# 83 year old grandmother does the three-story beer bong. Go Granny! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 4, 2005, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973 "2005-12-04T02:34:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![danceswithcats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/9e8a1a/32.png) [@danceswithcats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/danceswithcats)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2005, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/1 "2005-12-04T02:34:22Z")
Grandma decided to [get in the spirit](http://www.michigandaily.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2005/12/01/438eb39ac3f51?in_archive=1)- she must have been hell at keggers when younger! šŸ†’ ---
**Author:** ![KGS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/90ced4/32.png) [@KGS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KGS)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2005, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/2 "2005-12-04T03:11:50Z")
Sheeshā€¦kids todayā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![JustAnotherGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/58f4c7/32.png) [@JustAnotherGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JustAnotherGeek)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2005, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/3 "2005-12-04T03:38:22Z")
[size = 5]Go GRANDMA![/size] I just spent the last 15 minutes laughing so hard I cried! Thanks, I needed that link. ---
**Author:** ![lonesome\_loser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c68b51/32.png) [@lonesome\_loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lonesome_loser)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2005, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/4 "2005-12-04T04:04:39Z")
My kind of granny! ---
**Author:** ![KRC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/45deac/32.png) [@KRC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KRC)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2005, 6:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/5 "2005-12-04T06:53:35Z")
My unfortunately deceased Grandfather would have admired her. ---
**Author:** ![Marlitharn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/779978/32.png) [@Marlitharn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marlitharn)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2005, 8:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/6 "2005-12-04T08:30:32Z")
That is _so_ the kind of old lady Iā€™d like to be somedayā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2005, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/7 "2005-12-04T19:28:22Z")
Go Blue! ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/8 "2005-12-05T07:08:44Z")
Okay. color me confused. What exactly is a beer ā€œbongā€?? Because back in my day, bongs were used to smoke pot (and I live in Alaska, back then, it was LEGAL, yup!!). So what is this supposed bong then? ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Who](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Doctor\_Who](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Who)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 7:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/9 "2005-12-05T07:15:13Z")
> [@CanvasShoes](#): > > Okay. color me confused. What exactly is a beer ā€œbongā€?? Because back in my day, bongs were used to smoke pot (and I live in Alaska, back then, it was LEGAL, yup!!). > > So what is this supposed bong then? Itā€™s a funnel for ramming beer down your throat. It can be any length, but this one was really long (3 stories) - so it must have held lots of beer. Procedure: You plug one end with your thumb, and your buddies pour beer in. They wipe the top with nose-grease to get rid of the head, and then you stick your tongue in the end. Remove tongue and beer shoots down your throat - assuming you donā€™t try to ā€œdrinkā€ it - and remember to just open your throat. It takes talent and practice to do well. - Peter Wiggen ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Who](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Doctor\_Who](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Who)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/10 "2005-12-05T07:19:07Z")
And on reflection I forgot something! :smack: We always called it funnelling. This beer ā€œbongā€ terminology has really come on strong lately - I _think_ itā€™s because there was a company manufacturing beer funnels under the label ā€œBeer Bong.ā€ Hereā€™s a pic of a [beer funnel.](http://www.angelfire.com/fl/beerfunnels/beerfunnels.html) Note that this one is pretty fancy and has a on/off valve. Confusingly, there is also another product called a beer bong. The way it works it you slap it over your bottle or can or whatever, and it has a tube that lets air in. Then when you turn it up, the beer can flow quickly into your mouth. Hereā€™s a [pic.](http://www.epartyunlimited.com/bottle-beer-bong.html) We used to do this by cutting a small hole as the base of the beer can, but thatā€™s a whole nother shebang. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/11 "2005-12-05T07:26:37Z")
