# A Euro 2004 thread - better late than never....(It's about soccerball)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832>\
**Category:** Cafe Society\
**Created:** [June 11, 2004, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832 "2004-06-11T16:17:08Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 10

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**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/181 "2004-06-23T12:06:52Z")

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> [@Legolamb](#):
>
> Very much so, but it’s nothing new - it was the same during the World Cup too, particularly during Brazil’s matches. There’s definitely a drinking game in there somewhere…
> 
> .

For tonight:

Dutch fan in orange wig - one drink

German fan in comedy Rudy Voller wig and moustache - 1 drink

German fan in lederhosen - two drinks.

Any sighting of comedy cheese (especially blow-up). - finish drink.

Pictures of attractive latvian ladies crying - Open new bottle

Shots of fat men crying (of any nation) - finish bottle.

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**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/182 "2004-06-23T12:22:29Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> Shots of fat men crying (of any nation) - finish bottle.

What night is the Portugal England game on? 😃

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**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/183 "2004-06-23T12:27:48Z")

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It’s either fat men with BIG MOUSTACHES and back-hair crying or fat men with sunburn and rotten dress-sense crying.

Either way - finish bottle!

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**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/184 "2004-06-23T13:29:59Z")

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> [@Vetch](#):
>
> Horst Hrubesch

**Das Ungeheuer!**

Sorry, I just like saying that. Carry on. 😛

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**Author:** ![PookahMacPhellimey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pookahmacphellimey/32/3175_2.png) [@PookahMacPhellimey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PookahMacPhellimey)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/185 "2004-06-23T14:26:25Z")

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More strangeness. The Dutch press report that some Dutch business people based in Prague are offering a million euros for each Czech goal.

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**Author:** ![Arch\_Trout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9f8e36/32.png) [@Arch\_Trout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arch_Trout)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/186 "2004-06-23T14:32:11Z")

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> [@TwistofFate](#):
>
> What night is the Portugal England game on? 😃

Portugal will be beating England on Thursday 24th June, ko 1945 BST.

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**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/187 "2004-06-23T14:35:16Z")

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Hmmmmm…A scotsman and an Irishman hoping England lose.

Nothing like a stereotype now is there?

Poor show chaps. Poor show.

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**Author:** ![Arch\_Trout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9f8e36/32.png) [@Arch\_Trout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arch_Trout)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/188 "2004-06-23T14:53:11Z")

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> [@owlstretchingtime](#):
>
> Hmmmmm…A scotsman and an Irishman hoping England lose.
> 
> Nothing like a stereotype now is there?
> 
> Poor show chaps. Poor show.

Surely we’re allowed to dislike any team we please?

After all the advertisement on ITV for the Germany versus Latvia game had a voiceover that went:

Man 1: So why should I care about Latvia  
Man 2: Because they’re playing the Germans  
Man 1: COME ON LATVIA!

I don’t think any Englishmen complained to the ITC about this advert.

And I don’t think you should complain that I want Portugal to win.  
It’s only because the competition is always better the longer the hosts are in.  
Honest. :dubious:

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**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/189 "2004-06-23T14:57:27Z")

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> [@owlstretchingtime](#):
>
> Hmmmmm…A scotsman and an Irishman hoping England lose.
> 
> Nothing like a stereotype now is there?
> 
> Poor show chaps. Poor show.

Irony meter exploding!! 😃

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**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/190 "2004-06-23T14:59:05Z")

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Right, that explains why Euro 96 was such a stellar tournament, eh? 😃

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**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/191 "2004-06-23T15:06:04Z")

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> [@Coldfire](#):
>
> Right, that explains why Euro 96 was such a stellar tournament, eh? 😃

It was great, fabulous and groovy up to the semis - after that it went a bit tits-up.

I seem to remember a rather good game angainst some people in orange. Other than that it’s a bit hazy…

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**Author:** ![Arch\_Trout](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9f8e36/32.png) [@Arch\_Trout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arch_Trout)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/192 "2004-06-23T15:13:14Z")

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> [@owlstretchingtime](#):
>
> It was great, fabulous and groovy up to the semis - after that it went a bit tits-up.
> 
> I seem to remember a rather good game angainst some people in orange. Other than that it’s a bit hazy…

It was great.  
We got to see England think they could score penalties again by beating Spain in the quarters only for a proper team to show them how it was done in the semis.

