingroom2_2.jpg), not [like this](https://images.trvl-media.com/hotels/4000000/3560000/3550600/3550511/bbd424e5_z.jpg). It’s their office, their base of operations, their living quarters, not their seedy sex shack.

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**Author:** ![Karol\_Lewis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/919ad9/32.png) [@Karol\_Lewis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Karol_Lewis)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/267 "2017-11-12T01:10:40Z")

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Doesn’t mean people should go to a strangers private location.

> [@GuanoLad](#):
>
> A successful comedian or actor’s hotel room looks [like this](http://embassysuites3.hilton.com/resources/media/es/en_US/img/shared/carousel/main/ES_livingroom2_2.jpg), not [like this](https://images.trvl-media.com/hotels/4000000/3560000/3550600/3550511/bbd424e5_z.jpg). It’s their office, their base of operations, their living quarters, not their seedy sex shack.

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**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/268 "2017-11-12T03:01:56Z")

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I think Louis apology was intended to give enough cover to his aging, white, male, bro fan base to convince themselves they could keep watching him without having to confront some uncomfortable truths about themselves. Mission accomplished.

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**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/269 "2017-11-12T03:49:22Z")

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> [@madmonk28](#):
>
> I think Louis apology was intended to give enough cover to his aging, white, male, bro fan base to convince themselves they could keep watching him without having to confront some uncomfortable truths about themselves. Mission accomplished.

That is a painful little insight right there.

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**Author:** ![Peanuthead](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peanuthead/32/360_2.png) [@Peanuthead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peanuthead)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/270 "2017-11-12T04:04:51Z")

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Now I know what the CK stands for. Louie **C** hic **K** en **C** ho **K** er.

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**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/271 "2017-11-12T05:13:12Z")

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> [@Spice\_Weasel](#):
>
> That is a painful little insight right there.

And I think that is setting things up where literally no one can possibly ever apologize. His apology comes off as sincere, albeit one he was hoping to avoid having to give. He has apologized to all of them privately. And the reason he gave makes 100% sense for what he did. He did ask, and they didn’t say no, so he thought it was okay.

This is 100% the type of behavior I could see happening before the “affirmative consent” concept became big. It’s precisely why we need to teach “yes means yes” instead of “no means no.”

Do I have any problems with this hurting his career and stuff? No. Will I find it hard to listen to his stuff now? Yes. But presuming that it’s just a fake apology? That would imply no apology should ever be believed as real.

Barring subsequent behavior that makes me doubt it, I believe his apology. Am I some sort of bro who is looking for an excuse to keep listening to his stuff? Hardly. For one thing, I don’t plan on listening to his comedy for a long while after this. For another, I honestly see nothing “bro” about his comedy. The stuff I listened to, at least, came across as pro-feminist, pro-SJW, and rather anti-toxic-masculinity.

He still deserves what’s happening to him. But, if he’s faking that apology, then he’s a far, far better actor than I’ve ever given him credit for. Better than anyone else who has been caught in any sexual thing.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/272 "2017-11-12T05:20:13Z")

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I was more responding to the “bros who don’t want to face uncomfortable truths” than his apology per se. I think his apology is better than average, but it’s also like… So what? The true test of remorse is changed behavior, and that takes time.

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**Author:** ![Chisquirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6bbea6/32.png) [@Chisquirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chisquirrel)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/273 "2017-11-12T05:41:12Z")

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nm

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/274 "2017-11-12T09:46:01Z")

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Yeah, the apology may be sincere; although I have a hard time accepting that he just now learned not to pull out his dick in front of people. But so what if it is sincere? That’s one step and it doesn’t mean that 72hours later we have to completely embrace him again. He can be remorseful and still lose his career, let’s not forget that his management team tried to suppress this story and women felt that their careers would suffer if they came forward, sometimes a thing is so shitty that an apology can’t undo it.

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**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/275 "2017-11-12T12:14:54Z")

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> [@BigT](#):
>
> And I think that is setting things up where literally no one can possibly ever apologize. His apology comes off as sincere, albeit one he was hoping to avoid having to give.

You know what would have made his apology seem even more sincere? Giving it several years ago, when it first came out that women were freaked out by his behavior, instead of only after crackerjack reporting left no doubt what he’d done. He spent years dismissing and pooh-poohing the rumors. Apologizing only once you’re caught dead to rights makes the apology ring a little hollow.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/276 "2017-11-12T12:58:50Z")

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> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> Apologizing only once you’re caught dead to rights makes the apology ring a little hollow.

Yep. All these people, the only thing they are sorry for is getting caught.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/277 "2017-11-12T14:58:17Z")

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> [@BigT](#):
>
> His apology comes off as sincere, albeit one he was hoping to avoid having to give.

I’m sorry, I gotta come back to this line. How the hell does this make sense? If you don’t want to apologize, if you’re hoping you don’t have to apologize, and if you only apologize when it’s an apology you “hav[e] to give,” your apology is not sincere.

If you hope you don’t have to give an apology, that’s a hope you have before you do the misdeed. I hope to god I never have to apologize to anyone for running over their cat; I have that hope **because I’ve never run over anyone’s cat**. If some day I run over their cat, either I’ll go ahead and apologize without waiting to be caught, or my apology won’t be sincere.

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**Author:** ![up\_the\_junction](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f1d935/32.png) [@up\_the\_junction](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/up_the_junction)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/278 "2017-11-12T15:24:02Z")

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He wasn’t “caught”.

And just to reiterate, he didn’t sexually harass, he didn’t harass, he did nothing criminal. He did nothing inappropriate in the company of a lone woman.

We seem to be in a world of pressured non-employees, and struggling to identify exactly what that means.

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**Author:** ![bobot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bobot/32/21622_2.png) [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/279 "2017-11-12T15:45:18Z")

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> [@up\_the\_junction](#):
>
> …
> 
> And just to reiterate, he didn’t sexually harass, …

Oh, then we must have heard different stories. What did you hear?

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**Author:** ![up\_the\_junction](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f1d935/32.png) [@up\_the\_junction](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/up_the_junction)\
**Post date:** [November 12, 2017, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/5-women-accuse-louis-ck-of-sexual-misconduct/801152/280 "2017-11-12T15:51:09Z")

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I heard there were no criminal charges.

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