# \_Enterprise!\_ **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 24, 2003, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711 "2003-07-24T20:28:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2003, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/61 "2003-07-30T21:03:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Cervaise \* > Psst, **tracer** — it’s a Quantum Leap reference. That’s that other show that had Captain Archer on it, right? Darn it, I hate it when other shows steal characters from _Enterprise._ – **tracer** , wondering if T’Pol will be around when the Autopilot is deflating… ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/62 "2003-07-31T16:49:27Z")
A new title just came to mind. _Enterprise Pie_. Gives a whole new meaning to “Where no man has gone before.” ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/63 "2003-07-31T16:55:59Z")
A new title just came to mind. _Enterprise Pie_. Gives a whole new meaning to “Where no man has gone before.” ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/64 "2003-07-31T18:56:58Z")
I always thought “Where No Man Has Gone Before” was a description of a women’s restroom toilet. ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/65 "2003-07-31T20:07:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by photopat \* > \*\*A new title just came to mind. > > _Enterprise Pie_. > > Gives a whole new meaning to “Where no man has gone before.” \*\* “And one time, at band camp, I stuck the phaser up my…” :eek: ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/66 "2003-07-31T20:50:34Z")
Just don’t pull the trigger when the phaser’s stuck there. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/67 "2003-08-01T00:33:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by tracer \* > \*\*I always thought “Where No Man Has Gone Before” was a description of a women’s restroom toilet. \*\* That’s not true, why many times I’ve gon— uh, nevermind! Speed 3: Warp Control Mad Bomber Tellarite: If you go below Warp 5, you will explode! Archer: But this ship can go warp 5 for extended periods, dude. Mad Bomber Tellarite: Uh, uh…did i mention i’m Dennis Hopper? Archer: Whoa! ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/68 "2003-08-01T01:07:21Z")
Since we’ve moved off into other movie spoof territory, how about **National Lampoon’s Enterprise**? (a la **Animal House** )? Travis (dejectedly): I can’t believe I threw up in front of Captain Archer. Hoshi: Face it, Travis: You threw up _on_Captain Archer. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/69 "2003-08-01T19:26:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by vivalostwages \* > how about **National Lampoon’s Enterprise**? (a la **Animal House** )? _[T’Pol crashes through the window and lands on my bed]_ ME: “Thank you, God!” ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 10:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/70 "2003-08-01T22:13:07Z")
Reed: “Over? Did you say ‘over’? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Xindi attacked Pearl Harbor?” Travis: “The Xindi?” Trip: “Fergit it; he’s rollin’.” ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/71 "2003-08-01T22:28:48Z")
Vulcan Ambassador: Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, Archer. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/72 "2003-08-01T22:30:03Z")
“And did Galupa think that the Ulus were too ugly to save?” ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/73 "2003-08-02T00:50:32Z")
[Three Nausicans come to the table that Quantum, Tripp, and Malcolm are sitting at with their dates Hoshi, T’Pol, and Travis in a dress. They take the table and say…] “We wanna dance with yo dates.” [Quantum, Tripp, and Malcolm make haste to the door and then jump in their shuttle craft and peel out of the parking lot] ---
**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/74 "2003-08-02T01:54:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by NoClueBoy \* > \*\*[Three Nausicans come to the table that Quantum, Tripp, and Malcolm are sitting at with their dates Hoshi, T’Pol, and Travis in a dress. They take the table and say…] > “We wanna dance with yo dates.” > > [Quantum, Tripp, and Malcolm make haste to the door and then jump in their shuttle craft and peel out of the parking lot] \*\* Where Dr. Flox and [that nameless crewmember] are hot and heavy in the back seat. (Gratuitous tit-shot to boost ratings!) ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 2:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/75 "2003-08-02T02:51:59Z")
Well, since this thread seems to have degenerated from it’s original purpose, let me just say: phaser-cutting phasers! ---
**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/76 "2003-08-02T03:45:34Z")
Since we’re on tangents galore… what about “National Lampoon” et al.? John Astin : What was the first name of the 35th President of the United States? T’pol (to Archer): John? Astin: YOU’RE RIGHT! Griswold’s win! T’pol: I’m glad we decided to be pigs, John! ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/77 "2003-08-02T04:19:25Z")
Hoshi (watching Trip feed his face and talk with his mouth full): “That boy is a P-I-G \*pig[i/]!” ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2003, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/78 "2003-08-02T04:20:45Z")
_pig_. Dammit. * * * Crewman Daniels to Archer, after putting him through several time vortices: “My advice to you is to start drinking heavily.” ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2003, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/79 "2003-08-07T01:50:45Z")
ARCHER: “We have clearance, Travis.” TRAVIS: “Roger, Archer. What’s our vector, Tucker?” (Hmmm … just doesn’t have the same ring to it…) ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2004, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711/80 "2004-03-23T23:10:04Z")
PHLOX: “The survival of everyone on Earth depends on just one thing: finding someone on board who can not only fly this starship, but who **didn’t** have Trellium D for dinner.” _[Lightning flashes. Dramatic chords play. St. Christopher statuette hides its eyes.]_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/_enterprise-_/190711.md?page=5)