# A Complete and Carnage Filled Collection of Badass / Bad Men Songs **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 22, 2004, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626 "2004-06-22T13:59:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![capacitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e47774/32.png) [@capacitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/capacitor)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/41 "2004-06-23T04:09:40Z")
“Tom Dooley”, though he was more a coward. Everyone knows about song “Beauty and the Beast” sung by Angela Lansbury, but the boys like me watching that film wants to drink like “Garcon!” ---
**Author:** ![Mehitabel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mehitabel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mehitabel)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/42 "2004-06-23T04:28:17Z")
Irving Berlin has one in ANNIE GET YOUR GUN, it’s even called “I’m a Bad, Bad Man!” “Knew a girl in Omaha, But I ran faster than her Pa! Cain’t go back t’ Omaha, I’m a bad bad man!” OK, it’s not the highlight of the show. Randy Newman has a bunch–‘There’s a Party at My House Tonight’ goes on about the fun and a pretty girl who’s invited, and in the last two lines it becomes apparent he intends to rape her. ‘In Germany Before the War’ is about a real-life serial killer his mother told him about. ‘Guilty’ and ‘Marie’ are about men who know they’re bad, but are trying to be nice. And of course, his musical version of FAUST has tons of great songs for Lucifer, the uber-bad boy. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/43 "2004-06-23T04:37:06Z")
The collected works of Tom Waits and Nick Cave. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/44 "2004-06-23T05:12:17Z")
While somebody already mentionedn _Don’t Mess Around with Jim_, I humbly submit its superiority among bad men songs by being about _two_ very badass men. First Big Jim Walker, a “pool shootin’ son of a gun”, who’s “big and dumb as a man can come and strong as a country hoss”, and furthermore, “when the bad folks all get together at night you know they all call Big Jim boss”. However, comes along a pool-shootin’ boy name of Willie McCoy, who evidently got hustled by Big Jim, and he “come to get [his] money back”. The carnage is such that “when the cuttin’ was done the only part that wasn’t bloody was the soles of the big man’s feet”, and Slim replaces Jim on top of the badass ladder. The moral, of course, is not to hustle people strange to you, even if you do have a two-piece custom pool cue. Indeed. ---
**Author:** ![jinty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dbc845/32.png) [@jinty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jinty)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/45 "2004-06-23T13:18:39Z")
How about some Shane McGowan-era Pogues? **The Old Main Drag** “One evening as I was lying down in Leicester Square I was picked up by the coppers and kicked in the balls Between the metal doors at Vine Street I was beaten and mauled And they ruined my good looks for the old main drag” **The Sickbed of Cuchulainn** “And in the Euston Tavern you screamed it was your shout But they wouldn’t give you service so you kicked the windows out They took you out into the street and kicked you in the brains So you walked back in through a bolted door and did it all again” Knowing Mr McG’s reputation for liking a wee tipple, I think his lyrics aren’t just an affectation, either. ---
**Author:** ![jinty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dbc845/32.png) [@jinty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jinty)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/46 "2004-06-23T13:22:07Z")
> [@Suburban Plankton](#): > > In England, are they called “Zed-Zed Top”? > Probably a stupid question, but I’ve always wondered. No it’s a good question: Zee-Zee Top 99% of the time is the answer. (The other 1% is people pretending to be unknowledgeable, for a joke) ---
**Author:** ![todd33rpm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a5b964/32.png) [@todd33rpm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/todd33rpm)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/47 "2004-06-23T13:35:01Z")
“Voodoo Child (Slight Return)” by Hendrix or Stevie Ray Vaughan, though I lean toward Hendrix. First verse is pretty much the dictionary definition of “badass.” On a lighter note, “Smokin’ In The Boys’ Room” - the Brownsville Station version, if there’s a choice. ---
**Author:** ![bauble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f6c823/32.png) [@bauble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bauble)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/48 "2004-06-24T15:11:28Z")
Since Shel Silverstein’s already been mentioned, how about [Tiger Man McCool](http://www.nassio.com/silverstein/ps.html#winner) ? ---
**Author:** ![Ol\_Gaffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Ol\_Gaffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ol_Gaffer)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/49 "2004-06-24T16:03:24Z")
I thought of another one this morning on my way to work…_John O’Reilly_ by **Charlie Robison**. It is about an Irish immigrant who becomes a boxer in the U.S. “Well I fought in New York City and I fought the Jersey Shore, My gut stayed full of whiskey and my bed stayed full of whores, My right they called a cannonball and my left they called the same, and I left 'em all a’lying half in blood and half in shame.” ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/50 "2004-06-24T18:13:01Z")
> [@capacitor](#): > > Everyone knows about song “Beauty and the Beast” sung by Angela Lansbury, but the boys like me watching that film wants to drink like “Garcon!” I think you mean Gaston. But I agree. ---
**Author:** ![Chastain86](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Chastain86](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chastain86)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/51 "2004-06-24T18:26:32Z")
Surprised nobody’s mentioned Guns N’ Roses yet. I used to love her But I had to kill her I used to love her But I had to kill her I had to put her Six feet under And I can still hear her complain ---
