# A crappy start to the day **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 9, 2019, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290 "2019-04-09T17:13:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/1 "2019-04-09T17:13:23Z")
So every morning my dog wakes up about ten minutes before my alarm. He whines to get out of his crate, so I open the door and lounge in bed for a few more minutes. The dog stretches, gets some water, chases the cat and then pesters me for breakfast. This morning he whined to get out so I did, but man it was like I had only slept a few hours, I was still really tired. Just as I glanced at my phone and realized it was 3am, not 6.15, Bartleby let loose with a truly impressive stream of diarrhea. It was like a firehouse of filth and it was everywhere. So I’m on my back porch at 4am hosing down the rug, our comforter, the clothes hamper and then scrubbing the walls, trying not to gag. Now he seems fine. TLDR: I called in sick today. ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/2 "2019-04-09T17:29:40Z")
Keep an eye on ol’ Bartleby. This sort of thing can sometimes be dangerous. Spoilered – not safe for lunch [Spoiler]Two years ago in May, our dog Luna had explosive diarrhea with blood in it. We rushed her to the vet, where she had four more episodes of what appeared to be mostly blood _jetting_ out of her backside about four feet onto the tiles. She was miserable and scared and there was SO MUCH BLOOD. They gave her IV fluids and subcutaneous fluids and plasma and finally hospitalized her with the administration of “canine clotting factor” when her clotting factor failed. She nearly died. Turned out to be a clostridium bacterial infection, most likely picked up by eating contaminated grass a sick animal had pooped in (perhaps weeks before). Clostridium is the same family that produces gas gangrene in wounds – nasty stuff. Fortunately she bounced back quickly – the hospital called the next morning and told us “This is the happiest ‘bleeding to death’ dog we’ve ever met.” When we could joke about it later, I suggested we should have named Luna _Carrie_.[/Spoiler] ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/3 "2019-04-09T17:41:03Z")
Thanks yeah, when our 16 year old Millie had diarrhea, it turned out she had cancer. Bartleby’s a Little over a year old, Friday was the anniversary of when we got him, so he’s due for his annual checkup. He has a penchant for eating crap on the street during his walks, sometimes literal crap, and I bet he ate something disgusting, but I’ll get him checked. Millie was this super chill chow/lab mix and when we got a new dog, I wanted a completely different personality so I wouldn’t compare the two and boy is Bartleby the opposite: he is high energy, not terribly inclined to mind (he prefers not, well you know) and is always ready for getting into something. It must be love, I was on the back porch in my boxers cleaning his ass off at four am while he was trying to chase his own tail. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/4 "2019-04-09T20:25:05Z")
Dogs do EVERYTHING to the max. Including the runs. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/5 "2019-04-09T20:36:30Z")
Yeah, no slow build up at all. I have diarrhea! Now I’m fine! I’m hungry! Let’s play! ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/6 "2019-04-09T20:46:07Z")
I hope Bartleby feels better. I hope you got all the nasty off everything. If you still smell it use a bit diluted vinegar on the hard surfaces. ---
**Author:** ![beowulff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beowulff/32/542_2.png) [@beowulff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beowulff)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/7 "2019-04-09T20:48:29Z")
Have you ever heard the aphorism that “Once a dog eats something that makes him sick, he will never eat that thing again” ? Well, BS. My dog likes to eat other dog’s poop. Or, even better, cat poop. It invariably gives him the most _astonishingly_ stinky diarrhea later. But, that doesn’t seem to deter him for the next time… ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/8 "2019-04-09T21:04:25Z")
My Beagle, thankfully doesn’t eat poop ( surprisingly cause she’ll eat anything else). But if she sees any poop from any animal on our walks, she’ll roll in it. Everytime. She is stinky, so often, her nickname is Pigpen. ---
**Author:** ![P-man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/p-man/32/3606_2.png) [@P-man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/P-man)\ **Post date:** [April 9, 2019, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-crappy-start-to-the-day/832290/9 "2019-04-09T23:50:58Z")
The other night I was lying on the couch when one of the cats took a dump that peeled the paint off the walls. I thought, “there’s no way the dog will eat that, so I can wait a while before I get rid of it.” I thought wrong. I heard Ginger licking the cat box, then she came over to me and put her face next to my nose. It was the worst dog breath I’ve ever smelled.