# A Canadian flames the whole Canadian Olympic Mess!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922>\
**Category:** The BBQ Pit\
**Created:** [February 14, 2010, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922 "2010-02-14T03:35:12Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Valteron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f17d59/32.png) [@Valteron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valteron)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/1 "2010-02-14T03:35:12Z")

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As a Canadian, I am sick and tired of Canada making an international buffoon of itself at the Olympics, winter and summer alike.

From K.D. Lang looking like a drag-king dyke who had to use her big brother’s suit to the fiasco of the non-functioning apparatus at the lighting of the cauldron-like whatever-it-was, the opening night was an embrarassment.

All right, so Vancouver can’t help the warm weather that is melting the games out from under them. That is just the Universe confirming what a loser country Canada is.

But did you know that Canada has hosted both the summer (Montreal) and winter (Calgary) olympics WITHOUT EVER WINNING A FUCKING GOLD MEDAL??? We have never won a gold on our own soil after hosting 2 olympics. What a loser country! What do we have to do? Hold our own Olympics in which only Canada participates before we win something?

Every Olympics, the corporate sponsors (including fast-food chains whose support for healthy athletes would look nicer if their food was not a major cause of moribund obesity) run ads featuring the wonderful athletes who are going to win for Canada. Like Silken Lauman. Yeah right.

Look, we are one of the richest and most developed nordic countries in the world. We get winter from three to six months a year depending on where you live. We should be harvesting medals for winter sports like an anteater going at an anthill.

So here for the benefit of our athletes is a free public service. Here are media lines you can use after every event.

“It’s no disgrace to lose to a great hockey team like Costa Rica’s”.

“It’s not about winning medals, it’s about competing.”

“Yeah, I would have liked to win a medal, but I’m just grateful to have been part of the Olympics.”

You like those? I have a million more because that’s what I’ve been hearing for decades.

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**Author:** ![gonzomax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e8c25b/32.png) [@gonzomax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gonzomax)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/2 "2010-02-14T03:41:45Z")

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So it is about winning, not competing after all?

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**Author:** ![Valteron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f17d59/32.png) [@Valteron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valteron)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/3 "2010-02-14T03:48:51Z")

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> [@gonzomax](#):
>
> So it is about winning, not competing after all?

Well duuuuh! Why do you think they have three classes of medals, and why do they run up the flag of the country that wins gold? What I have supplied are the losers’ excuses for use after the events.

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**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/4 "2010-02-14T03:55:00Z")

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I did some checking, and as far as the Summer Games go, Canada is the only country not to win any gold medals in a year that they were hosting.

As winter games go, they share the distinction with Yugoslavia (1984)

However, Canada is 16th overall in terms of total gold medals won, with 44. The top three are the US, the Soviet Union (when it existed) and Italy.

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**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/5 "2010-02-14T03:56:48Z")

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With what happened to Nodar Kumaritashvili, everything you mentioned is small potatoes.

Besides, 18-0 for Canada vs. Slovakia. We’ll do it this year, and if not, well we’ll try again next time. 🙂

No biggy.

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**Author:** ![Valteron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f17d59/32.png) [@Valteron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valteron)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/6 "2010-02-14T04:07:45Z")

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> [@Captain\_Amazing](#):
>
> I did some checking, and as far as the Summer Games go, Canada is the only country not to win any gold medals in a year that they were hosting.
> 
> As winter games go, they share the distinction with Yugoslavia (1984)
> 
> However, Canada is 16th overall in terms of total gold medals won, with 44. The top three are the US, the Soviet Union (when it existed) and Italy.

What does that last sentence include? 44 golds at winter and summer combined? Do you have a stat for how we rate in Winter Olympic Golds? For a country of 33 million that is one of the G-8, that has arenas and sports facilities in every town and hamlet, 16th place is pretty shitty.

Let’s face it, we are a loser country.

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**Author:** ![Valteron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f17d59/32.png) [@Valteron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valteron)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/7 "2010-02-14T04:10:29Z")

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> [@FloatyGimpy](#):
>
> With what happened to Nodar Kumaritashvili, everything you mentioned is small potatoes.
> 
> Besides, 18-0 for Canada vs. Slovakia. We’ll do it this year, and if not, well we’ll try again next time. 🙂
> 
> No biggy.

What a Canadian attitude! I have heard that the difference between an American and a Canadian is that when a Canadian comes home with a Bronze, we act like he hung the Moon. When an American does, they say, “Maybe next time you’ll get the Gold”.

