# A Centaur and a Cyclops Walk into a Bar.... finish the joke (Xena reference) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** comedian-jokes\ **Created:** [July 2, 2023, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432 "2023-07-02T01:19:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2023, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/41 "2023-07-04T17:56:00Z")
The bartender pulls the Cyclops aside and says “You weren’t kidding the other day when you told me you knew a guy who’s hung like a horse!” ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2023, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/42 "2023-07-04T20:33:29Z")
Thank you so much! (I only wish I could have come up with some role for the centaur as well…) ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2023, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/43 "2023-07-05T04:08:13Z")
OK, I didn’t get it at first, either, but… Then the bartender says ‘don’t you mean a martini?’ and the Cyclops replies ‘no, those make me double.’ ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2023, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/44 "2023-07-14T00:37:01Z")
The bartender asks the cyclops, “Why do a centaur and a cyclops make good drinking buddies?” The cyclops says, “Well, if i drink too much, I always have a ride home.” Then the centaur says, “And if I overindulge, he can keep an eye out for the cops!” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2023, 4:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/45 "2023-07-26T04:14:31Z")
The Cyclops says “A bottle of your best, Barkeep! But nothing for my friend here; he’s mean when he drinks.” * * * The Centaur sidles up to a hot babe at the bar and whispers “I’m so horny not even the crack of dawn is safe around me!” ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2023, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/46 "2023-07-26T04:23:16Z")
> [@outlierrn](#): > > OK, I didn’t get it at first, either, but… > > Then the bartender says ‘don’t you mean a martini?’ > and the Cyclops replies ‘no, those make me double.’ That, or something very similar, was originated by comedy duo Wayne and Shuster, back in (I think) the 1960s. A guy walks into a bar. “Bartender, I’ll have a martinus, please.” “Don’t you mean a martini?” “No. If I wanted a double, I’d ask for one.” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2023, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/47 "2023-07-26T04:28:19Z")
Shouldn’t the line be “No, those make me _see_ double”? 🤔 ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2023, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/48 "2023-07-26T04:37:25Z")
No, that was the way the line was delivered by Wayne and Shuster. I don’t know if it is correct Latin, but it sure got a lot of laughs on TV. Of course, things get muddled in Dorothy Parker’s famous observation: _I like a martini,_ _But two at the most._ _Three, and I’m under the table,_ _Four and I’m under the host._ Unless you were responding to **outlierrn** , of course. Never mind, I’ll let my post stand anyway. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2023, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/49 "2023-07-26T04:43:58Z")
> [@Spoons](#): > > Unless you were responding to **outlierrn** , of course. Never mind, I’ll let my post stand anyway. 🙂 I was, but that’s okay. 👍 ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2023, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/50 "2023-07-26T04:55:40Z")
The Cyclops and the Centaur are enjoying their drinks when Hippocrates walks in and orders his customary almond daiquiri. The bartender looks in the cabinet and sees he’s out of almonds, so he decides to sneak in a substitute. Hippocrates takes a sip. He frowns and asks the bartender “Is this an almond daiquiri?” The bartender smiles sheepishly and says “No, that’s a hickory daiquiri, Doc.” 🤣 ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2023, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/51 "2023-07-26T05:09:32Z")
You are correct, it should be ‘those make me _see_ double’, which is a joke because, you know, he’s a cyclops. I not saying it’s funny, but it had a better shot if I’d gotten it right. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2023, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/52 "2023-07-28T19:42:34Z")
The Cyclops sidles up to a hot babe at the bar and says “It’s been a long time since I’ve eaten a Greek…” * * * The Centaur sidles up to another hot babe at the bar and says “Chiron’s the name, Greek’s my game!” ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [July 29, 2023, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/53 "2023-07-29T00:37:49Z")
A Centaur and a Cyclops walk into a bar. The bartender says “Well, this is a surprise!” The Cyclops says “How so?” The bartender says “Well, I heard you guys never use the front door when you can get in the back way!” * * * A Centaur and a Cyclops walk into a bar. The bartender says “Well, this is a surprise!” The Cyclops says “How so?” The bartender says “Well, I’ve always heard you need a crowbar to separate the Centaurs from the Cyclops!” ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2023, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/54 "2023-08-02T15:24:48Z")
Bartender says “Our special today is a shot of Canadian rye.” And the Cyclops says “Well, that sounds better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick!” ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2023, 9:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432/55 "2023-11-29T09:11:42Z")
A centaur and a cyclops stagger drunkenly into a bar, which is tended by a guy with a big hump on his back. The bartender says to the Centaur, “You boys look like you’ve had enough.” The Centaur is taken aback. “Good sir, I’ll have you know my friend and I are completely sober!” The bartender rolls his eyes and says, “That’s one I never heard before.” The Cyclops shouts, “Hunchback! Hunchback!” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-centaur-and-a-cyclops-walk-into-a-bar-finish-the-joke-xena-reference/986432.md?page=2)