It was also the year that saw the Bulgarian dream team of:  
Ivanov  
Penev  
Stoitchkov  
Letchkov

And as for Scotland… ☹

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**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/193 "2004-06-23T15:15:00Z")

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You just recalled the only good match of the tournament (and yes, England were way better than Holland that day :)). Other than that, it was the crappest Euro tournament I’ve ever seen. Dieter Eilts was made Man of the Tournament. Eilts, for God’s sakes! All he did was kick balls into the stands for six matches in a row.

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**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/194 "2004-06-23T15:18:05Z")

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The only reason to give the ITalian claims of a fix any credence would be because they are quite skilled at it themselves (not necessarily the national team mind you). Isn’t there currently ongoing investigations of match fixing going on in Italy. Also I rememebr reading the non-fiction book (I cannot remember the name _Miracle of Castel_ something) about a small Italian team that advanced, but the book ends with a game being fixed.

ANybody who saw that game would know it wasn’t fixed.

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**Author:** ![owlstretchingtime](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/958977/32.png) [@owlstretchingtime](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/owlstretchingtime)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/195 "2004-06-23T15:18:41Z")

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[QUOTE=Arch Trout]  
It was great.  
We got to see England think they could score penalties again by beating Spain in the quarters only for a proper team to show them how it was done in the semis.

QUOTE]

Sven, being a devious continental, has hit on the revolutionary tactic of actually practicing penalties and deciding in advance who would take them, rather than letting brave but useless player like Batty and Southgate have a bash. (Beckham Scholes Rooney Owen and Lampard apparently - assuming they’re all still on the pitch).

It’ll never catch on.

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**Author:** ![bbart4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/51bf81/32.png) [@bbart4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bbart4)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/196 "2004-06-23T15:30:12Z")

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> [@Mycroft Holmes](#):
>
> From Dutch TV yesterday I heard that the Czechs will change eight players in the team for the game against Germany. Bazek will be the keeper instead of Cech. Baros, Koller, Grygera, Nedved, Rosicky, Poborsky and Galasek will all be replaced. :eek: Since Galasek and Grygewra play for Ajax, maybe they can convince their teammates to go for the win. Then again, Koller and Rosicky play in the German league. Can you tell I’m worried?

I would honestly believe that fielding the second stringers could very well lead to better performance for the Czech at this point. This is usually when the subs want to show that they’re worthy players too. Nedved, et al wouldn’t probably be as motivated if they play.

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**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/197 "2004-06-23T15:30:33Z")

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Hang on, practicing penalties is continental now? Could someone tell Dickie, please? :rolleyes:

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**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/198 "2004-06-23T16:05:46Z")

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Sweden is continental? 😃

I think games should be played out with one player from each team being removed every 5 minutes during ET until a silver goal is scored. after that, Goalden Goal 4 a side.

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**Author:** ![Legolamb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/4491bb/32.png) [@Legolamb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Legolamb)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/199 "2004-06-23T16:55:59Z")

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> [@Coldfire](#):
>
> You just recalled the only good match of the tournament (and yes, England were way better than Holland that day :)). Other than that, it was the crappest Euro tournament I’ve ever seen. Dieter Eilts was made Man of the Tournament. Eilts, for God’s sakes! All he did was kick balls into the stands for six matches in a row.

Don’t forget Gazza’s goal against the Scots. That was a cracker. Other than that though, I’d generally agree with you.

> [@](#):
>
> Hang on, practicing penalties is continental now? Could someone tell Dickie, please?

It also requires having a part of the brain that understands the best ways to coach players though. Or, you know, a brain at all. Pretty much rules Dickie out.

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**Author:** ![fortytwo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/f9ae1b/32.png) [@fortytwo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fortytwo)\
**Post date:** [June 23, 2004, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/a-euro-2004-thread-better-late-than-never-its-about-soccerball/249832/200 "2004-06-23T17:58:15Z")

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> [@TwistofFate](#):
>
> …I think games should be played out with one player from each team being removed every 5 minutes during ET until a silver goal is scored. after that, Goalden Goal 4 a side.

Hang on a minute, I suggested this idea over 20 years ago!  
(Well, more or less 🙂 … it was just removing a player from each side every 5 mins. but play the whole extra time.)  
You’re a bit more of a sadist than me, I would at least end up with 6 players finishing the last few minutes.  
I’m not sure how thrilled the players would be though after playing a full 90 mins. first.

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