> [@PeterWiggen](#): > > And on reflection I forgot something! :smack: > > We always called it funnelling. This beer ā€œbongā€ terminology has really come on strong lately - I _think_ itā€™s because there was a company manufacturing beer funnels under the label ā€œBeer Bong.ā€ Hereā€™s a pic of a [beer funnel.](http://www.angelfire.com/fl/beerfunnels/beerfunnels.html) Note that this one is pretty fancy and has a on/off valve. > > Confusingly, there is also another product called a beer bong. The way it works it you slap it over your bottle or can or whatever, and it has a tube that lets air in. Then when you turn it up, the beer can flow quickly into your mouth. Hereā€™s a [pic.](http://www.epartyunlimited.com/bottle-beer-bong.html) > > We used to do this by cutting a small hole as the base of the beer can, but thatā€™s a whole nother shebang. Strangeā€¦ Iā€™m guessing they hijacked the tag ā€œbongā€ because of its ancient and somewhat illicit drug connotations? Because if I remember right, the old fashioned kind of bong, was also hijacked from the old turkish style pipe tobacco smoking rigs, sort of like a Hooka (or something like thatā€¦tooka??? Pooka? not wait, thatā€™s a ghost horse). It has a hollow ā€œbodyā€ for filling with beer, water or wine (NOT hard alcohol, TRUST me, I saw a guy lose some eyebrows that way once), and a small stem that comes off of the main body, the smoke sort of ā€œsnorkelsā€ through the liquid, cooling and supposedly allowing you to inhale more of it. Generally pot bongs were for one hit, you had to sort of fire them on and off as you were inhaling to keep them going for the entire hit. And remember, it was LEGAL back then! ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/12 "2005-12-05T13:42:17Z")
I first heard of beer bongs in about 1983 in South Jersey, and spent the summer doing them. It wasnā€™t until the end of summer after a softball game, when one guy invited people back to his place to do bongs, that I heard the term ā€˜bongā€™ associated with smoking pot. There I was, thinking we were going to spend the afternoon chugging beer. Imagine my surprise when I showed up and everyone was sitting around getting baked. Beer bongs didnā€™t seem nearly as fun after that day. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/13 "2005-12-05T14:45:40Z")
_Dear Retirement Community Activities Director,_ ---
**Author:** ![audiobottle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc8723/32.png) [@audiobottle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/audiobottle)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/14 "2005-12-05T15:05:07Z")
Hey! Thatā€™s my alma mater! My friend did a three story beer bong on the way to a football game one day. By halftime he decided he wanted to go outside. Apparently he was woken up some time later by a police officer asking him if he was okay. I canā€™t even imagine what Granny must have felt like. Man I miss Ann Arbor. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/15 "2005-12-05T15:53:40Z")
> [@danceswithcats](#): > > Grandma decided to [get in the spirit](http://www.michigandaily.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2005/12/01/438eb39ac3f51?in_archive=1)- she must have been hell at keggers when younger! šŸ†’ How! Incredibly! Frigging! Stupid! Can! Someone! Get? ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/16 "2005-12-05T16:21:29Z")
> [@PeterWiggen](#): > > ā€¦snipā€¦ > We used to do this by cutting a small hole as the base of the beer can, but thatā€™s a whole nother shebang. We used to do that and call it shotgunning. I donā€™t where the term came from. BTW: **CanvasShoes** most famous Pooka was a 7ā€™ tall invisible rabbit named [Harvey](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0042546/). Jim ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/17 "2005-12-05T16:23:33Z")
> [@audiobottle](#): > > Hey! Thatā€™s my alma mater! My friend did a three story beer bong on the way to a football game one day. By halftime he decided he wanted to go outside. Apparently he was woken up some time later by a police officer asking him if he was okay. I canā€™t even imagine what Granny must have felt like. Man I miss Ann Arbor. Iā€™m guessing it took more than one three-story beer bong to put your friend in that state. The story said granny only did a 12-oz. bong, which really isnā€™t that bad, but that the bongmeisters normally put in two 16-oz. beers for people to chug. Now, I like to think that back in the day I was something of a beer-bong expert, but I donā€™t think I have done, could do, or would want to try 32 ounces of beer in a bong. Yikes! ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2005, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/83-year-old-grandmother-does-the-three-story-beer-bong-go-granny/333973/18 "2005-12-05T16:32:04Z")
Youā€™re my girl, [Blue](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0302886/)!