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**Author:** ![Raygun99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Raygun99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raygun99)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/8 "2010-02-14T04:10:48Z")

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This is going to be a fun thread to come back to in two weeks.

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**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/9 "2010-02-14T04:14:25Z")

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You’re upset Canada did poorly in 1976 and 1988? Who gives a shit?

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**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/10 "2010-02-14T04:15:49Z")

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> [@Valteron](#):
>
> What a Canadian attitude! I have heard that the difference between an American and a Canadian is that when a Canadian comes home with a Bronze, we act like he hung the Moon. When an American does, they say, “Maybe next time you’ll get the Gold”.

Thank you! I love the Canadian attitude. 🙂

Just don’t insult Terry Fox! 😉

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**Author:** ![Merneith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/57b2e6/32.png) [@Merneith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Merneith)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/11 "2010-02-14T04:19:37Z")

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FWIW, this American thought the opening ceremony was lovely and Canadian champ Patrick Chan is the skater I’m most looking forward to seeing, even though he’s unlikely to beat Evgeny Plushenko.

Also, I like your anthem better than ours, your slam poet and clogging fiddlers were way hipper than anything from Salt Lake City (or Beigjing) and your Mounties are hot.

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**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/12 "2010-02-14T04:21:26Z")

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Curling on home turf. (Well, kind of; curling is actually a Scottish invention, but it’s most popular in Canada.) You guys will get at least one silver.

FWIW, [there’s going to be plenty of Team Canada curling draws on the cable networks in the States](http://www.nbcolympics.com/tv-listings/zone=ET/sport=CU/index.html), so I don’t want to hear the usual “wah wah the Olympics telecasts in the US feature only American teams and athletes and sob stories about blond figure skaters overcoming adversity” garbage. We’re rooting for ya’ … really!

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**Author:** ![Valteron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f17d59/32.png) [@Valteron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valteron)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/13 "2010-02-14T04:22:52Z")

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> [@RickJay](#):
>
> You’re upset Canada did poorly in 1976 and 1988? Who gives a shit?

You just don’t get it, do you? It is not just the 76 and 88 Olympics. It is every damn Olympics I can remember that we had our hopes raised over Silken Lauman, Alexandre Despatie, Brian Orser, etc. They were all touted as gold medal hopes. Every Olympics they tell us to cheer on these wunderkinder and then they come in silver or bronze, or nothing. Now Chales Hamelin tonight failed to place. I am sick and tired of cheering on losers just because they are Canadians, and just because some slick sponsor tells me to support them, with ads about drinking coffee at dawn before hockey practice and being all Canadian about it.

I am sick of being let down by losers!

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**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/14 "2010-02-14T04:26:02Z")

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Look, you guys just got a silver in the women’s moguls! Oh Canada!

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**Author:** ![Raygun99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Raygun99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raygun99)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/15 "2010-02-14T04:27:28Z")

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in 2006, we finished 5th overall in the medal table (ranked by golds) and 3rd overall in medals, ahead of Russia and one medal short of the United States. You don’t know what you’re talking about.

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**Author:** ![BMada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/96bed5/32.png) [@BMada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMada)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/16 "2010-02-14T04:29:09Z")

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> [@Valteron](#):
>
> I am sick of being let down by losers!

why don’t you win Canada a gold medal? wait, you’re too busy typing here to get one…

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**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/17 "2010-02-14T04:29:29Z")

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I rather enjoyed the First Nations stuff, but the wire-fu “flight across the prairies” business left me cold.

And the US just tore another gold away from a Canadian in women’s moguls.

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**Author:** ![Valteron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f17d59/32.png) [@Valteron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valteron)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/18 "2010-02-14T04:33:38Z")

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> [@BMada](#):
>
> why don’t you win Canada a gold medal? wait, you’re too busy typing here to get one…

Why don’t our athletes win a few? The ones who are young enough to be my grandchildren!

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**Author:** ![Valteron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f17d59/32.png) [@Valteron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Valteron)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/19 "2010-02-14T04:34:55Z")

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> [@Raygun99](#):
>
> in 2006, we finished 5th overall in the medal table (ranked by golds) and 3rd overall in medals, ahead of Russia and one medal short of the United States. You don’t know what you’re talking about.

Ever hear about the exceptioin that proves the rule?

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**Author:** ![BMada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/96bed5/32.png) [@BMada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMada)\
**Post date:** [February 14, 2010, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-canadian-flames-the-whole-canadian-olympic-mess/528922/20 "2010-02-14T04:35:12Z")

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then you shoulda won us one in 1976. I blame you for not having a gold medal on our soil.

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