**Author:** ![vl\_mungo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc8723/32.png) [@vl\_mungo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vl_mungo)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/52 "2004-06-24T18:52:29Z")
**Shaft!!!** man… sometimes I wonder about you guys. Also, **Cop Killer** - Body Count **Walk Like A Man** (despite the decidedly non-badass falsetto singing) - The Four Seasons ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/53 "2004-06-24T19:11:59Z")
_Get a Little Dirt on Your Hands_ - Bill Anderson > [@](#): > > Well I reached twenty one and I thought I was a pretty big wheel > Left the country for the city, met a slicker with a shady deal > He said hold up the bank boy and take all the money > And run as fast as you can > The only way you’ll ever get along in this world > Is to get a little dirt on your hands ---
**Author:** ![pesch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pesch/32/4925_2.png) [@pesch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pesch)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/54 "2004-06-24T23:53:42Z")
> [@Shoeless](#): > > Yeah, lots of good Johnny Cash picks. **Sam Hall** from his _“The Man Comes Around”_ album is another good one. Beat me to it. I LOVE that song. Old Sam got caught and he’s on the scaffold: > [@](#): > > Then the Sherriff, he came to; he came to. > Ah, yeah, the Sherriff, he came to; he came to. > The Sherriff, he come to an he said: “Sam, how are you?” > An I said: "Well, Sherriff, how are you, (sung with a sneer that would make Billy Idol turn in his leathers) > “Damn your eyes.” > > My name is Samuel, Samuel. (pronounced long, like “Sam-u-well”) > My name is Samuel, Samuel. > My name is Samuel, an’ I’ll see you all in hell. > An’ I’ll see you all in hell, > Damn your eyes. You could tell this was a man who knew he had nothing left and he was going to go out swinging. Finest kind. ---
**Author:** ![pesch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pesch/32/4925_2.png) [@pesch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pesch)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2004, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/55 "2004-06-24T23:58:06Z")
Eminem’s “'97 Bonnie & Clyde” about a guy who takes his daughter along to dump her mother into the lake: > [@](#): > > And mama said she wants to show how far she can float > And don’t worry about that little boo-boo on her throat > It’s just a little scratch - it don’t hurt, her was eatin > dinner while you were sweepin and spilled ketchup on her shirt > Mama’s messy isn’t she? We’ll let her wash off in the water > and me and you can pway by ourselves, can’t we? I picked up Tori Amos’ version of this. She sings it slow and clear, and hearing it over the speakers late at night at home scared the p\*\*\* out of me. If you can forget that it’s Marshall Mather and treat it as if he was channeling Poe – after all, how different is this from “A Cask of Amontillado” or “The Tell-Tale Heart”? – and I think you may understand where I’m coming from. ---
**Author:** ![Oregon\_sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/50afbb/32.png) [@Oregon\_sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oregon_sunshine)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/56 "2004-06-25T00:53:35Z")
I’m surprised that no one has brought up the relative motherlode of bad-assness: gangsta rap. How about these examples? From NWA’s “F\*\*\* tha Police”… "Lights start flashin behind me But they’re scared of a n\*\*\*\* so they mace me to blind me But that shit don’t work, I just laugh Because it gives em a hint not to step in my path … Smoke any muthaf\*\*\*a that sweats me Or any assho that threatens me I’m a sniper with a hell of a scope Takin out a cop or two, they can’t cope with me" Or, how about this from Tha Dogg Pound’s “I’ma Gangsta” “You thought you had a grip, well we did too That’s why me and the homies decided to come through Whip out the pistol, snatch off his head real quick Bitch n\*\*\*\*, where the f\*\*\* did you stash the grip On some gangsta sh\*\* 'cause gangstas make the world go ‘round Whip out the fo’ pound, dump 'cause he’s moving around I bet he never move again, the next time a motherf\*\*\*er say stay down On the ground, I bet he won’t make a sound” Okay, maybe nobody posted this stuff because of all the censoring for a non-Pit thread. Whew… But you have to admit, they are (verbally, at least) some badass m&#@f%#$! ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 12:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/57 "2004-06-25T00:54:45Z")
> [@vl\_mungo](#): > > **Shaft!!!** > man… sometimes I wonder about you guys. Yeah, we all know that that Shaft is a bad mutha (SHUT YO MOUTH!) but “Theme From Shaft” spends waaaay more time talking about what a lover and sex machine he is. It’s borderline. Deserves an honorable mention, along with “Theme From Fall Guy” and “Theme From Dukes Of Hazzard.” EVERYBODY NOW! “Makin’ their waaaaaAAAAAaaaaay the only way they know hooOoooooow…!” ---
**Author:** ![Askia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/96bed5/32.png) [@Askia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askia)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/58 "2004-06-25T00:57:47Z")
Yeah, gangsta rap! Gheto Boys - Mind Playing Tricks On Me – didn’t I mention this in the OP? ---
**Author:** ![Oregon\_sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/50afbb/32.png) [@Oregon\_sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oregon_sunshine)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/59 "2004-06-25T02:00:13Z")
Oops, sorry! My bad!! 🙂 Geto Boys - I \*loved \* their featured song in _Office Space_… “Damn It Feels Good to Be a Gangsta”… Just perfect. They are pretty bad-ass too! ---
**Author:** ![galen\_ubal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/galen_ubal/32/4440_2.png) [@galen\_ubal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/galen_ubal)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2004, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626/60 "2004-06-25T02:11:01Z")
How about _Behind Blue Eyes_ by The Who. Not loud and boastful, but rather chilling in it’s own way… > [@](#): > > But my dreams are not as empty, > As my conscience seems to be. > I have hours, only lonely > My love is vengeance > That’s never free. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-complete-and-carnage-filled-collection-of-badass-bad-men-songs/251626.md?page=4)